Nervous,,it's the first thing saengie had felt as he woke up early in the morning,, he's having a filmed for a Show, itwas strongheart,,all knows what is strong heart means,,making confessions and the most hurtful and crying moment of their lives..he isn't nervous because of it,,he can actually give many crying moments of his lives bu the thing he was worrying that makes his heart race in nervousnes is the other guest,, it was his fake husband, kim hyun joong,,he doesn't know what was on the show's mind..they had rumored issues before,,he will sure it will be opened...He was actually worried on how he could face the other inspite of everything that had happened to them before or actually just few days ago...

On the other hand Kim hyun joong was in deep thought while sipping his coffee in the morning,,preparing himself for the sudden guesting in the show,,he was told only a day before the filming..he isn't nervous nor worried, the thing in his mind now is how could he face the other,,shall he greet him properly, greet him like a stranger to him,,or greet him like they were close since an issue was opened to the public before? too many ways, different ways on how he could greet properly but there is nothing he could find the best to do..

Young saeng left home and proceeded to the studio,,walking nervously to the corridor towards the said studio, stopping by his waiting room and do some retouch..and soon was called for the start,,,he sighed,,"you can do it saengie,,,he said to himself hitting his chest to calm,,stretching his lips and practice to smile naturally and covered his nervous feeling...he cleared his throat before entering, fixing himself as he step in and bowed immediately to other guest,,,there is still a vacant seat and was named under kim hyun joong..he hasn't arrive yet, he glance at it and went to his own seat...heart beats doubled the rateas he heard the familiar deep voice..he didn't move to his seat, seems a bulk of ice was placed around him and he became a frozen meat...the empty seat was now occupied and it was an instinct that a pair of eyes was looking on his direction,,a debate started on his mind,,,"look at him, he was looking at you and waiting...the right side of his mind is telling him,,,,"No! don't look,,it's too awkward if you both met,,,just ignore,,the left brain cells of his head said...

"what will i do? he mumbled under his breath...

"annyeong haseyo! someone spoke on his side,,a sign that the empty seat was just right next to him,,it was obvious because he can see the figure by his side without looking...

.......

Hyun joong came and saw every seats was occupied and only one hasn't filled,,he entered and greeted politely bowing to his seniors and juniors...he saw the person he was expecting to see again after a couple of days...he was actually excited yet being sad,,can he actually talk to him,,why he was excited, to think that there is no way he could talk to him..the person wasn't looking nor greeting him back,,he look to everyone,,,they aren't suspicious right? it was really an awkward moment for them..shall he greet him first? shall he approach him first and make a conversation, because if the awkward thing between them goes, everyone will be suspicious.....

"annyeong haseyo,,he greeted him but the other is not replying,,,he was waiting,,everyonewas busy so no one heard his greeting to the other,,he smiled, crying his heart inside,,how can he be ignored,,,he lowered his head,,,

"de annyeong haseyo...saengie finally greeted back just a few minutes of silence between them, looking to him,,,

Their eyes met as hyun joong looked up again with a smile,,did he heard him greeted back? he isn't sure until he lift his head and took his eyes to the other..saengie forced a smile and hyun joong smiled widely,,hyun joong with his excitement, he pat the other's shoulder,,,he feels so happy recieving a response to the other inspite of their past...

.........

The show started,,they all started to joke around and talk some sad things and happy moments,,,one by one battled of who has the most hardships in life,,,their turn wasn't that long to wait,,as they expected the rumour between them was dragged,,

"De,,,you had your rumour before right? the host started,,,all eyes were focusing to them,,,

"Ahhh yeah,,,we were surprised with that actually,,,hyun joong answered confidently,,,

"so how was that? another host asked...

"de,,,actually we don't really know each other,,,we just met few times at some shows,,,just one morning i was shocked and surprise that an article was released telling the public that youngsaeng ssi and me are in date and showed a picture kissing in a car...hyun joong furtherly elaborated.

"really,,so how was the kiss? one of the guest shouted...

"de?!!! hyun joong and young saeng answered in unison looking to the one who asked,,

"im just joking,,,the one spoke said,,,all laughed..

"so after that...you don't know each other? the host asked again trying to dig out in formation to the two,,,

"de..we don't..,,the two nodded and answered at the same time..

"anyway,,that was few months ago right? and the newspaper immediately took out that issue...anyway so hyun joongssi,,can you share now your crying moment..it is about your past love? the host said reading the note beside his seat..

"actually it was just not long time ago..actually,, i fell in love with someone,,,hyun joong started, making a glance to young saeng unnoticeable to the other guest,,

"waahhh really??!!! murmurs and talks shocking made to others...so hallyu stars can really hurts too,,one commented..

"i did and until now i had still the feelings,,it's normal to all of us,,we are still human,,we have feelings, we have the right to feel something to other whom you think you love to..we've been together for a long time but the relationship didn't work out,,,hyun joong was nearly in tears but he able to hold back the tears,,he breathed deeply,,

"i think you were hurt a lot,,one of the host commented...

"i will be a liar if i said im not,,until now,,i still love the person,,it was hard on our part, we are both committed but then because of a situation,,

"what situation is that..a questioned was brought again..

"it's a family thing,,it's an agreement between famlies,,at first i was against on that,,,butbecause it was the elders wish we granted it and tried at first but everyday we were falling to each other,,our own lovelife was set aside,,i admit it i fell to that person but that person can't admit and accept it to himself..hyun joong revealed his feelings...

Young saeng was silent, listening,,he doesn't want to hear anything,,,the words that was brought by the other makes his heart suffer,,his partner knows the opposite,,only his heart knows the truth,,hyun joong knows that saengie can't admit the fact that he was fell inlove too but for saengie, he was sure he was inlove with him too..

"so what happen now? did you both separated?

"hyun joong nodded,,he smiled weakedly,,that person is just around,hearing my words,,,hyun joong said giving a quick glance to his beside...

"maybe after this show that person will realize how much you love him....alright,,before you give a message to that person,let us see young saengssi,, you've mention your first hardships before your current,,can we just talk about that first one,,,it was kinda similar with hyun joong ssi's case so maybe we could also talk about it...

"de? saengie thought for a moment before giving a response,,his hardships is not actually about his heartbroken thing,,it was supposedly that but was changed when he knew that hyun joong will be in the same show,,but now, the host brought it,,,finally he nodded,,seems had no choice but to talk since everyone was anticipating in it too...

"ok,,,so you were broken hearted too but the thing is it was opposite on hyun joong's case,,,hyun joong ssi admitted his feelings and in your case, you can't actually tell it or shouted it...can you tell us the truth behind it?

"ahhh de..i,,i,,was so frustrated, i fell slowly with that person without my knowing, i have my girlfriend too that time but then im falling to other person,,we were together everyday and so our feelings molded and became love,,but i can't confess it or admit it,,i don't want to hurt my current girlfriend that time, but then it hurts me thinking about my confused feeling to the other...

"owhh that was ridiculous,,you just have tobreak with your current and go to the present...

"i don't know i was in trouble and debate,,i was asking myself,,will i do the right thing? will i be fair if i follow my feelings? will i be happy with my decision? am i sure with my feelings or i was just hook with the care that i am recieving that time,,..youngsaeng tears finally escaped,, he sighed...

"so this is the question,,,since you both already parted and maybe that person is watching,,do you love that person?you said you were confusedor you can't just say it loud what your heart is saying...do you love the person?

"saengie nodded and lowered his head,, yes i think i love that person,,i actually broke up with my current girlfriend because of my  feelings to the other, i became so much unfair to my current that i hurt her so much,,,

"waahhhh,,so that was what love can do..both of you really suffered with your own heart,,,

"but then why you didn't just accept your partner's feelings and you just kept it to yourself? hyun joong let out a question to young saeng..all anticipated, waiting for the response,,

"saengie just smiled,,because i thought the feelings will gone after we separated,,our relationship is not that serious actually at first,,we agreed into it,and we will be separated in no time and goes back with our own relationship to our girlfriends...

"if you love that person,,,you just have to admit it right? you said you love that person..in this world love is just a pain,,there is just three choices,,

***first,,,break or hurt your current in order to fullfill both of your heart and be happy,

***second, both of you will stay with your current and hurt yourself because you can't get you future love,

***third,,stay away from your current and as well don't accept the future and be hurt by yourself knowing that your current is hurting and your future was hurt too, so all of you is suffering with the so called confused and undecided heart of you,,hyun joong said focusing on saengie's eyes who was panicking with his sudden questioning,,,

"eooo,,that was right,,all agreed to hyun joong..saengie was like in a hot seat,,,

"so what did you choose? young saeng ssi,,the host asked,,,

"Obviously he chose the third one,,hyun joong gave a slight smirk...

"and how'd you know what my heart was,,,yes i did a lie to my heart,i didn't accept that person and just ignore the feelings, i was hurting, i am hurting, and i broke up and hurt my girlfriend because of that feelings i have to the other,and that person is surely hurting too,,

"yes that person is hurting that much,,,hyun joong said,,both of them camer to a discussion that others and host left in awe,,eyes turn to whoever speak or answer...

"tskkkk,,,and you? why did you just leave and never fought for it? have you thought that maybe that person is just waiting for you to get and fight for your love?young saeng questioned back..

"i did but that person is too hard to get,,,hyun joong answered..

"no you didn't,,you just tried it once maybe, and you didn't really fight for your love to that person, and now you are blaming that person that you are hurting..

"im not blaming anyone...

"then,, you just had to insist your feelings to that person,,

"i do,i know that person knows it now that until now my feelings never change,,hyun joong replied,,you should have admit your feelings in the first place too,,no one died in admitting his feelings and no one died because of hurt unless you decided to kill yourself,,,he added,,,the studio gave asilent moment because of their debate...

The host clap breaking the silence,,all were now speechless,,the two fellow guest were sure be hurt and still hurting,,,alright,,before we flodded into tears and our show is nearly end,,to lessen your disaster feelings,, give your message to your love ones,,assume that they are watching right now and saw how you both had a debate on you situations,,,the host added...hyun joong ssi what do you want to say?

"De, there are three words that i always say,,,i love you, i just wish to hear my heart,,i need you,,the times we shared together,, i still can't forget them,,,i'm still waiting for you,,my heart never change and never regret in loving you until now,,if you can't really accept me, i just wish you'll be more happy in your life,..hyun  joong tears were not exempted, they fell on his cheeks,,,,

"young saeng ssi,,,the host turn to him..

"i know i became so stupid not confessing my true feelings,,for not giving you the right love for your love,,i know i chose to be hurt than hurting my girlfriend and i hurted you because of it,,i am sorry i know it was too late to say it out, but i had loveyou and i think i,,,i,,,i love you still,,,but things is different between us,,that was just a part of the hindrances that we had in order to not continue our relationship...who knows one day everything will go on as we wished for,,it was too complicated for us,,young saeng said confessing finally but didn't made a clear response whether he accept it or not...he worries too much, he worries every single detail of them being an hallyu star, the fans, their image, and other stuffs..

"alright,,thank you for your moments,,the hosts thank the guest,,,hyun joong ssi and young saeng ssi are like confessing to each other,,the host commented giving a laughed to others,,of course it was just a joke to them,,who would wonder if the two really confessing to each other,,,

The show ended both of them left a mark on the show,,they stood up from their seats, saengie avoids being in contact to the other and he excused himself immediately, racing his feet outside,,,taking out his key from his pocket and find his car...he was about to start to drive when a car blocked his way,,and his phone rang,,

Hyun joong saw saengie leaving in a rush,,he bowed to others and followed him,,they bothreach the car park, he immediately hopped in his car and blocked hte car who was about to leave the spot,,,he took out his phone and called..

"follow me,,,he said and hanf the call, he drove and lead the way,,

Just like what the other instructed, saengie followed behind the other's car,,he stopped the car as the front car stopped,,it was a playground that rare people visit,,,hyun joong step out in his car and knock to the other's car,,it was opened as soon as possible,,looking around before entering..both are silent,,,

"what do you want? saengie broke the silence

"you broke up with juhyun? hyun joong asked..

"so what?

"saengie,,you are still playing hard to get,,,why don't we just settle our relationship...

"is that what you want for me and you told me to follow you all the way here...? im busy please get out of the car...

"damn it saengie,,why are you so hard to please? you said you love me,,i love you,,can't we just live like before? hyun joong yelled..

"don't yell at me im not your husband and nothing goes between us...!!saengie yelled back...

"nothing? goes between us? after your confession on that show? do you think i will believe your lies now? your excuses? hyun joong said calming himself,, he grab the other's waist and pulled him closer,,,saengie wiggle at first until he was unable to move due to the tight grip,,inch by inch hyun joong get closer..let's see..you miss me too,,

"stop it,, someone will caught us here? saengie said pushing him...

"i don't care..you worried too much,,,hyun joong said and planted a kiss to him,,

Saengie shut his eyes,,this time, this moment,,he could admit he misses that lips that touches his,,,at the same time getting worried if paparazzi will get a shot of them right now,,will he pull out now,,will he just slap the other now, will he just~~~~ just let this moment be as it is and don't mind what will be the next day's issue for both of them?

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****finally,,lol,,i woke up late at 10:45 and err immeditely did this update quickly,,havent had my breakfast and not its lunch time,,,hope i didn't made a crap,,i had the idea the last time about how i updtae the strong heart but with my memory gap,,keke i forgot it,,my memory is not that good anymore,,i had my surgery (operation) before,,so my mom told me it's because of that, that's why i was forgetfull after that..anyway,,hope you like this,,,