I know what you're thinking and I'm truly sorry!

I know its not a long update but I'm hoping you'll

still like it!

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FLASHBACK (from Chapter 12)

“EUN JAE!!” Eun Jae heared her voice being called. She recognized that voice. Even if she didn’t hear him yell, she knew it was him. Eun Jae’s heart beat fastened. She immediately fixed her things and tried her best to be quick but she heard the door open. She hoped inside her locker and closed herself. Jaejoong heard the closing of a locker from the left side and immediately ran there and saw no one but a bag left there. He ran to the bag and opened it up looking for something.

He found a wallet and opened it up, he saw the picture of Jaekyung and a woman… The woman he has been looking for. “Eun Jae! Please stop hiding from me! Why are you hiding from me?! Why?!” Jaejoong yelled. He had enough. The most important question was left unanswered, and he wanted to know the answer. “Sir! I’ve called the police! Please calm down and get out of the employee room!” the manager said and Jaejoong turned around giving up.

“You win…” Jaejoong whispered and Eun Jae heard this. Jaejoong was escorted outside by Junsu, the negotiation with the manager and the employee as well as Jaejoong’s friend Jung Suk was left that none of this would be remembered ever again or let alone leaked to the public. After a few minutes they all parted ways.

“Close up immediately okay Ji Min? Tell Eun Jae to take the next week or two off… I bet this guy won’t stop bugging her…” the manager said and left. Ji Min headed to the employee room and decided to use the back door. “Eun Jae ah… Where are you?” Ji Min said as she looked at the lockers and saw no one so she turned around. Eun Jae finally opened the locker causing Ji Min to turn back immediately. “You were there the whole time?!” Ji Min said and Eun Jae nodded her head. “You guys had the key to the back room…” Eun Jae said softly.

“Why were you hiding from him? Why was he looking for you?” Ji Min asked and Eun Jae simply stared at her friend and tears started to stroll. “Let’s talk about this when we get home, come on.” Ji Min said and helped Eun Jae to fix her things and leave.

-

“Hyung, it’s gotten worst…” Yunho said. “Why did you have to tell him she was dead?” Yoochun asked. “We had no choice. You should know better. Let’s just leave the situation where it is for the mean time… I’m cancelling your following appearances and schedules. Take the next 5 months off. Jaejoong will need all the time he needs. Han Seul, take Jaekyung first, Jaejoong isn’t at his right state to be taking care of Jaekyung…” Manager Jang said and Han Seul followed suit.

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Chapter 13: The Pressure

“Jaekyung, are you alright?” Han Seul asked as she was driving to her apartment, with Jaekyung sitting by the passenger seat. “Why am I not going home with appa?” Jaekyung asked cutely as she scratched her nose. Han Seul sighed. “Your appa and the others will be busy taking a break. They need a vacation and I wanted your appa to have some alone time. Since they won’t be working for the meantime I won’t be too, and I thought I’d be spending this vacation being very lonely. Which was why unni wanted to spend time with you. Is it alright if I do?” Han Seul asked and Jaekyung seemed skeptical. “Unni has a lot of fun games at home! We’ll have tons of fun for this five months!” Han Seul said and Jaekyung finally brightened up.

While Han Seul was making sure that Jaekyung would be fine, the boys were busy packing for a day out by Junsu’s parents’ lake house.

Changmin was wondering if the food will be any good, but then he realized he shouldn’t be judging food.

Yoochun was checking if he should bring something warm, not sure if the night will be cold.

Junsu was making sure he had final arrangements ready and that he was not going to forget any of the keys.

Yunho was contemplating on which gadget he wanted to bring. He decided on his laptop.

Jaejoong on the other hand was busy drowning his sorrows with alcohol. He knew it wasn’t the best remedy. But it was better than any other remedy. His heart was broken. He was broken. He wasn’t sure if he’d ever fell the joy that was meant for him. All the fame and glory, the cash and the girls. Those were nothing compared to how he felt for Eun Jae. He didn’t understand why she wouldn’t meet with him. He was clueless to the reason why Eun Jae didn’t want anything to do with him. He had the looks and the cash, yet someone like him couldn’t attract the most important woman. He knew she needed someone to support her, yet she wasn’t giving in to him. Jaejoong took one last glass and finally passed out.

-

“Hyung!” Yoochun was yelling at the top of his lungs for Jaejoong to come out but nothing. “What if he committed suicide?” Changmin said and all of them glared at him and Yunho punched him on his shoulder. “Don’t say that!” Junsu said annoyed and Changmin rolled his eyes. “I don’t know the passcode to his house’s lock.” Yoochun said and Changmin pushed him aside. “Let me give it a try.” Changmin said and started punching in numbers and before they knew it, the door unlocked. “I’m never inviting you to my place.” Yoochun said and Changmin just walked inside. The smell of wine was evident throughout the whole penthouse. “He’s drunk. Junsu looked through the bathrooms, Yoochun you have the kitchen and Changmin check the balcony, I have the bedroom covered.” Yunho said and they spread out.

“Hey, found him.” Yoochun said as he had his hands in his pockets. The rest came to the kitchen and found him lying on the ground simply snoring. “Do we pick him up?” Junsu asked. “No, we let him lie there and put pretty ribbons over his body.” Changmin said sarcastically. “I was just asking.” Junsu mumbled. “Okay, Let’s get him to his room and clean him up. Junsu, can you make some of that herbal tea?” Yunho said and Junsu followed suit.

They brought Jaejoong back to his room and laid him on his bed. “Jaejoong, Jaejoong ah… Jaejoong wake up.” Yunho said and Jaejoong opened his eyes slowly. “Why are you here?” Jaejoong slurred his words. “There’s a plane we need to catch in an hour. So we’ll be helping you get ready alright.” Yunho said. “What?” Jaejoong replied but the rest ignored him. They stripped him till he was bare and bathed him. Yoochun prepared what Jaejoong was going to wear and both Changmin and Junsu fixed Jaejoong’s things, arranging all his clothes and grabbing all his phones. As soon as they were done bathing Jaejoong they dressed him up and Yunho and Yoochun placed his arm around their shoulders as Changmin brought the bag and Junsu called Han Seul to drop by and feed Jiji from time to time.

“Jaejoong, you need to get your act straight. You represent this group and you’re the eldest among all of us.” Yunho said sternly. Yoochun was oblivious to all of Yunho’s scolding towards other members, Changmin just played music and Junsu was busy trying to get his character into a soccer team based on England on his PSP. Jaejoong simply ignored the things Yunho said and tried his best to not doze off. When they arrived at the airport a hoard of paparazzi were waiting eagerly to find out why TVXQ suddenly announced a vacation for five months.

As soon as the doors opened they were flashing their cameras, shoving their microphones at the boys’ faces and began to talk at the same time, asking the same question.

What is going on?

-

“Ah, feels good to get away from them.” Changmin said as he leaned on the chair and relaxed his entire body. “That took longer than usual though.” Yoochun said. “Pretty much a new record I suppose.” Junsu replied and the others kept chatting about the things. While they were busy, Yunho and Jaejoong were sitting with their manager away from them.

“I thought we were going to Junsu’s parents’ lake house?” Jaejoong said quietly as he stared at the two. “Change of plans. Ever since that announcement it leaked out and now they told us that at 3 AM medias were all over the place.” Manager Jang said. “And as you can see, so was our little trip away from the country was leaked.” Yunho added. “So, where are we off to?” Jaejoong asked. “Paris.” Yunho said and Jaejoong simply nodded his head.

-

“Unni, I want to see my appa.” Jaekyung said while were watching Spongebob on TV. “Aww, sweetheart, they are on the plane. We won’t be able to reach your appa. Maybe tomorrow morning we can call him as soon as you get up alright?” Han Seul said and Jaekyung nodded her head. A few minutes later, the silence disappeared once again. “Can we go see eomma then?” Jaekyung said and she had a pout on her face. Han Seul didn’t want to give in, so she tried to keep her posture fixed. “I’m sorry darling, I don’t know where she is.” Han Seul said and Jaekyung slowly looked down at her half eaten cookie. Han Seul quietly heard a sniff coming from her and she caught Jaekyung rubbing her eyes with her tiny hands.

“Darling I’m sorry, but I really don’t know where she is.” Han Seul said as she switched off the TV and caressed Jaekyung’s head. “B-B-But.. I-I wanna see her.” Jaekyung said as she began to furiously rub her eyes. Han Seul sighed and grabbed her tiny hands, cradling them against her own. “Alright. But we’re keeping this a secret between you and me alright? We can’t tell any of the members of TVXQ or your appa and especially Manager Jang or anyone for that matter okay? This is our little secret!” Han Seul said as she placed a finger against her lips.

They got dressed and Han Seul grabbed her keys. She buckled up Jaekyung by the passenger seat before moving towards the driver’s seat. As soon as she started the engine she knew she was going to regret this. But she felt bad for Jaekyung. She knew how it felt not to have your mother around. It wasn’t easy. And Jaekyung was too young to live without her mother. This was something simple and a one time thing.

-

“Eun Jae ah, don’t forget to close up alright?” Eun Jae’s manager announced. “Yes ahjusshi!” Eun Jae said and bowed as he big goodbye. “Eun Jae ah, I’ll wait for you at the back okay? Close up the front and just pass through the back exit.” Ji Min said and made her way towards the back. Eun Jae approached the door and was about to put the padlock on the chains that were around the handles of the front door when a car parked by their parking lot. Eun Jae’s eyebrows furrowed as she saw a woman come out of the car. She watched as she walked towards the passenger seat. What came out surprised Eun Jae causing her to drop the keys. A young girl who looked exactly like her was standing next to a woman, holding her hand. The young girl waved at her and Eun Jae gasped.

“I’m sorry for intruding onto you like this.” Han Seul said as she circled the coffee mug in her hand. Ji Min was playing with Jaekyung while Eun Jae and Han Seul were at the kitchen talking. “How did you know where I worked?” Eun Jae asked and Han Seul smiled softly. “Manager Jang told me. The boys are gone, including Jaejoong and Manager Jang. They were supposed to stay at the lake house but-” “Yeah I heard a hoard of journalists were waiting for them since 3 AM. It was reported on the news this afternoon. They went to Paris huh?” Eun Jae said as she looked down at her coffee. “Yes, they did.” Han Seul said and Eun Jae heaved out a sigh.

“Is it because of me?” Eun Jae said and she looked up at Han Seul. Han Seul simply smiled at her. “It’s not your fault. Jaejoong acted out of control. Whether you are alive or dead, he should know better. If he truly loved you he’d respect your wishes but just like any ordinary man, Jaejoong is stubborn.” Han Seul said. “I practically watch these boys grow, Jaejoong has not changed. He was still that quiet playful boy he was the moment he entered the business.” Han Seul said and Eun Jae nodded her head.

“I have to know though, why.” Han Seul said and Eun Jae looked at her. “Why are you staying away from Jaejoong like this? Looking at where you live and where you work it seems like you really need money. You do know Jaejoong could give you everything right?” Han Seul said and Eun Jae nodded her head. She began to fight back the tears that were gently falling.

“I do know that. I’m aware of it. I know that he could practically give me the world but it’s wrong if he does.” Eun Jae’s voice was raising and it was beginning to crack. Ji Min heard this and slowly gestured for Jaekyung to follow her to the bedroom. As soon as she heard the door close she continued her explanation. “I had a one night stand with Jaejoong. When I met him at that bar I was only a clumsy waitress who was close to losing her job. I went with Jaejoong to his house and offered myself up, only because I wanted to prove what I’ve become. Or what I would have been in that club. I realized how stupid I was. Then suddenly Jaejoong became so obsessed with me over a one night stand? I couldn’t understand why. I don’t know if it’s because of what I said or he just found the amazing, I don’t know.” Eun Jae said and tears were beginning to fall and she began to brush them off.

Han Seul was finally feeling her pain. It was like the air was delivering it to her body and telling her to feel the tension. “If I went with Jaejoong I would seem like a . But mostly because I’ll ruin him.” Eun Jae said and Han Seul sighed. “If it’s his fame you know Jaejoong would not care. He’d defend you-” “He will but that’s not enough. I’ll leave the rest of my life with him with people calling me names, telling me I’m a and a gold digger and that I purposely impregnated myself with Jaejoong and my lovechild and I’d feel guilty. Most especially because I know what my daughter’s future will look like once I accept that life with him. I don’t want her to live a life where she’ll discover or think that she’s a child made out of a one night stand.” Eun Jae said and Han Seul tried to grab her hand but Eun Jae retracted it.

“Eun Jae, one way or another Jaekyung will know.” Han Seul said and Eun Jae nodded her head furiously. “I know she will but I’m not prepared for her to know it yet.” Eun Jae said and Han Seul nodded her head. “Please don’t tell Jaejoong where I live, I’m begging you.” Eun Jae said and Han Seul nodded her head. The door to the bedroom suddenly opened and Jaekyung began to run to Eun Jae showing her the bracelets that belonged to Ji Min. Ji Min leaned by the frame of the door watching the mother take her child onto her lap. “Did you cry eomma?” Jaekyung asked and Eun Jae smiled. “No baby, eomma’s just cold.” Eun Jae said and Jaekyung hugged her. “I’ll hug you to keep you warm.” Jaekyung said and Eun Jae smiled. “Why don’t you go and play with Ji Min okay?” Eun Jae said and Jaekyung nodded her head as she ran off towards Ji Min.

“Since the boys are gone for five months, I was hoping she could stay with me.” Eun Jae said and Han Seul sighed. “I’m sorry but I can’t allow that. Jaejoong would constantly call and it won’t be a normal phone call. He’d want a video call. And Jaekyung was actually asking to see Jaejoong before she suggested seeing you.” Han Seul said and Eun Jae sighed. “But I can take her here during the afternoons for an hour then I’d take her back.” Han Seul said and Eun Jae nodded her head. “That’s alright with me! I just want to see my baby!” Eun Jae said and Han Seul nodded her head.

-

When the boys arrived they got their own rooms and began to unpack their things. Jaejoong simply laid on his bed when the door opened. “Yo, get dressed we’re going around the city.” Yoochun said and Jaejoong groaned. “Hyung I know what you’re going through but please-” “No you don’t. None of you do. So please, leave me the alone!” Jaejoong said as he pushed Yoochun out of his room and slammed the door shut.

“He’s pissed.” Changmin said as they continued to stare at Jaejoong’s closed door. “He’s more than pissed you jackass.” Yoochun said.