“So how are you and your hooligan boyfriend doing lately huh huh?” Minji nudged me while we were arranging the new books onto the shelf. I gave her a sharp glance and ignored her question.

“Fine.. he’s not a hooligan..C’mon, don’t be so secretive… I’m your only friend around… tell me something before I die of boredom!”

“Okay okay! We are… normal, we are still in touch…”

“What? That’s it? Nothing juicy or spicy to share with me?! Nothing beyond first base? Or..second base?” Minji snickered with a mischievous look.

I hit her lightly with a book. “Don’t think too far okay? NO such things happened like you think!” Unfortunately, my blushing cheeks gave way and Minji’s eagle eyes noticed them immediately.

“Ouhhh...someone is guilty!! Tell me tell me.. how was he?”

“Hmm… well he was…”

“Julia.” A low voice interrupted me and Minji. It came from behind me and as I turned around, I faced the familiar figure I had been missing and yearning the past few days. I felt appeased feeling his presence near me and every inch of my cells was telling me to drop all the books I was holding and to just jump forward and embrace him. I wanted to feel his warm skin against mine, his long fingers lacing with mine and just us intertwined within the burning love & passion we had for each other.

Instead, his eyes radiated hostility that I had never seen before. His body was rigid and he did not utter or did anything else after calling out my name. He stood there with his eyes fixated on me but the quiver in his eyes told me that he was not thrilled to see me. There was something unpleasant coming off from his vibe and it disturbed me. It depressed the excitement that raged in my chest a moment ago. I was unsettled and anxiety was inching on my skin slowly.

“We need to talk.”

With those four words, he grabbed my hand, making me drop the books I was holding and lead me outside of the bookstore. My mind whirled with so many thoughts clattered at once. I did not have the time to react nor say anything. My body was just following where he took me and part of my head was empty and the other half was filled with confusion.

We stood at the end of the street, around a corner nearby a pet store. He already released my hands from his grip and had his hands on his hips instead. He started pacing around restlessly and that heightened the tension circling between us. I was not fond of this situation, I wanted to resolve and escape from it.

“What’s the matter? You went missing for a few days and now you’re back with this worried demeanour… Can you…”

“Let’s not meet. For now. No, maybe from now onwards,” Yongguk crudely cut my words off and blurted those words. His eyes was locked directly to mine. He meant his words, I could feel it piercing through my heart. I was dumbfounded and was rendered speechless. My body froze and my throat went dry. It felt like a sharp spear struck my heart and all blood was drained from my body instantly. Yongguk just remained at his spot, not helping me in bearing the tremendous pain and sudden shock that surged every part of my body. Instead, he continued pacing around as if trying to find some other words that could better explain the whole situation.

“What are you saying? Did something hap-”

“No! Just.. let’s just not meet. We can’t see each other anymore.” With that, he hastily left me standing there with disorganized thoughts and the unbearable pain of the nasty words that came out of his mouth.

Yongguk was really cold and cruel towards me that day. It made me numb.

And the sun was very up high in the sky blazing its rays but it did nothing to light up the heavy clouds in my chest.