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Humanity’s Code by flamzfox
Review by coolgirlaamy
 
Title(5/5)
I love the title. It’s relevant and it’s short and simple yet quite descriptive at the same time. I mean, when I first looked at it, I could tell that there was some kind of meaning to it, like it actually means something rather than just being a title for a story. It’s like the title in itself kind of tells you about the story. You captured my attention from the title and when I saw the review request, there was something about the title that was telling me that it was going to be a really good story and I was going to enjoy it so you get full marks here. 
 
Description and Foreword (10/10)
Great description. It had the right amount of detail in it to let me know what this story was going to be about, let me know about the characters but it didn’t give too much information that I knew what this whole story was going to be about. So, yes, there was enough information to capture my attention and make me keep reading so good job. I also liked the kind of detail you put in it and the way you went about writing the description. It was written very stylishly, it wasn’t just bland and boring, and I just really liked it. I guess this is the way that I want to write my descriptions too but I can never do it well enough. 
 
That one line at the end, ‘Kris had programmed life itself’ managed to have quite a lot of impact on it’s own and somehow I found myself imagining it being said by that guy who narrated the start of the ‘MAMA’ music video and it just seemed so amazing. 
 
Now, onto the foreword, I love love love it when people use excerpts from the story. I don’t really know or understand why that is the case but in my opinion, it’s the best way to capture your reader’s attention, other than writing a prologue and putting it in the foreword. I also really like how the foreword links with the description itself and the line, ‘Kris had programmed life itself.’ I think it fits in really well like that so I definitely think you picked the best excerpt. I also like how it reveals the right about of information about the story without telling us everything. I think you have been really successful with the description and foreword so good job.
 
 
Plot and Originality (30/30)
In terms of the originality, it isn’t completely original but it is close to being so. It’s similar in some ways to the dystopian theme which is becoming quite popular nowadays and to the Hunger Games, with the ‘Fatal Bet’ idea. However, it does stand out from the rest of that and it’s difficult to make something completely original so I’m still going to give you full marks for originality. I don’t think I have ever read anything remotely similar to this and I don’t understand how someone could have come up with all of this. It’s just amazing to think that someone put in so much though to develop a plot like this and I’m quite speechless. 
 
As for the plot, I’m in love with it. I just- I can’t put into words how much I am in love with this plot and I’m quite amazed by it, as I’ve already mentioned, and I don’t think I have ever enjoyed a plot like this so much before. From the creation of Yixing, the growing love, the bet and the giving up of his life to protect his loved ones in the end, I loved every part of this. At one point, I was hoping that it could have never ended, that things could keep going on, that Yixing would have the chance to live once again. But, I suppose, everything has to come to an end. 
 
 
Characterisation (20/20)
These were perfect characters. There isn’t any way that I can mark you down in this section because then it would be unfair and I would be stealing marks from you for no reason. They were realistic, life-like, with their own individual traits and you kind of got the chance to know them and see them develop through the story. I mean, I hated Kris at the start, well, not exactly hated but you know what I mean - he just seemed so evil and cruel, only wanting to save himself from death without caring about anyone else. Yet as the story progressed, we saw a softer side to him come out, we got to see him fall in love and he was almost willing to give up his life for Yixing and Suho to be together. I also had similar feelings towards Suho, thinking that he was so evil and mean for letting Yixing die like that but then we realize that he actually didn’t know about Yixing’s situation and he did love him. Then, he was also willing to forfeit for Yixing’s sake, so Yixing could be with Kris. So yes, I really love your characters. 
 
 
Writing Style and Language (25/25)
I can’t mark you down here either. I love your writing style and I’m sure that I have mentioned that to you in your last review. You manage to capture so much emotion and the different scenes quite well, without over-describing them, and I just love that about your writing. I also like how you have a good collection of vocabulary and you find a good balance when you’re writing between the dialogue and the description. I don’t really know what else to say here so good job.
 
As for the language, there weren’t any issues with it. It’s good to see that you have taken what I said onboard last time and improved your grammar. Honestly, I didn’t pick up on any grammar mistakes or anything so you get full marks in this section. Well done.
 
 
Flow (10/10)
The story flowed perfectly. It was neither too slow nor too fast and I think that everything in the story happened at quite a good pace. I maybe would have liked to see a little more development in the romance between Kris and Yixing but honestly, the flow was perfect.
 
 
Total (100/100)
Well done! You’re on our featured list. I loved the story and you definitely deserve this score. You are one of those writers that I would hope to get featured in the future because you definitely deserve with plot lines like these and the vast imagination that you have. I honestly can’t wait to read more of your writing so don’t hesitate to come back for another review. Thanks for requesting.
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Comments

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Lovex2254 #1
Chapter 53: Oh yeah, when you asked how she was so motivated and thing it was somewhat that she wanted to e better an live up to all her dad's expectations which was why she also struggled with purging.
Lovex2254 #2
Chapter 53: Picked up! Thanks for the review!
Recha_L
#3
Username: Recha_L

Story Title: Voice Of Silence

Story Link: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/454440/voice-of-silence-2min-minho-romance-shinee--taemin-

Description: Minho can hear people's thoughts, And Taemin is mute

Reviewer: coolgirlaamy

Is English your first language: No it's third actually ^^

Number of chapters: 5 on going

Thank you ^^
JESLEN #4
Username: littlemisshappyify

Story Title: Imposter

Story Link: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/471056

Description: A woman woke up from a hospital without any memories of who she was and what she is.



She later learned that she is Moon Chae Won, a hated heiress and shunned by society.



She was also engaged to a handsome business tycoon who hated her with a virulence and would stop at nothing to end the engagement.



What would happen if another woman appear and accused her of stealing the woman's identity?



Labeling her as an Imposter?

Reviewer:OutspokenGirl612

Is English your first language: no

Number of chapters: 30 and on going
Banana_Dreams
#5
Chapter 49: Ok~

I'm back from my business trip :D (ok, more or less xD)

Ok, first of all, thanks for the great review! :D
Too harsh? I don't think so, I prefere it that way and I think that your review will help me to improve on myself :)

I'm also super happy that you subscribed to 'Boy Toy'. That means a lot to me ^-^

I'm a little nervous since you say you aren't that into 2PM...so I need to make this story really good...for the sake of 2PM xDD


As you know...I'm a loser when it come to grammar o.o *hahaha~
I try my best to improve, but yeah...
I've requested a beta shop to look through my stories. Since I want my readers to enjoy my stories ^-^

I'm going to correct the errors you wrote down for me. It may take some time since I'm currently really busy, but I'll definitely do it :D

About the characterization. I've written down what they like and dislike. What their fears are, their Family problems and of course their looks ^^
I'm in generall really bad at characterization, but I'll try to add in a little more in the next chapter :)

Ok...about the xD
I guess that it really hurts? ö.ö
But I wanted them to be rough to each other...because well, they don't have feelings for each other. (At first xP)
The story is nearing the end and you'll notice that they are getting more softer towards each other. That was the main idea about the whole plot ^^

I always worry about the lenght of my chapters, so I'm happy to hear that they are perfectly fine! :D

Ok, that was the long comment I've promised ^-^
I already credited you and the shop in my foreword~

Thanks for the nice review once again ♥

Ps.: I hope I can update soon. I'm currently working on a surprise fanfic for a friend, which needs to be finished on a specific date...( since it's a birthday present ^^)
But since it's nearly finished, I'm going to update soon ^-^
Shiny_A_plus
#6
Chapter 51: wow! ty so much!! perfect score~~~ I feel so <3'ed ^_^ sorry it took me so long to reply… I'm on hiatus atm so I am just popping in to say ty and link back!! ty again!!! XD I am really glad you liked it. Like, super duper!! it makes my heart fluffeh.
PastelClover
#7
Request Form :

Username: PastelClover

Story Title: Let’s Meet in Our Next Life

Story Link: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/569804/let-s-meet-in-our-next-life-angst-infinite-myungsoo-oneshot-romance

Description: Hi, My name is Hyeri.

Lee Hyeri.



I have been living horribly for 4 years now.

Why?

Are you curious?

Just read the story and you will found out.

Don't expect this story to be a romance-comedy story.

It's not.

It depressing me

Driving me crazy.

My whole life is totally ruined.

TOTALLY RUINED.

By a guy.

A guy that is not even existed in this world anymore.

Reviewer: Anyone

Is English your first language: Nope

Number of chapters: 1
Banana_Dreams
#8
Chapter 49: Hey there~
I just saw my review :D

I'll comment some more!
It's just that I am currently on a business trip. So my laptop is at home T___T

I'll make sure to credit you and the shop as soon as I am home again :3

Btw. Thanks for the great review <3
A longer comment will come as soon as I am back ^_^