(Note: This chapter is rated M for two reasons, there is a very y scene and a violent scene. Dont read if you dont feel comfortable with this!)

 

Jinho watched Lillie from the window. She jumped the last stair steps making him smile. That was one of the reasons that made him fall for her, her sweet childish side.

Since he told Jinki about what was happening he felt relieved. Jinho knew that the one waiting for Lillie inside the car was Onew and that he was also the one who gave her a lift to work on that morning. She was oblivious to what he did but now everyone was protecting her.

She was safer now.

Actually, Jinki was a nice guy and maybe he would make Lillie happy after all. However if he didn’t, Jinho would be there waiting.

When they met Jinho told Jinki how he was serious about her and how he should cherish her or Jinho would steal Lillie from him. The idol frowned and that made Jinho happy. It was a sign that Onew saw him as a direct opponent to Lillie heart.

Once Lillie closed the door of Onew’s car Jinho returned to his desk. A lot of paperwork awaited him.

 

In this world

You are the only person

I want permission to love

 

Jinki watched Lillie close the door of his car and kissed her cheek while she put the seat belt on.

“Hello sunshine!” she beamed at him leaning back on the seat, feeling relaxed to be by his side “you really came to pick me up! Is it really ok? Don’t you have to practice?”

“It’s ok! Let’s have dinner together. I’m famished. I can practice later at night with the others!”

Lillie nodded watching him pull away from the parking spot.

“did you go to the doctor today?”

“Yes. I’m ok! I have green card to start singing again but I shouldn’t overdo it!”

Lillie looked at him while she thought about something else to say.

“What is dinner? Are we buying it?”

“There is lots of food at the dorm. My mom brought so much!”

“She was here?” Lillie asked right away. She wanted to believe she had a secret friendship with his mom since she talked with her on the hospital, an episode Onew never knew about.

“Yes with my dad, earlier today, to check on me. I’m almost fully recovered so she left early.”

“Waaa…”

“I’ll introduce them to you soon!” he said casually, his words that once would make her happy, now made her sad instead. Next week she would be in Japan. She would never meet them.

Jinki noticed the change on her expression and almost told her that he would never let her go to Japan but he kept his thoughts to himself.  He still felt hurt and he also had a plan that it was probably better if she didn’t know about it.

“Your mom must cook really well!” Lillie mentioned watching him.

She couldn’t help but stare at him like a puppy. Ever since he asked her if she was cheating on him he seemed distant. Of course Jinki would still care about her and he was sweeter than ever, caressing her hand, kissing her, asking how she was, if she ate….but something was definitely different. He was serious almost all the time and so mysterious.  She couldn’t deny that she liked that side of him, but at the same time she wanted the other Jinki back.

“Yes she does!”

“Oh I hope I can cook like her someday!”

“You will. Do you know what are you going to cook for me next Saturday?”

“I have some ideas! Rin will help me!”

Jinki nodded absentminded still thinking about his plans and Lillie quieted down and stared outside the window. Time was moving so quickly…too quickly.

 

Oh, as this passing life withered away,

You came to me

The moment you touched my frozen heart,

My life begins

 

She felt his hand touch her thigh and he held her hand on his.

“I’m here…” Jinki reassured Lillie still looking at the road.

 

 

“Hum” Minho moaned chewing the rest of his food, his hand in the air and his eyes closed.

“He was on a diet!” Jinki explained putting food into his mouth.

Lillie closed her surprised eyes and stayed still staring at Minho. It was as if he didn’t eat in ages.

The three of them where having dinner together at the dining room of the dorm, Kibum was absent.  Actually Jinki and Minho were having dinner, she only pretended to eat.

“Aren’t you going to eat more?” Jinki asked pointing with his chopsticks at Lilies bowl.

“I’m not that hungry!” She mumbled and he exhaled frustrated.

She didn’t eat anything; he noticed how she played with her food ever since they started having dinner. It was very frustrating and he only wanted to scold her but at the same time he knew he shouldn’t.

“Eat this!” He said ignoring her comment and putting an egg roll on her plate.

Minho moved to grab it and Jinki glared at him.

“It’s the last one!” Minho whined “And she says she isn’t hungry!”

“No!” Jinki said leaving no room for discussion.

Lillie grabbed the roll and ate it making Jinki smile delighted while she chewed it.

Minho chuckled watching his hyung reaction and stole the rest of the food.

“Can I finish this?” he asked receiving no answer.

Lillie stood up still chewing and started to grab the plates to wash them.

“Me and Minho can do that!” Jinki said trying to grab the dishes she had on her hands.

“No! You offered the food I can do the dishes!”

She stubbornly walked with the dishes to the kitchen and Minho watched how Jinki quickly gave in to her.

Love makes men act like idiots!

He chuckled and Jinki looked at him.

“What?”

“Nothing, I’m just jealous.”

Jinki ignored Minho comment and followed Lillie to the kitchen.

He stood at the door, leaning on the doorway watching her, with her back to him, opening the tap and searching for the dish soap.

“You look perfect there!”

He saw how she giggled, her shoulders moving up and down.

“Washing dishes? That’s a very ist comment!”

“No. You know I didn’t mean that!”

She knew what he meant; she just didn’t want to think about that. It was too painful!

“How is your arm?” he asked making her almost let one dish fall from her hands.

“What do you mean?”

The sudden change on her voice was so clear that he wondered why she still tried to lie to him.

He crossed his arms and walked to her side leaning on the counter.

“The one you bruised in your bed!”

“Its fine!” she avoided his eyes soaping one bowl several times, probably trying to rub the white on them since they were clean already.

“It still looks like it hurts!” he touched it slightly, poking her skin and she flinched in pain.

“A little!”

More than a little on his opinion.

The lack of a smile on his face worried Lillie. He wasn’t the cheerful, smiling bunny Lillie knew. It was as if he knew that she was hiding something. Maybe he still thought she was cheating on him. Knowing that he didn’t trust her was hurtful for her.

Jinki watched her work in silence, his eyes not leaving her face and Lillie felt weird.

“Did Minho finish so I can wash his dishes?” she asked trying to make him go away so she could relax.

“No. Don’t wash his. He can do that or leave for the cleaning lady tomorrow.”

“Why?”

“Just do mine!” He said smiling slightly and she felt a little better.

“Idiot!” She chuckled but he didn’t, going back to his taciturn expression.

“Yo!” Minho entered the kitchen afraid that he was interrupting something he shouldn’t.” I’m going out. I’ll be back later.”

Lillie cleaned her hands on the dish cloth and ran away to get the rest of the dirty dishes from the table on the living room.

Even then she felt as if Jinki was watching her every move and judging her because she was lying to him.

 

 

Jinki changed channels once again and laid his head on Lilies lap.

“I like this drama!” she said caressing his hair slowly, tangling her fingers in his brown soft locks.

“I like you!” she looked down at him noticing how he was watching her and not the television.

Watching television with Jinki, on the couch of his dorm was new for them and she was enjoying it. It was if they were a couple and that was their house. It tasted like a demonstration of what heaven would feel like.

“And I like you too!” she repeated poking his nose. He wrinkled it and she lost all interest in the drama. What drama can win to that man?!

“You are so cute!” She confessed blushing and Jinki chuckled. She missed that, his beautiful smile and the sound of his laughter.

“You are cute too!” He answered back closing his eyes.

“Are you going to sleep?” She asked without receiving any answer from him.

Instead she tried to keep her attention on the drama. She was bored after a while and her eyes moved to him again. Her fingers moved on his hair again and she touched his nose.

This time he didn’t move and she wondered if he was sleeping already. Her finger moved to his lips and Jinki opened his eyes staring at her.

“You have the most perfect lips! I swear! You are just the most handsome man ever!”

“Wow!” he giggled rising up and siting by her side. “I am?”

Lillie nodded. It was true and she wanted him to know.

“Minho will be so jealous…” Jinki joked while he combed his hair with his fingers.

Lillie observed how his fingers moved on his hair as if she was watching a work of art. He noticed it and approached her, his eyes set on her as if she was his prey.

“What are you doing?” Lillie asked while he made her lie down on the couch and he stood on top of her, using his hand to support himself so he wouldn’t hurt her.

“Make out time!  That’s what couches are for!”

She smiled before he kissed her, wrapping her legs around his waist, his hands caressing her thighs.

Lillie circled his neck with her arms caressing his back and the back of his head while his tongue found its way inside .

She couldn’t help but moan when his hand caressed her at the same time he kissed her passionately.

He at her lips and trailed down to her neck giving small kisses.

Lillie pulled his shirt up and caressed his back making him groan and raise himself up so he could grab the button of her pants.

“What if someone enters?” Lillie asked biting her lip.

“God…I’ll kill him for interrupting!”

Lillie chuckled and watched how he ed her pants. She moved her hand to help him and Jinki noticed the bruise.

He grabbed her arm softly and kissed it making her wince before he guided her arm above her head.

“Stubborn woman!” he said with a husky and low voice, making her confused. What was he talking about?!

Then, instead of taking her pants off he pulled her shirt up, his fingers caressing her tummy softly as if he was exploring her. Jinki kissed her below her bellybutton making her rise up her hips so her skin would meet his lips. It was so y how she did it, that he couldn’t stop watching and kissing her soft skin. He end up on her bra and caressed her s before kissing the soft skin between them, which was not hidden by the fabric.

“We should stop…someone can come in!” she warned him but didn’t move to stop him.

He the vale between her s making her gasp and his hands moved down again to her pants and under her underwear touching her. She rose herself again, meeting his fingers and he smiled cockily watching the power he had over her.

That was the y Jinki she knew, the one who could make her wet with only one look. Lillie bit her lip trying not to moan and she felt herself get wet while he touched her.

“W-we should…oh….stop!” she said grabbing his arm with one hand while the other grabbed the couch for support. He leaned down again and kissed her lips while he her, making her get closer to the edge.

“We probably should…I don’t want anyone beside me to see you like this!” he caressed her one more time, slowly, exploring her and Lillie moaned. Jinki buttoned her pants and pulled her shirt down.

He sat by her side as if nothing happened and stayed there watching her. Lillie groaned and sat up, her hand waving in front of her face to try to cool herself. She was so hot and aroused right now.  

He chuckled because she couldn’t hide the fact that she was and she hit his shoulder.

“IDIOT!” it was so unfair how he made her like that. She probably had her soaked right now.

“You know I can do that to you too…” she threatened looking at his crotch.

“No no no…” he repeated protecting that part of his body with his hands.

She giggled and he surprised Lillie when he pulled her to his lap.

“What are you doing?” She asked while he back hugged her.

“You said you wanted to sit on my lap watching a movie. A drama is good too…”

He remembered the wish on her list!

Lillie tried to relax while his hands moved on her stomach and Jinki kissed her nape.

“I also like this!” he said next to her ear making her grasp her thighs. She was already and he was torturing her more. Lillie could feel the bulge on his pants below her and it was so y she couldn’t keep still.

“If you keep moving I won’t be able to control myself! It will get worse!” He said grabbing her hands in his making her stop immediately. It was really hard to just stay there in his lap when she was so .

“I think I can get used to this!” he kissed her neck again making her giggle.

After a few minutes she was finally concentrated in the drama and Jinki kissing her neck once in a while and his hands caressing her stomach was normal.

She felt his fingers touch her bruised arm and she tried not to think much about it.

“You are such a bad liar!” she heard him whisper and for a second she thought about asking what he meant but was too afraid to do it.

 

When you’re tired and having a hard time

Please let me stay by your side

So I can give back to you the love I had only received

Before this life ends

 

 

Jules watched Lillie while she prepared the popcorns to go with their movie date.

Jules knew what Lillie was planning, that she invited her to watch a movie so she could say goodbye to her properly.

Jinki asked Jules to keep quiet but she wanted to hit Lillie so much and scold her for not telling her about Alex.

Since she couldn’t she was trying to pretend everything was alright.

That morning Lillie left earlier to spend it with Minseo and Rin. They went shopping and had lunch together. Once Lillie arrived home her eyes were red and Jules pretended not to know that she has been crying. She was using that Saturday to say goodbye to the people she loved. Minseo, Rin, now Jules and then Jinki with the romantic dinner they would have later.

Silly Lillie! Has if they would let her run away from their lives!

“What’s wrong?” Lillie asked when she noticed Jules watching her every move.

“You are taking a long time and I’m hungry!” the older woman said turning to TV again so Lillie couldn’t see her expression.

“Sorry!” the tokki girl answered in a low voice.

“You should be!” they were talking about something else, not popcorn and both knew.

It was a horror movie and Lillie laid her head on Jules lap. It was rare and Jules normally hated it but this time she let the younger girl do it.

“Jules…” Lillie said ignoring the movie.

“Hum?”

“You know how much I’m grateful for everything you did for me. Right?”

“Hum!” she nodded, her eyes set on the TV so she could keep pretending.

“Thank you for giving me a hand once I arrived in Korea, for my wonderful room, and for Jinki…thank you!”

“Stop that! I’m trying to watch the movie!” she covered Lillie mouth trying to hold the knot inside her so she wouldn’t cry.

“I mean it!” Lillie said with a muffled voice because of Jules hand, trying to take it away from .

“Ok!” Jules said letting Lillie held her hand.

“You are my best friend! I’ll never ever forget you!”

“What are you talking about?” She asked suddenly standing up and making Lillie fall to the floor with a thump.  “I’m going to drink some water!”

Lillie didn’t see Jules hiding on the kitchen and how she opened the fridge and stared inside it without having any intention to do anything. She was just running away from the soppy Lillie. She wanted to punch her so badly and scream with her but she also wanted to hug her and tell her she was also her best friend and she would also never forget her.

 

When I get on my knees and cry before the world

When my feet stop inside the storm

If you alone are standing

Anything, pain or tears, I can withstand them all

(If only you) If only you

(Are with me) Are with me in my life

 

 

“Wow!” they said in unison staring at each other.

“How can you look even more beautiful?” Jinki asked staring at Lillie.

She decided to exert herself and was wearing a sleeveless lace black dress, low necked that left her legs mostly exposed. She would never use something like that outside but once she saw it she thought it would be something beautiful to wear on a night like that, only for him.

Lillie saw how his eyes moved from her cleavage to her legs, desire in his eyes and then he giggled when he noticed her bare feet.

“I was going to wear high heels but I probably would break my nose and we are inside the house so…”

“It’s ok. You can wear them a little for me later. You look so hot I want to hold you here in the hallway!”

“Thanks!” she said acting cutely and making him crazy. “You look stunning too but that is normal for you!”

“I was going to come wearing my tracksuit since I plan to run over your body all night but…”

She hit his chest ignoring his stupid comment.

The white shirt and black suit he was wearing was too much for Lillie. Damn he looked like a prince. And the way he styled his hair in a natural yet out of this world way made her feel like she was inside a fairy tale. It was perfect.

Lillie turned around and he couldn’t help but stare at her while she walked to the kitchen, her hair caught in a bun he would undo once he took her to bed. Her hair falling down her shoulders and over her hard s was the best vision in the world. He swallowed and tried to take his mind away from his fantasies.

 “Wow!” he said once again after taking off his shoes and entering the living room.

The small round table that the girls used for meals had a beautiful dark blue towel with small silver stars and on top of it there was a candle and the tableware ready to be used.

There was only the light of a lamp on and the place had an intimate romantic feeling to it.

“You excelled yourself!”

“I did?” Lillie asked entering the living room with a bottle of wine in her hand.

“Really?” he asked surprised when she put it down with two glasses.

“I don’t drink wine. But you do and it’s R-O-M-A-N-T-I-C!”

He chuckled before pulling her to his arms.

“I can kiss your lips of wine instead!” he said before kissing her.

She kissed him back and then pushed him away when she felt his hand sneaking down her back to her and then under her skirt.

“No! We need to have dinner before!”

“Aren’t you dinner?” he asked making her smile. “I should have brought flowers!” he added rubbing his cheek while she tried to open the bottle and failed.

“It’s ok…”

Jinki grabbed the bottle from her hand and did it for her. “I believe man should do this kind of things!”

Lillie hopped to the stereo and turned it on making Jinki smirk.

It was SHINee songs, only the ballads probably.

One started playing and he couldn’t help but remember that he sang that song for her before. She knew it. She played it first because of that.

“Why didn’t we do this before? We missed all the important dates in our relationship even the 1000 days birthday.”

“What?” Lillie asked tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear making him lose his concentration. She looked too beautiful to handle.

“We didn’t celebrate…”

“Oh I know…I just never remembered them.” She bit her lip clearly regretting it, probably thinking she missed the chance to celebrate with him and now she was going away.

“We can celebrate one year together. It’s coming soon, only some weeks away.”

“You counted?”

“Of course. It’s important!”

She blushed in pleasure and supported her hands on the table making him stare at her and the way the dress fit her perfectly and the outline of her s.

“We should do our romantic gateway that day.” Jinki suggested. “Disappearing together for one weekend. I promised we would do it next time and I intend to keep it. It’s before the JAT so it’s perfect. Let’s do it.”

She looked away and walked back to the kitchen not answering him and he knew what she was thinking. It was too late now.

He grabbed a glass and served himself some wine before placing the bottle on the table.

He paced after her to the kitchen and watched her put a white apron on.

It was like they were newlyweds and he found himself imagining it. It was perfect.

He drank all the wine and put the glass down on the counter watching her look around the kitchen as if she was lost.

“It smells good! Do you need any help?” he asked making her push him back.

“No. Just go sit on the table and wait.”

She seemed nervous and he walked away silently and did what she said, taking his coat off and putting it on the back of the couch. After a while, Lillie appeared on the living room with a big bowl placing it in front of him.

Jinki raised himself and stared at it while she bit her lip nervously.

“I was going to make seasoned fried chicken but then I thought this would be cuter, cos it’s you and me, tofu and chicken…” she blushed and watched him “I hope it’s edible.”

“You made mapa dubu? Really?” he smiled cutely looking at the food. It actually smelled good and seemed tasty.

Lillie took the apron off and moved to serve him.

He grabbed his rice and the chopsticks and was getting ready to eat when she held him.

“No! I should try it first! It may be bad!”

“Just relax Lillie! I bet it’s delicious!” she sat in front of him eating the rice and watched him while he put a mouthful of food inside his mouth, looking like a hamster.

He looked at her expressionless and she started to get worried.

“Is it at least cooked?”

“It’s perfect!” he said putting a hand in front of his mouth “I’m so happy!” he smiled with his cheeks filled with food and she tried it.

It was actually good! She did it. She was so proud of herself that she felt like crying.

“I actually cooked this!”

“You did and I can taste the love!”

Jinki nodded eating his food and Lillie watched him with a smile. Just watching him eat in delight was enough. She would cherish that memory forever!

 

 

“…and I think Jules is probably taking Key to all of her favorite stores right now!” Lillie joked drinking her water.

“No. Kibum is taking her to his!” they laughed, both discussing where Jules and Key went on a date. Lillie wondered where she was going to spend the night. She felt awful that she asked Jules to leave the apartment alone for them.

After dinner they talked about a lot of random things never touching any serious matter and soon they were talking about their mutual friends. It was easier that way…

They feel into silence, while Life played in the background and Jinki stared at Lillie with his thoughtful expression making her uncomfortable. It was as if he was debating himself.

“Are you angry with me? Did I disappoint you in any way?”

He didn’t seem surprised with the question.

“Why do you ask?”

“Because lately you seem different; You treat me even better than before and you are so sweet but you are so much more serious. You don’t joke as often as you did before too…”

“I can’t smile all the time!”

“I know…I just wondered…” She trailed off and he interrupted her.

“I hate when you lie to me!”

Lillie felt her cheeks getting hot because she was so ashamed. He knew she was lying and she couldn’t even say she wasn’t because that would be another lie.

“But I love you and I’m learning how to live with that side of you I don’t understand. I know you do it because in your head it makes sense and I told you once: I love all of you, even the flaws.”

“I also love all of you!”

“I know!”

 

The pain you experience everyday

Let me bear it

 

She played with the glass of water in front of her and Jinki had a déjà vu. Almost one year ago she also played with the glass at the norembang when he confessed his love for her.

He chuckled remembering and Lillie looked at him surprised with the change of humor.

“You should try the wine!” he said offering her his glass.

“Only if it’s from your lips!” she said trying to act y and change the mood.

“WOW! Acting y and you didn’t drink alcohol!” he smirked pleased with himself and she stood up.

“Oh I almost forgot! I made a desert too! Wait!”

Jinki leaned back on the chair and waited staring at the candle in front of him.

He heard a loud sound coming from the kitchen.

“Are you ok?” she didn’t answer so he stood up and walked to the kitchen finding her with her back to him, her shoulders moving while she covered her face, she was crying.

“Are you hurt?” he asked.

She shook her head and glanced at him.

“No! My stupid cake is ruined!” she said pointing at a white cake that fell over the counter.

“ahhh” he wasn’t expecting that so he didn’t knew what to say.

“IM SO STUPID AND CLUMSY!!” she yelled crying “I tripped and it fell! I wanted tonight to be perfect! It needed to be! And I ruined it and it’s the last…”

She covered realizing that she almost said and finally Jinki understood why she was crying.

It wasn’t the cake or the way she was clumsy, it was because she thought it was the last night together and she wanted it to be memorable.

It wasn’t and he was certain of it but if she wanted a perfect night, he would give her a perfect night.

“And it is perfect! You are perfect!”

“No I’m not!”

Jinki approached her with a soothing voice, silence filling the house since the music stopped. The cd was probably over.

“To me you are perfect and I’m not going to discuss this. And I don’t need a cake or any other desert. I have you; you are all the desert I need.”

She couldn’t believe he was being so cheesy but she didn’t have time to answer because he grabbed her in his arms, bridal style.

“Jinki…” she exclaimed while he took her back to the dining room and in the direction of her room.

“Wait the candle and the light!” She cried distressed making him go back so she could blow the candle and turn off the light.

He asked her to grab the bottle of wine and finally he took her to the bedroom.

Gently he put her down and went to turn on the lamp.

“No! The candles!” she said pointing at several candles on her bedside table and on the floor “it’s romantic!” she justified embarrassed.

He smiled patiently and grabbed the matchbox near one of the candles lighting them.

She put the bottle of wine on the bedside table and sat on the bed over her purple covers and pillows watching him light her room. It was magical.

“DONE!” he said finally staring at her.

“WAIT!” she said once again running away back to the living room.

“I don’t believe this!” he complained siting on the bed waiting for her.

She showed up walking slowly and grabbing the door for support and he couldn’t help but laugh.

She was wearing black high heels and looked so hot and yet so cute.

“Are you sure you can walk with that?” he asked giggling noticing how she twisted her ankles walking with it.

“Sure. All beautiful women wear them!”

She walked uncertainly and almost fell. He stood up quickly to grab her but she threw herself into the bed giving up.

“It seems that I don’t apply as one!”

He chuckled and looked down at her.

“You don’t need to wear high heels to be beautiful. Just be yourself!”

Jinki climbed on top of her while she made the high heels fall to the floor with a thump.

He looked at her, his fingers tracing her lips and down to her neck, ending at the vale between her s.

“Beautiful!”

Jinki looked intensely at Lillie and she knew there was no way they would get out of that room now.  He started kissing her neck, at it like vampire Jinki always did and Lillie interrupted his actions.

“Tonight should we do something from your list?”

He looked up at her confused.

“On my romantic date list there was making love in a room filled with candles.” She was thankful that it was dark and he wouldn’t see her blushing. “Do you want to do something from yours?”

“The ert list?”

She nodded and he grinned.

“Sure I plan on doing that!”

He looked around him and noticed the bottle of wine on the bedside table, pulling it to him.

“You should taste the wine!”

“Do you want to make me drunk? You don’t have to; I already want to have with you!”

“No. You said you would taste the wine if it came from my lips!”

“You don’t mean…”

He smiled naughtily and Lillie didn’t say anything. She would do anything to pleasure him. It was their last night…his pleasure was her mission that night.

She stood up using her elbows for support.

“Ok…let’s taste this wine then!”

He smiled one last time before drinking a little of the wine and then kissed her.

At first it was a normal kiss until her tongue entered his mouth. It was like the pepero kiss but this time it wasn’t chocolate what she tasted inside his mouth and on his tongue. Lillie didn’t like wine but she did like when he kissed her like that.

His hands moved to her hair releasing it, making the brown locks fall down her back. He caressed her nape while he kissed her and moved away slowly watching how she opened her eyes slowly.

“Did you like it?”

“The wine or the kiss?” she asked breathless and he sipped another bit of the liquid before kissing her again, his hand caressing the back of her neck.

He released her lips again and she watched him put the bottle on the table again.

“You really don’t like wine.”

“But I do like your kisses!” She hugged him and he kissed her again, still a faint taste of wine in his mouth but not enough to scare her away.

“Was that on your list?” Lillie asked caressing his cheek.

“Not really I just improvised!”

She pushed him playfully and laughed at his answer.

“So let’s do something from your list!”

She was so eager to pleasure him that he felt frustrated. He knew why she was acting like that and he didn’t like it at all. He was going to follow with his plan and make her feel special.

“I have one idea. It’s perfect since I didn’t have my desert!”

She frowned still upset with her clumsy ways.

“What idea?”

“I’m going to taste every inch of you!”

Lillie stared at him not knowing what to say while he looked down at her as if she was his.

“What do you mean?”

She knew what he meant, she wasn’t that stupid!

The corner of his lips moved up in a smirk and he kissed her nose.

“You are my desert and I bet you are very delicious!”

“Stop talking like that!” she stuttered embarrassed, her heart beating so much that she was afraid he would hear. She was burning already and he didn’t do anything to her yet, only the idea of him doing to her what she was thinking was making her very hot.

“Yes, I wrote on my list that I want to kiss you all over; trace and taste every inch of your skin. You are all the desert I need! There is nothing sweeter than you!”

His husky voice made her whimper and he held her waist, staring down at her and how her s would move every time she breathed, her s already hard under the dress making him harden somewhere else.

Lillie tried to stand up. It was important that she took that dress off but he gently pushed her down again.

“I will undress you, just relax! I’ll take care of you! Tonight you are my princess! I’ll make it memorable!”

The way he said it didn’t leave any room for discussion and she swallowed. Damn serious Jinki was such a turn on; and the way he called her princess. She felt so special!

 

When I lose my way inside the dark forest

When my young soul is crying

 

“But…I should be the one pleasuring you!” she said more to herself than him. It was his night.

“And you are. Believe me…you are. Just let me do what I want!”

That discussion was over.

Lillie bit her lip in expectation and watched Jinki move to the side, his hands grabbing her feet making her giggle.

He kissed her big toe and she tried to move it away, but he grabbed it strongly and kissed every one of her toes.

“There are much better places to kiss!” she said making him stare at her.

“I said I know what I am doing!”

He was so serious that she shut up immediately and watched him kiss up her feet to her ankle where he gave small butterfly kisses.

His hand slowly traveled up her leg while he kissed her skin, making her giggle and then accelerate her breathing. It felt good how his fingers touched her so gently, how his lips caressed her, how his tongue her.

He pulled her dress up when he reached her thighs and Lillie sat up so she could watch what he was doing.

Jinki kissed her inner thigh going up and Lillie lost all her strength falling on the bed again.

He was really going to do what she thought he would.

She swallowed her saliva, suddenly very dry, her blood pumping widely. He was going to kiss her there!

She felt him kiss her so close to her that she grabbed her dress waiting for the pleasure that would come.

However he didn’t. He looked up at her watching how her eyes looked at him in pleasure, how she bit her lip in expectation and how y she looked.

He pulled the dress up once again and started kissing her stomach, his fingers tracing her skin, touching the beauty spot she had near her bellybutton.

Lillie was a little disappointed, but she didn’t show it, instead she closed her eyes and raised her stomach to meet his lips halfway as she did before.

She felt his tongue her up to her s and his hand went under her and ped the dress slowly.

She raised her back so Jinki could pull it up and over her head.

He stared at her, now , with her s exposed. No bra! No wonder he could see her erect s. She did that to provoke him, he was certain.

“Heaven…I missed you both!” he mumbled making Lillie giggle.

“They missed you too!”

 That was the cute ert Jinki she missed on the last days. But soon he was back to the other Jinki, his fingers rubbing her s, his hand groping her s.

Lillie moaned and caressed his neck, pulling him to her chest. She wanted him to kiss her there and he didn’t take much time to fulfill her wishes.

 

Like a light, like a miracle, please guide me

Before this life ends

 

His mouth on one of her s, his teeth biting her softly making her go over the edge and moan, while his hand caressed the other one.

She couldn’t help but rub her hands on his back, pulling at his white shirt, regretting that he she didn’t undress him. She would love to touch his skin now.

After a while he moved to the other one, kissing the beauty mark next to her , his hands supporting his weight so he could concentrate on the task and she caressed the back of his head tenderly.

He moved away from her s and the expression on Lillie’s face was all the proof he needed to see that he did a good job. She was almost near her ; he knew all the signs already. It made him so proud that he could always tell when she was close.

Even if he couldn’t tell from her expression he could tell from her actions.

She moved her hands immediately to his shirt, quickly ing the buttons and kissing the exposed skin, leaving small hickeys down his chest. Jinki watched her, while she sat on the bed, desperately trying to undress him, her hair falling on her s has he predicted before. He softly brushed it away, curling her hair on his fingers and marveling at the woman in front of him, at the way her white silk skin was interrupted by the hickeys he did around her s before.

She was so damn beautiful and he couldn’t get enough of her. Making love with her would kill that thirst for a while but then it would triplicate and it was getting bigger and bigger. Damn he loved her so much and that guy was trying to ruin everything. How could he even hurt her?! How could anyone want to hurt someone like her?

After a while she gave up on his shirt and moved to his pants, frowning cutely and making him even more aroused.

“You could help me!” she complained breathing hard, her hands trembling over his , while she kissed one of the birthmarks on his chest.

He cupped her face, making her look at his face.

“I said I would take care of you and I haven’t finished tasting all of you!”

“I don’t think I can wait…please…”

She was begging! She was begging for him to take her! Damn!

He couldn’t help it; he crashed his lips into hers and kissed her hungrily while he made her lie on the bed again.

He never felt like that. Never! It was a need to have her, all of her, to reassure himself that he was the only one for her, that she wanted him and no one else.

He bit her lip making her yelp and his way down her neck to her s once again.

Lillie moaned and tried to move up again so she could attack him or plead or anything. She was so wet and she couldn’t help but move her legs wanting him to help her. He was taking so long and she was frustrated.

He kissed her stomach again biting her skin softly and Lillie gave up on waiting. She was going to sit up and pull him on top of her.

She didn’t have time to do anything because he grabbed the elastic of her black and pulled them down her legs.

FINALY! She thought opening her legs immediately so he could enter her and satisfy her and himself. Instead she saw him kneeling in the middle of her legs and bent his head down.

“OH MY GOD!” she screamed grabbing the purple sheets of her bed. He was kissing her…there! And it felt so good.

He grabbed her thighs for support and to make her stay still since she couldn’t stop moving her hips, and she felt like dying in sweet pleasure while he kissed her in that intimate way.

Soon she started moving her hands searching for something to hold one and she grabbed his hair.

“Jinki” she moaned his name several times, tangling her fingers in his soft brown hair, making him kiss her more deeply, answering to her prayers.

His hands grabbed her legs firmly and when she started shacking, ready to come he moved away.

 “No…” she whispered losing all her strength, her arms falling by her side.

She opened her eyes and saw Jinki looking down at her, his neatly combed hair was a mess now and she realized she was the one who did that.

“Sorry!” she mumbled confused, with her mind lost in pleasure. “Please!” she bit her lip begging him while she grabbed his wrist pulling him on top of her.

His expression didn’t change. The mysterious, dark Jinki stared at her, his eyes burning with desire making her even more aroused. Damn he looked hot!

He took his arm way from her hold and grabbed her by her knees pulling her closer to him.  

His fingers replaced his lips and he rubbed her answering to her request to pleasure her.

“Thank you!” Lillie mumbled with half closed eyes watching him, while his fingers entered her, marveling at how wet she was.

She started to buck up against his fingers, losing sense of anything, looking at him watching her. It was so y how his hair fell on his eyes giving him a dark hot aura.

Jinki smirked when he saw her move with more urgency and he his lips making her moan. He was the remains of her from his lips! Damn! He was doing that on purpose!

She hit her screaming, as he knew she would and he slowly moved his fingers until she was satisfied.

Lillie closed her eyes, exhausted, in front of him, showing all of her to him. But surprisingly she wasn’t embarrassed. It was awesome. She was his in every way. Lillie felt him take his fingers from inside her and she slowly opened her eyes.

“Are you ok?” he asked caressing her face. The sweet caring Jinki was back and she smiled satisfied. He was perfect!

“I can’t believe you did that!” she answered lazily, panting, still overwhelmed with what happened. It was awesome!

He did really taste her. It was so hot, so good…she needed to repay him now.

“I said I would! I wanted to taste you!” he answered laying by her side, caressing her stomach and admiring her body.

She noticed how he had half his shirt ed with his wonderful chest showing and the button of his pants was open. She didn’t finish undressing him!

Lillie also noticed something else on his pants and she wanted that even though she felt completely satisfied by now.

“I should repay you!” she tried to sit up but he pushed her down again.

“Not tonight!”

It needed to be tonight. There was no other night!

“But…”

“No!” he said once again, his hand going between her leg caressing her again and making her squirm in pleasure. She didn’t have a will to fight with him and he seemed so possessive and bossy. She liked that side of him! She wished he would take her roughly but at the same time she wanted him to be sweet with her, like the first time they were together.

“Now that my wish from the list was fulfilled let’s do something else!”

She watched him curiously and he positioned himself on top of her, ing his shirt and putting it away.

Then he moved to his pants and also took them while she watched him hungrily, her body still recovering from the .

He kneeled down on the middle of her legs once again and restarted caressing her making her move her hips up once again. Lillie sat up making him stop and placed her hands on his chest, slowly tracing his muscles and down his body to his , still covered by his underwear.

“Make love with me Jinki…please!”

 

When I get on my knees and cry before the world

When my feet stop inside the storm

If you alone are standing

Anything, pain or tears, I can withstand them all

 

He kissed her; grabbing her hands in his and making her lie down again. He took off his boxers and positioned himself down on top of her, kissing her lips slowly while she wrapped her legs around him.

“Always…” he said against her lips while he guided inside her, entering easily since she was so wet.

He moved slowly, enjoying how their skin rubbed against each other, how it felt to be inside her, watching her, trying to control his desire so it would last longer.

Lillie ruined everything when she kissed his shoulder, her hands caressing his s and he groaned fastening his pace.

How could he resist that? How could he last longer when her touch was so arousing?!

“You are close too!” she purred into his ear when he into her once again.

Jinki didn’t answer, instead looked down into her eyes, watching her open to moan while he caressed her , pulling her against him, penetrating her deeper.

“Who do you want?” he asked suddenly, kissing her neck. It was his insecurity kicking in but she was lost in pleasure so she didn’t think much of it.

However Lillie answered sincerely.

“You…only you!”

 

(All I want is you) All I want is you

(Only one is you) Only one is you in my life

 

“You are sweet…perfect!” he repeated several times, lost in pleasure and she hugged him wishing that could last forever.

There were no words to explain how she would miss that. It was not only the or the pleasure; it was so much more than that. She felt so complete and her feelings exploded inside her every time he made love with her. The things he always said and the way he would look at her during and after they make love. It was something too precious, something she knew she would never find again. It was fireworks, a one in a life time experience, something unrepeatable.

 Like penguins finding their partner.

 

I won’t cry, I won’t cry again

Absolutely nothing

can stop me

But only one person

 

That was what hurt the most. She knew she would never find someone to love as she loved him.

Once again he made her hit her , the rush of adrenaline invading her body, making her see white; but this time she didn’t scream, she kissed his shoulder, hugging him against her chest, tears coming to her eyes.

He came almost immediately, losing his strength and falling on top of her with a grunt.

They stayed like that, hugging each other and Jinki started to feel something wet on his neck. She was crying and he knew why.

He used his elbows to move up and look at her making her cover her eyes immediately.

“Shush…my love!”

Lillie whimpered and he pulled her hands away kissing her eyes softly.

“Don’t cry!” he said with a weak voice cleaning the tears away.

Jinki kissed her lips trying to erase the sobs, while he slowly moved out from inside her.

“I’m sorry!” she apologized. Sorry for leaving him, sorry for being so weak and not being able to protect what they had.

 

You make me, you complete me

Oh, you make me able to breath like this

 

He pulled her to his arms, making her rest her head on the crook of his neck.

“it’s ok…stop crying!” he caressed her back, whispering calming words, kissing her lips, eyes, anywhere, trying to make her stop.

“Pretty zoo….don’t cry!” he kissed her nose again and she smiled slightly, snuggling on his sweaty chest.

“Don’t rub me too much or I’ll get hard again!”

His comment made her giggle like only he could do. Actually that thought was not that bad. Make love with him all night...she wouldn’t mind even though she would probably end up very sore.

“That seems like a good plan!” she sniffled caressing his chest and he chuckled.

“Ok. Let’s do it then! Just don’t fall asleep in my arms! Someone needs to blow the candles out!”

“Blow them now; we can still make love in the dark!”

He kissed her nose again and stood up from the bed moving to blow the candles one by one. She watched him , moving around the room and she couldn’t help but feel that he was blowing their memories away each time he would blow one candle, making the room darker, like her life would be without him.

Jinki finished the task and returned to bed pulling her to his arms once again, caressing her back while she pulled the covers over them.

“I can still see you!” he said looking at her, inches from her face, his hand caressing her face and hair.

“I can see you too!”

“Good…because you can never run away from me!” the choice of words made her flinch but he pretended not to notice. “I’ll be here watching you until you fall asleep and when you open your eyes I’ll be here too.”

“You promise?” she asked touching his cheek, forgetting about the and everything. Now she only wanted to sleep on his arms.

“I do. Sleep peacefully Lillie, I’ll take care of you! I’ll be here when you open your eyes.”

And he would keep his promise.

 

When I get on my knees and cry before the world

When my feet stop inside the storm

If you alone are standing

I can handle this much pain and suffering

 

 

It didn’t surprise her to see him there in front of her, in the middle of the airport. She knew he would have a change of heart and would come to say goodbye to her.

“I knew you would come!” Yun said staring at the man with the sunglasses, worn out jeans and a black t-shirt.

“I’m sorry how I acted last time.” Taemin apologized and she wished she could see his eyes behind the glasses.

“It’s ok. You were hurt. I can understand that!”

They stood there staring at each other not knowing what to say even thought there was so much to say.

“Wish me luck!” she asked playing with the bag on her hand.

“I sincerely wish that you accomplish everything you dream off.”

“I wish the same for you. I want you to be really happy! I’ll be checking on you and spreading SHINee music!”

Taemin nodded and Yun played with the bag once again.

“I will…” “I’ll never…”

Both spoke at the same time and Taemin gestured for her to speak first.

“I will never forget you! You are a very special person.”

He stared at her and opened his mouth a few times before he gained courage to speak.

“I’ll never forget you Melody. You are my first love.”

A voice announced that the gates were open and Yun grabbed her bag from the floor.

“It’s my time to go! “

“Can I kiss you? A last time?” He asked blushing and Yun stepped in his direction, standing on her tiptoes so she could kiss him.

It was short but very sweet.

“Maybe someday we can see each other again!” she smiled sweetly caressing his cheek and then turned around grabbing her bag.

He watched her and she turned around once again.

“Can I see your eyes?”

He took his sunglasses off and she waved at him smiling. He tried to smile too also waving at her, wishing she couldn’t see the red eyes he was hiding behind his glasses.

She did see them and turned around after a while letting him put the glasses on again.

Taemin watched her until she disappeared inside the gate and turned around.

That was how Taemin first love ended.

 

(If only you) If only you

(Are with me) Are with me

When I get on my knees and cry before the world

When my feet stop inside the storm

If you alone are standing

Anything, pain or tears, I can withstand them all

 

 

 

Two days. That’s what was left for Lillie to spend in Korea. She still hasn’t decided if she was going to see Jinki again before going but she wanted to kiss him one more time.

She dragged her feet inside the norembang staring at the time on her phone.

Alex was waiting for her. He called her that morning, threatening her to meet him there.

It was stupid how he believed she would actually sing and have fun with him. She did come because he threatened her but this time she was prepared.

Lillie opened the door to the norembang room he was at and he greeted her from the couch.

She closed the door behind her, telling herself it was only a few hours and soon she would be away from him.

“You came!”

He didn’t seem surprised.

“I did, but I’m not going to stay. I don’t feel like singing.”

Alex ignored her comment. “You should have dressed up. It’s a date after all!”

The simple navy blue t-shirt and blue jeans showed him that she did exactly the opposite.

“This is the last time I’ll meet you. I won’t cheat on Jinki.”

She has decided. It was only two more days anyway…

He stood up and the music even though no one was going to sing.

Nightmare, SHINee song, the bastard!

“Nice song! I like it!”

“Turn it off!” she said crossing her arms over her chest and leaning on the door.

Onew voice came out from the columns and Alex imitated him sing making her burn in anger.

“TURN THAT OFF!”

“Why? You love it!” He walked slowly around the couch and she watched him carefully afraid of what he would do. The song was probably to muffle the sound. He was clever. No one would listen if she screamed inside that room.

“I don’t see why though. He isn’t that talented you know…”

“You don’t know a thing about him!”

“I do. He doesn’t even have a solo album and sometimes he looks a little….dumb!”

“Your words won’t hurt me cos they are not true!” she said avoiding Alex eyes and trying to calm herself. He was trying to hurt her.

Alex knew she was certain about Onew success and qualities so he moved to someone else, someone she wasn’t so sure about having qualities.

“I wonder how a guy like him convinced a frigid girl like you to sleep with him!”

Lillie covered her ears.

“IM NOT LISTENING!” she screamed over the music, praying he would stop.

“I want to learn from him! Cos god knows how I tried touching you. You were like an ice cube staring at me as if I was torturing you. Not y at all…I wonder what he sees on you…”

“STOP!”

“You are not that beautiful, your body is ok but nothing special and damn sometimes you are so annoying. And I’m not going to even mention the fact that you don’t do anything well.”

She closed her eyes trying to ignore him and grabbed the door handle to open it and go away.

“If you do that I’ll be upset Lillie!”

She released the door and he kept going.

“You don’t even know how to cook. You are not that smart. And let’s face it there is nothing you can offer him. I bet he is with you because you are easy and do whatever he wants. In the end it’s all about !”

“It’s not that! He loves me!”

Nightmare ended and he played with the remote control and choose Everybody this time.

“He loves ing you! That’s all. Lillie see the truth! I’m the only one who loves you!”

She covered her ears again.

“NO!”

He kept talking and the sound of the music mixed with his voice making her boil. She couldn’t think clearly. Alex approached her and she could only see his lips moving.

“…no one will ever love you! That only wants you in bed. That’s why he doesn’t come clear about your relationship. That’s why it’s a secret!” he stood in front of her, her eyes burning with hate. She wanted to kill him. She never hated someone so much in her life. She could kill him; before leaving her house she took a pocket knife with her; it was on her bag. She only needed to take it out and do it. But she couldn’t…she wasn’t that kind of person.

“Lillie you are mine! Leave that bastard!”

Jinki wasn’t a bastard and when she realized, Lillie slapped Alex.

The sound of her hand hitting his face seemed to be louder than the music and she looked at him appalled. She never hit him. Ever! It was so new to her but it felt so wonderful to stand up for herself and whom she loved.

She didn’t have much time to feel wonderful because he pulled her arm making her step away from the door and punched her on her right cheek.

Lillie fell with the impact, her side hitting the edge of the small table in front of the couch.

She whimpered in pain while he looked down at her.

“NOW SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO!”

She didn’t look up at him and touched her lip, noticing how her fingers come bloody. Her face hurt so much and her back was aching too. Lillie needed the pocket knife to threaten him and get out from there.

She was going to open the bag when he pulled it from her arm and threw it to the other side of the room.

“Are you going to call your boyfriend?” he asked running a hand through his hair, groaning.

“I didn’t want to hit you! It was your fault! You are bleeding!” he walked around the room mumbling and Lillie tried to get up.  He turned Everybody on again and she used that opportunity to grab the couch and the table to help her stand up. That’s when she noticed a glass with whisky on the table. She grabbed it, ready to throw it at him but he noticed in the last minute grabbing her arm and twisting it, making the liquid fall over her.

She screamed in pain and the glass fell on the floor, over the carpet.

“You need a lesson!” he said in hatred pulling her to the couch. She kneeled on the floor, making herself heavy but he was stronger and dragged her all over the way to the couch.

Alex grabbed her waist and she screamed and tried to kick him, her hands closed into fists, but he still pulled her over to his arms and threw her to the couch. Lillie tried to move right away but he climbed on top of her and pinned her down, grabbing her arms.

She raised her knee but couldn’t hit him, however it was enough for him to release her arm a little and she took the opportunity to hit his face with all her strength.

Unfortunately she wasn’t that strong and he slapped her again, making her bit her tongue and swallow blood.

Lillie was confused now. The last blow made her blink in pain and she took a time to recover from the hit, white sparkles clouding her vision.

He used the opportunity to her pants and she cried knowing what he intended to do.

She dreamed with that. He was going to finish what he didn’t on the night she decided to run away. Alex was going to her.

She felt him pull her pants slightly down, having a hard time because she wasn’t helping him and he grabbed her knees opening her legs so he could fit in the middle of hers. She resisted and tried to take his hands away from her body but he once again grabbed her wrist, hurting her on the exact same spot he did hurt her on the day of the Han River “date”.

Lillie whimpered when his fingers grasped her wrist but she cried even more when he crushed his lips against hers.

She couldn’t endure that and there was only a way to end it. She opened letting him stick his tongue inside her and she took the opportunity to bit his lip making him move away and curse because of the pain.

“!” he screamed touching his lip and Lillie took the opportunity to sit up.

His lip was bleeding just like hers and she tried to move from under him. However she wasn’t quick enough and he pulled her down on the couch again, pulling her t-shirt up.

She fought with Alex to stop him but once again he won when he grabbed her arm over her head.

“Finally we are going to have !” he said against her ear making her shut her eyes in disgust.

He kissed her neck and she couldn’t help but whimper. That was the spot Jinki loved to kiss. Alex was dirtying it; his lips moved down to her collarbone, while his free hand d her s.

She felt dirty, used, she wanted to die.

No! She wanted to live but she didn’t have any strength left to fight. All her body was hurting and there was no use in screaming. Everybody ended and silence filled the room. The only sound was Alex heavy aroused breathing against her skin while he touched her s roughly.

It was over.

Then something weird happened. Alex suddenly released her and his weight disappeared from over her. Lillie opened her eyes and she didn’t saw Alex looking at her. She saw Jinki.

Just like he promised!

“I’ll be here when you open your eyes!”

At first she thought she imagined it but when she closed and opened her eyes again she saw that Jinki was the one who pulled Alex from over her. His eyes were deadly and he wasn’t looking at her, he was looking at the other man.

Jinki was really on that room.

Lillie heart was filled with relief and happiness to see him until, she realized what that meant.

He saved her, he didn’t look happy and finally Alex and Jinki met.

 

 (All I want is you) All I want is you

(Only one is you) Only one is you in my life

 

Ok dont hit me! Im ready for opinions. I know this is a lot more darker and y than my other chapters but yeah....I decided to try something diferent.

I needed to show how much Lillie changed so she needed to actualy "fight" with Alex. Not in really fight but stand up for herself. And she did try! But we needed hero Jinki...cos that makes ur heart go crazy! ahahah

Sorry for the almost scene. That was what made her run away so I thought it fited. Also That was necessary to make deadly jinki come out from his closet. cof cof

Also I needed to show how much more brave Lillie is in bed and how dark Jinki can be when he is jealous and upset.

I hope people could notice how diferent he was in this chapter.

And liked the angst and stuff...

Ah Taemin. Well since the very begining I had another plans for Taemin so Yun was something that i wasnt expecting to happen. But it was important, it made Taemin grow up and I promise he will have a happy ending. 

Damn I think to much about this stuff. ahahahah

Sorry I just spend a lot of time inside my fics! 

Anyway, comments, upvotes and stuff...

song: http://youtu.be/dLxqqb18rvs