A,N: This chapter was rewritten and some plot changes were made!

3 2 1 let’s go, no more holding back

Me who’s timid all of a sudden gets fired up, I want to make that girl see only me

Lillie opened her eyes and the first thing she saw was Jinki’s body pressed against hers, his collarbones, and his Adam apple. It wasn’t a dream and she truly told him everything. He accepted her as she was and she fell asleep in his arms.

Lillie tried to get up a little to see what time it was but he muttered something pulling her back to him making her almost collide with his chest. He was so close, closer than ever, and smelled so good, so clean and safe like fresh clean sheets. Lillie touched him gently, feeling his muscles under her fingertips trying not to wake him up. She shouldn’t be doing that, taking advantage of their proximity and his state of unconsciousness to touch him but that was almost like a dream come true. Like a fluttering caress, she traced his adam’s apple which made him mutter something inaudible again. Scared that he might wake up, Lillie pulled her naughty fingers away.

Slowly, Lillie moved from under his arm that was wrapped around her and sat up on the bed. She blinked her eyes and allowed herself to study her surroundings. It was already getting dark outside and the house seemed to be in total silence. A few hours earlier she thought that her life as Jinki’s girlfriend was ending and now, after a long nap that took the whole afternoon, she was still sharing her bed and life with him.

She wondered why Jules didn't wake them up? They skipped lunchtime and she was starving and Jinki, even though he needed the rest, was probably famished too.

Lillie looked down at the blond man lying beside her and she couldn't stop the whirlwind of loving feelings storming up inside her. Lee Jinki was sleeping in her bedroom, in her bed, his hand that was a few minutes before on her back was now laying on the place she left empty on the pillow. It wasn't the first time she saw him sleep, she did before on tv on a variety show but that was the first time she saw him truly sleep, out of a show and his famous life, out of a tv screen, and he looked extremely calm.

Lillie laid down over him without touching, watching him closely. He wasn't perfect, no one was but he looked the closest to what a perfect man could be, at least in her opinion. His furry eyebrows that were usually so expressive were motionless, resting over his closed eyes. His eyelashes weren’t as long as they usually looked, probably related to makeup, his hair was wilder than usual, falling on the pillow, blonde against the purple of her pillow sheet. He inhaled deeply and her eyes fell on his chest. His arms were muscular, more than she ever noticed before, maybe because he always covered himself the most in SHINee.

She wanted to touch him, to explore his body under his clothes, a thought that was so new to her that left her blushing. And more than her dirty thoughts she wanted to tell everyone, the whole world, that she loved him. It was almost unfair how he was capable of making her feel so hopelessly in love with him. It only made her more insecure to be loved by someone like him. When he was like that, so perfect, handsome, and talented it only made her feel more like the opposite. How could she ever be at his level?!

Suddenly he the bed staying with his stomach up. She moved back startled watching him while he ran a hand over his chest and up to his head. He ruffled his hair scratching the side of it and let his arm stay falling back over his head on the pillow.

He didn't open his eyes or made any more gestures that showed that he had woken so Lillie leaned down again, closer, to check on him.

“Hum no..” He mumbled scrunching his nose adorably.

Lillie watched him curiously wondering what he was dreaming about and moved closer placing her hands carefully on each side of him over the mattress.

"No. It's mine..." he kept muttering oblivious to her proximity and the way she was admiring him. His lips were slightly parted and she wanted to kiss him. She could kiss him, he was her boyfriend after all but she rarely was the one who took the initiative, not only because desires like that were new to her and she was inexperienced but because she always walked on eggshells around her ex-boyfriend. Being spontaneous and taking the lead wasn't something that came easily to her.

Lillie closed her eyes for a few seconds and when she opened them Jinki’s eyes were open and staring back at her.

She quickly scooped back fidgeting her hands on the covers underneath her. She felt exposed as if she was caught doing something she shouldn't have.

“I wasn't trying to take advantage of you…” She explained, her cheeks getting hot “You were saying something in your sleep and I was curious.”

Jinki sat up on the bed rubbing his eye.

“Relax Lillie, you are talking too fast.”

“Sorry.”

He yawned and finally took a good look at her. Her hair was a mess and her cheeks were red and not long ago she was laying over him looking at his lips. He wished he was faster and caught her in his arms and kissed her but she moved away as if she was doing something wrong not giving him a chance.

"You were only admiring the beauty of your boyfriend! No problem! " he cheekily remarked and Lillie rose from the bed and pulled the pillow with his face from above the closet throwing it at him.

He chuckled, protecting his face.

"I was only comparing you with the pillow!" Lillie turned and looked at herself in the mirror of her closet. Usually, her after sleep appearance didn't bother her but now she was with Jinki, her boyfriend and she looked completely horrible, far from the proper lady she wanted to look in his eyes.

"Do you know what I was dreaming right now?" he asked with an adorable sleepy voice rotating the pillow with his finger as if he was in a talent contest on tv.

Lillie loosened her hair that was half caught on a hairband, trying to look less unattractive, and looked at him.

"Ahh..." he swallowed hard and dropped the pillow from his finger staring at her. To him, and even though she had no idea, she was beautiful. She had an honest and warm smile, a cute small nose, and well-drawn lips that he loved to kiss. Lillie had an innocent aura that made him want to protect her. His type was usually the y one but Lillie shattered it. She made him laugh and she could be cute and adorable and warm him inside and at the same time be a stubborn fool that baffled him with her insecurities. He couldn't help but let his eyes wander down her body. Her s seemed like the right size to fill his hands, full and perfect and her body was curvier than of his ex-girlfriends. He wanted to hold her, he wanted her.

"What did you dream about?" She asked when he stopped talking.

"Food! I dreamed that Minho stole my dinner!"

She laughed sending him a dashing smile and he smoothly smiled back.

"I get it! I'm ordering pizza for dinner!"

We are burning up burning up, I want that girl so much

(Hey) God, please (Hey) If you let me win this race (Hey) I won’t wish for anything anymore

(Hey) So God, please (Hey) Choose me (Hey) My love is bang bang burning up

Bang bang burning up bang bang burning up

Jules was sitting on the couch wrapped in a blanket watching TV with a cup of hot tea in her hand when Lillie left the room picking up her hair into a ponytail.

"Oh, good evening sleeping beauty. Where is the prince?"

"Inside! Why didn’t you wake us?"

Jules smirked. She made coffee and waited for them but they never left the room so she approached the door and listened but didn’t hear anything inside. They couldn't have left without passing by her in the living room, therefore they were still in Lillie’s bedroom. She called for her friend softly but no one answered. A little apprehensive, Jules opened the door, peeked inside, and saw both embraced in bed, unfortunately still dressed. They were so cute that she couldn't wake them. Actually, she even took a picture to show Lillie later.

"I didn’t feel like it!"

"Where did you put that pizza restaurant's number that I love?" Lillie asked not to insist more on the subject.

"Fridge! Look, it’s your boyfriend on TV!"

Lillie grabbed the card with the number and ran to the couch. The show on tv was the one she SHINee recorded. It was weird to see the same thing but from a different angle. But most importantly, she knew SHINee would perform soon, the performance she missed because she was sulking in jealousy and insecurity at the time. While she ordered a pizza she watched the show with Jules, this time intended on not losing a second of that performance.

She was motionless with her eyes on the tv for a while when she realized that she completely forgot about the real Jinki, alone, waiting for her in the bedroom.

Lillie rose from the couch and touched Jules' shoulder “Call us when the pizza arrives!"

"Yes...if you can stop making bunnies for ten minutes!" Jules answered back.

"I heard that!" Lillie yelled before entering her bedroom.

Jinki was on the bed with Dubu in front of him. His hair was a mess which made him look even more boyish and adorable.

"So hear me carefully, I’ll be the one to sleep with her for now on!” he whispered to the soft toy.

"What are you doing?" Lillie asked before sitting at the end of the bed. She opened the stream of the show on her phone to watch it.

"Threatening this tokki to not try to steal my girlfriend!" Jinki answered before shifting closer to her to check what she was watching.

"See! You’re on TV!" Lillie said excitedly, raising her phone to his eye level.

He smirked and instead of looking at the phone screen, he looked at her. It was much more interesting to see her smile, with her eyes shining. Until a few hours ago she had been crying. Her eyes were still puffy, but now she was grinning, feeling better. And all he had to do was to hear her out, to hold her. When she told him about the abuse she endured he felt powerless but now it was the opposite. He felt like he could do anything as long as it was for her, to make her smile like that.

Jinki dropped the plushie and sat behind her, hugging her waist. Lillie didn’t say anything but he felt her tense up. It wasn't the first time he hugged her like that but he knew that the situation now was different. They were sitting on her bed, alone in her bedroom, and after what she shared with him hours before things felt different between them. Not in a bad way, just more intense and serious. On top of that, she was wearing way fewer clothes and he was too. Jinki was sure she could feel the outline of his muscles because he also felt her body perfectly.

"Oh," he said resting his chin on her bare shoulder, his hair tickling her neck.

Colorful came out from her phone and Jinki realized that SHINee’s performance started. Lillie sighed deeply liking the surprise, the one she missed because she had run away before they sang.

"I look different on TV!" Jinki confessed. It still felt weird to see himself like that.

"Why?" She asked relaxing under his strong embrace.

"Look at me! I’m cool!"

"But you're always cool!"

"You say that because you're my girlfriend!" he rubbed his nose on her cheek, closing his eyes and she did not tense up which made him smile. Lillie didn’t fear him, and by the way, she acted recently around him she liked his caresses, his proximity.

"No, I say that because I have eyes on my face and very good taste!"

He kissed her shoulder and held her against him laying his head on it.

"My girlfriend is so cute!"

Lillie was overwhelmed with all the demonstrations of love. Not only was he holding her but he was also kissing and touching her tenderly and whispering sweet praises on her ears.

She stopped the stream on her phone and turned to face him. Jinki looked at her curiously.

"Okay, time to talk!" Lillie announced and he raised one eyebrow.

"Talk?"

"Yeah, about what happened this morning!"

"I think there’s not much to talk about, Lillie! I told you what I had to say! Nothing changes between us! If he comes for you I'll be by your side!” That was obvious to him.

Lillie crossed her legs over the bed and looked down at the covers as if she was debating what to do next. "There's something else you need to know!"

"There is?!” He wasn't sure he could survive another dark secret from her past. It still upset him how he had no control over how much she suffered. How he couldn't erase it. Now there was something else.

"It’s stupid, but I think you should know! No more secrets!” Lillie bit her lower lip and Jinki widened his eyes waiting “You know my co-worker...”

"The one from the other day?" If he did something to her too Jinki would lose it.

"Yes! He is hitting on me!"

"What! What did he do?”

"Nothing special, just trying to flirt with me. He doesn’t talk much with me now! I think he is embarrassed because I freaked out on him last time!"

“Freaked out?” Jinki rubbed his temple and she feared she was pressuring him too much by telling him everything on the same day.

“Nothing special…” She didn't want to talk about Alex again and how scared she still was of him that made her act weird around another man. Other men besides Jinki.

"He should be embarrassed! Hitting on girls with boyfriends!” Jinki stated in a lighter tone, from what she was grateful.

"Don’t you remember that we are dating in secret?! He doesn’t know I have a boyfriend!"

"Oh." Jinki almost forgot it. He hated that, not being able to tell everyone that he was dating her knowing that she was out there "single" with other men looking at her.

Lillie leaned closer and when he realized she was kissing him. It was a short kiss different from the intense ones they shared before.

“It doesn’t matter! I’ll tell him and everyone that I am in love with someone else."

"Hum, not quite the same thing!" Was he feeling insecure?

"A fantastic y man, who has so many women around him that he doesn’t look at me! Oh, what a sad life! " Lillie ended with a dramatic tone and Jinki chuckled.

They looked at each other for a while and he tentatively moved closer to her.

"But I do look at you! I can’t take my eyes off of you!"

She made a funny face out of embarrassment trying to make him laugh but he only smiled and winked back at her. It was almost her defeat but she held it in and instead looked away and back at him again.

At that moment he his lips and she had that overwhelming need to kiss him again "T-that is cheating! "

He laughed tilting his head before pulling her by her neck to his lips. They kissed slowly with no rush, small sweet caresses of their lips on each other until his tongue entered and she realized that things were heating up.

Lillie placed her hands on his chest and like she wished moved them down over his tank top, feeling his muscles underneath. He moaned appreciatively but didn’t let go of her lips. Their tongues danced while his hand slid down her back joining the other that was there already.

They were kissing like that day on the stairs and nothing else mattered to them.

She grabbed his tank top tightly and started taking it off of him. He broke the kiss breathing fast and stared at her intently. Lillie wasn't sure what she was doing anymore but she was certain that if they made love she wouldn't regret it at all. But she wasn't sure he wanted the same she did so she waited for his reaction.

His eyes were dark with desire and he didn't say anything, instead, he helped her get his tank top off leaving his upper body bare.

Her heart raced while she admired him. Jinki was perfect! He wasn't overly muscled but he was fitted and above else she didn't feel scared seeing him like that. With Alex, in one of the many times he undressed in front of her, that he made her touch him, he felt overpowering, scary, and...she didn't want to think about him, not while she was with Jinki.

She took a deep breath and placed her hand over his chest. He was warm and real and was looking at her intensely, watching her but it didn't leave her frightened, it excited her instead. Lillie explored his chest, moving down to his abs, and the side over his ribs, she touched his stomach and up to the other side of his chest. When her finger brushed his he tensed up and she looked up worried that she might have done something wrong but the pure look of need and love in his eyes showed that it was the opposite. She was doing everything right, so right he was aroused.

"Lillie? Are you sure?" His voice was rougher than usual and only made her pulse quicken. "We can wait a little longer! With everything that happened..."

"No! I want this!” She wasn't sure how she would react during it but she never wanted something that much.

"I want it too, but I don't want you to feel pressured! I want it to make sense!"

She knew what he meant. Lillie was not going to have with him only to prove to herself that she could be attracted to a man or to take revenge on Alex...No! She loved him. It had to be with him. It made no sense to wait if she was sure of it.

"But it does! It’s you and I love you!"

That seemed to seal the deal because he kissed her again but this time pulled her to him, making her sit almost on his lap.

She kissed his cheek and down to his chin almost hesitantly and he slipped his hands under her top caressing her stomach. Since she didn't ask him to stop and continued kissing him down to his neck he moved his hands up to her s. He caressed her over her bra and she took a sharp breath, their eyes meeting. There was no fear in hers and he caressed her again, happy that she was alright with it. He wanted to do that for a long time. She was beautiful and he couldn't wait to undress her, to see her , to kiss her insecurities and fears away.

She closed her eyes and kissed him and he answered passionately, his body wanting more, and by the way she clung to him, she also wanted it desperately. He caressed her down to her stomach again and pulled her top up. Breaking the kiss he undressed her leaving her only in her bra. Her cheeks were pink and her skin was warm and inviting as much as her lips. He swallowed hard, desire shooting through him directly to the middle of his legs and he slowly slid one finger under one of the straps of her bra before sliding it down her arm. She breathed faster and he did the same to the other one before kissing her shoulder and pulling her closer against his chest.

“Are you alright?” He wasn't sure how to do that. It wasn't as if he didn't know how you do but he was afraid to be too eager to not be able to read her well, to completely ruin the moment and do something wrong, letting his desire rule over all else.

“Yes.” She whispered closing her eyes, her heart beating faster with the proximity and because he was kissing her neck. Something wet touched her skin and she realized it was his tongue and it was so y her core ached with need. Lillie was aroused and it was such a refreshing feeling after what she felt with Alex touch that she was bubbling with happiness.

He pulled away and his eyes wandered down her body to her chest. She followed his gaze until she realized she was wearing one of her plain old bras. It wasn't as if she had y lingerie but at least she could have been wearing something newer and less boring than a white bra.

“I don't really have…” She started embarrassed and he listened to her attentively, his caress on her shoulder and down to where her bra straps had fallen distracted her. “Nice underwear.”

He shook his head, the idea never crossing his mind. He didn't care about what she was wearing because he wanted to take it all from her. What mattered was underneath. He kissed her shoulder again and hugged her once again. This time his kisses started at her neck and moved up to her ear. She sighed starting to feel wet between her legs, wondering how something like that was possible with only a few caresses. Wondering if maybe she was waiting for that all her life, for someone to come and love her and wake up the woman inside her.

"Lillie, you are beautiful!" he whispered against her ear. He knew she was nervous, he was too. It was all new to him also and he had to tell her.

He was a man with needs after all. He could be seen as the picture of innocence by his fans, but he was a man like any other. He looked at women's bodies, he desired them, he watched sometimes too.

But that was different, not only because it felt different, real, and meaningful but also because he didn't want to mess it up. He couldn’t mess it up, and for that, Jinki had to be honest with her before it happened.

Her s against his chest were making him go crazy and he still hadn’t taken her bra off. What feeling was that that blended with desire made him so lost and at the same time made so much sense?! He had thought he had loved someone romantically before but maybe he was wrong.

She kissed his cheek and his back gently, almost afraid that something was wrong and Jinki fought the urge to say a joke, something he often did when he was feeling nervous.

"Jinki?" she asked, her insecurity coming in her voice.

He pulled away from her and bit his lip.

“Do you want to stop?” She asked, surprising him. The last thing he wanted was to stop. He desperately wanted to kiss her, hold her and be inside her. God he couldn't wait to love her.

“No, no, of course not.” He caressed her cheek and she leaned against his touch in such a perfect way that his chest ached as much as his need for her. “There is something I need to tell you.”

He was embarrassed and she blinked her eyes confused.

"I'm not as popular as you think! I’m not talking about shawols! I’m talking about women!"

“It’s alright. It's not like I need to know with how many you dated or…”

“That's the thing…” He cleared his throat. “I’ve only had two serious girlfriends and I never went too far with them.” His ears became deep red and Lillie slowly started to realize what he meant.

Jinki was a . That was something she never thought would be possible. He always seemed to have way more experience than her, in the way he kissed and touched her. It didn't matter to her. She had wondered about his girlfriends before but now surprisingly, in that moment of intimacy, sitting in front of each other semi- it didn't seem to matter at all. He was embracing all of her scars and she would embrace all of his. It was almost meant to be. She wanted it to be. Besides in a way it made sense. He was always so busy that he didn't have much time left to date.

“I don't care.” She her lips and touched his fingers, sliding hers between his over the bed.”It doesn't matter.”

But he cared, he wanted it to be perfect and was afraid to ruin everything. He was a total disaster on so many things, a clumsy mess sometimes and she deserved the best after what she endured. Her first time needed to be perfect.

As if she read his thoughts Lillie smiled and leaned forward and kissed him again, her hand squeezing his.

While they kissed it became clear to both. It was going to be even more special. They would be each other's first, they would make mistakes and be awkward together but nothing of it mattered as long as they were in it together.

He broke the kiss and joined his forehead with hers.

"This way we'll do it together." He voiced out their deepest feelings and Lillie grinned because maybe it was meant to be the two of them since the beginning.

"We will be each other's first!"

"Yes!" Jinki smiled before kissing her, his hands groping her s again.

A small moan escaped her lips but he didn't stop, his hands sliding up to her back going up to her bra clasp. He groaned against her lips frustrated trying to unclasp it and she smiled against his lips.

She put her hands on his chest feeling his s under her fingers and made ​​an effort to push him away from her.

"Sorry," he mumbled, seeing her reach her back to unclasp her bra. He needed to figure out how that thing worked but they would have time for that.

"HEY! Pizza is here!" Jules knocked on the door startling them "You didn’t hear the doorbell! You must be sooooo busy! "She mischievously chuckled.

Lillie held her bra against her s and then clasped it again but not without noticing Jinki’s disappointment. He forced a smile and looked down at his lap. Without Lillie realizing what was happening he pulled the pillow with his face from the ground covering his lap with it.

"I said I was paying, but I think you have to do it!" He announced.

"Why?"

He looked down at the pillow on his lap and at her again clenching his teeth.

"I think I got a little….excited!”

"Oh dubulge!" She covered widening her eyes realizing that she had just used the name the fandom called Jinki’s bulge. She didn't think and by the way Jinki reacted blushing deeply he knew what she was talking about.

"Yeah..."

That also meant that Jinki had an . Lillie, that had always felt like she was unable to make a man desire her, had just been the cause of his . Weirdly it gave her a wicked satisfaction. Jinki wanted her.

Without a word and barely looking at him afraid to see more than she should she stood up and put on her hoodie.

"I'm going!" she informed him.

"My wallet is on the table."

"No! I can pay! You pay next time! "

"I'm sorry!"

She got out of the room closing the door behind her and then took a moment to gather her thoughts and feelings.

Her heart was beating fast and she almost had with Jinki. They kissed, they opened their hearts to each other and Jinki desired her as a woman, or at least he was very ually frustrated. He did say he was a . Well, she was a too and she was definitely aroused. However, she was sure she was like that not because she has never been with someone but because she wanted him because she loved him.

Lillie never thought she would ever say that in her life but she truly hated pizza now!

Move forward bang bang we heat up quite a lot

Don’t miss your chance for love, we are burning up burning up

(Hey) Oh my baby (Hey) If I win this race (Hey) I’ll be on cloud 9

(Hey) Oh my baby (Hey) Choose me (Hey) My love is bang bang burning up

Lillie paid for the pizza and was grabbing a bottle of coke from the fridge when Jules leaned against the kitchen counter watching her with a knowing smile.

“Your skin is flushed.”

Lillie pressed the palms of her hands against her cheeks blaming her fair skin for not being able to hide her feelings.

“It must be from the heat.” She tried to find an excuse. "It's a little warm in my room.”

“Oh, I bet it is.” Jules nudged her arm and moved closer “So? Did something happen? I know you slept in each other's arms.”

“H-how do you…”

“I peeked inside the room to see if you two were still alive. You weren't leaving the bedroom and no sound came out.” Jules bit her lower lip excited “So did you have ?"

“No!” Lillie stepped back stumbling against the fridge. “Stop it, it's embarrassing.”

Jules chuckled “God you two are so slow.” She grabbed her friend by the shoulders “Lillie you love that man and he loves you. If you are ready don't let the chance to be with the one you want to slip by!”

Lillie slowly nodded and Jules released her, her eyes shining bright. Lillie grabbed the pizza and the bottle of coke and Jules pushed her lightly out of the kitchen.

“Go for it!”

Lillie’s legs got weaker and she felt lightheaded but Jules was right and that night she was going to lose her ity with Jinki.

Jinki took a deep breath and tried to calm down. It was embarrassing how quickly he got into that state, only after a few kisses and caresses. It was true that men got aroused fast, sometimes in the most embarrassing moments. It was often that he woke up with an , still, when he was trying to go slow with the woman he loved, his body didn't seem to have the same idea.

Lillie was special and he couldn't blame his body for wanting her that badly. He closed his hand into a fist remembering the way her skin felt against his fingers. She was so soft, her lips were warm and the way she touched his chest was extremely .

“…” Jinki couldn't stop thinking of her and what he wanted to do to her and he had to stop because if he didn't that wouldn't go away. His phone rang and he stretched out to pick it from the bedside table.

"Yes?"

"Where are you?" Jonghyun asked.

He checked the time on his phone and froze. Falling asleep with Lillie after the conversation they had and waking up by her side completely made him forget the world outside. And in less than an hour, they had to leave for a company dinner party. Occasionally the company would do these dinners to promote the friendship between the groups and at the same time let the trainers showcase their talents. It was mandatory and he didn't have much time to cross town to get to the restaurant.

"Ahh, I think I forgot!"

Jinki looked down and raised the pillow a little to look at the growing tent on his pants. He really wouldn't be able to go out in that state.

"Hum! I see! " Jonghyun chuckled. “Anyway, hurry up!”

"I think I'll be a little late!"

"Late?” Jonghyun took a deep breath. “Alright, but Kibum is waiting for you. You asked him to help you choose an outfit, remember?”

“Ah right, yeah….I’ll be there as fast as I can.” As soon as he managed to make his body obey him.

“Good luck! You don't want to face the wrath of Bummie!”

“No, I don't.” But there wasn't much he could do. He probably would have to tell Kibum the reason why he was late and be the target of teasing for the rest of the night.

Jinki hung up and grabbed his clothes and put them on. While he fixed his hair he tried to think of things that weren't appealing at all. That meant not thinking about Lillie and thinking about the most boring things and others that he hated.

He was doing well when the object of his desires entered the bedroom, juggling a box with pizza and a bottle of coke.

He looked at her feeling sorrowful that he had to go and leave what could have been the best night of his life to another time.

Her eyes met his and she quickly looked away, still feeling self-conscious. While she placed everything on the bed he tried hard not to look at her chest or anywhere that could be called her body. Instead, he focused on her eyes.

“L, I have bad news!”

"What is wrong?" Her eyes automatically dropped to the pillow.

"I can’t eat pizza with you! I forgot I had a company dinner party I can’t miss it! It's work... "

"Oh!"

"I am so sorry that I screwed up! "

"No." She sat in front of him again, shaking her head. "I'll wait, it’s alright!” She pressed her lips together “There’s just one problem..." and her eyes went down.

"Yes, and I need you to do something for me." As soon as the words came out from his mouth she widened her eyes and her cheeks became as red as he never saw them. Jinki blinked his eyes until he realized what she was thinking. God, he would die if she touched him there if any part of her touched him there. He couldn't wait to be inside her, to make love with her. He groaned because that wasn't helping and ran a hand through his hair.

“God no...its not that.” He cleared his throat. “Can you just leave the bedroom for a few minutes?” She bit her lower lip thinking something else that was equally dirty but didn't involve her manual help. “No, I'm also not doing that. I just need to stop thinking about and everything that might lead to it and you here it's impossible.”

“Oh.” She touched her cheek cutely and stood up from the bed.

“I’ll be outside then.”

“Thank you.” He watched her go and as soon as she closed the door he sighed disheartened.

Jules turned the television off and stretched. She was jealous of Lillie. It's been a while since she last had or even kissed a man. She needed to date and hopefully, the next man in her life would be Jonghyun.

The appearance of a flushed dazed Lillie in the middle of the living room surprised Jules.

"What are you doing here?"

"I was kicked out!"

"Oh?"

“Jinki needs to go to work.”

Jules looked at her confused, her eyes drifting to the door of her roommate's bedroom but no Jinki was coming out.

"Alright so why isn’t he leaving the room?"

"He can’t!" Lillie touched her cheeks.

"Why?"

"Because..." she rolled her eyes and looked at the floor pulling at her hoodie.

Jules kneeled on the couch " Lillie….did you kill your boyfriend with love?”

"What? No! We didn’t do anything! I mean we did…but not what you think we did!” Jules laughed and Lillie crossed her arms over her chest “He just can’t leave the room in that condition!" Her voice dropped low and her eyes drifted down.

Jules raised her eyebrows slowly realizing what her friend meant.

"Oh wow! I'm so proud of you!" Jules jumped from the couch and hugged her " But you should be inside helping him!"

Lillie pushed Jules away "You are a ert!"

"You say that now, but I bet that when you two start doing it it’s going to be madness! I'll have to put soundproof walls in my room! I bet you both are so ually frustrated that you will be like two bunnies procreating!"

"Stop!" Lillie covered her ears and sat on the couch frustrated. Why did he have to leave for work? The timing couldn't be worse.

Jinki slowly counted to 50 and then hummed several children's songs until it worked.

He got up from the bed and straightened his pants and fixed her covers. The soft toy he gave her had fallen down the bed so he grabbed it.

"Take good care of her! Enjoy it while you can! "He placed it over the bed, laying its head on her pillow, and then left the bedroom.

Jules and Lillie that were sitting on the couch immediately turned to look at him. He awkwardly stood between them and the front door.

"I'll be going then!"

Lillie rose quickly rushing towards him and Jinki saw from the corner of his eyes how Jules looked at his pants smirking. Lillie told her of course.

They walked together to the door and Jinki started putting his shoes on.

"Sorry, I wish I could stay longer." She had no idea how strongly he wanted that.

He rose and Lillie stepped closer and wrapped her arms around his sides hugging him. He hugged her back and closed his eyes inhaling her scent. Her hair smelled so good and it took him all of his strength to not take his shoes off and pull her back to the bedroom again.

"I love you!" She whispered and he rubbed his nose on her cheek, caressing her.

"I know! I love you too!" Jinki kissed her forehead. "I'll call you later."

She nodded but didn’t let go of him.

"Are you trying to bring dubulge to life again so I can’t go away?" He asked attempting to be funny and that seemed to work since Lillie immediately released him. He wondered if he went too far with his joke but she shyly smiled, shaking her head negatively.

“I’m just kidding. It doesn't work like that….I mean I don't get aroused that easily...Well, I did today but we did more than a hug we…”

She placed a hand on his chest making him stop and he chuckled shutting up.

"Stay well Tokki!" Jinki stepped back into the hallway and waved at her before entering the elevator.

Why can’t I get myself to say it, if I rush myself maybe I’ll never get to see her again

So I won’t give up on my destiny, that is you

My love is bang bang burning up ~

Jinki flew home and dressed up quickly before the manager arrived to take them. They were going together so they could drink at the party without problems. There was always someone drinking too much at those dinner parties. Thus the company made ​​sure that there would be no accidents or scandals because of that. It was safer to be driven around by the managers.

Jinki got a small scolding from a grumpy Kibum but that was all so he didn't have to share with the members how embarrassing his body acted that afternoon.

The dinner was at a famous Hotel in Seoul and even though it was a secret some fans knew about it and were at the door waiting for the idols to leave. They couldn’t understand how they found out where they were every time.

They saw the rookies' presentation sitting at the same table and as usual, shared between them their opinion. They were good, they danced pretty well and had some good voices. One looked like a copy of Taemin.

"Where did they find a Taemin twin? " Key said eating a heart-shaped egg roll.

Taemin shrugged and took his phone from his pocket.

"Why are you still eating?" Jonghyun nuzzled Kibum’s arm.

"I'm hungry and I'm bored!"

"I'm also feeling like that and I’m not eating! Pretty soon we have to get you out of here rolling!"

"You're just jealous because you're on a diet again!" Minho pointed out looking at a group of female trainees chatting in the corner looking at the Super Junior members table laughing.

"They are cute!" Jonghyun moved forward leaning his elbows on the table.

Jinki agreed, nodding and grinning and Kibum gave him a slap on the arm.

"You already have one! Let the others for us! No eye-smiles! "

"The redhead..." Minho noticed "with green eyes!"

"No, the one with long black hair!" Kibum put down his chopsticks and waved to Amber who was clowning around next to Victoria who laughed uncontrollably.

"Damn! We really need a girlfriend! "Jonghyun chuckled looking at the girl with curly black hair.

It wasn't as if they would make a move on them but it was normal for the members to talk about girls.

"I need to go to the bathroom!" Kibum looked at the others with cute eyes blinking.

"No, no way! Last time I went with you! " Jonghyun grumbled.

Kibum had the serious problem of rarely going to the bathroom alone at public events. There were fans outside the Hotel and many were capable of getting inside. Since he was almost caught with his pants down in an event, he never went alone to the bathroom again without making sure it was safe. So he always needed someone to keep guard. Pictures of him peeing on magazines and internet websites were his worst nightmare.

"I can’t! I have to make a phone call! "Taemin, the mysterious maknae, stood up and turned away from the table.

"Hum, something looks fishy!" Jonghyun remarked.

"He probably has a girlfriend!" Minho grabbed his glass of champagne and drank from it until the stare of the other three men started to bother him.

"What? He said nothing to me. I'm just guessing.”

"Ask him!" Jonghyun requested Jinki. If there was someone with whom Taemin would open up that one was Jinki. Taemin admired him a lot and he had always treated him like a younger brother.

"I'll try!" he promised. He didn’t like to pressure Taemin to say anything. He knew he took his time to open up.

"Then who is going with me? " Kibum asked again.

"Kai bai bo?" suggested Minho.

They nodded. They used that game for making decisions in nearly everything.

Jinki leaned against the wall waiting for Kibum to come out of the bathroom. He was the unlucky one who lost the game. Even though he was bored he wasn't that upset with the loss and instead looked down the deserted hall relieved for a moment of peace and quiet and took out his phone from his pants pocket. At that time he could be in bed with Lillie with her in his arms. He didn't even mind if it didn't end up in .

with Lillie…

He ed another button on the collar of his shirt and sighed. He couldn't stop thinking of what they did, the way the skin of her shoulders felt, and how y she looked only on her bra.

"Are you sleeping?"

He quickly texted Lillie, absentmindedly walking in circles in the corridor in front of the bathrooms. A woman with long hair came out from the female bathroom and bumped into him. Clumsy as he was he let his phone fall to the floor.

"Sorry, Onew sunbaenim!" The woman grabbed his phone, bowed and he saw black eyes look at him. It was the girl they were staring at just a few minutes ago, one of the rookies, and she was beautiful.

"Ah, it's alright!"

"Min Hee! It’s my name sunbaenim! " she bowed politely ”I'm a big fan of SHINee! I hope to be as famous as Onew sunbaenim someday!"

Onew smiled and she took a quick look at his phone as if she suddenly remembered she was holding it and handed it back to him.

"Ahhh the girl in the picture is pretty!"

Jinki blinked his eyes a little taken aback. He had a photo of Lillie smiling as the background of his phone and maybe that wasn't a good idea. If that woman was a fan and not a rookie at the company things could get complicated.

"Yes, she's a friend! " It was a lousy lie and she clearly didn't buy it.

"She has a beautiful smile and big eyes. She is a foreigner right?”

"I'm much better now!" Kibum left the bathroom interrupting the conversation and saving Jinki from the uncomfortable questioning.

The woman once again bowed and introduced herself.

"Oh hello! I’m Key, but you probably know that already! You dance really well!"

She thanked him, threw one last smile to Onew, and left.

They waited until she was too far away to hear them.

"I leave you in the hallway for a few minutes and you just get yourself another admirer!" Key joked.

"I did nothing!" Jinki shrugged and Kibum patted his back.

When they reached their table Taemin was there already too. Eunhyuk, from Super Junior, was at their table and they were all whispering and laughing.

Jinki’s phone vibrated and he read the text Lillie sent him.

"No, I don't think I can sleep after what happened today!”

Jinki knew the feeling too well.

Eunhyuk slid on the seat beside him and stared at Jinki with a big smile.

"Any news, Jinki? Anything that you should share with your hyung?"

"Oh, you have no idea!" Minho giggled.

“Oh really? Tell me Jinki.”

Jinki grabbed his glass of champagne. It was going to be a very long night.

(Hey) Even if just a little bit (Hey) Just by someone’s eyes meeting you

Everything, and everyone goes crazy for you, they go crazy

Bonus: Kibum doesn't want to go to the bathroom alone (XD):