They ask me what am I running away from.

I say that I am running away from my fears.

They ask who it is.

I said that it was him.

"Lee Taemin," Jongin breathed heavily, when he spotted the latter entering the house, with small and heavy steps. His childhood best friend, and someone, who Jongin treasures till this very day. Lee Taemin.

Jongin then grabbed his phone, and dialled a number which he had memorised since the day he met her and hissed," She isn't picking up her phone." "Hyung-nim, noona left her phone in her bag. We can't contact her at all."

Luhan then grabbed his coat, and head out of the house, calling over his shoulder," Look after Taemin, I will look for her."

"No, I will look for her. You stay out of this," the tanned boy growled furiously, as he shoved Luhan aside, as he dashed down the runway, which led him to the street's pavement.

Luhan winced slightly, as he touched the shoulder where her got shoved. "H-Hyung, if you find noona, tell her that I'm sorry, and ask her to come home, jebal," Taemin croaked, as he shifted his eyes towards an certain object.

"O-Oppa," Krystal called out softly, as she made her way to the latter.

"Stay away from me, d-don't come near me," he warned lowly, as he inched his way further from the younger girl. Luhan stared at Sehun, and sighed," Do me a favour, call Jessica, and inform her about her sister's whereabouts, and look after Taemin. He is in a messy state."

Jongin looked around him, as he pressed his phone anxiously at his ear. "Kyungsoo hyung! Noona is missing, and I can't reach her. I am afraid that something will happen to her, hyung."

As the younger latter listened over the phone, his eyes drifted from one point to another, hoping that Seohyun will come in sight sooner or later. He began to ran down the streets, looking for her as he shouted her name loudly.

"Noona! Noona! Noo-Noona," he dashed towards a familiar figure, crouching at the bottom of the tree. Jongin rushed towards her with wide steps, and craddled her in his arms. "Noona," he gasped, as he pressed her closer to his chest, as he tighten his grip around her.

He then heard soft sobs, and he pulled away, lifting her chin to look at her. "Noona, why are you crying?"

"G-Go away," she whispered softly, as she lowered her head automatically, as Jongin frowned. "Noona, stop hiding. I saw you cry before, and this isn't anything bad compared to the other times."

Seohyun then lifted her head, and said," Go away! Can't you see? I am crying because of you, and I don't even know why. I am confused, and my heart is really hurting me! When Krystal said she likes you, my heart literally shattered. I don't want to hear your response, I don't want to hear hers. I ran away. I don't want to be close to you, as I am afraid that I will lose you!"

"N-Noona, this-"

"I am running away from my fear, and you are my fear. I don't want to face you, Kim Jongin! I can't bring myself to face you, when I love you! Pabo, can't you see, that I am trying so hard to hde my feelings, but it doesn't work at all."

Jongin then pulled her to his embrace, and muttered," If I am your fear, what are you to me then? If I am your fear, you are something which will prick me in the inside, and caused me to suffer another heartache silently. Hiding my feelings for you is useless too, noona. I can bear to see you close to Luhan, as I am scared that you will go back to him."

"Stop saying, stop talking. I-I don't want to hear anymore," she replied, as she stood up. Jongin stared at her, silently as sadness filled his eyes. "I-I can't think at all. I just thinking about the past, and I don't want to suffer thr-"

"You are always comparing Luhan-ssi and I in the end, even though I won't do the same at all. But in the end, I will be featured as Luhan number 2. Noona, I don't know whether you still like him, or what. Stop, stop comparing me to him. I am different, and I will never be like him. If I can like you for 8 years, noona, why do this to me in just 8 seconds?"

Seohyun blinked, as her tears fell. She knew she was hurting both of them, and she can easily spot the tears which were glimmering in Jongin's eyes. Just then, it began to rain. Heavily.

As the both of them stood under the heacy downpour, Seohyun can longer differentiate whether Jongin was crying, or whether the rain drops were just flowing down his face. Her vision began to sway, andb blurred as dark spots began to form in her vision. Holding her head, and sobbing softly, her legs gave up on her as she collasped into unsciousness.

"Noona!" Jongin exclaimed, as he rushed forward, just in time to catch her prevent her bad fall. Craddling her in her arms, he shook her hardly," Noona! Noona!"

Jongin sat down on the bed, besides Seohyun, as he watching the older girl sleep. Touching her forehead, he reached out for the cold towel and palced it on her forehead. Sighing softly, he thought,' You are forever making me worried, noona. Forever.'

Standing up, as he stretched himself, he wandered around her room, not wanting to step outside despite the fact tha his best friend was sitting outside. Jongin spotted Seohyun's diary lying on her study table, as he settled down in front of the table as he flipped it open. Scanning through the contents, he flipped to the page where he last stopped.

28th June 2002

Dear Diary

It has been a few months, and my friendship with Jongin has been growing strongly. In fact, now, I am confused. I have fallen for him. I have fallen Kim Jongin. Hardly.

I know that I don't stand a chance, as his heart belongs to Krystal, and to him, I am a just a noona, who he he thinks, just treating him kindlly. Behind my all these actions, I am trying to tell that I love him, and I may not be like her, but I'm trying so desperately just to gain his attention. So badly, just sometimes, I want to give up my feelings on him.

Kim Jongin. My first true love, who I really loved. Kim Jongin, the first guy, whom I ever cared for genuinely, and wholeheartedly. However, his eyes only see Soojung, and never me. Give up on him, might be the best way for me to forget his feelings for him.

However, I love you, Kim Jongin.

- Seo Joohyun

Jongin placed his hand on that very page, as he touched the blue-ink, which has turned into a slightly faded colour. Pressing the creases of the paper away, his heart was racing, as he find out about the truth. Just. Glancing at the lady, who he has been loving and protecting for the past 8 years, he broke into a small smile, as he watched her sleep soundly.

23th January 2003

Dear Diary

It is my second year in university, and I am really glad to say that Jongin has also make to Seoul University, majoring in Law like me. Perhaps, he has the dream of becoming a lawyer to defend for those, who are wrongly accused. Also, Oh Sehun, one of my other favourite dongsaengs, whom I dote on, has also make it to university, mejoring in the same course as Jongin.

I'm happy, as both boys did me proud to be their noona, and also, I am going to graduate in a year's time. Eonnies are busy recently, as some of them began to proceed in relationships with their classmates. Taeyeon, Jessica, Tiffany, Sunny and Hyoyeon eonnies are graduating this year, each of them are going out ot meet the world for the first time with their dream job in their minds.

Taeyeon eonnie wants to be a singer, and perhaps, she might audition, or open a singing school along with Jessica eonnie, which seems to be the most unliekly. Being the maknae in the group, I'm still thinking about my future, and looking at the two boys who have been studying in university for their first time, I start to feel that we should spend time wisely.

You Only Live Once, so live it wisely.

- Seo Joohyun

"As expected, always that wise, firm and proper in her speech," he smiled to himself, as he flipped to the other page.

02th February 2003

It is very surprising. Jongin and Sehun had introduced me to this new guy, who resembles the looks of a deer due to this pair of eyes. His soft brown eyes were staring deep into me, and I know something. I had to move on from Jongin, and accept other guys into my life.

I am ready to get a boyfriend, and perhaps, Jongin was probably just a rush and a sudden one. However, no matter how hard I try, I can't forget that kiddo that easily. He has been in my life, ever since I met him. I'm confused. Luhan-ssi seems like a nice guy, but my feelings are confused.

If I have to make a choice, I rather make no choice. Choosing one decision, will end up hurting me and those around me. For now, let me stay low and slowly decide on my feelings.

If I have to, I will forget and throw away all my feelings for Jongin. The boy who I first love, and will never forget him.

- Seo Joohyun

Jongin shut his eyes for a moment, before reopening them. Those words that Seohyun wrote, about her throwing her feelings away, casued many confused thoughts to rush through his mind. 'She does it so easily, but I do it so painfully and slowly. I can't throw them away, at all."

25th February 2003

I cried. I cried because I accepted Luhan into my life, and walked out from Jongin's life. I cried, because I feel that I ahve make such a supid regret, a regret that I probably can't rewind back, or change at all.

I said 'yes' to Luhan, and now, Jongin is avoiding me, giving me my own personal space, as he drifts away from me. I cried, because it hurts me to forget Jongin. I cried, because, Jongin means alot to me, literally my whole world, but now, I have to accept Xi Luhan.

Jongin is my past, he is a needle which pricks me time by time, cuasing me to bleed enddlessly. Luhan is the thread, sewing me back, curing my wounds. Jongin, he means the world to me, but Soojung means the most to him.

Forgetting him is for my own good, and I believe that Luhan can make me smile the way that Jongin does. I'm sorry, but Jongin, I have to forget my feelings for you. Even it means you going away from me, I have to let you go.

You probably can find someone who can love you more than me, and love her back like how I love you, Kim Jongin.

- Seo Joohyun

Jongin let out a soft sigh, as he shut the diary. Feeling the tears b at the corners of his eyes, he wiped it away when he heard a knock on the room door. Turning around, to see the intruder.

"Hyung-nim, the rest are here, including Luhan hyung-nim and Yoona-ssi. They are all outside, and preferably, noona shouldn't go outside at all," Sehun whispered, as the tanned latter stood up softly. Nodding his head, he walked towards Seohyun, and covered her with the blanket.

Jongin then looked at Sehun, and asked," Noona, I like her, but, Luhan-ssi likes her too. Ottokae, Sehun? What should I do?"

=====================================================================================================================================================

[ A/N ] Hello to my dear readers, I am so glad to see more people subscribing, and also the upvotes are increasing. Thank you to those who recently subscribed, and upvoted. I think, you guys here are the best and I should really shout out a thank to you all <3

Also, for supporting me and my stories, really, thank you guys! I never recevied such compliments /pedo face alert/ but ILY all

REGRETS WILL PROBABLY BE THE MOST MEMORABLE STORY, ALONG SIDE WITH THE OTHER STORIES! THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT <3

Have a nice week ahead~

_insanegirl_