[Soji's pov]

I looked around the streets, hoping to search for something I could gift to Yeji. I know I killed her and it's shameless to visit her, but its the only thing I could do. I couldn't decided on what to give so I decided to gift flowers to her. I bought daisies from a local flower shop and then walked up a hill to her grave. I kneeled down opposite her and prayed, praying for a better life and hoping that she will help Seojun at least...

I walked down the hill silently as tears streamed down my face. I felt a sudden guilt growing inside of me. 'It must mean no...' I sughed. I deserved it. I killed Yeji, harmed Yemin and dared marry Yugyeom. Yeji might still be the curse that will leave with me forever, regardless where I go or who I become, in my next life and so on. However, I hope that she can help Seojun not become a bad person or learn from his foolish mother..

I miss Yugyeom and everyone who used to love me but because of fear of rejection and pride, I don't want them to know where I am now and who I am. From afar, I can see my Father working at a construction site and my Mother by him. I know they aren't biological, but their love for me is great and for that I give thanks. I see my father hold onto his heart, he has heart condition. I wanted to help him but seeing that there were people around and my pride, I stopped myself.

I placed a doll on the floor, the doll that I used to play. I then turn around to leave. My step-sister, Solji saw me. 'Soji-ah!" She called for me desperately. 'Kim Soji, because of guilt you musn't return.' I thought to myself and quickened my pace. I stopped after a while and saw that she picked up the doll and smiled. I turned around and continued walking. I walked unconsiously to the place where I first saw Yugyeom. My hands, unknowingly touched the wedding rings that hung on the chain of metal which strangle me everyday due to guilt and happiness.

 I then returned to the hospital where I see Seojun, smiling at me and told me how his day went. I'm so lucky to have a kid like him but is he really lucky being with a poor mother like me? I don't mind getting hate but I'm worried for Seojun, how will he cope if his friends had known that he had a mother who was once a criminal would he hate me? Stop talking to me? Will he still consider me as his mother? This thoughts make me live in fear everyday...fear that I'll lose my only hope and reason of living. Thinking that I will stop smiling. Afraid that people will bully him...

I don't blame anyone for hating me, I deserve it anyway. For now my only goal is to give Seojun a happy childhood...

~*~*~*~*

Authro's note: Should I do a new book??