Ambivalence
Please Keep My Secret
After class..
Seohyun entered the gate of their house when suddenly a car parked in front of her. A chubby young man alighted from the car followed by two companions.
“uhm, you’re one of Dongguk’s..” Seohyun recognized
“Annyeonghasaeyo, I’m Dongguk High’s Vice President, Shindong.” Shindong and his two companions bowed 90 degrees.
“oh, annyeonghasaeyo” Seohyun also bowed 90 degrees. “Do you need something from me?”
“May I have a moment with you?” Shindong asked
“Yea, sure” Seohyun gestured them to enter the house. They settled themselves on the Seo’s living room.
“So, what was the thing you needed to talk to me?” Seohyun asked
“First of all, we would want to give you some gifts. Please accept them.” Shindong said while his two companions laid those on the table. “They are gifts from President Donghae.”
Seohyun made a hesitating gesture. “Hnn No, I really can’t accept these gifts.”
“President Donghae really wants you to transfer to Dongguk” Shindong said
“I..I really have no intentions of transferring to Dongguk even if you give these to me.” Seohyun refused kindly. “I really, really appreciate these but please take them back.”
“These gifts were especially prepared for you. It would be a waste to have it thrown away.” Shindong said with a sad face.
“….”
“Please don’t worry. President Donghae did not intend for this gesture to leave you in his debt.” Shindong added. “Please accept them” he said now with a smile.
“Uhhmm” Seohyun uttered.
“President Donghae only wants you to help Dongguk High become a better school.”
Suddenly the door opened revealing Seohyun’s younger sister, Suzy.
“I’m home!” Suzy said in her usual tone.
“Welcome back, Suzy” Seohyun greeted her.
Suzy walked towards her sister and noticed the three unfamiliar young men her sister was talking to.
“Unnie, are they new members of Beast?” Suzy inquired
“No they’re not. Just leave us alone for a moment, neh? Seohyun said
“Araso, maybe I’ll just make some tea.” Suzy said and went to the kitchen.
Seohyun went back to the conversation with Shindong. “Mianhaeyo, my sister is a bit unique.”
“If you would transfer to Dongguk, the President said that he would give your sister a generous deal as well.” Shindong said
“W..well, I think that would be too much.”
“The Lee Chain of Companies has a very great influence on Dongguk High. Please consider this offer for your sister’s sake as well.” Shindong persuaded. “We will wait for another 3 days. We await an affirmative reply from you.”
“But..”
Shindong stood up. “Our Prez will wait for you until you come” then the three bowed 90 degrees.
The next day, Seohyun was walking on her way to school still thinking of what happened yesterday.
President Donghae only wants you to help Dongguk High become a better school
If you would transfer to Dongguk, the President said that he would give your sister a generous deal as well
We’ll wait for another 3 days.
“This is so confusing and bothersome” Seohyun said to her self
Yuri and Sooyoung saw her walking lost in space..
“What’s wrong Seohyun? You’re spacing out” Yuri asked
“Nothing” Seohyun said sadly
“Oh, is it about Donghae? You wouldn’t transfer to Dongguk High, would you, Seo?” Yuri worriedly asked.
“Of course I won’t” Seohyun said
Upon hearing this, Yuri immediately hugged Seohyun and said “Don’t ever leave us neh Seo! You’re the only one we can count on”
“Yah, Kwon Yuri! Watch what you say!” Sooyoung yelled
“Ehh?” Yuri asked
“If we consider Seohyun’s future, we should not let our emotions guide us. It is not bad to graduate from a well known school”
Yuri finally realized that she was being selfish. “Oh, that’s right. Seohyun would have a better future if she graduates from a good school.” Yuri said hesitantly then looked at Seohyun. “Don’t worry too much, Seo” Yuri smiled
“Uhmm, Gomawo, Yuri, Sooyoung” Seohyun said
At school, Seohyun went for her daily patrolling when she heard some of the 2nd year students talking about her. She stopped on her way and overheard their conversation.
“I think it would be better for the Prez to be over there” one student said
“After all, Dongguk High is a prestigious school. Who would turn down this offer? There’s no reason not to accept” another student agreed
“If Prez leaves, then we would be able to do what we want like we used to” a third student agreed
Seohyun has heard enough and decided to leave.
Back in the conversation, Key and Taemin also heard the three students and gave them all a smack on the head
“Ouch! What was that for?” the three cried in pain
“YAH! How can you guys say something like that?!” Taemin scolded the three. “When we were against a student from Dongguk, Prez trusted us and even stood up for us.”
“Do you guys have any idea how much she thinks about us?” Key asked
Suddenly the three looked at each other and bowed their heads.
“Yea, we know” student 1 said
“But if Prez says she wants to go..”Student 2
“..then we could not stop her.” Student 3 continued
At the SC office..
“Ryeowook-ssi, do you know where the Prez is?” Kyuhyun asked
“She went out for the daily patrolling, if you have some business with her, just wait for her a little while.” Ryeowook replied.
Kyuhyun nodded and entered the SC office. After a while the door opened.
“Oh, How many times did I tell you? Do not hang around the student council room if you do not have a business here.” Seohyun said when she saw Kyuhyun.
“I do have a business” Kyuhyun replied
Seohyun looked at him
“What are you going to do about Dongguk?” Kyuhyun seriously asked
“Eh? I’m the SC Prez of Kyunghee high, if I leave, Kyungghee will..” then suddenly she remembered what she heard a while ago.
I think it would be better for the Prez to be over there
If Prez leaves, then we would be able to do what we want like we used to
Seohyun looked away and heaved a big sigh. “It might be nice to be freed from a stalker like you.” Seohyun said
Later that day..
Seohyun arrived home when her sister was busy preparing for dinner.
“Suzy, where’s omma?” Seohyun asked
“I got a call that she suddenly has to cover up for the night shift” Suzy answered
“Hmmft there she goes again working too hard when I said she need not to.” Seohyun murmured
“She’s raising two daughters on her own, so there are times when she needs to overwork” Suzy lectured
“I guess that’s true but..” Seohyun said
“Dinner is ready!” Suzy announced
“Deh.”Seohyun said and sat infront of the table. “I’m sorry for making you go through hard times, also”
“It’s not your fault unnie.” Suzy said nonchalantly. “It’s Appa’s fault for disappearing so suddenly.”
“You don’t have to bring that topic up. Let’s eat up” Seohyun said
“Deh”
While the two were eating…
“Neh, Suzy, would you want to attend Dongguk High?” Seohyun asked out of the blue
“Eh? Isn’t that the school for the rich people?” Suzy asked
“What if you could go?” Seohyun asked again
“Of course, I’d like to. Who would not want to go to a good school like Dongguk but if we had the money I’d rather buy us something to eat.” Suzy said uninterestedly. “Why are you asking?”
“Nothing in particular.”
The next day at school..
Seohyun was still so occupied about the Dongguk thing. In class, she was not able to grasp any of the lessons because her mind was like flying in space. Even her friends, Yuri and Sooyoung, noticed that she was so silent and lifeless. Also in the SC office the members of the Council were all worried because Seohyun did not even say a word. She kept on scribbling on the papers on her desk. The members of the Beast even did not dare to ask her to teach them that day.
At work, she tried to be cheerful but after a while she would again think of the proposal. Luckily, Kyuhyun did not appear to pester her this day or else she would be really pissed.
After work, she immediately went home.
“I’m home” she said sluggishly
“Seohyun, come eat now.” Her omma said
“I’m not hungry omma, I’ll just go to bed early. I’m unusually tired today.” Seohyun replied
“Okay, rest well” Her mother said
12:00 midnight..
Seohyun was very tired but she could not sleep. She was still thinking of accepting the offer or not. Tomorrow would be the 3rd day. She decided to take a breath of fresh air outside to clear her mind.
She was looking up at the starry skies when..
“Seohyun” her mom called. “Why are you still awake? I thought you went to bed early
“Omma, I can’t sleep.” she answered
“Why is there a problem? You can tell me.”
“Actually, there is, mom. I’ve got an offer to transfer to Dongguk”
“Dongguk? But it’s the school for the rich kids right?
“Yes, but the student council offered me a special loan program and because I was credited for my good work as an SC prez at Kyunghee, they would give it for free.”
“That’s a good opportunity to study at a nice school. So your problem is that you are torn between going to Dongguk or staying at Kyunghee?”
“Yes, omma. Kyunghee has grown really attached to me. You see, I’ve really work hard together with the SC to reform some of the old ways of the school and now the image of the school is really becoming better and better. I really want to help the schoolmates. I also have my friends there. But Dongguk is a very good school and opportunities like this rarely come. For my entire high school years, I have thought of other people. This time, can I make something for myself too? I really would like to go there. But the way I look at it, I think I’m being selfish.” Seohyun said
“Seo, you are a very kind person. I am very proud that you grew up wanting to help other people. You are not selfish. It’s just that you cannot also let other people rely on you everytime. If you did, they won’t grow to be the best they could be. I think whatever your decision will be, people especially your friends would understand why you made such a decision. If they see you happy, that’s the time they will also be happy for you” Her mother said with a smile.
“Omma, what should I do?” Seohyun asked
“That’s a question that only you can answer.” Her mother said. “But one thing I can tell you. Choose the one that would make you really happy.” Her mother patted her shoulder.
“The one that would make me really happy.” Seohyun repeated
“Think of it well. Get to bed when you’re done, alright?” Her mom reminded
“Yes, thanks omma.” Seohyun hugged her mom. “You’re the best”
Seohyun’s mom went back inside.
“What would really make me happy?” Seohyun asked herself. Then her mind wandered to everything that happened the past 3 days.
If you would transfer to Dongguk, the President said that he would give your sister a generous deal as well
Don’t ever leave us neh Seo! You’re the only one we can count on
If we consider Seohyun’s future, we should not let our emotions guide us. It is not bad to graduate from a well known school
I think it would be better for the Prez to be over there
If Prez leaves, then we would be able to do what we want like we used to
Of course, I’d like to. Who would not want to go to a good school like Dongguk
It might be nice to be freed from a stalker like you.
Then after so much thinking, Seohyun came up with the decision. The one that would make her really happy. She went to bed that night with her heart and mind at peace.
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