Letting Go

Righteousness, Letting Go, Denial, & Ephebophilia

Thank you very much for the comments! I really really really appreciate it :D 

It's going to be a little bit sad now.............


 

 

 

Tiffany’s POV

            I couldn’t talk about it with Yuri last night. Ever since Christmas, I can’t stop thinking about it. The way Taeyeon’s mom talked about Yuri’s condition, it shattered my hopes. She clearly stated her opinion about same gender relationship. I don’t want us to end badly like Yuri and Jessica did. So I’m making the decision.

            I take a deep breath before I knock on her door.

            “Come in!” I open the door and she’s on her chair, facing her laptop. Her roommate is reading a magazine on her bed.

            “Hi.”

            “Hey! You must be looking for me.” Her roommate tries to be funny while my girl turns her head and smiles lovingly at me. I guess this will be the last time she would give me that loving smile.

            “Actually, I need to talk to her, if you don’t mind.” I point my finger at my girlfriend.            

            “Fine, fine. But don’t take too long, I need my beauty sleep.”

            After her roommate went out, I close the door behind me and she turns her body to face me fully.

            “What’s up?” she holds out her hand for me but I don’t move from where I stand. I look at her with sad expression instead. Oh gosh, how do I do this?

            “What’s going on? Are you okay?” worried tone and she stands up from her chair. She takes a step towards me and I take one step back.

            “Let’s break up.” I blurt it out.

            She freezes on her spot.

            “I know you’ve been thinking about it ever since that Christmas lunch with your family.” My chest starts to get tight but I have to finish what I need to say.

            “Judging from that, eventually you’re going to choose between me or your family. I don’t want you to do that. I don’t want to burden you with that.” It’s getting harder for me to breathe.

            “So I’m making the decision for you..... I’m... letting you go. I love you enough to let go.” I know she’s looking at me but I don’t know her expression because my vision starts to get blurry due to the tears I tried to hold.   

            “You love me enough to let go? What kind of a reason is that? You don’t love me enough to fight for us.”

            I was taken aback. I never expect this to be her reaction. I felt rush of anger coursed through me.

            “Do YOU love me enough to fight for us?? You don’t even have the courage to hold my hand in public! Let alone telling your family about us!” My tears stream down my face as I shouted those words. I don’t even realize what I just said to her as rage has taken over me. 

            Silence engulfs us for sometime. She stays quiet, unsure what to do or say.

            “Answer me!!”

            She looks away.

            I wipe my tears as I say my last words to her, “We’re over.”

 

 

Taeyeon’s POV

            What just happened? Did she just..... break up with me? I sit lifelessly on the edge my bed. What was she saying earlier? She doesn’t want to burden me with what? Choosing between her and my family? I haven’t even told my family and she’s backing out already? We haven’t started the war yet, but she’s already raised the white flag.

            I don’t even realize that my tears has come pour down my face and Hyomin is in front of me. Shaking my shoulder, trying to get me back to reality.

            “Tae! Taeyeon! Can you hear me?! Why are you crying? What’s going on?!”

            I hold her arms, stopping her from shaking me. Finally, back to my senses. I look straight at her worried eyes.

            “Tiffany.... broke up with me.” I answer her. She looks at me, flabbergasted. She sits beside me and hugs me while patting my back. After I let out all my tears, I start talking.   

            “I don’t even understand why. She said she loves me enough to let me go. She doesn’t want me to choose between her and my family, she doesn’t want to be a burden to me. So she broke up with me? What.... what does that mean, Hyomin-ah? What the hell does that mean!”

            Hyomin doesn’t answer me right away. I think she’s trying to interpret what I was saying in her mind.

            “I think.... she doesn’t want what happened to Yuri and Jessica happen to you guys.”

            “I haven’t even told my family yet. How can she be so sure about the outcome? And even if my family doesn’t approve, I won’t give up that easily on her. I will find a way.”

            “Is there a way?”

            “I'll make a way! I’m willing to fight, but she.... she... she doesn’t love me enough to fight with me.”

            “What? No, you’re taking it wrong. She doesn’t want you to experience the same thing that Yuri did.”

            “We don’t know about that yet! Why are you siding with her?!” sadness, confusion, anger it’s all mixed up in my heart. I stand up and face her.

            “I am not siding with her! I’m not siding with anyone. Just calm down, Tae. Calm down.” She rubs my arm in a soothing manner.

            “How can I calm down?! How can I, when I just lost the one I love!” I retract my arm and look down. That just sinks on me. I lost her.

            “I lost her, Hyomin-ah. I lost her.” Hyomin stands up and pulls me in a hug.

            “You’ll get her back. You will.”

 

 

Yuri’s POV

            As usual, I come home when everybody’s already on their room. I go to my room and surprisingly, the lights are off. I guess she’s asleep already. But suddenly I hear a faint sob. Is she crying? I approach her bed. She pulls the cover up to her head.

            “Fany-ah? Are you okay?” I pull the cover down to reveal her face. She’s definitely crying.

            “What happened?” I ask worriedly. She sits up and hugs me. I hug her back. “What’s going on? Are you sick or something?” She shakes her head. After some time, her cried subside and she pulls away from me.

            “I broke up with Taeyeon.” She says as she wipes her remaining tears.

            “WHAT? Don’t tell me your fam-”

            “No. My dad is fine. It’s hers.”

            “Her family doesn’t accept her?”

            She told me about what happened on Christmas. She’s clearly afraid that Taeyeon would do the same thing I did. She’s trying to protect her heart and also Taeyeon’s. She doesn’t want to be the rift in Taeyeon’s relationship and her family. She doesn’t want that to happen, that’s why she makes the decision to leave.

            “Even though I love her enough to let go, but I love her too much to erase her completely from my life. I still need her around me, Yul. That’s why I told her the truth about my reason. But I guess she’s taking it wrong. And now... I think she hates me.”            

            “No, she can’t hate you. I can talk to her and explain it to her.”

            “Don’t. It’s between me and her, Yul. Thank you for your offer. But I think this is the best for both of us.”

            “Are you sure?”

            “Yes.”

            I feel guilty. What happened to me, eventually happen to them. Not the same situation, but mine gives an impact to theirs.   

 


 

I can tell, I can tell,

How much you hate this

Deep down inside, you know it's killing me

I can call, wish you well, and try to change this

But nothing I can say, would change anything

 

Where were my senses? I left them all behind

Why did I turn away?

 

I wish I could save you. I wish I could say to you,

I'm not going nowhere

I wish I could say to you,

It's gonna be alright

 

I didn't mean, didn't mean,

To leave you stranded

Went away cause I, didn't want to face the truth

Reaching out, reach for me, empty handed

You don't know if I care

You're trying to find the proof

 

There were times I'd wonder, could I have eased your pain?

Why did I turn away?

 

I wish I could save you. I wish I could say to you,

I'm not going nowhere.

I wish I could say to you,

It's gonna be alright.

 

Save You by Kelly Clarkson

 

 

 

 

 

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facade9138
YAY! Finally Taeny story is here :)

Comments

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browtogs09 #1
Chapter 35: Well I read this again..it look like I'll be reading the whole series..:) so how are you?
deungie
#2
Wow... this story is amazing.. I love itttttt ^^
LockLoyalist
#3
Chapter 35: A happy ending for the couples XD At least Soo got someone although he's just a colleague but still. Haha!
taliaamanda #4
Chapter 35: Interesting story. I enjoy it (^_^) thank you
nadyachristy
#5
Chapter 35: Happy ending for yulsic..
thanks for the story author..
YulSicSLTTR #6
Chapter 1: "The lesbian Headquarter" daeback XD
jung_yulian
#7
Chapter 28: yul,, you love sicababy forever huh??
jung_yulian
#8
Chapter 26: well im happy for taeny but for yulsic,,,, T_T
jung_yulian
#9
Chapter 25: please dont over yul
jung_yulian
#10
Chapter 24: WELL I HOPE they together agin hihih