“Well… ain’t this just peachy,” I muttered, slowly sliding down the door.  

Crouching on my knees, I blew the soft, brown strands of my hair that had escaped the makeshift bun I had tied. 

My eyes were slightly swollen and crusty from all the crying. Hyun Joong had dropped me off at the corner of the street where SHINee lived, and after much persuading on my part; he left me alone on the streets. 

But as expected, God was screwing me for all I was worth today… so of course the guys of SHINee weren’t even at home. 

It wasn’t like I even expected them to be. I, Seohyun Hamasaki, was a pathetic little girl who expected stars to be at my beck and call. 

Drip. 

. 

I looked up and my right eye flickered almost painfully as an ice cold droplet of rain penetrated it.Huddling as close to the door as I could with my entire luggage, my wallet caught my eye as it fell out of my jacket.I felt like a hobo; greedily snatching the purse up and rummaging through it, picking at whatever I could find.But alas, all I got was seventy cents. 

Seventy freaking cents. 

That wasn’t even enough to make a call home even whe- 

Home. 

Now then, wasn't that a word that struck too close for comfort? 

When had I last called my parents? I couldn’t even remember. My time had been spent with that stupid, pig of a husband of mine. 

A bitter, crazed little giggle burst its way through my lips. I had denied that this was going to work from the very start, hadn’t I? 

Now, it turned out, I was right. And the ironic thing about it? 

I was the one that was tossed to the side, like a used piece of tissue, waiting to be washed down the drain and slowly decomposed. 

My life was one great big, ing drama wasn’t it? I was simply a small pawn on the chessboard, and once Jae Joong had me out of the way, that Sohee just comes and replaces me like I was never there. 

My vision blurred again, and holding my heads in my hands, I slowly rocked back and forwards, wanting to fall asleep and get rid of the numbing cold around me more than anything else. 

I wanted to escape. 

- 

What was that? 

What was that annoying, high pitched sound of a kettle, coming from right behind me? 

My eyebrows furrowed. 

I was in someplace warm, something was balancing my entire body except my right arm; which was dangling dangerously far below me. 

“Hey…” That voice… Where had I- 

My eyes shot open, and my body sat bolt upright. The five people in front of me leaned backwards just as quickly as I did forwards; shocked by the sudden movement. 

For some reason – I was probably drugged --, I had a strange sense of déjà vu. The scene reminded me of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, where they find her in their beds. 

“You okay?” I looked around at Taemin. He waved and laughed. 

“Gave us quite a bit of a fright there you know, lucky Hyun Joong hyung called us.” Ah, well. Thank god for Hyun Joong. 

One of the people I recognised as Key got up from his seat and left for the kitchen, leaving me with four… too beautiful to be real men in my wake. 

“Hi. I’m Hamasaki Seohyun.” I lifted my left arm and reached it towards the closest person near me, Onew. 

He grinned and caught my hand, turning the palm upwards so he caught sight of my ring. 

He wolf whistled. “Quite a stunner you’ve got there Mrs. Kim Jae Joong.”  

For a complete, breathtakingly long moment, I was stumped for words. Onew, the man portrayed as a cutesy, good boy, had just thrown me a y, hot, mature compliment. 

But then I remembered what he had called me and my blood seemed to curdle, and the temperature in the room seemed to drop lower than an icy pole in Antarctica. 

My hand involuntarily slipped from his, and so did Onew’s smile. In place of the awkwardly silent atmosphere, Key came back, his hands carefully balancing a tray with six mugs on it. 

“I put your bags in the guest room, Seohyun-ah. I hope you don’t mind with the informal talk, Jonghyun and Taemin have already told me so much about you that I feel as if I’ve known you for a long time already.” 

Dear mother of god. 

I had never really liked Key too much; He had always seemed a bit y for my liking, but goddamn did that boy know how to use his words. 

I felt a tiny smile grow on my face, a clear indication that my heart was already his. 

“Hi. I’m Minho," a quietly deep voice announced. 

My eyes travelled over to the muscular rapper of the lot. A small, timid smile came up my face as I tried not to waver under his penetrating, almost cold, glare. 

Suddenly, Key placed the tray on the table loudly. Almost too loudly.  

“Here, drink up guys, I just made it.” I was the first one to grab my drink, and just as I pulled back, I realised I was shaking. 

Hoping that the others didn’t see, I bashfully raised my eyes just in time to catch Key shoot Minho a cold, warning look. The tallest diverted his attention, looking someplace else. 

“… how long have I been out?” By now, I should have been used to the dozens of embarrassing situations I had been put in with celebrities watching, but this was by far the worst. 

They had just seen the after math of a woman who lost her husband, and probably her mind. 

“Um... twenty minutes? We came home, like, right after Hyun Joong dropped you off apparently," Jonghyun answered. And just as quickly as he had replied, his phone buzzed in his pocket. 

He looked at the I.D on his screen and glanced at me, and seeing that I was staring at him, flashed me a smile and quickly scurried off to the kitchen. 

I swallowed uncomfortably, and almost choked on the dry, hard lump that formed in my throat.  

A warm hand was placed on my knee and I looked up to see Onew, giving me a shy but comforting smile. His face read ‘y, kind man who needs to get laid!’ and I blushed profusely. 

Key, Taemin and Minho watched my little ‘exchange’ with Onew and they smiled, except for Minho, who rolled his eyes in annoyance and left the room. 

“Sorry about Minho hyung, he feels very strongly about girls being in the dorm.” Taemin gave me his eye smile, and I nodded immediately, entranced by his pearly whites. 

Jonghyun shuffled back in, and sheepishly handed me his phone. “For you…” he said, and without even thinking, I answered.” 

“Hello?” my voice quivered from the sleep. 

“…Seohyun? Seohyun is that you? Sweet Jesus I-“ My heart froze, before stumbling and then picking the pace back up. 

As much as I liked him, hearing Jae Joong’s voice right now made me really want to puke, or because I hadn’t eaten in hours, gag on air. 

“Hi, I’m a little busy right now so I’ll call you later.” I sounded like an answering machine: monotonous and whiny. 

“W-What? Your phone is dead and Hyun-“ 

“Sorry? I think the line is breaking up.” Lamest trick in the book I know, but by now I was desperate. 

“Hamasaki Seohyun, don’t you dare do this to-“ 

Click. 

Handing the phone back to Jonghyun, I met eyes with Key, and at once he led me up the stairs to my room. 

“Stupid, stupid Seohyun. What are you thinking?” I muttered to myself as I ran up the stairs.  

Hot tears threatened to spill over my cheeks as I replayed the conversation over and over in my head. When I actually got to the room, they were too hard to hold in. I hurried inside, crouched down on my knees, and started to sob. It was too hard. Everything in this goddamn world was too ing hard to handle. My heart hurt, my head hurt, my soul hurt. I just wanted to sleep forever. I stayed there for about twenty seconds before a hand was placed on my head, ruffling my hair a bit. I looked up and into Key’s eyes before hurriedly standing up again. 

Forgot he came into the room too. 

I wiped my eyes as quickly as I could and swore when I saw the dark grey marks my mascara made on my hands. The older man handed me a cotton napkin and I gratefully wiped my eyes. 

He stared at me, a look of brotherly adoration in his eyes. In two steps, he crossed the room and took me in his arms, cradling me against his head.  

“Cry it out.” 

Those three words sent me over the edge. A crazed sob burst out of my mouth and I pressed a fist against my lips to make sure the sound wasn’t too loud. Key shushed me as loud as he dared, and we spent the next ten minutes just holding onto each other, trying to suppress my feelings. 

“Go take a shower. I’ll be back with dinner.” My nose and lips were numb with the cold, and nodding gratefully, I grabbed some clothes and hurried into the bathroom. 

I was never a pretty crier. My nose and eyebrows went red and snotty, and hiccups dominated my chest, creating circumstances where I tried to talk and ended up wanting to laugh at myself out of sheer embarrassment.The cool water soothed me.It helped me sort out my unruly hair as well as my thoughts, and it let me really gain a new perspective on my marriage so far, and as I massaged shampoo into my hair, I made a list of pro’s and con’s. Okay, so at the start, I was the reluctant one. Actually, I was the only visibly reluctant one. Jae Joong was probably unwilling to marry a little girl too but decided to make it work. 

Con for me… pro for him. 

After we got married… I guess I didn’t take married life too well, with me not knowing how to cook. 

Con. Definite con. 

“But Jae Joong took me out to have dinner a lot, and he was nice and patient to me. In the end I still did warm up to him… sort of.” The foggy glass of the mirror was the perfect visual analogy for my brain right now. 

Well, he did tell me about his past. And he liked me so much that… so much that... 

“He said he loved me.”  

I groaned and tapped my head on the glass. “Why, why, why must you be so stupid!” I chuckled softly, realizing that was kind of my motto now, with everything that I had done. 

Did I love him? 

“Of course… not.”   

Sohee and Yoochun managed to ruin things very nicely for me… and I think I would’ve told him that I loved him if they hadn’t interrupted. My breath grew faster and shorter in anger at the memory. 

"Do you love me?" he whispered. He reached out one long finger and traced the outline of my lips.  

Did I love him? Did I love the way he held me, the way he caressed me and held me like I was something easily broken? Did I love the way he randomly kissed me? Did I love how I was the one person who could make him open up in the span of four months? Yes, it had been four months since I had gotten married to Jaejoong. The most insane, awkward, confusing four months of my life, yes.  

But they were also the four months that I had realized that I was truly blessed to be married to such an amazing person.  

We had spent late nights staying up and laughing together. Spent hours talking and watching movies. Spent days, weeks, months together. I had accepted Jaejoong as an unforgettable part of my life. I knew he was more like an almost boyfriend than a husband.  

But I still cared about him.  

I still wanted him more than I possibly should have.  

My answer was crucial. It could either make or break our relationship. And as I looked into Jaejoong's beautiful eyes, the answer slowly formed in my mind.  

"I... I think t-that---" I began tearfully when I was suddenly cut off. 

“Jesus bloody-“ 

“Seohyun-sshi? You’ve been in there for over forty minutes now. Are you alright?” Key’s soft voice interrupted my little rant. 

“Y-yep. Almost done.” I hurriedly wiped myself down and slipped on a pair of navy blue jeans and a soft turtleneck. 

Looking at my haggard expression, I decided that something had to be done. Even if Jae Joong left me, and even if we decided on a mutual divorce, I would not allow myself to be dragged into the depths of depression by some y idiot. 

I opened my door and walked straight to my duffle bag, rummaging through all my clothes and sanitary items for the small object that was to decide my fate. 

Pressing the number 1 on speed dial, I held the small phone to my ear. 

Three dials rang and my heart shuddered along with them. I hadn’t spoken to this person in months, probably not since the wedding day. I had grown up with her, and we knew each other inside out. 

“Hello?” 

It was time to confide in Hyoseon. 

My sister. 

- 

InToXi: 

Hellloooo people!! 

LOL I bet half of you were going… 

Wait. Who’s Hyoseon? *click back to forwards* 

Ahhh. 

I’ve missed you guys… we’ve missed you guys! 

It’s been over a month yes? Probably almost two months. 

Hopefully your anger will subside as you read this chapter and the next few chapters after this! 

Seohyun’s marriage is finally starting to tear at the seams… 

And unlike before, she’s wondering why she’s upset at such a small thing that at first… she never wanted. 

But now? 

Hey. 

I’ll tell you a secret. 

Her knight in shining armor is coming front and centre… 

He’s y, manly and has a hip  and voice that’s sooo worthy.. 

He’s… 

Oh! Naw, we have to go now! :P 

See you guys next time! 

*walks away cackling* I’m so evil!~ 

Nightingale:  

Hi guys.  

Just so you know, I ing . I really truly do. And I understand if you want to unsubscribe and never see any of our usernames on AFF ever again, I totally do.  

but please don't 

Okay, so, Hyoseon is Seohyun's older sister and they are separated by three years, making Hyoseon 20.  

Everything's getting more and more complicated lol. SHINee will be in this a lot more now, and there will definitely be increased scandals, a little y time and some accidents.  

Enjoy, lovelies!