Chapter 10

“Confusing (What chu doing) my heart, I’m lost right now (I wait), I’m in the same place (oh why), Waiting for you to hold my hand – I Wait”

“Can I borrow a pair of scissors and shaving blade?”

She simply stared at him

Why? Is he going to kill himself, she asked herself.

But instead of asking him of his intent, Momo complied as how a good host should.

“Hait, choto mate ne.”

She came back a short while later to hand him his requests.

“Thank you,” he said  softly.

They were at the balcony again.

The night when Young K decided to stay on in Hakuba.

He is a little quiet tonight, Momo thought. Troubled. Like the whole world was on his shoulders.

They stayed in silence, both staring out to balcony panes for a few minutes longer, before Young K bid her good night and took leave.

Momo heard him going to the wash room slightly after that.

Feeling uneasy, she followed him and stuck her ear to the wash room door.

Finding it suspiciously quiet, she called out to him softly, albeit urgently.

“Brian-san? Daijobuka? Are you ok?”

She was afraid to wake her sleeping parents who were just down the hallway.

Feeling nervous he was not answering her, she gathered all her strength and pushed hard against the door.

The lock was a little faulty, so it easily gave way upon her slight weight, resulting in Momo falling unceremoniously onto the floor.

Startling Young K, who was crouching in the bath tub behind the shower curtain.

He hurriedly got out to help her, “you ok, Momo-chan?”

“Hait, gomene,” she answered sheepishly. “I’m ok. Just very shy.”

He was dressed in nothing more than a pair of tight grey boxers.

Leaving nothing to the imagination of how fine his physique was.

“Embarassed you mean,” he grinned.

This girl will not cease to surprise him.

“Hait.”

Trying to belatedly save his modesty, Young K grabbed a towel and wrapped it around his lower body.

Still, for Momo, the damage was done.

She has seen his body before. Has even helped her mother washed him in his sleep.

But having him but comotosed on the mattress and having him living and breathing in front of her, were totally different scenarios.

“What were trying to do?” Young K grinned down at her.

“I thought you commit hara-kiri?”

“Kill myself?”

She nodded.

“No, god no,” Young K held his hands up helplessly. “Look, no cuts.”

He held his wrists for her to check.

She nodded, feeling stupid all of a sudden.

“I was however, trying to cut my hair,” he explained.

“Why? Such beautiful hair?”

By that time, Momo was already sitting crossed legged on the bathroom floor, with him half kneeling in front of her.

“It’ll grow back,” he said wistfully. “You wanna help me?”

Momo stared at him for the longest time.

Trying to figure out his intentions.

He has a beautiful mop of blond hair. Clearly professionally styled.

Why would he want to cut it?

“Please, help me?” His eyes and the tilt of his head was her undoing. “I tried to do it on my own, but I don’t think I’m doing it right.”

Young K pointed to the bath tub.

Momo also noticed a clump of hair already gone from his front part.

She sighed and got up from the floor.

She then quickly went to get a plastic floor covering as well as stool and arranged them in the middle of the small bathroom.

“Dozo,” she said politely, yet clearly upset with his decision.

Young K took his seat and left his fate solely to her warm hands.

Yet he felt strangely at ease.

Momo started to snip away silently yet efficiently.

Moving around him as she carried out her task.

His long locks falling gracefully to the floor.

“You seem to you know what you’re doing,” Young K looked up at her face as she stood ministring the front part of his head.

Freckles. She has freckles on her cheeks, he thought randomly. So cute.

“I cut Otosan’s hair,” she answered him simply. Not at all perturbed by his intense stare.

“Ok, finished,” Momo announced after some time.

He looked at himself in the hand mirror she handed him.

It was a neat cut, short at the back and sides yet slightly longish at the top.

Something like the haircut he used to sport during his band’s debut.

Not chic like his current preferred style yet leaving a sweet boyish charm to his face.

He sighed and picked up the battery operated razor she gave him eralier and handed it to Momo.

“Please shave them all off.”

“What? Why? Your lovely hair,” Momo looked like she was about to cry.

He took her hand and put the razor gently in them.

He did not know why, but the moment was kind of emotional.

It was like throwing a part of himself away.

And he knew Momo felt it too.

She’s smart, Young K thought. She knows something is up, and is curious about it. Yet she is not prodding for explanations.

“I can do this myself, but I’d prefer if you do it for me. Jeabal.”

He took her trembling hands to reassure her.

“It’ll grow back. It won’t change anything.”

It was as if, he was telling Momo and himself, that cutting away his hair and in a way his personality will not really change him.

“Are you a prisoner? Escapee?” Momo demannded.

Yet keeping her voice low to suit the night.

“Do you think I am?”

His hands were still holding hers.

“Not with this beautiful hair, no.”

He simply smiled at her.

She was like a kid, saying things that was at the top of her head, not really thinking how intimate it sounded.

“Are you hiding? From bad people?”

Again the trust was apparent. He could very well be that bad person hiding from the good ones, he thought.

“Something like that.”

“Ok.”

“Ok?”

“Yeah, ok.”

“So, I can hide here? I was going to ask your parents tomorrow if I can stay here longer.”

“As long you not hurt my family.”

“Do you think I would?”

“No.”

Her voice small but her confidence high.

“That’s why I’m allowed to stay?”

“Yes, but I watching you,” Momo suddenly put out a fierce look, wriggling her fore finger to his face.

“I’ll be watching you,” he automatically corrected her, smiling softly, grabbing her wriggling finger. “Somehow, I have a feeling that that’ll be a privilege. You watching me. Make sure you don’t go back on your words, you hear?”

She just kept silent, looking at him with conflicted eyes, pulling her hand out of his.

“Please,” Young K pleaded, nudging her.

Momo gave a short sigh and put down the razor. Instead, she picked up the scissors again, and started cut his hair even shorter.

Young K continued to look at her as she did so. Noticing the detailing of her pretty face.

The twitch of her nose as she concentrated and the creases between her eye brows as she frowned slightly.

Luckily for Momo, her mind was too preoccupied to notice his observations.

Nor did she pay attention to his semi state any longer.

In fact, she was kind of used to seeing him that way.

That was how she found him in the first place.

Which brought her to thinking.

Why was he doing this?

What was he hiding from?

Who would have left him half dead in the snow back then.

She did not want to think ill of him.

He seemed to nice.

Too nice for people to want to do him harm.

But what could explain his strange behaviour.

He could have gone home when her family offered to arrange for his transportation back to Tokyo.

Yet, he refused.

And now he even decided to stay longer here.

Momo finished with the scissors and exchanged it for the razor.

“Here we go,” she announced. “No turning back?”

“No turning back,” he repeated. “Thank you, Mo-chan.”

Momo looked at him in the eyes, clearly upset with what she was about to do.

Yet, as she looked into his clear brown eyes, she knew she has to follow her instincts.

And that was to help this young man.

No matter what his predicament was.

No matter what the cost.