Amber couldn’t bring herself to talk to Kyuhyun, even after Jonghyun had left. That guilt that she felt toward Jonghyun, the guilt that she had hurt him deeply still lingered within her. With that guilt there was also feared, feared that Kyuhyun again would brushed aside her feeling toward him, like the first time.

So, she continued to avoid Kyuhyun. She immersed herself in her practice and used it to push back the feeling that she had for him. She did not want to let her mind idled, because when it idled she would think of Kyuhyun and the fear within her rose.

Simply put, she was being a coward. She feared those three little words that can make or break her relationship with Kyuhyun. I love you, such hard words to uttered.

Amber knew that Kyuhyun had been showing up at her practice. She saw him watching her. She knew that a day would come when she needed to explain to him why she had been avoiding him. However, she was not ready and with the helped of her teammates she would quietly sneaked away from Kyuhyun.

Today was no different; there he was standing in the stand. He was here so many times now that Amber didn’t have to look for him anymore. It was her teammates that had alerted her to Kyuhyun’s presence.

Like any other day before, Amber manoeuvred from court to the change room without Kyuhyun noticing it. Before she could entered the change room she was stopped by her coach, “We need to talk.”

Her coach led her into his office and closed the door. He pulled out the chair for Amber and motioned for her to take a seat.

“What is it, Coach?” Amber asked as she sat down.

He handed her a brown envelop. It was addressed to her, but with the team’s office address on it, “This came in today.”

Amber took the envelope, “What is it?” she asked before opening it.

“Just look at it,” the coach said with a smiled.

Amber slowly pulled out the white papers within and her eyes widen with surprise as she read its contents. “This is real?”

The coach nodded his head, “There were a few scouts that came to watch out last game. They showed interests in a few of our players, one of them being you.”

“Czech Republic is one of the best team in Europe. They really want me to join them?” Amber was in awed. This opportunity that was given to her was once in a life time. This was a moment that Amber had been waiting for her entire life.

“All the information is in there, if you choose to accept their offer,” the smiled on the coach face widen. “I’m happy for you Amber. I would be sad to see you go, but an opportunity into a pro team like this is very hard to come by.”

“Thank you, coach!” was the only words she could utter from her lips as she walked out the door. The brown envelop held closed to her heart.

She was on cloud nine. At that moment everything that had been bothering her vanished.

She proceeded into the change room. As she reached her locker her phone rang. She thought it was Kyuhyun at first, but after checking the caller ID she was utterly surprise.

“Coach Lee?” that was the how she called Kikwang’s dad. He was her first ever basketball coach and the name stuck.

When he spoke his voice was riddled with worried and desperation, “Amber, I know I shouldn’t be asking you for help, but I don’t know who else to call.”

“What is it? What’s wrong?” An unpleasant feeling settled itself within Amber’s stomach. Her happiness slowly unravelled.

After what Kikwang had put Amber through his dad was extremely apologetic toward Amber. He felt guilty and shameful for what his son had done. Amber knew that it was hard for the older man to face her or even called her for help of any kind. This phone call weighted heavily on her heart.

“He called me, Kikwang, a few minutes ago,” the older man sounded so distraught. “He said goodbye to me, apologized for the things that he shamed me for. He said that he was a bad son, that he was a bad friend, a horrible person. He told me that he tried to live without you, but he couldn’t. He said that he was sorry, because his mother and I gave him life in this world, but he will have to disappoint us in that way of his life. He told me he loved us and to tell you that you, Amber, was the only thing that was precious to him. Then he hung up …”

The old man finished. All Amber could hear as she tried to process the information was the sound of the older man sobbing in the background. 

Kikwang knew that his dad couldn’t do anything to stopped him from what he was about to do or already done. Kiwang’s family was living in Europe, Kikwang’s dad was offered a job as a coach there and they moved. They couldn’t do anything to stop Kikwang in time and it was all up to Amber to stop her former best friend from committing an unforgivable sin.

Amber’s feet moved before she could process the situation that is now riddled in her mind. She grabbed her wallet, with only her t-shirts and track pants on she ran out into the chilly autumn evening. The brown envelop forgotten inside her locker.

“Coach, I’m going to him now. His place is only a few minutes from the practice gym,” She paused as she ran into a guy. She quickly bowed and sped off, not even noticing that it was Kyuhyun that she had run into. “I’m going to stop him. I wouldn’t let anything bad happen to him. I promise. I will call you as soon as I can.”

She hung up the phone and tugged it into the pocket of her track pants. She ran, ran as fast and she could. The street seems crowded more than usual this evening and with words of apologies pouring out of she knocked people out of her way. She didn’t look back, if she did she would have saw that Kyuhyun was trying hard to keep up to her. She didn’t slow down.

She ran through the front lobby of his apartment complex and up the stairs. Arriving at his door, out of breath she cried out for him. She banged her fist on his door not caring that she was disrupting the neighbours. No matter how crossed she was with him. He was still her friend and she could not let him take his own life.

She suddenly remembered the past code to Kikwang’s apartment. It was her birthday date. She berated herself for not thinking of it before. She wasted time trying to call for him.

She punched in the code and burst into Kikwang’s apart. He was no where insight. She ran toward his bedroom, but stopped in her track. She saw what she didn’t want to see. A pooled of crimson red blood flow out from the bottom of the bathroom’s door. Amber gasped. The tears involuntarily flowed down her face. She fell to her knees as she banged on the bathroom’s door, calling out her best friend’s name.

What happened next was a blurred to Amber. Kyuhyun who had followed closely behind Amber showed up to see the dishevelled Amber kneeling on the ground in a pool of blood. Kyuhyun gently moved Amber away from the door and with all the strength he had he broke down the door to the bathroom.

It was not a pretty sight. Kikwang lay on the tiled floor of his bathroom, both his wrists were cut, blood pouring out of the wounds. Kyuhyun quickly grabbed whatever towels he could find in the bathroom. He pressed it down onto Kikwang’s wrists to stop the bleeding.

“Amber,” he called to her, but no answered. “Amber! You need to get it together! I need you to call the ambulance now!”

With the sound of Kyuhyun raised voice Amber was pulled back into reality. She fumbled for her phone and dialled the emergency number. She moved closer to Kyuhyun and Kikwang once she was done relaying the message to the ambulance dispatcher. “Is he?”

Knowing what Amber was implying Kyuhyun shook his head, “His paused is weak, but he’s still alive. Now help me out and hold the towel down on the other side of his wrist. Press it down not too hard, but hard enough so it will slow the bleeding. He really knew where the large arteries are. He … really did know what to do.”

Of course he knew what he was doing, Amber thought to herself. He’s a physiotherapist.

Amber pressed down on the towel. She hoped that they were not too late.