He hated knowing that he was leaving tomorrow during school, that he’d drop her off at her classroom and smile as though nothing was wrong, before coming home and leaving her life. In a sense, he felt selfish for the decision despite how selfless it was, considering she didn’t deserve to not know, but he also couldn’t bring himself to tell her. Tonight however, he held her just a while longer, just a little tighter, allowed his touch to linger just a moment more, to feel her skin beneath his fingertips. He’d miss it, but her smile and happiness were worth every moment he’d be without her.

“I love you” she whispered, and his body froze instantly, for she was never the one to initiate the word, he’d always have to prompt it from her, and sometimes she would simply deny him of the pleasure of hearing that sweet voice speak such beautiful words.

“I love you” Jungkook answered, wiggling his fingers between hers if only to hold her hand closer, to eliminate any space that stood between them.

He wouldn’t have left if there was another way, but considering she refused his suggestion just as quickly as he threw it out there, it proved that her future meant more to her. He didn’t blame her, his future and his dreams meant just as much to him, but somehow Sang-Oh had meant more. She was the sunshine behind his raining days, the umbrella to keep him dry and warm during the harsh storm. She was the hand that pulled him out of the misery, to smile at him as though nothing was wrong, as though he wasn’t cruel.

‘How am I going to live without your smile… Now that I already saw it… How can I possibly hope to forget it…’ Jungkook was in his own mind, but his eyes continued to gaze at the beauty in his arms. Her smile staying firm against her lips as she ran her free hand over his knuckles, sending a fire through his arm. How he wished they could stay locked like this forever, he wouldn’t move a muscle if he could stay, but all good things came to an end… This was theirs.

“Do you think Jimin likes you?” Jimin would be a good person to date, considering how responsible he was and how much he protected Sang-Oh, even before she was close to Jungkook.

“Yeah if I was Min Yoongi” Sang chuckled which confused Jungkook, he didn’t understand…. Wait… Wait what!? Jimin is dating… That make’s so much sense now… “Why do you ask that weird question?”

“No reason… What about Taehyung?” Sure, he was immature, but that didn’t mean that his heart was small, in fact sometimes Jungkook wondered if his chest could hold such a large organ. He was sweet and caring, goofed around a lot which was good. Sang needed laughter in her life.

“Stop it” Sang whispered, and something about the way she spoke the words made Jungkook freeze instantly, his heart dropping into the pit of his stomach, and his tears that were once at bay, were fighting once again to be seen. “Stop doing that… I only want you…”

‘You can’t have you Sang-Oh…’ Jungkook thought silently ‘but I’ll love you from afar…’

“I was just asking” he smiled despite how much he hurt, but when her smile didn’t return to her lips instead, he pondered if he had pushed to far. “You better only want me” he teased, but her expression didn’t want to change, her eyes locked with his own, and he could hear his heart throbbing and breaking, like glass shattering inside a silent room. “I love you Sang… You’re my oxygen, I already told you that. I can’t breathe without you.”

‘Please don’t doubt yourself when I leave… You’re everything beautiful’ he thought silently and was thankful when a smile finally took her lips once more. “Come here” she whispered, his eyebrow raising at the sudden request, considering their bodies were pressed tightly against one another, but didn’t have to ask questions when her hand ran against his jawline, pulling him softly towards her own lips. He attacked those perfect lips, knowing that it was the last time he could, thankful that she didn’t push him away from his eagerness.

If it was up to him, he would have married her without even thinking, considering Sang-Oh became his reason for trying again. It was her soft lips and warm heart that managed to break away the ice that shielded him from the world. Even after he was so cruel towards her, she would smile and continue to try her best to be kind to him, to someone who probably didn’t even deserve to feel her beautiful love. It didn’t last forever, it was only an instant in his long lifetime, but he would remember the feeling of her love for the rest of his life.

“You’ll fight for me, right?” She whispered while breaking the kiss, Jungkook nodding, already planning to give up his future so that she can have her own. “You won’t leave me because of other people… right?” She whispered, and he nodded once again, and at that moment he would have complied to any demand she made, no matter how crazy or harmful it could be towards himself.

“Right now, however, can’t I just love you while I have the chance?” He whispered the words she once spoke to him, her eyes growing slightly wide as she stared at him, a nod soon taking her head before capturing his lips once more, but he pulled away first this time, closing his eyes and resting his forehead against hers, breathing in that beautiful scent and etching it into his mind, wishing he could keep it at his side.

“I want more…” her shy voice caused his eyes to flutter to an open, noting the bright blush that suddenly claimed her cheeks, his heart racing within his chest at an unhealthy pace. He understood her intentions, but knew that he couldn’t give into them, he’d never be able to leave her side should he allow them to become closer.

“We should sleep, we have school tomorrow” he whispered, breathless almost.

“We have our entire life to sleep…”

“We have our entire lives together” he expressed, before flipping back onto his back, trying to keep his thoughts at bay before he would lose control, before he would give into his desires and love her further. It would kill him, he would be lifeless when leaving her side, he couldn’t allow it to happen.

“Fine” Sang breathed softly “have it your way…” Jungkook didn’t have time to protest her actions for soon he found her legs on either side of his waist, her lips pressed onto his own and her body weight pressing his further into the bed.

He never would have guessed that his first time would have felt so amazing, hearing her breathing under him and knowing that every noise that left her lips was because of his doing. He didn’t know that he could love her this much more, that his heart would have melted as quickly as it had and that he’d be a complete mess beside her. Yet despite jumping into the unknown, he wouldn’t have taken it back, for it had been more meaningful than anything else in his life.

His heart raced for Sang-Oh, and soon his heart would break for her too.

All was worth it…

(( Next update will most likely be a double one, the very next one being a mature one, expressing their first time, and the second one will continue the story and the general plot. Thanks for staying with me!! ))