You were my mom, you were my dad

The only thing I only had was you, it's true

And even when the times got hard

you were there to let us know that we'd get through

you taught me how to understand the things people do

And I thank you, I'll always thank you

More than you would know, more than I could show

 

ALTHEA RYZ FAJARDO

 

 

It has been a month.   Everything is still fresh on my mind. His face, his smile, even his scent. I couldn't forget him.   But I left him. It was for the best. I shouldn't stay with him. It would ruin his career. I love him too much that I'd rather remain as his fan, as one of all the girls loving him from the crowd. It's better if I am just one of those who patiently wait for his group's comeback, spazz when his teaser photo is revealed, wait til midnight for the release of their album, spends money to buy albums overseas and die while watching their perfs.   I continued my residency training. I'm starting my second year of residency in the Department of Surgery. It's back to painful reality. I tried so hard to work like everything never happened. Pretend that I'm alright, that I don't miss him badly.  

In a week, Super Junior would have their comeback with 7jib and teaser photos were revealed without Leeteuk and Yesung who are having their military service. Leeteuk remains at the dorm because like Heechul, he is only rendering public service. Yesung, like Kangin, is staying at the military camp. Heechul has already comeback from his military service. The 7jib concept is constellation, wherein their main color is silver. Donghae's teaser photo would be released tomorrow midnight KST or 11PM in Singapore.

 

I had to wake up early for my 7AM shift in the hospital. I just prepared toast and egg for breakfast because I was not feeling well. I wondered why. I took a quick shower and put on blue silky blouse and black pants. I check my bag if I forgot anything. When everything was set, I started having breakfast with milk. 

 

As I was eating, I felt really uncomfortable. I feel a little dizzy but I believe this is just the result of lack of sleep since I came back wherein I had to do some papers and readings regarding my patients. I had to read several disease entities that could be the possible diagnoses of my patients so I had only four to five hours of sleep every night. 

 

I left the house after an hour of preparation and rushed to the subway. It was still early so there were few people. I felt glad because I usually feel dizzy with so many people around me. 

 

I arrived at Singapore General Hospital 15 minutes before the time. After I logged in, I went directly to the doctor's quarters and got changed. I went to the Surgical ward to assess the patient who was scheduled to have a craniectomy for his meningioma. After my preoperative assessment, the patient was brought to the operating room and was prepared for the surgery. When the head neurosurgeon arrived, I scrubbed in.  The surgery started at 8:30 in the morning and it was such a long surgery. I was not really feeling well but I had to remain standing and assist in the surgery for me to learn and not disappoint my head surgeon. I was glad that he was not really stressing me out as he taught me what he believes I need to learn. The surgery ended at four in the afternoon. I still had to do postoperative monitoring to the patient.

 

I felt dizzy already due to hypoglycemia. My stomach was already making a loud noise because of intense hunger. I rushed to the cafeteria and had my lunch. I was already having a migraine attack triggered by hunger and stress. I went to the doctors' quarters and rested. I my laptop and checked my facebook and twitter.

 

I saw a news posted on twitter on Super Junior's comeback performance schedule at Music Core, Music Bank and Inkigayo this weekend. I became too excited to watch their live performances especially Donghae's dance moves which could always knock me off my feet. I read my emails and sent my replies. I also read about my case because I would