Mi Kyong’s POV

Tonight was the last night at the SMBC competition, after the awards ceremony tomorrow night, we would be heading back to Korea.  We had just handed in our final project and were enjoying some free time in the room after finishing packing everything.

“So like this?” I ask Jonghyun.

“No no, you have to press down the strings a little harder than that.” He says and I make a face.

“Ouch, my fingers hurt.” I say.

“Yeah, it hurts at first, but then you develop calluses, then it won’t hurt.” Jonghyun says.

“Oh, okay.” I say.

“Now try strumming again.” He says and I strum across the strings, an ugly dissonant chord sounds through the room, both him and I wince. “Strum through each string once to see which string you aren’t playing down all the way.” He suggests and I do so. I pluck the E string. “No no, that one is supposed to be open, that means you don’t play it.” He says.

“Oh, alright.” I say.

“Try the chord again, without the E string this time.” He says and I do so, this time a slightly off tune major chord. “Not bad.” Jonghyun says, grinning, giving me a thumbs up. “There you go! Now you know G, D, Em and C! You could play a simple song now.” He says.

“Thanks.” I say and I smile back. He looks into my eyes and I suddenly realize how close in proximity we are. He looks into my eyes and then down at my lips, he slowly moves in and my eyes widen. I quickly take off the guitar and hand it to him. “Er, thanks for the lessons, I’m going to go take a shower now.” I say, quickly grabbing my clothes and heading into the bathroom. I let go of a breath I didn’t know I was holding and I sigh, muttering to myself,

“What did you almost get yourself into there Mi Kyong? Weak. You’re so weak.” I the shower and sat on the toilet covering, rubbing my eyebrows thinking about how I almost, almost, kissed my sister’s boyfriend yet again. I would’ve been cheating on Taemin! Have I really become such a shameless vixen? I ask myself. Yes. A small voice inside of me answers, and I realize that I need to change. I can’t spend my time wanting, coveting something I can’t have. It’s just, he teases me with the prospects of having him and every time he’s within grasp, something or someone just pulls him away. I shake the thoughts out of my head, figuring I’ve wasted water long enough and I pull off my clothes and step into the shower. Showers are honestly great places to think, its so loud that it blocks out all the other noise, and because its so loud, your mind also blocks it out.

“What are you doing to me Jonghyun? I can barely take this anymore.” I whisper to myself, knowing no one will hear me. I let the warm water run through my hair, letting all my worries drain with the water. Water, it has the power to heal but it also has the power to harm. Just like Jonghyun. The times I’ve spent with him, I’ve been so happy and it feels like I’m in another world, he just clicks with me in a way that no one has ever before. Then there are the times when he hurts me so bad and he opens wound after wound, after wound. Is the trade off worth it? I honestly don’t know, but I’m starting to think no, it’s not worth it. I turned off the water and dried myself off, getting dressed and then drying my hair. I walked out of the bathroom and saw Jonghyun passed out on the bed. I saw a little note on my pillow and opened it.

               Dear Mi Kyong,
I think you’re beautiful.
            From,
Jonghyun.

I almost choked. I grabbed my bag and the note and ran up to the roof. When I was out in the safety of open air, I grabbed my lighter and set the note on fire. Who do you think you are Jonghyun? You reel me in and then you steal my heart. This was the last straw. I have to get over him. I can’t stay like this forever, because in the end it’ll be me who gets hurt. What kind of sappy love story is this? I didn’t think these things even existed in real life, and here I am, tied up in some kind of fantasy in my head.

“Excuse me, miss.” I hear a male voice call behind me.

“Oh, sorry, I was just leaving.” I say, making sure the fire was out completely.

“Don’t worry, I was just asking if you dropped this.” He says, holding out the purse I had left out in the hallway after I pulled the lighter out.

“Yes, thank you so much.” I say to him.

“No problem, Kevin.” He says, sticking out his hand for me to shake.

“Mi Kyong.” I answer, shaking his hand back.

“So where are you from Mi Kyong?” He asks.

“South Korea, and you?” I ask as he comes over and stands with me by the edge of the roof, looking out at the city.

“I lived there until I was 10.” He says (A/N: Yes I know Kevin didn’t live in Korea until he was 10, he was raised in California, don’t worry Kiss Mes, I’ve done my research. ;) )and I look at him shocked.

“Wow, your Korean is really good!” I compliment and he laughs.

“Says the girl speaking fluent English.” He says and I blush.

“So were you here for the competition?” I ask and he nods. “Same.” I reply and we fall into a comfortable silence.

“I hope you don’t mind me asking, but why is it that you’re up here all by your lonesome on such a night?” He asks me and I look at his face, seeing concern in his eyes.

“It’s a long story.” I say, sighing.

“I’ve got time.” He says and surprisingly, I told my entire life story to some guy that barely knew. Amazing it was, telling all of these things to a guy that didn’t know my past, didn’t know my background and couldn’t judge me on those things. After I told him the entire story, we stayed in silence for a few minutes.

“Wow.” He says.

“Yeah.” I reply.

“You want to know what I think?” He asks.

“I’d love to know.” I say.

“I think you shouldn’t give up on Jonghyun, it sounds like you two really were meant to end up with each other, but you shouldn’t start or continue anything with him until he’s got his together and you’ve cleaned things up with Taemin and your sister.” He says.

“I’ve thought of that.” I say.

“You know Mi Kyong, if you truly love him, you’ll want him to be happy right? So if he’s happy with you that means its meant to be but if he’s happy with Mi Cha, you just need to let him go.” Kevin says and suddenly, I realize that’s exactly what I needed to hear.

“Thanks so much Kevin-sshi!” I say ecstatically.

“No problem.” He says, chuckling. “I’m going to be going to bed now, goodnight Mi Kyong-sshi, I hope we meet again, sometime in the future. Don’t forget your purse.” He says chuckling and I watch his retreating figure. I stay up on the roof a few minutes longer before I grab my stuff and go inside as well. I snuggle into bed, resetting up the barrier of pillows and then drift off into a dreamless sleep.

“Wake up!” Jonghyun calls, shaking me lightly.

“Mmm, five more minutes.” I say, rolling back over and burying my face in my pillow, what a