Hey vonpika!
Read Read Read Review Shop (not accepting Requests)Not So Far Apart on the Color Spectrum by vonpika
Review by ThisMomentWhen
Title (10/10)
Long story titles aren't usually my cup of tea, but strangely I liked this one. The title alone doesn't say much about the story though, which ain't a problem in this case cause the name of the first chapter explains it quite well. Or at least I hope I got it right with my understanding..Jongin was driven by his jealousy, which is represented by the color green, to kill Kai, which is represented by the color red. And as far as Google told me, green and red aren't that far apart on the color spectrum. It's quite symbolic and I love it.
Overall Appearance (-/-)
no poster, no background: won't count this in!
Description and Foreword (8/10)
When I first read the Description I wasn't quite sure if this would be any good, it sounds so stereotypical. But the short excerpt in the Foreword blew my mind if I'm totally honest. Those two small sentences made me really anticipate the story.
Plot (5/10)
The plot line has been quite predictable, to be honest. You've mentioned in the foreword 'character death' which gave away that Kai would die in the end. The plot itself was good from a readers view, but I would have wished for more twists and turns.
Language (13/20)
Here and there I've spotted a few tense errors, for example:
(x) Kai is already tainted – (o) Kai has already tainted
Another thing I've noticed is that you tend to use too much sophisticated vocabularies in the same sentences:
(x) ..while I was graced with facetious plaudits that masked disdain behind their farce. - (o) ..while all I received were some mocking plaudits along with masked disdains from those pitiful people.
Characterization (6/10)
Jongin was perfectly characterized. He has been portrayed as the 'shadow' of Kai, constantly being overshadowed by him, which led to his revenge. If I'm quite honest here, I didn't understand till the end when you mentioned that the wounds self-inflicted, that the 'I' narrating the story was non other
than the other persona of Kai.
But sadly, the characterization of Kai wasn't all that great. You should have emphasized on the contrast between the two characters, but not describing them as two individuals of two totally different characteristics.
Flow (9.5/10)
It could have been a tad bit longer, describing Kai better, but beside that I must say it was perfectly fine. The pace wasn't too fast nor too slow, just in the good middle where it should be.
Overall Enjoyment (10/10)
The suspense and angst has made me read till the very end, and I loved every second of it. The ending where Krystal has found out the death of Kai, was a great way letting the readers know who the 'I' was. Jongin's psychological development made me enjoy the whole story even more, and even though it was quite a stereotypical story, I'm glad I got to read this.
Grand Total (61.5/90)
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