Chapter 26: The new me.

I opened my eyes slowly and a big headache greeted me. I looked around and tried to find out where I was. I saw a little desk at the corner of that room and some kpop girls group posters were pasted on the wall with also a couple of soccer championship medals. Where was that place?

“Oh! You woke up” I heard a nice voice. It was that boy that worked at the coffee shop.

“Hi Sungmin!” I smiled. “Is this your house?” I asked still confused by the situation.

“Well, it’s my apartment actually. It’s very small. But it’s okay considering there are only two people living here and the rent is pretty cheap”

“It’s good” I tried to be friendly.

Yes, I know. I’m the least friendly person in this world, but I had to accept he was a nice guy. Even then, I wasn’t that excited about being into that dirty and tiny place. I wasn’t feeling bad either because I could have slept on the streets if he hadn’t been there. So, I was neutral about it.

“How did I end up here anyway?” I scratched my head thoughtful.

“We went out for drinking last night” he said and took a sip of his water bottle.

“Oh… that explains the headache and the amnesia” I muttered.

“Yes. Do you usually forget what you do when you drink?” he sat and leaned his head in sign of waiting for my answer.

“Not really, only when I drink too much” I admitted.

“Well, you drank a lot last night. I guess it was because you were sad about your ex-girlfriend” he raised his eyebrows.

“This is embarrassing” I shrugged.

“No, it’s ok. I did it too when I broke up with my girlfriend the last month” he smiled sincerely. “But dude, you really have alcohol tolerance. You drank a lot”

“Oh, I’m sorry. I guess you spent a lot of money. I’ll pay you back when I get my first fee”

“Don’t worry Youngmin-ssi. But seriously, you’re daebak! I wish I had that alcohol tolerance”

“It’s not as good as it seems. The headache is killing me and we have to go to work” I stood up.

“Oh! Yeah, you’re right”

We hurried to work and the ajumma greeted us. She looked excited about my presence there. Yesterday the coffee shop had a lot of customers because some Bestfriends (Boyfriend fans) came to support me. They encouraged me and told me to come back as a singer, but they also said that they would support me if I decided to stay as a coffee shop waiter. They were so kind.

Even though the fans encouragement helped me, I couldn’t get Sumi out of my head. The look in her eyes full of hate towards me, I just couldn’t stand it. I didn’t expect that reaction coming from her.

‘Hey! Earth calling to Youngmin, you hurt her and left her alone. How did you expect her to react?’ my conscience said making me feel worse.

A customer came in the shop. It was very early though. Sungmin approached to the cash register and stood up with his flashing seller’s smile. I walked next to him and found out that the customer was that stupid mousey friend of Piggy.

“Good morning! The same order of every day?” Sungmin cheered.

“Yes, of course” that brat smiled.

“A white chocolate-green tea latte coffee and a mocha-caramel Oreo frappe” Sungmin typed the order on the little screen of the computer.

“Yes, but for this time is to carry-out”

“Ok. Your order will be ready in some minutes. You can take a sit if you want”

 I took two paper cups and prepared the orders. I prepared the Oreo frappe with a lot of whipped cream, just like Sumi liked it. I smiled unconsciously thinking about her. I remember all those times when I scolded her about ingesting too much sugar. She would always pout and then frown saying it was her body and not mine who liked sugar.

On the other way, the Mousey’s order was… let’s say it was special. I added too much coffee so I supposed it was kind of bitter.

“Order for Changbum” I said out loud. The mousey came for his order.

“Thanks”. He muttered without even looking at me.

“Mocha Caramel Oreo Frappe… she hasn’t changed his preferences in coffee. I made it with extra whipped cream just as she likes it” I smirked.

“Don’t think that because you know her favorite drink, you know everything about her. It’s stupid” he glared at me with piercing eyes.

This guy really hated me. I gulped. But not because I was intimidated by him, it was because I was upset by his words. How could he say I didn’t know Sumi?

“Why didn’t she come today? Is she busy with the drama filming?” I asked trying to ignore his bad comment.

“Isn’t it obvious? She said it serious Youngmin. She doesn’t want to see you…ever again. So, you better stay away from her”

“I know she doesn’t want to see me now. But I can’t stay away from her… not until she forgives me” I crossed my arms.

“She already forgave you. The only thing she wants to do is to go on with her life. You should do that too”

“I want her in my life” I stated.

“But she doesn’t want you in hers” he rolled his eyes. I felt my heart got ripped at that moment.

“How do you know it? I won’t believe in your words till I hear it from Sumi”

“You’ll have to hear it only from me. I won’t let you to get close to Sumi. I’m serious”. Pff! That stupid brat, did he really think he could threaten me?

“Oh! Really? Are you that nervous that I can make her fall for me again?” I raised a brow.

“You’re so immature. This is not about me, it’s about her. I don’t want you to hurt her again. I won’t let you make her shed any more tears. And I don’t want you to get close to her because the only thing you had brought to her life is pain. Now she’s going on with her life. I won’t let you ruin that” He pursed his lips and made a fist with his hands.

“I know I hurt her. But I also know I’m the only one who can heal her wounds. I want to make her know that I was wrong. I want her to know that I was the one who made mistakes, not her. I don’t want her to shed any tear either. I worry about her, more than what you think”

“Then let her go. That’s the only way she’s going to be happy. Believe me Youngmin, every time she sees you, she remembers all what you used to be and she gets hurt again. So please, stay away from her. I know you worry about her but…”

“No. I’m not going to do that. My perspective about caring about someone is different from yours. I won’t leave from her side, not ever again. I came here to stay, and you’d better make that idea” I turned my back to him. I was so upset about everything.

“Then I guess you’ll have to hear it from her lips, because she won’t let you get in her life. She told me that”

My face reddened of anger towards myself. I couldn’t say anything else. I just stood up there watching that brat leave. I was so mad at myself that I couldn’t state anything at my defense. But he was probably right… what if Sumin didn’t want me in her life anymore? What was I supposed to do then?

The day passed by and I found myself more depressed than yesterday. Maybe Changbum was right about me being away from her. After all, it’s been three years and she should be probably happy and fine without me. Why to ruin that only because I feel miserable? I had to stop being that selfish.

I headed to Boyfriend’s apartment after leaving the coffee shop. Kwangmin greeted me and we went out for a walk.

“So, you found a new job as a waiter? Youngmin you can find something better than that” he chuckled.

“I know. I’ll try to look for something else. But at least I won’t be dying of hunger till I do that” I looked down.

“What’s wrong? You look sad” he palmed my shoulder.

“I don’t know. Maybe after all, what I did was worthless” I looked up wishing I could see the stars.

“Hyung, don’t say that. You’ll see you’ll find Sumi and you’ll be happy ever after”

“I met her yesterday…”

“Really? Omo! Then why are you so sad?” he tilted his head puzzled.

“She doesn’t want to see me again Kwangmin. She hates me. And she has the right to do it”

“It was the first impression. And maybe she was pretty shocked because she expected you to be married at this time. She’ll forgive you right away. You’ll just have to be patient. Because it’s not going to be easy”

“I know. But the thing is I don’t want to do that because of me. Maybe she’s happy now. She has probably forgotten about me and is living her life successfully. I don’t want to ruin that only because I can’t forget about her. I should stop being that selfish”

“Woah! She has really changed you hyung, in a positive way of course. The thing is, what if she still misses you as much as you do? What if her feelings towards you are still there hidden in her heart? What if you are the only one that can make her happy after all?”

“You don’t know Kim Sumi. She’s strong enough to forget about some stupid feelings for a jerk” I scoffed.

“You don’t know it yet. Don’t give up before trying. Of course if you are here is because you want both of you to be happy. You’re not being selfish. You’re just in love with her and want to be by her side. That’s normal. And if it doesn’t work, well, at least you will know you tried it.”

“I just don’t want to hurt her again. I don’t want her to shed any tear because of me. I’m afraid I might make her feel bad” my voice cracked.

“You won’t, because you love her. And you don’t want to hurt her. Why would you do it then?”

“Because that’s what I do better. Hurt the people I love” I said with a cold voice.

“I know what you do better Youngmin. Protect the ones you love. Like I said, I cannot guarantee you it’s going to be easy because you treated her bad when she didn’t deserve it. But I know also Sumi could see that sweet and protective side of you. That’s why she fell for you. Believe me; she’s too intelligent to fall for a complete jerk”

“I don’t know what to do anymore”

“Be there for her whenever she needs someone to talk. Be there whenever she needs a shoulder to lean on and even whenever she needs someone to blame. Be there always for her. Show her that you love her, but not with words, but with actions”

“Yeah, you’re right. Thank you so much Kwangmin” I ruffled his hair.

“Yah! Now my hair is a mess because of you” he frowned pouting at the same time.

“Chh! You’re such a cry baby” I chuckled.

“Oh! I almost forget about it. Here’s your apartment’s key” he handed me a little gold key.

“Thanks. Now I have a place to stay”  I smiled.

“Well, hyung it’s not actually a big space. I looked around the city for apartments but there wasn’t any available. Strangely most of the buildings are in remodeling process. Isn’t it weird?” He twisted his mouth.

“It’s called bad luck. At least that’s what I want to believe. I don’t want to think mom is involved in this” I puffed my cheeks with air.

“I don’t think so. That would be so crazy. Anyway, I finally found a place but it’s very small and quite old. So the construction has some cracks and needs to be painted. We’ll repair it for sure in the future”

“I don’t have another option” I sighed. “But thank you anyway for taking the time to get me a place to stay”

“You don’t need to thank me. That’s what brothers are for” he smiled sincerely. “It’s getting cold. I’ll take you to your new apartment if you want so”

“That would be nice.” I smiled.

Kwangmin took me to my new apartment. It was awful. I couldn’t believe I was going to stay there but I had no other choice.

I didn’t know why but I had the feeling that my mom was behind this. I thought maybe she paid people so they wouldn’t rent Kwangmin an apartment. Even then, I wasn’t going to give up. I had to hang on. Sumi was my strength after all.

I made some ramen and sat down to eat alone. I sighed and wrapped myself with a big blanket. It was so cold and the room didn’t have heating.

I thought about a way to get close to Sumi again. Then, an idea came to my mind. I read in her profile that she was attending to Seoul University. Even though idols don’t go often to school because of their schedules, at least I would be able to see her some days if I applied there.

The cold breeze froze my body. I shivered. Jo Youngmin, if you hadn’t fallen for Kim Sumi your life would be easier. You would be at a big room with soft silk blankets and wouldn’t be dying of cold. Probably your dinner would have been a beef steak instead of ramen and your mom wouldn’t be denying you as her son. But again… you would probably never get to know what true love is.

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Sorry for bad Grammar. I hadn't written in a while so I lost practice in English Grammar. Hope You understand :(

I hope you like this chapter. It's more about Youngmin's life for now but the next chapters will be about Sumi and Youngmin's story again.

Don't forget to leave your comments below.

Oh! And there's good news..... BOYFRIEND IS COMING TO MY COUNTRY!

Yes, I  never believed it was actually possible, but Boyfriend is coming to Mexico. And I'll see them in person soon.

ANDSJA I'm sooo excited. :D

Thanks for reading. ^^

Ppyong!