The day of Seulgi’s accident 

Seulgi woke up feeling heavy. It’s not the first time that she did, in fact, she was like this each and every day. To be honest she is getting tired of this set-up. Always feeling lonely even if she has a “wife” to talk to or even spend some time with.

How she wished she could really spend the day normally with Irene. A day filled with laughter and casual conversation. Just like when we were younger. Before we fell apart.

She glanced at her tiny alarm clock on the bedside table and just sigh when she found out that it’s already 9 o’clock. She overslept, or it’s appropriate to say, she spends almost the entire night just drowning over her overwhelming thoughts about how it’s been like ever since she got married. It’s almost sunrise when exhaustion forced her body to shut down and rest. While her mind started running around in circles.   So yeah, she overslept which means that she cannot do her morning jog anymore. Heaving another sigh, probably her fiftieth time for the day, she just stretched her limbs, creating a popping sound once she moved her joints which can make anyone who hears it cringe. Then, she went to her walk-in closet, choosing some comfortable clothes as she planned to just be in her studio since she will just finish a panting that she will include in her exhibit next month. She took a quick shower and went out of her room once done.

Stark silence welcomed her as soon as she stepped foot into the living room. It is not that new since Seulgi knows that her wife Irene already left to go to the office a few hours earlier. It is not that shocking and to be honest, Seulgi is already used to it. But getting used to it does not mean that she did not wish for a thousand times that she could change it. It’s just that, Seulgi never had the courage, out of fear of facing the rejection and anger of Irene. Because experiencing such could further damage her already frail and broken heart.

“Good morning Mistress Kang.” One of their maids greeted her, snapping her back to reality. She just gave a small nod in acknowledgment, not in the mood for small talks. She took a seat at the dining table, dreading another meal filled with loneliness. As soon as she is seated, the flock of maids then started preparing her breakfast which she silently ate. It took her about fifteen minutes to finish her meal, opting to be done as soon as possible to try and ease the heavy air surrounding her. Besides the sooner she finished, the sooner she could get out of the house, the sooner she can get to her gallery, the sooner she can escape her sad reality and get lost in that make-believe world she in her head and her art.

 She was just putting the cutleries down when her phone started ringing. Upon hearing the familiar tone, she specifically assigned for her secretary, she did not bother looking at it and just swiped it to the right before placing the device on her ear.

“Good Morning Wan.” She greeted the person on the line.

Wendy Son is someone whom she treasured the most. She is one of her oldest friends and one of the few who saw her at her worst yet stuck with her until the end. Wendy has been there when she felt her whole world collapsed on her. She, together with the rest of Seulgi’s gang is the one who never left her side when she lost Irene or rather when Irene tossed her aside and left her devastated, almost on the verge of losing everything; her whole being included.

“Good morning Seul. I just want to inform you that Mr. Chen already finalized the purchase of three of your paintings and the money is already wired into your account. I also gave the checks to Hope Foundation you asked me for yesterday. They are ending their deep gratitude for your continued support for their cause.” Wendy went on breaking Seulgi’s trip deep inside her thoughts.

“Oh, and by the way, Joy asked me to tell you that Ms. Irene flew to New York this morning for a business trip and to personally manage the expansion projects of your hotels there. She said that they might stay there for 3 weeks and she also warned me that your wife asked her not to disturb her during those times no matter how urgent it would be. She will be so busy and would not be able to take any calls whether personal or business-related.

Upon hearing such a statement, she felt a pang in her heart. Something that she is so used to feeling yet could never really get used to.

She can never get used to feeling unimportant and unappreciated. Something that Irene seems to be reminding her off over and over again.

Typical Irene. Would not even spare a minute of her time to inform me of her plans or whereabouts. She would ask Joy, her secretary to relay to Wendy whatever she wants me to know.

Seulgi said in her mind. They have been like this ever since they got married. It’s a miracle to even say a complete sentence to each other when outside of the public eye. Maybe that’s the reason why they stay married for this long. Seulgi never asked about Irene’s work or anything while she does the same. It is the job of their secretaries to inform both of them what the other is up to, and they did it in case the public will ask either of them about their spouse. In short, they are just keeping tabs on each other just for the sake of maintaining that perfect couple act.  But doing this kind of pretense for the past three years has taken its toll on Seulgi. To be honest, she is slowly starting to get tired of such a setup. She couldn’t count how many times she has wished for something different. Getting torn between continuing their sham of marriage just to be near Irene and just walking away from everything, starting anew somewhere far, and removing the girl from her life completely. She took a deep breath first, hoping that the influx of oxygen can somehow alleviate the heaviness that is starting to settle in her chest. But who is she kidding, doing so just made it difficult for her?

Breathing or more appropriately, trying her hardest to merely survive can never ease the emptiness inside her.

Nothing ever does.

The irony of it all is that, Joohyun who the very reason for her existence before has now become the bane of it.

She smiled bitterly before realizing that she’s spacing out again. So she returned her attention to the person on the other line before speaking.

“Okay, I get it. You can take the day off today Wan since I’ll just be at my studio the whole day. Thanks.” Seulgi heaved a sigh once she got Wendy’s response. She then glanced at her bookshelf, to her secret journal hidden inside of it, while her hand unconsciously played with the necklace hanging on her neck. She then s