Flashback: Chapter 15

“Two regular coffees.” Tiffany told the waitress, and the waitress left. “You look… New.” Tiffany said. Seated in front of her was a more cleaner, and dignified looking Eun Jae. Her hair was up, she looked clean, her skin was beautiful and the weather was doing wonders for her. She was close to looking like a doll Tiffany used to play with. “Yeah, I finally got a stable job working for the bank. I earned enough and I got a decent place to stay.” Eun Jae replied. The waitress came back with their orders and left.

After a couple of sips from the two Tiffany cleared . “So, why were you waiting outside of the SM Entertainment building? I thought you were supposed to stay away? Jaejoong no longer works there in case you weren’t up to date.” Tiffany said, adding in all the pride she could give into the conversation. She found it truly tacky that Eun Jae would appear, after she found out that SM Entertainment had paid her off to stay away from Jaejoong and remain dead, leaving her daughter to a clueless and pained Jaejoong, leaving him in the state of depression.

“I know, I’m supposed to know about current news considering I work at the bank. I need to be aware of the economy and since I’m looking up the economy on the internet I should at least know if South Korea and is going down.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany saw all the backfiring. Tiffany smiled and giggled. “So much pride for a woman who practically sold herself.” Tiffany said and Eun Jae’s eyes fixated on Tiffany.

“First, getting pregnant with a famous celebrity, ditching him then ditching your own kid at his place because you couldn’t afford anything? Then getting paid off by SM Entertainment. There’s something you call women like that.” Tiffany said and Eun Jae felt her insides firing up. But she knew she wasn’t backing down. “If you are trying to associate me with a e or any of that kind then you are wrong. What I did with Jaejoong was pathetic and childless and just so you are aware, none of your business. I had to give my child to Jaejoong because he had the right and my daughter had the right to a better life and just because I alone couldn’t give her that doesn’t mean she should be deprived. I took SM Entertainments offer because it was for the better.” Eun Jae said.

“How exactly was that for the better?” Tiffany said. “It was for the better because if I didn’t accept it I would have ruined Jaejoong’s life. Imagine all the scandals. And oh, he wouldn’t be marrying you, he’d marry me in a heartbeat.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany slammed her hand on the table, the spoon making a sound and grabbing attention from the limited number of customers. Eun Jae looked around with her eye and everyone went back to their business.

“You …” Tiffany said and Eun Jae smirked. “Feeling defeated?” Eun Jae said and Tiffany got up. “Sit down we aren’t done.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany scoffed. “You don’t own me.” Tiffany said. “That’s right, your company does that’s why Jaejoong left it but you need to sit down because we have to discuss something.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany sighed and sat down.

“Apparently, Jaejoong still doesn’t get the fact that I’m not dead. Obviously SM Entertainment did a pleasant job in keeping that hidden right on. Sooner or later Jaejoong will know I’m alive considering the bank I work for will be holding his account starting tomorrow when he drops by to sign the papers. And I can assure you Tiffany, I will be there.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany was surprised. “SM Entertainment can sue you.” Tiffany said and Eun Jae laughed.

“You and I both know they won’t. If they sue me, it will become public. Once it’s public people will find out why I was hidden, Jaejoong will be pulled into the bright light of the media and I assure you, I know too many lawyers that can keep me safe from jail. A scandal for Jaejoong is a scandal for you when they discover his child with me.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany felt lost.

“You’d let the media rattle your issues with Jaejoong public? Even publicizing your own child?” Tiffany said and Eun Jae shook her head. “Be smart, you know me and Jaejoong wouldn’t allow that. He’d probably send her abroad if not him I will to protect her.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany had enough. “What do you want?” Tiffany said out of the blue.

“Tell Jaejoong I am alive, and that I want to see my child. Better yet, I want to take her. And you will make him say yes because I will drag him to court. Knowing Jaejoong he wouldn’t want it out on the media, because it will affect his entire group and his entire life and you, will be included since you two are getting married.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany looked outside the window, there weren’t many cars.

“Did you ever love Jaejoong?” Tiffany asked and Eun Jae was caught off guard. “What?” Eun Jae asked and Tiffany looked straight at her. “Even once… You knew he was dead for your love, did you ever once feel a sparkle?” Tiffany asked and Eun Jae didn’t answer. “I honestly don’t know how someone like Jaejoong could just fall on his knees in love with the likes of you. Especially since you only knew each other for one night. It took me exactly two years to get Jaejoong to tell me he loved me.” Tiffany said and Eun Jae saw it in clear view.

Tiffany still discovered her as a threat. Not a threat to ruining Jaejoong and her, but a threat to taking Jaejoong away from her. Eun Jae saw the fear in Tiffany’s eyes.

“I don’t want Jaejoong, I just want my daughter.” Eun Jae spoke softly and Tiffany nodded her head.

“Deal…”

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Chapter 16: Touch

After what felt like an entire weight of the world being lifted from her chest, Eun Jae couldn’t ask for anything more soothing than just staying at home and resting. But she knew she had to head back to the place she had worked in before she was homebound for the rest of the day.

Meanwhile, the heavy weight was brought onto Tiffany. She felt her insides churning and she was feeling very light headed. She could barely walk and because of her state she assured that her sunglasses was enough to hide her from prying eyes. Tiffany just wanted to spend the entire day to herself. She didn’t want to see Jaejoong, Jaekyung and most especially Eun Jae.

She stopped and lifted her hands. They were pale and shaking uncontrollably. She embraced herself and tried to calm herself down. “…” she cursed to herself. She wasn’t sure how exactly she was going to do her part of the deal. Without it she’s risking herself. She began to question exactly what went through her to even agree.

-

Jaejoong spent the remaining time of his day at home. Jaekyung was watching TV while he was busy shuffling through the endless amount of papers that contained every single one of his properties and money. Tomorrow, he was about to have the bank help him in keeping an eye on his riches. The door opened and Jaejoong’s attention moved towards the door. There, Tiffany was entering slowly, what seemed as if she had seen a ghost.

Even Jaejoong noticed how much paler she was.

“Tiff?” Jaejoong approached her and despite the sunglasses, he didn’t need to see her eyes to know that she wasn’t looking at him. “Are you okay? You look so pale?” Jaejoong said and Tiffany finally looked at him. Jaejoong stared at her, and slowly began to remove her sunglasses. He saw the tears in her eyes and he began to worry even more. He felt a stinging pain in his chest and a heavy feeling suddenly crawling up on him.

He brought her over to his room and sat her down on the bed. He left momentarily to grab her a glass of water. As he was away Tiffany immediately tried to rattle her brain with ways to speak to Jaejoong and how exactly she had intended to begin the conversation without him storming off or worse, leaving her, forever.

Jaejoong came back and her heart beat just stopped for a mere second. He handed her the glass but Tiffany ended up dropping it to the ground. The shaking worsened and she just had no idea how she was going to even begin to deal. “Jaejoong…” Tiffany started but choked up before she could even move on to the next work.

She sat back down and began to wipe her tears like a crying child. Jaejoong felt confused. He didn’t understand what was going on and he didn’t know how or what would be the right word to ask her what the matter was about. “Jaejoong, I’m so sorry!” Tiffany said in between cries. She couldn’t get the courage to even begin.

“What’s wrong? Just tell me what’s wrong.” Jaejoong asked and Tiffany shook her head. Jaejoong held onto her hands tight as Tiffany continued to cry. “You can, come on, tell me. What’s wrong?” Jaejoong asked and Tiffany shook her head once again. “I can’t!” Tiffany said. The crying went on for a few more minutes until Tiffany felt exhausted and passed out on Jaejoong’s bed. Jaejoong allowed her to sleep there for the meantime. His face was painted in worry and he wasn’t sure what was going on.

“Appa…” Jaekyung appeared from the door and Jaejoong stood up. “Why was mommy crying?” Jaekyung asked and Jaejoong smiled. “She was just happy. They were tears of joy okay? Go ahead and keep watching some TV. If you get hungry I’ll make you something okay?” Jaejoong said and Jaekyung nodded her head as she walked off. A ringing sound began to echo through the entire room.

Jaejoong recognized the ringtone as Tiffany’s. He began to search for Tiffany’s bag and once he found it he shuffled through her things to retrieve her phone. He flipped it over to look at the screen and he felt every inch of his body stiffen. The sudden to urge to throw up was just inches away. Jaejoong placed a hand on his mouth. He tilted his head up as tears were welling up.

Eun Jae Calling

-

Eun Jae ended the call, Tiffany wasn’t picking up. She figured she must have been with Jaejoong, possibly in the middle of talking about it. Eun Jae sighed and buried her face in her hands. “Are you okay?” one Eun Jae’s co-workers asked and Eun Jae simply nodded her head. She sighed and began to wonder what Jaejoong’s reaction would be. She predicted it would be a horrid one considering that it wasn’t really the typical news that Tiffany had to deliver.

“I’m going to head home.” Eun Jae told her manager and he nodded his head at her and continued to talk with a client. Eun Jae grabbed her things and headed out. She nodded at the security guard who opened the door for her and she walked her way home. During her walk home she began to feel the guilt.

She knew what she was doing to Tiffany was wrong. Having to allow someone like Tiffany to go through the pain of having to tell Jaejoong this kind of news, and risking their relationship. Of course it came to mind that there was a possibility that Jaejoong was not over her, that he would chase after her. And where would that leave Tiffany? She didn’t really want to put Tiffany in her current place. Eun Jae was simply angry at the world.

Angry at where her life has led. Yes, yes it seemed like she was living a good life now. She had enough money that she could put two children to private school and one in college. Her home was decent and simple. She provided for no one.

And there it was.

She provided for no one.

Her daughter was with her father, and Tiffany was right. She simply gave away her daughter. She didn’t even consider the chances of Jaejoong pushing her away, or the entertainment company placing her under foster care. She felt selfish, she felt like a selfish horrid human being. She didn’t know how she could even live with herself.

Without even realizing it, tears were already flooding her eyes and going down.

She wasn’t going to live a life like that. She opened her bag and reached for her phone and began to text Tiffany a message of apology. She wanted it to end there.

It was enough.

-

Jaejoong sat on the edge of his bed. He began to breathe normally but his heart beat was still speeding. The phone vibrated and this time it was a message from Eun Jae.

Tiffany, I’m sorry. You don’t need to tell him.

If I’m too late. I apologize. Please be the BEST

mother I wasn’t to my own child. Thank you.

Jaejoong’s tears came back. But this time he held it together.

Now he just felt anger eating every inch of him. He just wanted to punch a wall.

-

Eun Jae opened the door to her home and was about to enter when a text message was sent to her. She opened it up and it was Tiffany telling her it wasn’t too late and that she wanted to meet her now at the jogging side of Han River. Eun Jae sighed and closed her door and made her way.

She was there pretty early. The barrier between the jogging area and the river itself wasn’t enough to keep Eun Jae from crossing over and sitting on the edge, her feet dangling. No one was around to see what she was doing. Eun Jae contemplated on whether or not she would consider jumping over the Han River, die, rot and every inch of her be washed away by water and she’ll forever be known as the woman that was found dead in Han River whose identity will never be known.

“What are you thinking about?” a familiar husky voice spoke and Eun Jae felt her breathing settle. For some reason the sound of his voice had calmed the irritation that was riling her insides and fuming every inch of her blood cell. “You saw the message didn’t you?” Eun Jae asked and Jaejoong sighed. “You lied to me.” Jaejoong said and Eun Jae closed her eyes. Her tears began to fall.

“You bi-“ Jaejoong covered his mouth. He didn’t have the guts to call her out. Eun Jae immediately stood up, her feet by the edge and her hand on the barrier. “Go ahead! Say it! Just say it! You know you want to say it! Why can’t you continue?! I’m a what?! A what?! A ?! Yeah I am!” Eun Jae yelled out the tears that were rolling down her cheeks.

“Maybe you should have just jumped.” Jaejoong said and Eun Jae scoffed. “You don’t need to tell me. I know what I did was wrong and that putting Tiffany through this crap is a total move but-“ Eun Jae breathed in air. She looked the other way. “If you read the message. I meant it. I don’t want to interfere anymore. Jaekyung is happier with her dad. I’d rather have her spend the rest of her life with you and Tiffany, to have two parents that are together. Two parents that will love her and assure her that she will be fine.” Eun Jae said and rubbed her eyes.

“You didn’t even let me speak.” Jaejoong said and Eun Jae shook her head. “You don’t need to. I already know what you’d say. Let’s just leave it at goodbye.” Eun Jae said and Jaejoong looked through the river. He watched at how calm the river was flowing, meanwhile his insides were fuming heavily. “Goodbye Jaejoong.” Eun Jae said and turned to face the river.

Jaejoong just stared at her. He wasn’t panicking. In fact, he felt calm. More calm than ever.

Eun Jae let go of the barrier and allowed herself to fall in the river.

Jaejoong continued to stare. It seemed like nothing to him. He didn’t bother to move a step to grab her hand or ask her to not jump. He just watched and that was all he did. Jaejoong closed his eyes and began to remember the first night they met.

Jaejoong turned to face the woman and she seemed surprise. Her lips were still quivering. She felt really hopeless. Jaejoong felt bad. This was partially his fault. If he didn’t stare at her and scare her then maybe she wouldn’t be like this. Jaejoong pulled the woman’s arm and they headed outside.

“I’m sorry. Please, stop acting like that, you are scaring me really.” Jaejoong said and the woman raised her head and she was now crying.

“.” Jaejoong cursed to himself and she looked back down without hesitation.

“What’s your name?” Jaejoong asked.

“Lee Eun Jae.”

He remembered how her sudden spark of confidence had shined.

“Let’s go to your house.” Eun Jae said out of the blue and definitely out loud. Jaejoong turned to look at her and gave her a curious look. His mouth was about as he was about to say something Eun Jae then pointed at the stop light and said…

“It’s green! Go!” Eun Jae said and Jaejoong took a left turn and headed to his place.

And the feel of her touch…

Jaejoong just gently grabbed the back of her neck and pushed her towards him for a sweet soft kiss

“.” Jaejoong cursed and jumped over the barrier, going after the woman he really loved.

Under all the water, he didn’t need any light to even find her. He knew his own hands would find her.

And when his hands touched her,

He wasn’t going to let go again.