I can't do this.

Jaejoong opened his eyes and brought himself to the surface as he desperately gasped for air. He mustered up the miniscule amount of strength left in his body and forced himself to swim the riverbank, where he dragged his tired body back on to the grassy land.

He brought his knees to his chest and quietly cried. 

Yunho was not his, Yunho was getting married, DBSK was a mess, his life was a mess.

He felt so utterly hopeless, and wondered why he dragged himself out of the water. 

Because Junsu and Yoochun needs you. Because your family needs you. Because Cassiopeia loves you.

Does Cassiopeia even exist anymore? Does DBSK even exist anymore?

He lay on the ground for hours, reflecting before he took notice of the sun that was almost directly overhead. Yoochun and Junsu would be waiting.

He brought himself to his feet and trudged home, knowing Junsu and Yoochun would be waiting with a thousand questions. His predictions proved to be true; as soon as he opened the door, Junsu and Yoochun rose from the dining table where they had been anxiously waiting.

"Where have you been?" Yoochun asked, his voice a bit angry from the worry Jaejoong had inflicted.

"I went for a walk."

"I was awake at six and you weren't in bed," Junsu interjected.

"Are you telling me you went for a six hour walk? It's twelve now," Yoochun said.

"I got lost," Jaejoong muttered. He wasn't in the mood to talk; he was quite tired and he didn't want Yoochun or Junsu to figure out he had regained his memories quite yet. He didn't want to worry them any more than they already were.

"Did you ask anyone for directions?" Yoochun was afraid that someone would have recognized Jaejoong if he came into contact with anybody. 

"No, I just sat at the river for a while and found my way home after that."

"Thank goodness." Yoochun pulled Jaejoong in for a hug. "I was so worried about you."

"Me too," Junsu chimed in cheerfully. "At least you're safe."

Jaejoong smiled slightly at their sweet love. Junsu-ah, Yoochun-ah, am I a burden to you?

"I'm tired," Jaejoong said. "I'm going to sleep."

Yoochun pulled Jaejoong into the kitchen. "Take your medicine first; it's quite late but I suppose it's better than skipping a dose."

Jaejoong quietly obeyed and retired into his bedroom. His previous episode in the water had drained him of his energy and he drifted off into a turbulent sleep. 

"Yunho, come with us, please."

"I can't."

"Please, I don't want to do this alone."

"Just go, Jaejoong. You have Yoochun and Junsu by your side."

"It's not the same. Please, just come."

"If you're so afraid of leaving, then just don't."

"Yun, it's something I have to do."

"No you don't. Don't be such a coward and face it like a man."

"Yunho, don't be like this."

"Just leave. It's better for me if you do."

"Yun..."

"Don't call me that anymore. Jaejoong, we're done. I don't know you and you don't know me anymore, alright? We're strangers now. If I see you on the streets, I'll look the other way. If you see me on the streets, look the other way. It's that simple."

"No Yunho, I..."

Yunho stared at Jaejoong coldly and his heel, slamming the door behind him.

He jerked his eyes open and shook his head. The dream was too vivid, replaying his memories he had worked so hard to bury deep in the depths of his brain.

He shuffled into the kitchen, where he heard snippets of Junsu and Yoochun's conversation drifting through the slightly open doors.

"Yoochun-ah, it feels like our relationship's changed."

"Babe, everything's the same. I love you, and you love me."

"But we haven't had any time together."

"Once Jaejoong gets better, I promise. We'll go stay in a small little cabin in the middle of obscurity and have all the time to ourselves and all I'll ever think about is you."

"That seems so far away, Yoochun. I can't wait that long."

"Just hold on a little bit more. I love you, isn't that enough?"

"Yes."

Jaejoong disappeared back into his room. 

So he was a burden.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dissatisfaction: It's a little fluffy one-shot; I got bored of writing angst.