PRECIOUS.

I couldn't wait to see Lu Han-oppa again.

But on the other hand I was too afraid to see how he would react.

I bet that he'll be disappointed. 

Sahee, you're stupid.

In class I always looked over to his place, but he didn't look up from his book.

I knew, that he wasn't reading it. Not the book or any of the text the teacher handed us.

His eyes were moving uncontrollable over the words and he knew it.

He knew that I was watching him.

I went to Baekhyun in the biology class. He was sitting right next to me.

"Baekhyun-ssi?" I asked and he looked up, a bit confused and irritated.

He didn't answer and looked back on his paper again. 

"I just wanted to say, that I am very sorry about everything what happened."

I took a seat next to him, but Baekhyun just looked at me, still confused.

"I can understand, if you don't want to have anything to do with me. 
It's just... I've not... I've gone through a quite hard time, though.
So... I hope you can forgive me, Baekhyun-ssi."

Baekhyun looked at me and his facial expressions began to soften a bit. 

"Of course I can forgive you," he said and gently pat my shoulder. "Don't worry."

Lunch break. Lu Han was standing under the oak tree, but he wasn't reading.

His eyes were fixed on something and he looked quite concentrated and a bit absent.

My hands trembled, but there wasn't a place to hide them.

I had the feeling to tear up every step I made closer to Lu Han.

How would he react? He wouldn't even forgive me for being so dismissive.

I would not forgive myself either.

I was now standing some meters away. I couldn't move any closer.

Tears began to fill my eyes and I almost fell on my knees.

"Lu Han," I said quietly, because my voice began to fade away.

His eyes met mine. They looked so sad. So disappointed.

"Please... I am sorry. You don't have to ... forgive me."

The words only came out slowly and quietly.

My face began to get wet and I smudged the tears all over my face with my hands.

"And I would be okay with that. Because I ... I ... wasn't myself the past weeks."

I sobbed and rubbed my eyes. I just wanted to punch myself.

"I know and I can understand if you hate me now. Because you have the right to."

My sight was blurred because of my tears. I took some short breaths.

"And I just wanted to say... that ... I don't ...

I don't really ...

deserve such a great person like you."

I turned around. He shouldn't see me like that any longer.

I should leave now.

I made some trembling steps.

One.

Two.

"I am sorry, Lu Han-oppa." 

"Don't."

I slowly turned around.

His warm arms were wrapped around my body and hold it tightly.

"Don't. Stop crying."

I looked up, my sight was still blurred. 

But I could recognize his handsome face.

He cupped my face and wiped my tears with his thumbs.

"You don't have to do this," he said calmly. "Please stop crying."

I still sobbed. My hands hold onto his wrists. 

"I want to see your beautiful eyes. Your tears make it hard for me to see them."

"How can you just... forgive me like that?

Why don't you hate me for being like that?"

"How could I ever hate the most precious person in my life?"

Lu Han looked into my eyes and I could see that he was hurt. He was sad.

He bend down and placed a kiss on my lips.

I don't deserve a person like you.

∞

please don't forget do leave a comment ^^
yes! almost 50 subscribers ^__^ thank you so much!!