세븐틴: Delusional

 

         As promised, Jeonghan would write diaries. Every time he was up for his check up, he always bring those small notebooks with him.

 

One day, Jeonghan was out. He went to their office and talk to the CEO about things that he needed to report as promised. Then, right after, he needed to host an event with Choi Minki as per Yo Han’s request.

 

-SEBONG’S DORM-

 

         Meanwhile, Seungkwan, Mingyu, and The8 were cleaning the house after a long time, since they were busy with things like preparing for their comeback.

 

 Seungkwan was in charge of changing on of their rooms, including Jeonghan’s bed sheet that time.

 

While removing the bed sheet, something jumped over the bed after pulling the fabric off the mattress. It startled the poor boy, and so he checked. He looked at the unidentified flying object which he didn’t recognize immediately since it flew out of nowhere, Seungkwanrella found it on the floor and picked it up after he changed Jeonghan’s mattress.

 

         The cute chubby boy was supposed to return it immediately, but he got curious and opened it. He noticed that in every page, dates were written. Of course, first thing that comes into Seungkwan’s mind was… the notebook was allotted as a diary.

 

The curious kid never fails to dive into temptation. Although, he knew that he shouldn’t read it, he still continued looking through it.

 

         The boy promised himself that after reading the first page, he would close and leave it where it was supposed to be; however, he did the opposite. After finishing the first page, he flipped another page, then another, then another until he’s done reading the whole notebook.

 

It made him sad.

 

It turned out that that notebook was Jeonghan’s latest diary and it contained his latest misery and unbearable pains.

 

What made Seungkwan sadder was, Jeonghan never told anything to them- that he’s suffering day and night, literally every single day.

 

The poor boy felt so guilty and down discovering how painful Jeonghan’s sickness had become. He was already miserable. However, one side of him couldn’t help himself to feel slightly angry because Jeonghan promised that he’d inform them everything, instead, he was still keeping it from them.

 

After one notebook, he tried to find the others since he assumed that he had a lot of them.

 

As soon as he scanned Jeonghan’s bed, he discovered small notebooks underneath the mattress. They were quite several of them. Without thinking twice, he got some and started reading it quietly.

 

It took him some time to finish and internalize everything that was written on Jeonghan’s journal and stopped reading when he finished his 5^th book.

 

On the other hand, the other cleaning boys wondered where he could be gone because they couldn’t see Seungkwan for a while. Mingyu came looking for him and finally opened their room. Seungkwan was startled upon the sudden sound and panicked. Fortunately, he already kept those tiny notebooks, so Mingyu wouldn’t ask.

 

Mingyu:

Ya, what keeps you so long?

 

Seungkwan:

I was changing the bed sheet and I already swept underneath the mattress.

 

         Mingyu noticed that Seungkwan was uneasy and not focused at all. Well, who would be able to focus after discovering something sad and bothering (some were cute though)? Jeonghan’s journal contained all his feelings, including his secrets and insights about everything in his everyday life.

 

         Seungkwan was spacing out, so Mingyu called him again.

 

Mingyu:

Seungkwanie, what’s wrong?

 

Seungkwan:

Oh- oh! Nothing.

(Forced a smile)

I’m just…

(Looking for an excuse)

I’m just hungry.

 

         Mingyu observed him. He knew that he was not hungry with that troubled pale and problematic expression. It bothered him for a while, but anyway, Seungkwan would let them know if it was really bothering him. He left the boy like that and started cooking.

 

         Meanwhile, Seungkwan went standby at the couch on their living room. He was deeply thinking of something; though, the others wouldn’t know how serious it was at the moment, since Seungkwan seemed not in the right mood to be disturbed.

 

         At the moment, Seungkwan was reviewing everything he read. He’s so anxious and frightened reading most of them which were related to his sickness. The pain and the torture Jeonghan was experiencing were a lot more hurtful and unbearable these days compared before based on how he wrote it- almost in a surrendering manner; moreover, it was becoming more frequent. His coldness, the needle sting which was like an electric shock-according to Jeonghan, his nose bleed, nausea, headache, and many more bothering occurrences were all written painfully on his notebook. Seungkwan had also seen a droplet of blood. He assumed that his hyung’s nose bled, while he was writing, which was a sad news for them.  Furthermore, he’s trying to find a solution alone, since he didn’t want to bother them most of the time because he knew how tiring it could be to look after him always.

 

Though, the other part tells him about Jeonghan’s relationship and feelings towards each of them. It also bothered him, most likely, shocked and threatened discovering how deep their love would bring them.  Every single detail would sometimes give Seungkwan motives to kill. Nevertheless, he had no right to do anything that would prevent Jeonghan from loving a person.

 

Anyways, since he couldn’t promise not to read Jeonghan’s diary anymore, he promised himself to keep it to the bottom of his heart, otherwise, he’s dead- even flayed alive.

 

-DINNER TIME-

 

         Sebong was almost complete, except that Jeonghan was still on his way home from his prior engagements.

 

         Seungkwan remained quiet and uneasy. The boys noticed it, so they already asked what’s bothering him; however, Seungkwan won’t easily reveal it. Again, they let him be.

 

         Until one moment, after they had cleaned everything on their table, the bothered boy stayed at the kitchen, still thinking of everything written on Jeonghan’s notebook. It made him cry so badly. He felt terribly sad for his beloved hyung, so he planned to text Jeonghan and let him know that he’s just right beside him but he had no courage to do so. He was left staring blankly at his phone trying to review the things he wrote for Jeonghan.

 

         The8, who came back to get some water, noticed him. It shocked him seeing their dongsaeng cry like that. The kind hyung approached his dongsaeng with a gentle smile and a caring call- with a little teasing, so Seungkwan won’t feel pressured.

 

 

The8:

Hey, Seungkwan-ah, what’s wrong?

 

         Seungkwan panicked and wiped his tears immediately.

 

Seungkwan:

Oh!

This is nothing, hyung. I just watched a sad short film in the net. It hurts me.

(He was sobbing cutely)

 

The8:

What film is that?

 

Seungkwan:

I thought it was purely a short sad film, but it turned out to be an advertisement for insurance.

Aigoo~

How could they make me cry?

(He acted)

 

         The8 buy Seungkwan’s excuse. He really thought the reason was just like that because one time, when they were watching random videos on Youtube, they stumbled upon a short Thai film- which was really an advertisement. It was so sad, and Seungkwan had the same reaction like that. He sobbed so bad and acted cutely hurt.  

 

The8:

Don’t watch depressing movies especially when our showcase is coming near. And…

Coups hyung said prepare for the Vlive later. We’ll just wait for Hanie hyung to get back. Okay?

Enough crying now.

 

         Minghao wiped Seungkwan’s tears away.

 

Seungkwan:

Sorry, hyung I was just too emotional because of that thing.

 

The8:

(He smiled adorably)

That’s okay.

Aigoo~ so cute.

(Cupped his dongsaeng’s cheeks)

 

         When Jeonghan returned back from his scheduled engagement- actually he auditioned for a short film as a supporting actor and he got the role; though, he wasn’t sure of who were the other casts yet. They will start filming right after their comeback.

 

Anyway, after Jeonghan ate his dinner, they started filming their Vlive to say hello to their fans before their anticipated comeback.

 

         After finishing the given task, Jeonghan headed to their room and rest his tired mind and body on Cheol’s bed for a while because he was too lazy going up to his bed. Jihoon was there, but it surprised the younger one that he was being completely ignored. Their exhausted angel went straight to bed without noticing him. He’d usually greet anybody even if he’s tired. At least, look at them if was too lazy to speak and smile.

 

Jihoon:

Hyung?

 

         Jeonghan was surprised.

 

Jeonghan:

Kkamchagiya!

Hoonie~ you’re here?

(He peaked on Jihoon’s place.)

 

Jihoon:

Yeah.

Haven’t you noticed?

 

Jeonghan:

Sorry, I’m sleepy.

 

Jihoon:

Don’t tell me, you have blurry vision again despite wearing your glasses?

 

Jeonghan:

(He giggled)

Nothing to hide, Hoonie~

But don’t worry… I’ll be fine.

 

Jihoon:

Okay. Rest your body for a while.

(He smiled)

Want me to stay here?

 

Jeonghan:

It’s up to you.

(He smiled)

I will just nap. Call me when they are finish taking their showers.

 

Jihoon:

Sure.

(He smiled)

I trust you, hyung.

Just call us immediately if you feel something strange.

 

Jeonghan:

Sure thing, my Hoonie…

Come here.

Pull me up.

 

Jihoon:

I thought you’re going to sleep?

 

Jeonghan:

Are you busy?

 

Jihoon:

Not really?

 

Jeonghan:

Then, can I have a favour?

 

Jihoon:

Just tell me.

 

Jeonghan:

Can you be my pillow for a while?

(He smiled)

 

Jihoon:

I don’t mind.

(He smirked)

 

         Jeonghan went close to Jihoon’s tiny but reliable chest and leaned his face gently and comfortably. On the other hand, Jihoon leaned his back securely on the wall and rest as well. He thought Jeonghan was such a weird person because he’d rather prefer a hard pillow than a comfortable and soft one. Nevertheless, enough of complaining because he have all the time to enjoy screening his angel’s face up close, while resting.

 

         Some time later, Jihoon heard one of the members calling for the next user of the bathroom. Jihoon didn’t want to wake his sleeping angel yet, but he needed to, for him to rest quickly and comfortably after taking his shower.

 

         The little tame monster tapped Jeonghan’s soft cheeks lightly until he opened his eyes. The angel woke up with a smile and thanked Jihoon for lending him his body to sleep on.

 

When the sleeping beauty was about to stand, he d on Jihoon’s fluffy face and made him look closely at him.

 

Jeonghan:

Thank you, Hoonie~

(He didn’t intend to seduce Jihoon with his y sleepy smile and eyes.)

 

         Jihoon became shy and shoved his head far from Jeonghan’s seductive stares. His cheeks blushed.

 

Jihoon:

You’re alw-

 

         But Jeonghan cut his words by pulling Jihoon’s small face near him forcibly and pecked his soft lips gently.

 

         Jihoon was totally mesmerized. On the other hand, Jeonghan was showing his confidently teasing face.

 

Jeonghan:

You’re welcome.

(He smiled charmingly and ily.)

 

         Jihoon froze like a statue for a moment. While Jeonghan started teasing him more by pinching his cheeks to wake Jihoon up from his dream –which was real that time because the kissing was true.

 

Jeonghan:

Hoonie~

Did your FBI outsmarted you this time?

 

Jihoon:

(He was blushing as red as a tomato.)

Y-you-

(He was a little embarrassed, and he didn’t know how to react.)

 

Jeonghan:

What?

(He teased more)

I win this time.

Thank you Hoonie for being such a comfortable pillow.

(He giggled sweetly)

I’ll take my shower first.

 

         Jeonghan left Jihoon, who was still blushing, on Seungcheol’s bed while pursing his lips. He was stunned at first but found it interesting afterwards.

 

He had the same reaction as Cheol. Hoonie never thought, Jeonghan would answer back. The little monster considered it as one of the biggest blessing he ever had.

 

The genius composer was left smiling on one side of the bed. He was overly delighted with the gift he had received that moment.

 

Suddenly, he was inspired. The boy immediately got back to his bed and grabbed his notebook and pen and started writing some lyrics, so that later on, it would become a complete new song.

 

 

         One moment, Seungkwan and Jeonghan met at the hallway. Seungkwan was obviously acting weird and awkward in front of Jeonghan that day. The older wondered why. He called Seungkwan and asked him about his problem, but he said that he’s just reflecting on something and asked to ignore him.

 

         Like the others, Jeonghan let him be.

 

         Meanwhile, upon returning to his bed after taking a nice and warm shower, he noticed that his bed sheet changed. Immediately. He asked Mingyu, who was usually in charge of cleaning their room, if he was the one who changed his sheets. Mingyu pointed Seungkwan out, and Jeonghan became wary. He became troubled and assumed that Seungkwan could have read his diary; though, there was a part of him saying that it was impossible since Seungkwan didn’t have to lift the whole mattress just to change the cover. He was sure that he put his things at the center, so if someone would clean their room, no one would ever see it.

 

 

Jeonghan:

Mingyu ya?

Have you noticed Seungkwan acting weird lately?

 

Mingyu:

(Busy rearranging the cards on his wallet)

He’s always weird Jeonghanie~ why?

 

Jeonghan:

I saw him being awkward at me.

 

Mingyu:

Ah you mean, he’s being sad and quiet?

Don’t think too much hyung, Minghao said that he watched some sad short film after eating and that made him cry.

(He giggled)

Silly but cute.

He’s been acting like that after lunch.

 

Jeonghan:

Ah- I see.

(He smiled)

Anyway…

Good night, prince.

 

Mingyu:

Good night princess.

Saranghae~

 

Jeonghan:

Saranghae~

 

         Coups entered the room and he happened to hear their good night greetings and gave his too.

 

Coups:

How about me, Guinevere?

Good night.

 

Jeonghan:

Good night, Lancelot.

Sweet dreams.

 

Coups:

You too.

(He smiled)

 

Jeonghan:

(Peaked at the little monster’s lair)

Where is Jihoonie?

 

Coups:

At his office.

He said he’s working on something.

 

Jeonghan:

He’s working again?

 

Coups:

Yeah.

He seemed energized. What happened to him?

I , but he never fight back. He didn’t have the intent to kill this time.

It bothers me though.

(He laughed)

 

Mingyu:

Really?!

(With his amazed eyes)

 

Jeonghan:

(He giggled)

Maybe something good happened.

Good night, ugly ducklings.

 

Mingyu:

Right!

Good night, beauty.

(He smiled)

 

Coups:

Good night, Hanie~ we’ll be a very beautiful swan someday. You will see.

 

Jeonghan:

Right!

 

         The next morning, same thing happened to Jeonghan. He went to the bathroom early in the morning to vomit. On the other hand, Seungkwan couldn’t just sleep because of what he read. It kept him up the whole night.

 

The boy went to the living room instead, making him busy of things hoping that he would fall asleep the soonest. He did a lot of things already. He even read a book, but it’s boring so he diverted his attention in playing games. However, he was not in a good mood to play a game, so he eventually stopped. He lay his body down on the couch looking at the ceiling. Then, he remembered something written on Jeonghan’s diary. It was the attack during the dawn. He hoped it won’t occur because it would truly hurt Jeonghan again, but if ever it occurred, at least he’s there for him.

 

He guarded the hallway, waiting for someone to come out of the room. Finally, the moment came when Seungkwan heard a door knob. Later on, he saw someone rushing to the bathroom.

 

The boy was alerted and stood up in panic. He just really hoped that he was not Jeonghan; however, after hearing someone vomiting, he confirmed that it was really his poor hyung.

 

He’s suffering again.

 

Not long after, Seungkwan heard the shower. Good thing, Jeonghan did not lock the door. Seungkwan immediately responded to his poor hyung who needed someone beside him at the moment.

 

The younger man witnessed Jeonghan sitting in front of the shower, tucking his body altogether and letting him soak under the sprinkle of a warm water to ease the extreme coldness he’s experiencing.

 

Without any hesitation, the boy quickly aided his hyung.

 

Upon entering the room, the water was obviously hotter than the normal as it produces thick steams. Besides, the humidity inside was heavy.

 

As he came close, he put himself inside the shower. He could feel the painful sting of a very warm water touching his skin; nevertheless, he ignored it and dived his body into the warm bath to embrace his hurt angel.

 

Jeonghan made no response. He’s keeping his head down. On the contrary, the younger one keeps on calling and talking to Jeonghan.

 

After a few while, a gush of blood was seen flowing on the floor to the drainage. Seungkwan knew how heavy Jeonghan’s bleeding was. He responded quickly and wasted no time.

 

         They both waited inside the shower room being soaked in a warm bath with their clothes still on. Sooner, Jeonghan became better. Seungkwan pulled his weak angel up and carried him gently to the nearest seat, which was inside the dining room.

        

 

Seungkwan:

Hyung, I’ll just get your towel.

Wait here.

 

Jeonghan:

Sorry.

(He said weakly with his shivering body because of the cold air autumn was bringing them.)

 

         Seungkwan immediately get his towel and some dry clothes for his hyung. He started wiping him carefully and changed him as fast as he could.

 

Seungkwan:

Aigoo, hyung… since when are you feeling like this?

You should have called any of us.

If you don’t want the other people to know about this, then at least share it to me.

 

Jeonghan:

Thank you.

(He smiled faintly and talked nothing more.)

 

         Jeonghan’s lips were becoming pale and purplish again. He looked so weak… as for Seungkwan, as soon as he finished his job to change Jeonghan’s clothing, he changed his too because he could feel the chills up until his spine.

 

         Jeonghan asked him to be carried back to the room, so he could rest his tired body on his bed.

 

He managed to climb up to his bed, while Seungkwan never remove his eyes on Jeonghan until he successfully ascended up to his bed.

Jeonghan:

Thank you, Seungkwanie~ rest now.

(He smiled weakly)

Good night.

 

Seungkwan:

Alright. Good night.

 

         Early morning, the boys woke up one by one. Some were lazy, some were very energetic. For the first time, Seungkwan stayed sleeping on his bed for the longest time. He usually wakes up earlier than the other boys, but this time, he’s still on bed. DK and Joshua noticed it. At first they did not mind him and thought that he was just having a good dream, but when they called him for breakfast, they realized that Boo’s skin was reddish. Somehow, he looked terribly ill.

 

Joshua touched his forehead and found out that he has a high fever. Probably for getting his body wet in the middle of cold air at dawn, but no one knows about it except Jeonghan.

 

         DK called Seungcheol immediately.

 

Seungcheol:

What happened?

 

Joshua:

Cheol, Seungkwan has a very high fever… we need to bring him to the hospital.

 

         Seungcheol gave a quick check-up on how hot Seungkwan was. It surprised him that he was really suffering from a very high fever. He was worried that it may result to convulsion, so he took Joshua’s advice.

 

Joshua asked Mingyu to call their driver, so they could bring Seungkwan to the doctor immediately.

 

         On the other hand, while the others were busy with their sick Diva Boo, Wonwoo came by and visited their sleeping angel, since he didn’t see him around the living room. He assigned himself to wake their angel up.

 

They had no schedule that day, so it was okay not to forcefully wake their members up, but Jeonghan needed to eat first, so he could take his medicine. After that, he’s free to move back to sleep. Because delaying his time of his medicine intake is not good for his health.

 

         As he entered their room, Jeonghan was already on his way down off his bed. Jeonghan woke up because of the fuss and loud voices and steps coming from the other room. It worried him, so no matter how weak he felt, he forced himself to get up. It’s just that he had to be careful, so he won’t slip down. He held the metal bars tight, and he carefully took a step slowly down his bed.

 

Wonwoo:

Careful.

 

         The Wolf went behind him to assist him. Wonwoo secured Jeonghan’s body. Upon nearing the ground, Jeonghan felt his knees weak, and so he fell.

 

Wonwoo caught him. Unfortunately, the younger one couldn’t hold his stance firmly because of the sudden occurrence. Too bad, it got them slammed their bodies on the ground.

 

Jeonghan was safe. Thanks to Wonwoo. However, Wonwoo was hurt badly. Good thing that nothing severe accident happened. It’s just that Wonwoo’s really hurts.  

 

         Their fall created a loud sound which also called the others attention. It added tension to the boys, who were busy with their sick Boo, because they heard it from Jeonghan’s room.

 

         Meanwhile, Wonwoo assisted Jeonghan immediately after he recovered from his fall. He pulled him up gently. Upon touching his angel’s soft and delicate skin, it was noticeable that he’s warmer than a usual temperature. That, he figured out that he has also a fever.

 

Wonwoo:

Hyung… you are sick!

 

         Jeonghan talked, but it was not to answer Wonwoo’s statement. He was speaking words that weren’t related at all. He was mumbling random things about practice, trainee years, and his family. He even became delusional, calling his parents like he turned back being a toddler.

 

 

Jeonghan:

Papa…

Papa…

I can’t see…

Please help me papa.

It hurts here.

(Clasping his chest)

Here papa… I can’t breathe.

(Pointed at his chest)

It hurts. It hurts, papa.

(He started crying)

Where is mama? I need to see mama.

Call mama, please.

 

It stunned Wonwoo, and it made him worry so much. Especially when his delusion was followed by blood flowing down from his nose.

 

Wonwoo shouted for help as if he was panicking.

 

Wonwoo:

Hyung! Hyung!

Everyone! Hoshi! Jun!...

(He was about to carry the poor beauty)

Mingyu! Anyone!

Call the ambulance right now!

 

         That sight gave Wonwoo a fright. He was totally scared and panicked because he felt that it was something different this time.

 

         The boys were alerted of Wonwoo’s shout. He almost called everybody as fast as anybody could.

 

Vernon:

What is it, this time?

 

         They couldn’t calm their hearts down, given the fact that Seungkwan was really suffering from a high fever. And now… they had to deal with another one. They really hoped that it’s not as bad as they could visualize.

 

-JEONGHAN’S ROOM-

 

         While Jeognhan was still acting strange.

 

Jeonghan:

Papa… I can’t breathe.

(He continued whining)

 

Wonwoo:

What’s wrong, hyung?

(He said worriedly)

 

         On the other hand, Wonwoo pulled a towel to wipe the blood from Jeonghan’s nose and tears from his cheeks.

 

Minghao came first to rescue, and he witnessed almost everything.

 

Jeonghan:

Where is mama?

I need her now.

(He was still crying and throwing tantrums despite his weak body.)

 

         With that, despite looking tamely at Wonwoo, Jeonghan could only see him as some hyung assisting him, assuming that he was still a child.

 

The8:

What happened?

(He looked to scared and started panicking just like Wonwoo)

 

Wonwoo:

He’s having a high fever too. I think he’s hallucinating.

Quick! Call the others. Tell them that we will bring hyung as well.

 

         Wonwoo carried him out of the room, while Minghao was shouting for anyone who could call his doctor.

 

Vernon responded quickly, while the others were waiting for their van at the living room to fetch them.

 

Upon hearing the loud call, the others became puzzled. They were dazed. They actually felt pressured. It was such a traumatic day for the boys again. Two of their members were terribly ill, and now, Jeonghan was having his hallucinations- according to Wonwoo. They believed that it was probably because of his fever.

 

Seungcheol:

What happened?

 

Wonwoo:

Jeonghan hyung is a bit delusional. I think his fever had gone high like Seungkwan’s.

 

Joshua:

(Followed Cheol after finishing his duty to Seungkwan)

What’s happening?

(He was dazed.)

 

Jun:

Vernon, did you call Jeonghan hyung’s doctor?

 

Vernon:

Yes, hyung.

 

Wonwoo:

Dino, get some ice.

DK, kindly get his jacket.

 

Jihoon:

Why is the bleeding not stopping?

 

Wonwoo:

I don’t know.

How’s Seungkwan?

 

Hoshi:

He’s in bad shape.

Aigoo…

(With his surprisingly big eyes)

What the hell is happening?

 

         As soon as their van came to fetch them, Cheol carried Seungkwan, while Jun carried Jeonghan. As usual, Cheol and Joshua were in charge of their two sick members, and they left the kids with Jun for the meantime.

 

Seungcheol:

We’ll keep you posted.

 

Jun:

Alright. We’ll be waiting.

 

Joshua:

You know what to do, Jun.

Wonwoo, help him, alright.

 

         Wonwoo nodded.

 

Wonwoo:

Take care.

 

Seungcheol:

If anyone of you feels sick right now, come with us.

 

Sebongs:

No. we’re fine.

 

Seungcheol:

Alright.

We’ll go now.