Shhhhh... Do you hear that...

That's the sound of me type typing away...

There's an update!

yeah. I'm still alive :D

FLASHBACK (Chapter 14):

“Hi Jaekyung...” Eun Jae said as she greeted her daughter who was seated opposite of a woman she knew but has never properly met. “Mama, meet my mommy.” Jaekyung said as she introduced Tiffany to Eun Jae. Mama... She calls her mama... Eun Jae felt something pierce her heart. She has not seen her daughter in years and this was a complete shock. Jaekyung stood up from her seat and hugged Eun Jae by the waist. “I missed you.” Jaekyung said and Eun Jae felt like crying.

Tiffany stood up, her heels made her inches taller than Eun Jae. Tiffany forced a soft smile. “Can you get off work early?” Tiffany asked.

Tiffany and Jaekyung waited for Eun Jae to get off work before they headed to another place to eat. Jaekyung kept talking the entire time, while an awkward aura was stringing along Tiffany and Eun Jae. Tiffany had no problem looking at Eun Jae but Eun Jae tried her best not to give a single look at Tiffany. She didn’t know what to do if they had eye contact like earlier.

“I will go play!” Jaekyung said and before Eun Jae can protest her daughter had left her side. There was an awkward silence between the two despite the noise from all the children by the small playground inside the fast food area.

Eun Jae kept looking up and then to the sides, anywhere but Tiffany’s face. Tiffany cleared and put her hand out across he table. Eun Jae looked at it then at Tiffany. “We haven’t formally met. I’m Tiffany.” Tiffany said and Eun Jae nodded her head and shyly took Tiffany’s well manicured hand into hers. As she touched them she felt more insecure at how soft they had felt even at the lightest touch, it could be felt.

“I’m Eun Jae. I guess you know who I am since you and Jaejoong are engaged. I’m sure he’s talked about me and about our little history.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany let out a small chuckle. “I don’t think there was much of a history considering you two only had a one night stand and for some reason he fell head over heels for you. It’s like some lame fanfiction novel made by his fans.” Tiffany said and laughed. Eun Jae felt offended  at how Tiffany belittled her past with Jaejoong, despite how it was.

Tiffany realized what she had said and immediately placed a hand on . “I’m so sorry!” Tiffany was quick to apologize and Eun Jae felt confused and surprised. “I didn’t mean to belittle it or make such fun out of it!” Tiffany said and Eun Jae gave a soft smile as she was waving her two hands in front of her. “It’s ok it’s nothing and you’re right anyway.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany tried not to comment further.

Once again the two were quiet and Tiffany racked her brain for a conversation. “She’s so grown up...” Eun Jae suddenly said and Tiffany looked at where Eun Jae’s eyes were. She was watching Jaekyung come down the slide and running back up and enjoying herself. Jaekyung saw the two and waved at them. Unsure who she was truly waving at they both returned the wave. Tiffany had felt that it wasn’t for her, but she wanted it to be.

“I know, I was able to help Jaejoong somehow raise her.” Tiffany said, trying to boost her pride. “I’m well aware. I see you take her out and there are photos on the internet. I’m glad to know you two are in good terms, especially since you and Jaejoong are about to get married.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany smiled. “I’m curious about  something Eun Jae...” Tiffany asked and Eun Jae looked at her with her bright eyes.

With that, Tiffany felt something inside of her. Jealous? Envy? She wasn’t sure but for some reason she wanted to make her stop giving her such a look with her crystal like brown eyes. “Does Jaejoong know you really are alive?” Tiffany asked. At the mention of that, Eun Jae felt a guilt wash over her and she looked down at her food.

“No.”

Tiffany watched as a dark shadow pass over Eun Jae’s face. “How come...” Tiffany asked and Eun Jae put on a smile trying to hide the fact that her tears were inches away from falling. “Because his former company had me keep my mouth shut. They paid me a lot of money for it. I won’t deny that fact. And I guess, I stopped seeing Jaekyung for the time. I was afraid that Jaejoong would find out and then it would breach my contract with his former company and they would sue me. It was in fine print that they could.” Jaekyung said and Tiffany nodded her head.

“How much was the offer?” Tiffany asked and Eun Jae felt a bit confused. “I’m sorry if it seemed personal I would just like to know.” Tiffany said, her voice sounding stiff. “Around Forty Thousand Dollars worth.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany smirked and looked away, then back at Eun Jae with a disappointed look on her face. “You traded a life with your daughter and Jaejoong’s happiness for forty thousand dollars worth? Do you know that he grew depressed?” Tiffany said and Eun Jae was overwhelmed.

“I may not have wanted you two to have a relationship but when he found out you died he ran through a depression. At that moment I actually thought he would just automatically leave me. But for some reason he didn’t and later on I found out because I was able to get him through it, because I loved him and he found his way back to loving me.” Tiffany said and Eun Jae wasn’t sure how to answer.

Tiffany opened her wallet and tossed a few bills on the table before getting up. “I’m heading back. We never saw each other and neither did Jaekyung see you. I will make sure she is clear of that. Don’t try to act like the victim.” Tiffany said and walked over to the playground and told Jaekyung that Jaejoong had called for them and they had to leave immediately.

Eun Jae watched as her daughter looked at her wanting to come over but Tiffany kept pulling her. Eun Jae didn’t react. Normal mothers would be running to their daughters side and pushing aside the woman who pretended to be their mother. But she questioned herself when she didn’t. She wondered if she truly was a good mother. If she couldn’t be good to Jaejoong how good could she be as a mother?

She couldn’t consider Jaejoong’s feelings, what more for her own flesh and blood?

-

“You guys are home so early?” Jaejoong said as he welcomed his two favourite ladies inside. Tiffany had a tired smile and Jaekyung’s eyes were droopy. “Someone got really tired! But don’t worry we had plenty of fun. Is it okay if I put her to bed?” Tiffany asked and Jaejoong nodded his head. They headed to his daughter’s well decorated room. Tiffany had helped decorated and most of the decor was her idea. The shade of pastel pink and white covered the entire room. There was a certain female theme to it that made you feel calm once you entered the room.

Tiffany tucked in Jaekyung and she immediately fell asleep without the need of Jaejoong giving her a lullaby or Tiffany reading her. “I can’t wait till I could do this every night..” Tiffany said as she brushed a hand over Jaekyung’s head. Jaejoong admired the way Tiffany was with her. He smiled. Tiffany was a perfect mother. She would give all the love that Jaekyung needed from a mother. At the thought of it, Jaejoong suddenly thought about Eun Jae and his smiled faded.

Tiffany got up and turned, discovering Jaejoong’s dazed face. She approached him and hugged his waist, placing a hand on his cheek. “What’s the matter?” Tiffany asked as she kissed the tip of his nose. “It’s nothing. I just got dazed.” Jaejoong said and hugged her back. He kissed the top of her forehead and looked at his daughter. “You’re so good with her...” Jaejoong said and Tiffany smiled as she buried her face on Jaejoong’s chest, taking in his scent. “I know. I’m glad.” Tiffany said.

-

Eun Jae dropped her things inside her small studio apartment. She wiped away the tears on the sleeve of her uniform before heading to the sink and washing her face. Her eyes had already become puffy. She had spent the rest of the night crying at the park, and crying on the walk all the way back home. As soon as Tiffany hailed a cab and drove away with Jaekyung Eun Jae’s tears fell and she sat there in tears for 30 minutes before she was approached by an employee asking if she needed assistance.

Instead of answering the employee she grabbed her bag and immediately dashed out of the place leaving the money and not taking the change. She walked to the other end of the park where the event did not reach and cried to herself as mothers and fathers were taking their children in and out and smiles were on the faces of complete and happy families.

Eun Jae questioned her life and her decisions, especially the one about giving birth to her daughter and staying far away from Jaejoong. Maybe if she had gave in and tried to approach the love Jaejoong was giving off maybe she would live a decent life. But she knew that Jaejoong’s love was infatuation and not real love. But she wasn’t sure if it was real love and not infatuation. What she knew at that time was that she couldn’t risk anything. That she couldn’t let herself just simply take the risk and possibly lose whatever she could in the end.

So here she was now, a low life waitress who worked an 8 hour shift in a diner with crappy pay and living in a small studio apartment which smelled of dead rats and cat poop. She approached the corner of the room and by the loose wood panel on the ground she lifted it and looked at the huge amount of cash tied into rubber bands. She wanted to give it back, but she couldn’t.

Because even if she did, Jaejoong was still marrying Tiffany and Tiffany was going to be a mother to Jaekyung.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

CHAPTER 15: STRONGER

Tiffany looked at herself in the mirror and couldn’t be more excited. She went shopping for her gown with Sooyoung and Taeyeon. “I thought you were going to get a gown made for you?” Taeyeon asked and Tiffany shook her head. “Nope, I think I’d rather have a ready made gown. There’s a week left till the wedding I can’t keep changing my mind, according to Jaejoong, I do that more often now.” Tiffany said and Taeyeon smirked. “I like the first one you tried on.” Sooyoung commented as she lifted her eyes from the magazine she was holding.

“Really? I think the beads on that dress made me look fat.” Tiffany said and Taeyeon simply laughed. Taeyeon looked down at her watch and realized what time it was. “Oh, hey, I have to go Tiffany. I’m going to meet my cousin today. I’ll see you guys later.” Taeyeon said and bid the two goodbye. Sooyoung watched as she walked away and closed the magazine. “Okay, you haven’t told me the full story yet you know.” Sooyoung said and Tiffany looked around the room. “Later, when we get to your place.” Tiffany said.

After a few more dresses Tiffany finally made a decision and the two stopped by to grab some coffee before heading over to Sooyoung’s house. They were greeted by her three adorable pet dogs. They sat on the couch and it began.

“I can’t believe you actually saw her face to face. Did she sass you or anything?” Sooyoung asked and Tiffany shook her head. The girls changed from coffee to wine. “Honestly, I am terrified of her.” Tiffany said and Sooyoung gave her a look of confusion. “She’s poor, she has no job and I’m going to say… She’s pretty!” Tiffany said and  Sooyoung made a playful gasp. Tiffany smirked and smacked Sooyoung’s shoulder.

“I think she can try and ruin everything for me and Jaejoong. She has a child with him after all. If word got out that Jaejoong’s niece is actually his child, and the netizens made him chose over the child or me it will look bad. It will be worse if he chose me over his flesh and blood and it will look more worst if I didn’t even try to make him chose his child. I just can’t win!” Tiffany said and drank her glass before pouring another.

“Well, it’s been years. No one has figured out about Jaekyung.The media is in favor of your wedding with Jaejoong too. Everyone’s excited but sad that they can’t watch it. That it isn’t being broadcasted live to the entire population of Seoul and even farther than Seoul.” Sooyoung said and Tiffany groaned. “I am so frustrated.” Tiffany said and set her glass down, heaving a sigh. “So what do you want to do?” Sooyoung said and Tiffany gave some thought.

“I want to talk to her again.”

-

“Appa, I’m bored.” Jaekyung said as she sat at the center of the practice room. In three day JYJ will be holding the last day of their tour in Seoul and after that, he will set focus on his wedding with Tiffany and their honeymoon. “I know, but I’m still a bit busy okay? Just wait a little longer alright? Besides, your mommy already allowed you to come with us on our honeymoon.” Jaejoong said as he sat down in front of her.

“That’s what I don’t get. I don’t understand why children can’t go to honeymoons. What happens in honeymoons anyway?” Jaekyung asked and Jaejoong wasn’t quite sure how to answer. His face began to flush red and Jaekyung noticed. “Appa, why is your face all red?” Jaekyung asked and before everything else Yoochun and Junsu entered the room. “Hyung, did you eat something spicy?” Yoochun asked and Jaejoong shook his head.

The practice began and Jaekyung was too bored. She left the training room and walked across the hallway. No one gave notice to her since they were already used to the fact that she was always there. The clicking of heels made Jaekyung stopped. She looked up and it was Han Seul. “Unni!” Jaekyung said and Han Seul smiled. “Jaekyung! I’ve missed you!” Han Seul said as she hugged  Jaekyung. “How have you been? Where’s your appa?” Han Seul asked as she let go of the younger one. “They’re practicing.” Jaekyung said and Han Seul smiled. “Would you like to accompany unni to eat?” Han Seul asked and Jaekyung nodded her head.

They exited the building and headed to the fast food chain that was just in front of the building. They sat there and Han Seul finished first, she watched as Jaekyung enjoyed her ice cream. Han Seul reached her hand out towards the site of Jaekyung’s drink and tapped her finger on the table to grab the little one’s attention. Jaekyung looked up and Han Seul smiled as she folded her arms above the table. “I saw your eomma.” Han Seul said and Jaekyung’s eyes grew, she lit up like a brand new lightbulb.

“You saw eomma?!” Jaekyung said and Han Seul smile, feeling pleased with the way Jaekyung was happy to hear about her eomma. “She told me that she hasn’t seen you in a long time ever since your appa left the group with Junsu and Yoochun.” Han Seul said and Jaekyung nodded her head. “Appa told me that I shouldn’t talk about eomma anymore because Tiffany unni will be my new mommy soon.” Jaekyung said and Han Seul was surprised at what she had heard.

“Your appa said that?” Han Seul asked and Jaekyung nodded her head. She sighed upon hear about it. She grabbed her phone and scanned through her texts. “So this is what you do now? Take children without their parent consent?” Han Seul looked up from her phone and saw Jaejoong coverd with sunglasses, a face mask and a cap. “I told the front desk to tell you I was here since you won’t let me know what your new number is.” Han Seul said, acid in her tone.

Jaejoong scoffed. “I could always call the police on you.” Jaejoong said and Han Seul smirked. “We both know you wouldn’t do that in front of your child.” Han Seul said as she looked at the clueless ice cream eating Jaekyung. Jaejoong looked at Jaekyung as well and he knew Han Seul was right. Ever since Jaejoong left SM Entertainment and the group he had changed a bit. Tiffany didn’t notice the changes but Han Seul did. Jaejoong left them as if she wasn’t a friend. Jaejoong gave her the cold shoulder as well as Yunho and Changmin. “Jaekyung ah, why don’t you play at the play pen over there for a bit okay? Me and Han Seul need to talk.” Jaejoong said and Jaekyung nodded her head as she left. Jaejoong took her seat and stared at Han Seul.

“What do you want?” Jaejoong asked. “Why are you telling Jaekyung not to talk about her mother? It’s only natural she’d love to talk about her.” Han Seul said and Jaejoong laughed. “Why talk about someone who is dead and left her child?” Jaejoong said and Han Seul was surprised at Jaejoong’s answer. “Why are you like this?” Han Seul said. “Does Tiffany approve of who you are now?” she added and Jaejoong felt disgusted by the way Han Seul spoke. “You don’t know anything. And Tiffany accepts me completely, why else would she marry me?” Jaejoong said.

Han Seul wanted to tell Jaejoong so badly about Eun Jae. But she knew that she wasn’t allowed to talk about it, she had to keep it a secret. Despite the fact that only Yunho, manager Jang and Han Seul know about the situation, she wanted very badly to just yell it out to the world. Even if it meant losing her job.

“The next time you want to kidnap someone’s child, make sure it isn’t mine.” Jaejoong said and got up. He walked towardsJaekyung and left the place with her. Han Seul watched through the window as the two crossed the street to enter the building. Han Seul grabbed her phone and looked at her latest message.

It was from Eun Jae…

Could I see her?

-

That night, Tiffany stayed back at the SM Entertainment building for some time.

“Yes, I’ll probably get back to my house late oppa but I want to practice a bit more. My steps for the dance was so artificial. I mean, I get it is but it isn’t the way I wanted it to look. Don’t worry I’ll be fine, if I’m too tired I’ll ask one of the girls to pick me up. You should rest, you have a concert coming up. I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Goodnight, love you.” Tiffany hung up the phone and placed it back in her bag.

She took a few more dance steps to get it right, she hit the showers and headed out after a couple hours. It was already 2 AM when she bid goodbye to the janitor that was cleaning the hallways, and to the security guard that was by the front entrance. On some nights, there were fans camping outside, but this night was different.

“No cabs passing by?” Tiffany asked the security. “None, maybe a few blocks away at the main road. Would you like me to call you a cab Ms. Hwang?” the security asked and Tiffany shook her head. “I’ll do it, just a couple of blocks anyway, goodnight.” Tiffanny said and began to walk.

She grabbed her phone and looked at the time. She was about to send Jessica a message for their plans tomorrow but she came to a stop when she recognized someone from a distance, seated on a bench. She walked slowly and as she got closer, the person turned to face her and Tiffany was surprised at who she saw.

-

“Two regular coffees.” Tiffany told the waitress, and the waitress left. “You look… New.” Tiffany said. Seated in front of her was a more cleaner, and dignified looking Eun Jae. Her hair was up, she looked clean, her skin was beautiful and the weather was doing wonders for her. She was close to looking like a doll Tiffany used to play with. “Yeah, I finally got a stable job working for the bank. I earned enough and I got a decent place to stay.” Eun Jae replied. The waitress came back with their orders and left.

After a couple of sips from the two Tiffany cleared . “So, why were you waiting outside of the SM Entertainment building? I thought you were supposed to stay away? Jaejoong no longer works there in case you weren’t up to date.” Tiffany said, adding in all the pride she could give into the conversation. She found it truly tacky that Eun Jae would appear, after she found out that SM Entertainment had paid her off to stay away from Jaejoong and remain dead, leaving her daughter to a clueless and pained Jaejoong, leaving him in the state of depression.

“I know, I’m supposed to know about current news considering I work at the bank. I need to be aware of the economy and since I’m looking up the economy on the internet I should at least know if South Korea and is going down.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany saw all the backfiring. Tiffany smiled and giggled. “So much pride for a woman who practically sold herself.” Tiffany said and Eun Jae’s eyes fixated on Tiffany.

“First, getting pregnant with a famous celebrity, ditching him then ditching your own kid at his place because you couldn’t afford anything? Then getting paid off by SM Entertainment. There’s something you call women like that.” Tiffany said and Eun Jae felt her insides firing up. But she knew she wasn’t backing down. “If you are trying to associate me with a e or any of that kind then you are wrong. What I did with Jaejoong was pathetic and childless and just so you are aware, none of your business. I had to give my child to Jaejoong because he had the right and my daughter had the right to a better life and just because I alone couldn’t give her that doesn’t mean she should be deprived. I took SM Entertainments offer because it was for the better.” Eun Jae said.

“How exactly was that for the better?” Tiffany said. “It was for the better because if I didn’t accept it I would have ruined Jaejoong’s life. Imagine all the scandals. And oh, he wouldn’t be marrying you, he’d marry me in a heartbeat.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany slammed her hand on the table, the spoon making a sound and grabbing attention from the limited number of customers. Eun Jae looked around with her eye and everyone went back to their business.

“You …” Tiffany said and Eun Jae smirked. “Feeling defeated?” Eun Jae said and Tiffany got up. “Sit down we aren’t done.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany scoffed. “You don’t own me.” Tiffany said. “That’s right, your company does that’s why Jaejoong left it but you need to sit down because we have to discuss something.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany sighed and sat down.

“Apparently, Jaejoong still doesn’t get the fact that I’m not dead. Obviously SM Entertainment did a pleasant job in keeping that hidden right on. Sooner or later Jaejoong will know I’m alive considering the bank I work for will be holding his account starting tomorrow when he drops by to sign the papers. And I can assure you Tiffany, I will be there.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany was surprised. “SM Entertainment can sue you.” Tiffany said and Eun Jae laughed.

“You and I both know they won’t. If they sue me, it will become public. Once it’s public people will find out why I was hidden, Jaejoong will be pulled into the bright light of the media and I assure you, I know too many lawyers that can keep me safe from jail. A scandal for Jaejoong is a scandal for you when they discover his child with me.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany felt lost.

“You’d let the media rattle your issues with Jaejoong public? Even publicizing your own child?” Tiffany said and Eun Jae shook her head. “Be smart, you know me and Jaejoong wouldn’t allow that. He’d probably send her abroad if not him I will to protect her.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany had enough. “What do you want?” Tiffany said out of the blue.

“Tell Jaejoong I am alive, and that I want to see my child. Better yet, I want to take her. And you will make him say yes because I will drag him to court. Knowing Jaejoong he wouldn’t want it out on the media, because it will affect his entire group and his entire life and you, will be included since you two are getting married.” Eun Jae said and Tiffany looked outside the window, there weren’t many cars.

“Did you ever love Jaejoong?” Tiffany asked and Eun Jae was caught off guard. “What?” Eun Jae asked and Tiffany looked straight at her. “Even once… You knew he was dead for your love, did you ever once feel a sparkle?” Tiffany asked and Eun Jae didn’t answer. “I honestly don’t know how someone like Jaejoong could just fall on his knees in love with the likes of you. Especially since you only knew each other for one night. It took me exactly two years to get Jaejoong to tell me he loved me.” Tiffany said and Eun Jae saw it in clear view.

Tiffany still discovered her as a threat. Not a threat to ruining Jaejoong and her, but a threat to taking Jaejoong away from her. Eun Jae saw the fear in Tiffany’s eyes.

“I don’t want Jaejoong, I just want my daughter.” Eun Jae spoke softly and Tiffany nodded her head.

“Deal…”

-----------------------------------------------

better updates in the future lol