It's been 5 days since I left the hospital. This was the date my mom, dad, and brother were killed by him.

I turned off the television and crawled out of bed. My feet came in contact with the cushiony carpet flooring. I went to take a shower to wake myself up.

"What should I wear?" I mumbled as I peeked out the window. The snow was melting away and all I could see was the frosty concrete melting before my eyes. Flowers were blooming and color was evident all around me.

I picked out white button up shirt with the sleeves rolled and held up with buttons. I tucked my shirt into my black skinny jeans. I combed my hair and sighed at my appearance. I had a couple of pimples. My dark circles were coming out. My eyebrows were a little bushy. I now felt that makeup and no makeup would look the same on me. I shook my head at the mirror. My bangs were overgrown and the color of my hair was a little plain. Just black.

I had no work today, simply because the manager said I needed to rest some more. With nothing to do, my mind wandered to a place where I wanted to face palm myself for thinking about it.

My mind was seungho, seungho, seungho. I had flashbacks to where I thought he was going to kiss me, the flashback where we hugged, the times he carried me, and the time where he fell asleep on the couch I'm sitting on. I smiled at these thoughts and for some reason, I felt like seeing him.

"I'll go buy lunch for them today," I smiled to myself.

"Yobosayo?" Mark answered.

"What are you guys doing today?" I asked. The background noise where Mark was, was loud.

"Uh, the guys are doing an interview today and filming a CF," he answered.

"Where are you guys right now?" I asked again.

"The interview is almost done and we're going to film in the studio by that one coffee shop with the big crossaint sign. Wae?" he asked.

"Nawh, just wondering. I miss going to work," I sighed. I was smiling while I said this. I actually enjoyed sleeping in.

"What should we do? You're going to come back in 3 weeks!" he said. I laughed at his response.

"Anyway, I gotta go now! I shouldn't be on the phone," he whispered.

"Talk to you later!" I said.

"Bye bye," he said before hanging up.

I grabbed my purse and headed to the door. I put on my leather stiletto booties and headed out. I got into my car and drove to the nearest flower shop.

"Annyeonghasaeyo!" a teenage girl greeted me. I gave her a small smile and a nod. I examined the flowers in the shop. I would need three different kinds of flowers. My dad liked white roses. My mom liked lillies and my brother liked anything blue. I would get him blue hydrangeas.

"Kamsahamnida," I thanked the girl who wrapped up the flowers for me nicely.

"You look a lot like a celebrity from those kpop groups," she gleamed.

I smiled at her compliment.

"Gomawo," I smiled as I started for the door.

I placed the flowers on the passenger seat and drove off to the cemetary.

"Excuse me," I muttered softly as I made my way past the graves. The idea of almost stepping on the ledger made me feel bad. At least I pay whoever lay here some respect. At last, I found the three graves under the cherry blossom tree. I walked slowly toward them and I stopped, two steps from reaching the graves.

I took a deep breath and placed the flowers upon the grass. The ledger wouldn't be ready for another 5 months. One by one I placed the flowers down. My mother's first.

"Umma, I came to see you," I said softly as I placed the flowers down.

"Appa. I hope you guys can hear me," I said. I wasn't near to crying but I felt so lonely and depressed on the inside.

"Jihoo-ah, you have to become a gold medalist arachi? Make noona proud," I said as I patted the grass where Jihoo lay underneath. After I paid them a visit, I checked the time. It was almost twelve and I had to bring a surprise lunch for them.

"What should I buy them?" I wondered as I scanned the food in front of me. It was in a small family owned business with cuisines of all sorts.

Mina and Luna don't like to eat spicy foods. Mark and Jake love pad thai. Kevin and Alex loved baked anything. I got them these delicious and hearty bagel sandwiches. I got the manager his favorite chicken pot pie. Now for the 5 boys. Mir liked Takoyaki whiched were Japanese octopus dumpling balls. Cheondung would always drool over chicken wings. G.O. liked Japanese beef bowls and Joon liked sukiyaki but it would be hard to bring a hot pot. Instead I got him grilled beef with other things on the side. For Seungho, I got him cutlet curry. I bought a large fruit salad. I placed these things into my two picnic baskets after paying. The baskets were heavy. Now I needed drinks.

After I placed the baskets into my trunk, I drove off to a pearl tea store and bought everyone a drink. The entire meal was costly but I didn't really mind at all, but I still can't believe I did this just to see Seungho.

"No. I can't go in," I stressed as I sat in the car, looking at the building.

"I feel embarassed even though they have no idea of what I'm thinking," I muttered. Suddenly I got an idea. I would write a note and stick it to the baskets.

"You're so smart Jikyung," I said to myself as I wiggled in my seat. I cleared my throat and got out my notepad and wrote:

Annyeong!

You guys have been working so hard these past few weeks. Even though I haven't been @ work I still miss working with you guys T.T

Don't stress out too much and remember to eat ON time. I packed this for you all to enjoy! I hope you guys love it<3 Hwaiting to all of you and see you soon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-J.P.

I sticked the sticky note onto the one of the baskets and headed toward the building. As I opened the door to the studio, I heard loud music playing. I saw a few people who I didn't recognize but I saw my co-workers at a corner discussing something. I noticed some MBLAQ boys goofing off in another corner. I rolled my eyes but no one saw since I had my shades on. Heck yes.

I saw a table nearby and placed the two baskets onto them. I was going to look to find Seungho. As I looked around, I saw two figures standing very close together in front of a green screen. A man was ordering directions and the two were listening closely. There was a girl and there he was. Yang Seungho.

I took off my shades to get a better look. She was wearing a white dress and he was dressed in white as well. As I looked around, Joon was dressed in blue and so was another girl. I felt slightly better but I had no idea what this bitter feeling was. I put on my shades and came face to face with Cheondung. I stopped in my tracks. He bowed and I bowed back. He looked at me for a second with his head tilted to the side. He walked away and back to the set since his manager called him.

Phew. Close call.

I chuckled at how clueless he was and headed back to my car. I had no idea where I was going to go. I certainly did not feel like going home.

"Today should be a me-day," I smiled as I started the engine.

After nearly 30 minutes of driving, I parked my car in front of a gray building with large glass windows from ceiling to ground. This was my destination.

"Annyeonghasaeyo," the lady behind the counter greeted me. I nodded at her. I took a seat and waited ten minutes or so before the woman with a white coat was available.

"Just these problem spots?" she asked. I nodded.

"No problem. We can fix it right now," she said as she got out her tools. I layed back in the seat and I wore these interesting goggles for protection. She started her tool and I heard "zzz zzz" sounds.

"It'll feel like a rubber band. Don't worry, it won't hurt," she said. I nodded and closed my eyes.

She zapped 7 times and she was finished.

"Avoid water and don't touch it too much. It'll go away naturally. And for the medication cream," she said.

"Use this at night and when you are out in the sun, don't forget to use sunblock," she told me. I thanked her and went to pay at the counter.

I swiped my card and carried out the things I bought in a bag.

"One step to beautifying myself. Check!" I smiled to myself as I put on my sunglasses and drove to off to another destination on my list.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Please fill this out and sign here," the lady told me.

"Neh," I answered. I filled out a form and handed it back to the lady. She entered some information into her computer and she led me to a different area of the building. I saw many people with a slighty pained facial expression.

What I was going to do was going to need commitment.

I was greeted by a large male. He had a nice face I had to admit. I shook his hand and sat down with him.

"So we'll fix that area by your waist and your chin as well. We'll see results soon enough," he explained.

"So, we'll meet three times a week for 2 hours. Is that okay?" he asked.

"No problem," I answered.

"Alright then. Thank you," he smiled as we shook hands. I walked out of the building and took in the fresh air. I felt refreshed.

I got into my car and drove off to a nearby mall.