(rewritten)

Lillie couldn't divert her eyes from their hands intertwined together and Jinki had to hold in a giggle before pulling her out the door towards the street.

Outside you could start to feel the cold winter air and he tightened his coat pulling her closer to him so that they almost walked together.

They held hands walking down the street towards his car. Lillie was beaming, steam coming out of  while they breathed. She chuckled because of this and because of being so happy, like a little girl walking happily outside.

She glanced at him searching his eyes and Jinki looked back at her when she laughed softly and saw the huge smile on her face. Finally, that smile was meant for him, it was a result of his actions and made him feel all warm inside. He couldn't hold it in for much longer and stopped walking, dropping her hand and turning to face the clueless girl by his side. She looked up at him, holding her breath and Jinki placed his hands on her shoulder, softly moving them down her arms and to her back pulling her against his chest, hugging her body, his head resting on her shoulders.

Lillie's first reaction was to stay stiff. He was hugging her and she felt his warm breath on her right ear. A shiver ran through her and he pulled her closer thinking that she is cold, when in reality all her body burns inside.

Lillie's brain wasn’t working properly so she didn’t react at first, her body doing everything for her, her hands moving to the back of his coat that she grabbed firmly, hugging him back. She closed her eyes, his scent invading her nostrils. He smelled good, manly, clean, comfortable, and perfect as she always dreamed.

So this is how heaven feels like?!

She couldn't help but wonder while she brushed her nose against his shoulder, his hands moving on her back. It was not the kiss she always dreamed about but it was good.

Then reality hit her. She was a no one hugging a man, an idol, outside on the street where everyone could see, take a picture, upload to sns and ruin all his life.

It was enough to make her open her eyes in panic and push him away from her breaking that heavenly hug.

"Are you crazy?" she asked, freaked out, looking around, trying to see if there were people on the street who could have witnessed the scene.

He stared at her blinking without understanding what she meant until he saw her eyes scanning the street.  

"Oh, no problem. There is no one on the street and my car is right behind you!  Besides I'm wearing no makeup, people won't recognize me."

He laid both hands on her shoulders and guided her to the side gently, opening the car door for her, already missing the warmth of her embrace.

Lillie felt like a fool watching him open the car with a serene expression. She was the only worried one and he didn’t seem to be worried at all.

Then she realized that he probably knew better than her. He was living like that for years now and he probably looked in all directions before hugging her. He was not going to risk a scandal because of a stupid hug.

Stupid….it was the first time she hugged a man without being afraid, feeling loved and wanting to hug him back. It was important for her and she wished it had some importance to him too.

Lillie entered his car, settling into the passenger’s seat and tightened her seat belt remembering the first time he gave her a ride home. It felt like a long time ago.

He sat by her side a little disappointed because she took the opportunity of him to act like a gentleman away. He wanted to lean in her direction and tighten her seatbelt for her like he did a long time ago.

Lillie tried to calm down. With all her silly reactions he would regret confessing to her. He wasn't a common man and even a common man would be scared of a person like her. Actually, he didn’t even confess yet. He only said he knew that she liked him. In fact, the only one who confessed her feelings was her.

Like a fool she did it and he didn’t say anything back. Yes, he did seem to lean forward to kiss her but maybe she imagined it. He did hold her hands though, and hugged her.  That must meant something.

She was worried now and her eyes moved to the perfect man by her side, which had a small pimple on his cheek, bags under his eyes but still looked the most handsome in her eyes.

He didn’t say once that he liked her, let alone have feelings for her. Maybe he hugged her because he felt sorry for her. He always said she was his special fan, a special friend. Maybe she ruined everything with the confession. Maybe he was going to talk with her somewhere private, to tell her that they could only be friends or something.

Lillie bit the inside of her cheek nervously, watching him who was completely oblivious to her thoughts and deep concerns.

Jinki had worried of his own, he wasn’t an expert in women but he wanted it to have some meaning for her so he was taking her somewhere special. He was being extra careful to not mess up and miss the right exit to the park. Sometimes he would get confused and forget the way there.

He was concentrated but he still could feel the deep gaze of her on him. He stole a glance at her and his lips moved up immediately. That was the power she had over him, he felt like a fool around her. The desire to make her smile was as big as the will to smile she gave him.

There was something in her that he loved ever since the first time he saw her. Jinki could read everything on her face. Even though Lillie tried to hide, to pretend she was fine and not upset or sad she couldn’t. Not for him, who was studying her for a while.

That made her uncomplicated and different from other women he met, however there was something else she hid from him, something that troubled him.

He stole a second glance at her and her worried eyes set on him.

"Don’t worry no one can see into the car. You can relax! " His car was protected from curious eyes giving him the privacy he needed.

She didn’t seem to be more at ease with his comment and kept watching him as if she needed to say something.

"Are you okay?” he swallowed thinking about his actions before. “Are you upset because I hugged you? Sorry.... "

He was too eager but she was so adorable and he couldn’t help it. Being around her without touching her for months was terrible for him.

"It's not that." Lillie said softly, hardly, hearing her own voice and staring at her hands that rested in her lap.

She was the most stupid person in the world!

He probably was just trying to be nice to her and she had to make a romantic movie around that.

Lee Jinki liking her?!  Yeah right ...

She was holding in her feelings and romantic fantasies for months now and it was finally making her act as if she was crazy.

Tears started to well up in her eyes just when he parked the car on a desert street.  

Jinki smile died on his face when he noticed how the women by his side was covering her face with both her hands.

“L...Lillie?”

She didn’t answer and he grabbed one of her hands, hesitantly pulling it away from her eyes making her look at him with wet eyes.

“Are you crying?”

He didn’t release her hand but stared at her confused and clearly not knowing what to do.

For the first time on that night he wanted someone there with him to help. Maybe Jonghyun, Key...or who knows Minho?! Someone to help him understand what was wrong with her. Was it the hug?! Maybe he frightened her, or was it something he said?!

He caressed her hand confused but she continued to avoid his eyes.

She was on the verge of crying, biting her lip and he thought about finding an excuse to call one of the other members of SHINee asking for help. Jinki would look like an idiot and they would make fun of him for weeks, something that they often made already. So he took that idea out of his head. He had to be gentler with her and try to figure out what was happening.

"Are you cold?" was the stupid question he remembered to ask.

"A little ..." she replied looking out the window and making an effort to keep her voice strong enough so he couldn't notice how she felt and that she was going to cry pretty soon. His hand released hers and she almost whimpered watching him turning on his seat and taking something from the back seat.

"Here" he stated laying a blanket on her lap "this is what I can get you now. But I can stop at some place to buy something warm to drink. Do you want that? "

They reached their destination already but he didn’t mind going somewhere and wait in a long line at a coffee shop, risking being recognized by a fan; all for her.

"It's ok." Lillie answered putting the blanket over her legs. A green fluffy blanket, so much like Onew! She failed to restrain herself and smiled a little.

He felt relieved watching her. Maybe something entered her eye after all and she wasn't going to cry, or maybe she was actually freezing and he was an idiot for not realizing it before.

He looked out the window and then back at her.

"We arrived!" He said unbuckling his seatbelt and moving to do the same to her as a pretext to be closer to her, to touch her. However she stared back at him not moving an inch, a stern look on her face.

"Are you really okay?" he asked once again.

The worried look and the way he spoke softly to her left her even more frustrated. Lillie was not sure if she wanted to kiss him or yell at him. She sighed in frustration and avoiding his eyes, playing with the blanket, she decided to risk it and tell him what she was worried about.

"I think we need to clarify a misunderstanding!"

"Misunderstanding?” he repeated wondering what she was talking about. Maybe… his heart started to beat faster, pain spreading on his chest ”You're talking about what happened at the noraebang? "

She nodded her head and swallowed as if she was having a hard time talking about it.

"You mean that you don't feel anything for me?" He asked in a low voice.

No wonder she got upset when he embraced her. Pabo, he understood it all wrong...She only saw him as her idol and…

"No ... no!" She answered desperately seeing his puppy eyes, or was it bunny eyes?! He seemed disappointed and that made her even more confused.

"I ... like you...That's the problem...I think I like you too much ... you know?" She shouldn’t have fallen for him.

"Too Much? There is no liking too much..." he remarked, happy that his fears weren’t true, and searched for her hands, holding them in his.

His warm hands heated up her own cold hands and they moved closer. So close that she couldn’t stop looking at his bright eyes.

"There is, when the other person doesn't correspond to that feeling..."

Jinki stared at her blankly. So that was the problem. She didn't know he also liked her because he failed to confess properly. He was going to do it after the kiss. He had planned that for a long time at home, walking from one side of his room to the other side making Taemin look at him curiously "Hyung have you gone mad?"

He asked Minjae to leave them alone on that day. But things never seem to go as planned. Relieved, he started laughing. After all, she liked him.

Lillie felt the knot inside her break up and tears started to fall from her eyes. She didn’t like to cry in front of others, but seeing the person we like laugh at our feelings can break anyone.

That’s when he panicked for real. Not even the blanket or a desperate call to Kibum would save him. Lillie was crying and it was all his fault.

“Lillie…don’t cry!”

His plead made her sob even more, her lower lip trembling a little and he hugged her, the only thing he could remember at the moment. It was an awkward and uncomfortable hug, inside his car, but he hoped that it could help make her calm down.

"I'm sorry I misunderstood."

"No, no!" He caressed her back " I'm the one sorry. I shouldn't have laughed! Stop crying, please! I laughed because this is all a big mess…”

The way he held her was different from the last time. It was clumsy but incredibly adorable and she couldn’t resist and put her arms around his neck, making an effort to stop crying while he spoke. 

"Mess?" she asked in the middle of a sob. 

He moved just enough to look at her face, so close to his, her red face marked by tears, her soft lips he desperately wanted to kiss. She sniffled adorably, her arms still around him and he knew he needed to do it then.

"Yes! I was going to confess after the kiss, but then came Jules and I thought you understood what I was feeling and I said nothing, and then I hugged you and you thought I didn't like you or something....and now I laughed but it was because I was relieved. Sorry! I'm not very good at these things! "

Jinki was confusing her with his babbling and he could see that in her eyes. But that seemed to do the trick because she appeared to calm down.

From all that blabbering she could understand two important things: he was going to kiss her and was going to confess. And now there he was all nervous trying to explain and she probably looked awful because she has been crying.  Great!

She hugged him again, hiding her face on his shoulder, not letting him finish what he was saying and Jinki returned the hug, both staying like that for a few minutes. 

He breathed the scent of her hair before speaking. 

“I’ve fallen for you..." That was the best way to end the misunderstandings.  "I have liked you for some time now, but you seem to always run away from me. So Minho suggested that probably you liked me and were scared of getting hurt because I am an idol and I started to notice your reactions and realized he was right. "

"I don't know him personally...but I thank him for that!" she mumbled with her lips pressed against his shoulder.  He liked her!

She should have been incredibly nervous but instead she felt at peace. It seemed like everything was at the right place.  She even felt a certain pleasure knowing that he talked about her in the SHINee dorm. Poor Jinki so lost!  Her arms tightened around his neck.

"Lillie? I'm really enjoying this hug, but my back is beginning to hurt because of this position. Can’t we continue this outside? "Jinki said timidly not wanting to hurt her again.

She moved away from him, dropping her arms from his neck and letting him lean against the car seat.  He looked at her worried, probably afraid of her reaction. 

Lillie was so happy "Oh Jinki they're right! You're an old man!” she cleaned her eyes “Well then let's see what you have to show me. “

Her gaze moved out the window, but she couldn’t see anything that caught her attention.

"Ya!" he replied smiling, glad for her reaction, "I'm not old! It’s not the most pleasant place to hug someone.  Well, let's go! "

Jinki got out of the car and opened the door, giving his hand to her.  Lee Jinki was a gentleman!

He took the blanket and closed the car door while she tightened her coat. 

"Where are we going?"

"You will see!" He said smiling, pulling her by her hand up the street and up some stairs that they climbed together.

At the top was a small garden with views over Seoul. 

He took her up along the wall and they stayed there watching the cars and the lights of the buildings in the distance. 

"So? Do you like it?"

She sighed at the beauty before her eyes.  The Han River zigzagging down low and a whole city full of life without knowing that they were there together. 

"It's beautiful! How did you find out this place? Won’t anyone find us here? "she looked around afraid. 

"Actually the person who discovered it was Kibum! But he shared it with me.  From time to time we come here alone or together.  Don’t worry, almost anyone comes here. "

He extended the blanket on the lawn, sitting on it and pulling her with him.  They both stayed like that for a few minutes, hand in hand, just admiring the landscape that lied at their feet. 

"Thanks Jinki ... I like it a lot!"

He used his free hand to brush her hair from her face.

"You're welcome! Glad you enjoyed it! "His hand was on her face and his eyes were asking permission to kiss her.

That was the moment she waited for, and Lillie moved her body closer to him, showing him that she also wanted it, her lips parting slowly, a smile escaping his lips. His free hand moved to her cheek caressing her skin softly like he imagined so many times, fingers moving to her lips, tracing the skin he would kiss soon.

His eyes moved to her eyes that were now closed waiting for his actions. He couldn’t wait any longer so the distance between them ended when his lips joined hers.

He kissed her softly, hesitantly because she wasn’t moving and he wondered if that was her first kiss.

I wasn’t. However in a way it was. For the first time in her life, she was being kissed by someone she really wanted, by someone she cherished, she was doing it because she wanted not because she was afraid or had to do it.

She was doing it because Jinki was in her heart. Her lips moved, answering to his and her hand brushed against his chest, lightly has a feather, stopping on his shoulder and touching his neck hesitantly.

He smiled against her lips, the hand on her cheek moving to the back of her neck, pulling her more to him, the kiss deepening, his hand tightening her hand that was still on his.

She pulled at his coat as if she wasn’t expecting that intensity and he broke the kiss afraid to scare her.

Lillie was more fragile than he thought and he wondered what she was hiding, how many men touched her lips, how many held her hand. Yet he didn't care. The past was the past and the present was then, when she is was in his arms.

He watched her and the way she was staring at his chest and not at him, as if she was embarrassed or coming to terms with her feelings.

She shyly looked up at him and a soft smile escaped her lips when he caressed her cheek again, both his hands cupping her face.

"I think we have to do this more often" he whispered still smiling, next to her lips.

"Date or ..." She blushed without finishing the sentence. She knew what he meant but it all felt so new to her even though she dated for so long before. While she was waiting for his reply her phone started ringing.

Onew grinned upon hearing her ringtone:  "Ring Ding Dong".

Lillie started looking for her phone in her pockets, acting like a fool and making Onew marvel at how adorable she looked. A kiss can mess up a girl and it's worse when it is with a Korean God.

He became aware of her confusion and gave the purse that was lying on the blanket to her. She thanked him and opened the purse in a hurry looking within its interior. Finally, she found her cell phone and saw that the caller was Jules. Always spoiling the best moments! If she had called a few minutes earlier she would have killed her.

Lillie answered it and a whining voice came from the other side.

"I'm sorry…I know that at this moment you are rolling around with Jinki somewhere...but I need you. I fought with Minjae. It's that ex ...."

"Calm down Jules, speak slowly. Where are you?"

"I'm at the bar where we go many times. I need you. I think I'm too drunk to go home alone. You're not in bed with Jinki are you?"

She blushed with the idea. Jules knew Lillie and yet was making stupid questions like that. She would never...her eyes moved to Jinki who was watching her biting is lip. Suddenly the idea of being in his arms a whole night, being held by him, being kissed, didn't seem that farfetched but…They just had their first kiss seconds ago.

"No ... no" Lillie stuttered looking at Jinki. "I ... we will get you, ok? Don't go anywhere until we arrive! "

She turned off the call and Jinki looked at her confused and worried.

After explaining the situation to him, he got up and took the car keys from his pocket. Both collected the blanket and head to the car in silence holding hands.

On the way, silence filled the car, but it wasn’t uncomfortable and Lillie took the opportunity to thank him for understanding the situation.

Once they arrived at the bar Jinki waited in the car and Lillie walked outside to get Jules. It would be madness if anyone recognized him.

Lillie had just come out of the car when Jules appeared coming from the other side of the road wobbling towards her. She held the younger girl crying.

"You came! I thought you had replaced me with Onew!”

"Hush! Are you crazy? Keep your voice down! "

"Sorry! It’s that ! She called him and he went running to her. "

The brunette grabbed the blonde's arm and put it around her neck trying to ignore the number of French profanities she called the "."

With some difficulty, she opened the back door of the car and shoved Jules inside it praying that she wouldn’t vomit over her new boyfriend's car carpet. Jules lied down immediately swinging her arms in all directions. Lillie sat on the passenger seat and look back to see if she was okay.

"Is she okay?" Jinki asked looking at the poor Jules in the back seat crying and waving her arms as she mumbled strange words. "What's she saying?"

"Oh, a huge amount of bad words. She'll be fine, I hope!" Lillie replied knowing that in a few hours Jules would forgive  Minjae and everything would be no more than a bad night. 

"Oh hello, Lee Jinki Tokki!" Jules rose up and stared at Onew. "Didn’t see you there! Look if you do the same thing to Lillie like Minjae did to me I’m going to ing kill you!"

"Jules " Lillie cried  shoving her backward "You don't know what you're saying!"

"Yes, I know Lillie! Men, they ! I should not have left you with him! I bet you were somewhere in the woods making little bunnies when I called.”

Lillie blushed to the tip of her ears with the suggestion and glanced at Jinki.

He was frowning because he would never treat her like that. He liked her and he also didn't have many ex-girlfriends like Minjae. And even if he had he wouldn’t cheat on her. Now that he had won her heart he was not going to lose her that easily. 

"We better go" he said trying to ignore the "" mentions also. 

They drove silent to the girls' house with Jules in the back seat telling all the things Minjae told her about the "”. In fact, they were not listening to her. They were still thinking about the "little bunnies" and all that happened that night. Lee Jinki had a girlfriend now. Lillie had a boyfriend now and things were going to be different from now on.

With the help of Jinki, Lillie dragged Jules to the elevator, praying that none of the neighbors decided to use it and see a member of SHINee there carrying a crazy French woman singing "Symptoms".

Lillie opened the door to the apartment while Jinki grabbed an almost asleep Jules. They entered the apartment and Jules went wobbling to the sofa and fell down inanimate.

"Good! You save us the trouble! "Lillie exclaimed before closing the door.

She didn’t know what to do or say to Jinki now that Jules was out of the picture. Should she offer him something to drink, say goodbye, kiss him? The last one seemed like the best idea.

"At least she sang our song!" Jinki said suddenly, trying to break the ice with a joke. But for the first time Lee Jinki was not able to tell any jokes. The memory of the kiss and Jules insinuations were still very fresh in his memory.

"I think we should hire her to do animation at our concerts! We can give her a bottle of soju before.”

Lillie giggled at the attempt of a joke.

"Yes she is very good at it." she supported her weight with one foot "hum do you want something to drink or eat?"

"No thank you! I think I’m going. Tomorrow I have a busy day..." he played with the car key. 

"Ok" she was a little disappointed "then what about tomorrow? We can go on a date or something? "she asked hopefully not wanting to be so many hours away from him.

Jinki looked at her sadly and she knew the answer even before he opened his mouth.

"I’m sorry, but I will be busy the rest of the week. I think I have a few free hours on Monday morning."

Of course what was she expecting?! Just because they were dating it didn’t mean that he would find time for her in his huge list of schedules, performances and interviews.

"I can’t! I'm working at that time. It’s ok! “It sounded more to convince herself than him.

The disappointment was evident in her voice because she wasn’t good disguising what she felt but there was nothing he could do. That was his life and she needed to accept it if she wanted to be with him. 

"I promise to call every day and we can text each other all the time. I promise I'll always try to answer ok? And pretty soon I will find some time to be with you." 

"Ok, I understand!" it wasn’t his fault after all "I will send so many messages. I'll be one of those annoying girlfriends! "

Jinki beamed realizing what she said, she just confessed she was his girlfriend and it felt great.

“And I will be a good boyfriend who will always answer! With huge smiles and hearts and stuff like that! ". Quickly and without warning, he kissed her tenderly moving one of his hands through her soft hair.

That action before would scare her but somehow she didn’t even blink when he pulled her for a kiss, when his lips touched hers. It was as if it was meant to be like that.

"Now I really must go!" he said breathless stepping back as if he had to cut all contact with her or he would never leave.

Lillie watched him, for the first time in her life feeling safe around a man who wasn’t her father or brother, wanting to ask him to stay with her, to kiss her again.

"Ok ... give me a call when you get home?" 

"Of course we can talk until we fall asleep. I always wanted to do that and never had the opportunity to do it with a woman. It only happened with male friends which don't sound right now that I said it!”

She laughed with his comment, finding it adorable and funny.

"I think you don’t need to worry about it ..." She already noticed that mister Dubu liked girls.

She followed him to the door and watched him enter the elevator.  

“Thank you!” she mumbled mysteriously when the doors closed but she still could see how he grinned widely at her.

Both knew that that relationship would be hard but both were willing to do anything to make it work.  

I rewrote the chapter...still not as I wanted but still better. Thanks for reading!