Numb
Every Day With Day6They wait for him to answer, feeling slightly apprehensive. The dried blood on his arms is not encouraging. In fact, they wonder if something serious had been lurking and that they have been blind to the signs.
“I’m… I’ve been feeling odd,” begins Dowoon tentatively, eyes on the floor while twiddling his fingers. “Like, anything I feel has a wall in between. I know I’m feeling anxious speaking to all of you, but at the same time it doesn’t feel like me.”
Though puzzled, it is evident that the Day6 members care for the drummer. Yeong jumps up to sit in the boy’s lap. He pats the Shiba Inu’s head before continuing.
“I don’t know when it started, or why,” he continues. “But it grew. I tried to do more to distract myself. Yet it didn’t help. I didn’t want to let you guys worry. And then today, I didn’t even feel my sickness. I couldn’t feel anything. I felt that my thoughts have gone away. My mind felt blank. And then there is blood running on my arms. I simply felt that nothing mattered.”
Unexpectedly, Jae gets up to give Dowoon a hug. Jae’s tears fall on the drummer’s face.
“Oy, oy,” mumbles the oldest. “Of course we’ll worry. I already do. But we care and there’s no need to hide these things, alright?”
“It’s okay if you don’t understand,” says Sungjin. “We’ll go through it together.”
Wonpil sits next to Dowoon, gently grabbing his free arm.
“I’ll give you all the hugs you need to feel the love,” grins the pianist, causing the drummer to smile. “No more wall for you, Do.”
“You know that I care,” says Brian. “We all do. I guess we’ll keep repeating ourselves until you start feeling again.”
“I’m grateful, I don’t need to feel it to know it,” says Dowoon slowly, eventually breaking into an odd laughter and catching a cough and finally, breaking into sorrowful sobs.
They cluster together and stay in such a way for a little while. No more words are needed.
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