“I’m home!” I took off my shoes and laid it at the side of the door. I unlocked the door and switched on the lights to my house. A still silence surrounded the room. I looked around to see signs of my brother, Himchan, but he was nowhere in sight. I made my way to the kitchen and spotted food on the table with a small note at the side. I grabbed it. “My lovely sister, please eat this made with love. I’ll be back late >.<

I let out a small laugh reading it. I open the cover of the bowl and saw the bowl filled with bibimpap. I smiled to myself. I loved these little gestures from my brother, Himchan. Most of the time, he would not be around after I finished work but through such acts, I knew that he cared a lot about me. After all, he is the only brother I have and that we both relied on each other.

The time was only 10pm. I cleaned the dishes in the sink and went into my room to iron clothes for the next day. I rummaged through my closet browsing each of the clothings I owned when a picture fell from one of the clothes and landed on the floor. I bent down and picked it up. It was a family picture. There was my father, my mum, Himchan and me. Both my parents still looked young in that photo. I remember that photo was taken when I was only 4 years old then and Himchan was 9 years old. I inched towards my bed and sat down while reminiscing about my childhood. My childhood was not like other children’s childhood whereby it was filled with innocence, happiness and warmth. There were darkness and loneliness on which I mostly saw on my mother’s face.

My father was rarely home even for small things like dinner. Every time I asked my mother about him, she would say with a bitter voice that he was too busy with work overseas. Her face would look troubled. My father would only come back for Christmas but he would go back to work the next night. That was how rare I saw his face to be able to spend time with him. Till now, I never knew what his job was.

But the day I lost my parents still felt fresh in my mind. I was in my room reading my book on my bed when Himchan barged into my room looking all flustered and anxious. He closed the door to my room and locked it. He pulled me to the corner of my room and held me close while asking me to stay quiet. I was confused at his actions but I remained quiet as I held his hands tight to remain calm. For a moment, only our breaths were heard in the room and I myself could hear our hearts drumming fast, enveloping the tension that floated in my room. We thought situation would remain that way, just our breaths silencing the room but both of us were wrong.