"Hey!" I called as I entered my room. I saw him looking at the shelf as I walked towards him. "What're you doing?" I asked. "Just looking at your shelf." he answered as he grabbed a book. "It seems lke you're interested in fictional stories." he said as he flipped its pages. "Yes, so?" I retorted as I snatched the book away. "Nothing. It's just that, aren't you too old to be reading those kind of things. Fairies, monsters, come on, Yoobin." he chuckled. Is he teasing me? 

"Well, I was reading this when I was 11 or something. So, back off." I said as I pushed him away, losing his balance and knocking out the books out from the shelf. "Yah! Look at what you did!" I blurted. "You were the one who pushed me." he proclaimed as I glared at him. 

"Yah! You were being defensive over your books." he said as I rolled my eyes at him. "Let's just fix this." I said as I picked up the scattered books on the floor. "I really can't believe that you read books like this." he teased as I slapped his chest. "You're so mean for a boyfriend." I stated. 

"Hey! What's this?" he asked when he noticed a old, scrappy notebook on the floor. "No, don't touch that!" I shouted, but he already grabbed it. "Oh! It's a diary!" he beamed, already engrossed. "Can you please give it back?!!" I said, annoyed at him. "Why? Are you hiding something from your boyfriend?" he joked as he continued flipping the page. "It's not a diary, it's a journal." I stated in a matter-of-fact. 

"Ooops. Something fell off." he said. "What's this?" he asked as he picked it up. "Wait! Don't!" I stopped him, but it was already too late. "Who's this?" he asked as I looked down. I can't seem to answer him right now. All the words are clogged up in my throat as I tried to gulp. It seems like I can't say the words that suits the person in the picture.

"Hey! She looks someone familiar. She----" 

"It's my mom." I said as I choked on a sob, not wanting to break down. "Really?" his eyes widened. "Yea, uhmm, Myungsoo, I'm kinda sleepy now, I'll sleep first." I stuttered as I wiped a tear on my cheek and stood up. I laid down at the side of the bed as I covered myself with a blanket. I heard him sighed as the light in my room turned off. I could feel a weight at the other side as he scooted closer to me, to get the other half of the blanket.

"I'm sorry, baby, I didn't mean,too." he whispered. "It's okay." I muttered as I turned to my side to face him. "Don't cry. It hurts me alot when you cry." he said as he wiped the tears that are escaping. I gently smiled at him as he kissed my forehead. "Go to sleep. I'm here." he said as I closed my eyes.

I woke up, feeling an arm on my waist. I carefully removed his arm, not wanting to wake him up. I went downstairs to help my grandma in the kitchen. "Goodmorning Halmeoni!" I said as I gave a kiss on her cheek. "Goodmorning sweetie. Where's Myungsoo?" she asked, "Still sleeping." I answered as I tied my apron. 

"Ohhh. Did you tired him out last night?" she giggled as I cringed my nose. "Halmeoni!" I blurted. "Why are you being so loud so early in the morning?" my grandpa said as he went inside the kitchen. "It was nothing, harabeoji." I answered. "Where's Myungsoo?" he asked as he drank some water. "Sleeping." I said as I cut the vegetables. "Tired him out last night?" he laughed as my grandma giggled. I just shook my head as I laughed with them. How I missed this morning laughters.

"Hey! It's Myungsoo!" L came in with a tired look on his eyes as my grandpa approached him. "Woah there! Why do you look so tired? Is she rough on you last night?" my grandpa chuckled as he patted his back. "Harabeoji!" I shouted. L just chuckled as he looked down in embarrassment. "I was just kidding. Come on, Myungsoo!" my grandpa said.

"Uh, where are you taking him?" I asked. "We're just going to the farm." he answered. "Ehhh? Farm?" L asked, wide-eyed. "Yeah, come on." he said. "Hmmm. Harabeoji! I think----------I'm coming!" L cut me off. I gave him a inquisitive look as he nodded at me. "What is it?" he asked. "Nothing. Take care of him, okay harabeoji?" I said. "Don't worry, I will." he said as the two of them left. 

I sighed for the nth time as my grandma looked at me worriedly. "Something bothering you, sweetie?" she asked. "No.." I sighed as she furrowed her eyebrows. "I mean...I'm just bothered right now." I truthfully answered. "About what?" she asked. "About my life, about my real mom." I sighed. "Myungsoo saw her picture and I'm afraid that he would ask some questions about her." I said.

"And what's wrong about that?" she asked as she sat beside me. "Well, what will I tell him, I don't even know the answer myself." I disappointedly said. "Cheer up, sweetie, I'm sure you'll be able to tell him." she said as she gave me a warm smile. "I hope so." I said.

"Why don't you go take a bath. Grandma prepared some hot water for you." she suggested. "Thanks, halmeoni." I said as I gave her a warm big hug.

I was at the back porch of the house, seating at the end of the wooden floor as I played the snow with my boots. I opened my palm as I waited for the snow to land on it. "Here, drink this," he handed me a cup of hot chocolate as I looked at him. "Thanks." I muttered.

We just sat there as we both watched the snow falling from above. I took a sip as I endevoured the sweetness and warmness of my drink. I let out a sigh as he initially looked at me. "Hey..are you okay?" he asked as he placed his hand on my hand that was getting warm because of the drink. I looked down as I shook my head.

"You're lying." he said as I looked down. "Is this about yesterday? About the journal?" he asked. I looked down, not wanting to deny it from him because it's already obvious judging from my actions. "Yoobin, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have----"

"It's not about the journal, it's about my mom." I answered. "Oh." he looked down. "Myungsoo, I should've told you about her." I disappointedly said. "What do you know about my past, Myungsoo?" I asked as I looked at him, sternly. "Your father died when you were 2, you've been living with your grandparents since you were a kid and you moved to Seoul when your 16." he calmly answered.

"That's not all, Myungsoo." I bitterly smirked as I looked down. "My father died because of a car crash, they were trying to escape from a bunch of goons. I was in my mother's hand back then as I watched my father drive with worriedness and nervousness on his face. Next thing I knew, the car was being flipped, sending it to the side of the road. Me and my mom survived, but my dad didn't. Then, my mother left me to my grandparents, I was crying hard when she left right before my eyes, I don't even know why because I don't even know what was happening that time." I choked on my sob as I wiped the tears away from my cheeks.

"That day, she didn't come back for me anymore. I was determined to look for her, that's why I went to Seoul. But it feels like there's no more chance for me to see her, I don't know what to do anymore. See, Myungsoo. Can't you see how selfish my mother is?" I blurted as I looked at him with my tear-stained cheeks. "Shhh, don't say that." he tried to calm me down.

But the pain was already too much, I can't bear with it any longer. It was already killing me inside, all of this lying and secrets, I..I can't take it anymore. I bitterly chuckled, "My mother isn't you always think she is. She hates me! She thinks I was just a burden to her since I was born that's why she left me. She hates me, Myungsoo! She hates me..." I said between hiccups.

"Calm down, baby.." he said as he engulfed into a warm hug. I sobbed on his jacket as I soothed my back. "I'm sorry, I...I'm really sorry.." I said. "It's okay, baby. Everything will be alright." he whispered.

"Don't you hate me?" I asked as I looked at me. He gently smiled at me as he wiped my cheeks with both of his thumbs. "No, I don't hate you, and never will." I smiled at him as he pulled me into his arms again.

That night, I never felt so relieved, and it was all because of Myungsoo. He was there, beside me, just brushing my back as he hushed me down. I don't know what will happen to me, if he wasn't there. The night was coming by so fast that I even ended up sleeping in his arms.