I woke up today, sun shining through my linen, purple curtains...
I had dreamed so well this night!
I dreamed I was holding ChangMin’s hand...
We were on some strange mission to free the world of a group called the bananas...
Or something like that!
I don’t remember that part well...
The part where I was ChangMin’s girlfriend was another thing, I could remember every detail, from the softness of his hands and lips to the words he’d said.
I sighed, how I wish this would be real!

CRISIS!!
Since we had to wear a uniform, I knew what to wear...
... but one could still have a crisis about which shoes to wear!
I thought I would never be doing this...
Normally I keep my head above such things and just wear the shoes I want to wear without being unable to choose...
Somewhere in the events of this week, my mind had flipped from sophisticated, as I thought I was, to emotional girly girl...
Well, not totally true, I wasn’t drooling and I kept my pride.
Something more girls should do at the presence of ChangMin.
Didn’t they know?
ChangMin wasn’t even looking at them, because of their drooling!
And because he had a girlfriend... sigh...

When I finally decided which shoes I wanted to wear, I couldn’t find them!
They were nowhere in my room, I checked the bathroom, the kitchen, the living room...
‘DONGJAEEEE!! Have you seen my ballerináááás??’ I yelled running through the house.
I heard my brother groaning in his room.
‘DongJae?’ I opened the door of his bedroom.
‘Have you...’
‘Deh, I used your shoes to hit the flies of the ceiling last night... Sorry, I couldn’t reach them without, and the soles were flat... They are over there.’
DongJae pointed to the corner of his room.
‘Aaaaaah!!! There’s a big fly-stain on the nose! DongJae! I tried so hard to keep those ballerinas white and you just kill some random flies ruining my best shoes!’ I yelled at my brother, causing him to sit up in bed, rubbing his fore head.
‘Will you lower your voice? I was sleeping here!’ DongJae whined.
‘Hm!’ I grumbled as I took my shoes.
Then I turned and closed the door with a bang...

In the bathroom I tried to clean my ballerinas.
I brushed on the surface with a soft sponge until my arm was tired and I’d gotten the stain to become almost invisible.
I’ll just wear it now.
Nobody could see the stain, only if they knew it was there...

At school the first class passed very quickly, I had poetry and the teacher made us search for different types of poems, to compare next time...
Like I said, it passed quickly.

I hadn’t seen ChangMin when I was on my way to school or at school.
I really wanted to see him...
It’s sad maybe, but he kind of lit my day.
When I saw him, it made my day, it made me know I had lived this day...

Gina came walking beside me, next class would be English and she was in the same class.
NiMa walked on my other side.
Gina moved her head to my shoulder and whispered in my ear.
‘Have you bought a present already? I don’t know what to buy for NiMa... Have you got time to go shopping with me?’
‘Deh, I’ll go with you..’ I whispered back.
‘Good!’ Gina said aloud, giving me the thumbs up.
She was clearly relieved I was going to help her find a present...
Or was it something else?
‘Girls, I feel left out... What were you gossiping about? Am I not allowed to hear?’ NiMa pouted.
‘Sorry Neems... Not this time...’ I replied, looking supposedly sad for her.
‘You’d better tell me, I know you won’t be able to keep it to yourself for too long!’ NiMa threatened playfully.
‘Ah, you’ll find out soon enough!’ Both Gina and I laughed.

As the school day continued I started to worry about ChangMin coming to school...
I still hadn’t seen him.
Usually I spot him on my way to school, even if I don’t, I would see him before the second class ends...
Instead of that, I happen to have HeeChul following me everywhere since third class this day.

When the bell rang for lunch break, I walked with my friends to the canteen.
Our table was already kept taken for us by EunHyuk, YeSung and the twin.
NiMa went to sit next to YeSung, looking at him with shy and expectant eyes.
YeSung seemed totally ignorant to her behavior and went on separating the crusts from his bread.
I think he was just being a guy and didn’t even notice NiMa was speaking body language...
I guess nobody else noticed it, because everybody except me, NiMa and YeSung, had their attention focused on a fight between two students at the table next to ours...
It got pretty bad, since they started throwing food at each other.
Some people did never grow up!
I wanted to leave, I didn’t see ChangMin and I wanted to look for him.
I tapped NiMa’s shoulder and said: ‘I’m off to talk to ChangMin, we have to discuss the music for our project... See you in class!’
I didn’t wait for NiMa to reply.
I knew she would either want to go with me, or kept me from leaving...
She sure looked like she would do the latter...
She must have felt a bit lonely since YeSung gave more attention to his crusts than to her...

ChangMin where could you possibly be? I thought...
All of his friends were in the canteen... even his girlfriend...
Was ChangMin waiting for me somewhere?
It rained, so he wouldn’t be in the school garden...
Hmm... maybe the library!
I went to the school library to find it locked and dark inside.
He was obviously not in there...
Then where could he be?
We didn’t have other places where we met...
... except the ladies room, but that was no place to meet, was it?
Our meeting was accidental too.
I guess he stood me up...
How come? Who would suggest a lunch together and then not attend on purpose?
Only reason could be that it was his intention to hurt me...
That couldn’t be right, but what would be a good explanation?

I turned back to the canteen to join my friends again.
Today I’ll e-mail ChangMin about this!
Darn! After I came back from shopping.
I wasn’t in the mood to shop...
Seems like today was going to end bad!

When the last class of today had passed, Gina and I walked towards the exit, when HeeChul came walking next to me.
A sudden burst of annoyance made that I started to yell at him...
‘HeeChul, what type of girl do you like? Because I’ll search her for you! TO GET YOU OF MY BACK!!’
I was cooking inside and my shoulders tensed like someone was pulling invisible strings upwards...
I suddenly eased, when I saw HeeChul looking at me dumbfounded, at the loss for words.
In the corner of my eye I could see the hand of Gina making the gesture of cash between her index finger and her thumb.
Something was going on...
And I couldn’t think of one reason that’ll make Gina’s gestures logical in this situation!

When Gina and I were in the center of Seoul we decided to go and look for jewelry.
We walked past the hospital when suddenly an ambulance came rushing past us...
The doors opened and a stretcher was lifted out of the ambulance.
My eyes were filled with horror.
On the stretcher lay a comatose ChangMin!
A woman, seemingly his mother (the resemblance was major), kept repeating his name, and telling him to wake up...
The stretcher was quickly carried into the hospital, I ran after it, not caring about Gina following me or not.
I had to know he was alright...
Don’t die!

________~END OF CHAPTER 12~________