"...I think you're wrong," Kai chokes out, looking you in the eyes. You can see the pain in his dark eyes, and your heart breaks. You look down.

"Jongin, all I do is cause you pain. I can't do that anymore," you whisper. 

"__________, the pain you cause me is literally nothing compared to not having you by my side. We both swore always and forever, and that's a promise I'm not willing to break. I made a mistake, ________. I made a huge mistake and I'm so so sorry. I will not let you go though. You're the only one I'll ever love other than our daughter who needs us. Please."

You look into his eyes and you see the emotion and honesty plastered on his face.

"Jongin...I can leave the hospital tomorrow and I'm going to be staying with my mom, okay?" You say, looking at your hands, unable to look him in the eyes.

"_____________...." you hear Kai's voice, dripping with pain. 

"Jongin, I'll talk to you later," you say, running your hand through your hair. "I can't do this right now." Kai ducks his head sadly and stands up, walking to the door. He turns around and stares at you.

"What?" You ask, playing with the edge of the blanket uncomfortably. 

"Nothing..." he says softly, remembering his promise to tell you he loves you everyday if you made it. "I...I just love you," he says, voice cracking as he walks out of the room.

"I love you too," you whisper once he leaves. Finally, you let out all your tears and you feel your baby kick inside of your stomach. You cry, wanting so desperately to call Kai back in so he can feel her kick too. 

~~~

Kai's POV:

This is a mess, Kai thinks angry at himself. I messed it all up. I can't lose her... I need her and I want her for the rest of my life. Love is supposed to overcome everything. I won't give up on her.

"How'd it go?" Kai's mind is brought back to the real world when Suho asks him the question gently.

"She wants to get a divorce," Kai shrugs.

"What the hell!?" Suho says, outraged. "Why the hell would she want that!?" Exo all gawks at Kai's nonchalant behavior about his crumbling marriage.

"I won't let that happen," Kai answers simply, sitting down tiredly. "She leaves the hospital tomorrow and she's gonna stay with her mom. I won't just let her go though, don't worry."

Kai's friends all stare at him, worried. 

"We're worrying, Kai," says Baekhyun sadly. "We love both of you and we can't stand to see you in this state..."

"Have you thought about marriage counseling?" D.O asks gently. 

"No," says Kai. "Haven't thought about anything but getting her back..."

"What were her reasons?" asks Chanyeol, confused.

"Well, she says she doesn't deserve me, but we all know that's the biggest bull in the world because she deserves much more than me. I love her, guys. I know she still loves me, but our really important trust link has been broken. It might take time and effort to get it back, but I will. I have to." 

"Yeah...." says Suho. "I'm glad you have a good attitude about it. I'll talk to her. Just..don't do anything stupid." Suho looks anxiously at his frined he knows can get extreme if his heart is broken. Despite how welll Kai is hiding it right now, Exo can all tell his heart is broken and his soul is ridden with guilt. 

"You also need to forgive yourself," Suho orders. "It isn't your fault and it isn't ________'s fault. It was a freak accident. Don't think in terms of 'fault' it just makes everything worse." 

Kai nods and heads home, giving you the space you wanted.

~~~

Your POV:

You continue to cry, and you sadly spin the ring on your finger with your other hand. You think back to Kai's proposal and how he had promised to protect you forever. You know the accident isn't Kai's fault and you feel horrible for hurting him. You love Kai with your whole heart, and you want him to be happy. You know deep deep down divorce isn't the right choice to make things better for him, because you know he loves you. 

You know his heart belongs to you, and you sigh with regret about everything you've said to your husband today. You don't want a divorce. One of the last things in the world you want is to be seperated from Kai. He's your everything. 

You realize how stupid your logic had been, and you wish you could take it all back. The issue still stands, however, that your trust of each other has been severed slightly. 

You continue to spin the ring when you see Suho walk into the room. 

"Hey," he says carefully.

"Hey, oppa," you greet him, wiping tears from your eyes.

"How are you feeling?" he asks you caringly, wiping a tear from your face. Suho has always been your "gaurdian angel" and is always there for you like an older brother or an appa. 

"Sore...sad...stupid," you admit.

"Yeah...the soreness will go away but the saddness and feeling stupid won't unless you're willing to work things out with Kai," Suho tells you gently yet firmly.

"I know," you sigh. "I know. What should I do, Suho-oppa?" you ask him, begging yourself not to cry again.

"I think you should wake up and realize neither you, Kai, or your unborn baby girl will be happy unless you can both get over feeling guilty and below each other. You need to realize that Kai loves you and that alone proves you're worthy of him. Love doesn't think on levels of superiority, __________," Suho shakes his head. "D.O suggested marriage counseling, and I'm thinking that's a good idea."

"Yeah...Maybe it is," you say defeatedly.

~~~

The Next Day:

You arrive at your umma's house, and she welcomes you in sadly.

"Oh, _____________. I'm so sorry this happened." She gives you a comforting kind of hug only a mother is capable of, and sits you down on the couch. You had already told her everything when she visited you in the hospital, and she was appalled you suggested divorce.

"Umma, I'm so stupid," you let out sadly.

"Yeah. You did something stupid," your mother says bluntly. You stare at her. "Kai loves you, ____________. I've never seen a boy love a girl as much as he loves you and you pushed him away. Thinking you don't deserve him is so dumb, _____________. He loves you and that's all that matters. Love means suffering and it means pain, but love means you can get through it all together. Remember that."

You nod at your wise mother, and notice an envelope on the table with Kai's unmistakable handwriting you adore sprawled on it.

"He dropped that off shortly before you got here," your mom says slowly when she notices you staring. "I'm going to go cook some dinner. Take a bath and read the letter." She gets up and heads into the kitchen.

You pick up the envelope, holding it carefully as you walk to the bathroom. You turn the hot water on, step into the tub, and sink down into the warmth of the bubbly bath that welcomes you.

You open the envelope and unfold the letter written in Kai's messy handwriting that you love. You read one line, and know you'll be crying the entire letter.