N went back to his and Ravi’s room. At that time, Ravi was awake.

“N-hyung, are you ok?” asked Ravi while sitting on the bed

“I’m ok, why?” asked N confusedly

“where were you?”

“I was thirsty, so I went to the fridge to get a glass of water.”

“why it took you so long?”

“well, it was just because I met Leo.”

“did you talk something to him?”

“yeah.”

“then how did it go? You made up?” asked Ravi curiously

“why do you want to know?” N started to feel annoyed .

“no, I just don’t want to see you like this. You’ve changed a lot since the day Hyuk was hospitalized.” Said Ravi

“well, I know. I’m a bad leader.” Said N

“hyung, I don’t mean it. What are you talking about?”

“what do you mean then?”

“You’ve changed. Now, you are not that loud anymore. You lost your smile, and sometimes you look sick and maybe lifeless.”

“then what do you want me to do?” asked N.

“hyung, why are you so cold? I just don’t want you to be like this. I want your old-self. You used to smile at everything. You used to be so loud, and you have never been so cold like this.”

N just looked at Ravi expressionless. He didn’t give him any response at all.

“hyung, stop it. I’m worried about you.”

“that makes no sense.” Said N

“hyung, what do you mean? Hyung, stop confusing me. I don’t get it.”

“just stop pretending like you care.”

“hyung, what do you mean by pretending? I’m not pretending. I really care about you. What makes you think so?”

“just go back to sleep.”

“no, I won’t sleep until you give me an explanation about it.”

“it’s still early morning. I want to sleep again.”

“hyung, please...I have to know.”

“Ravi-ya, stop it. I’m tired.” Said N. His tears were about to fall, but he held it.

“hyung, why? I’m just asking for your explanation.”

“well, Everyone says that I’m a bad leader, and I don’t deserve to be a leader. I want to change my position, but I have no chance to tell Jongwan-hyung cause everytime I meet him, he always ignores me. Not only Jongwan-hyung who ignores me, but everyone is starting to ignore me as well.”

“you’re not a bad leader. Who says such a thing? And why Jongwan-hyung ignores you?”

“everyone says it. I don’t know, but Jongwan-hyung has changed since he scolded me when Hyuk was hospitalized.”

“everyone? I never say it. Why did Jongwan-hyung scold you?”

“even though you and some people don’t say it, I know what’s in their minds. He scolded me because I wasn’t doing well like a real leader. Well, I told you everything. Are you satisfied?”

“hyung! How could you conclude something like that?”

“shut up Ravi-ya. I don’t want to argue with you.”

“hyung, we’re not arguing, and we won’t.  I still don’t get it.”

“then never mind.” Said N calmly

“hyung!”

“aren’t you going to shut up?” N raised his tone, and finally Ravi shut up.

Then, N went to his bed to sleep. While Ravi, he thought about what did N say to him.

                                                                                                ----------

At night, after their schedules had ended, they went back to the dorm. They haven’t had their dinner. So, Leo decided to cook ramen for them and Hyuk helped Leo.

When they were cooking together, Hyuk asked something to Leo.

“Leo-hyung, is Ken hyung ok?”

“yes, he is ok. Why?”

“no problem. And how about your problem with N-hyung?”

“I apologized to him, but I don’t know I made it up or not.”

“hmm, do you think N-hyung is okay?”

“I’m not sure. Why?” asked Leo

“well, I think the members already know that N-hyung is different now.”

At that time, N passed by and he heard their conversation. Then, he interrupted them.

“what are you two talking about? Don’t talk behind me.” Said N

Leo and Hyuk were shocked for N’s presence all of a sudden.

“why are you so shocked? Well, I think you were talking something bad behind me. Am I right?”

“no hyung. I’m just worried about you. I want to know how’s your condition, but I’m afraid to ask you, so I want to ask Leo-hyung about it.” Said Hyuk

“worry about me? All of you just have the same reason that is really ridiculous.” Said N

“ridiculous? What do you mean? I’m really worried about you. Hongbin-hyung too.” Said Hyuk

“whatever you want” said N as he left

“hyung, don’t misunderstand. We’re not talking bad about you.” Said Leo

“argh! I’m so frustrated.” Said Hyuk

“don’t think much about it. Let’s  just serve these ramen noodles.”

                                                                                                ---------

“dinner is ready. Come here please......” shouted Hyuk from the dinning room

Then all the members came, except for N.

“wow, it smells nice.” Said Hongbin

“of course, I cooked it.” Said Hyuk

“with Leo-hyung.” Added Ravi

“hahaha, yeah.”

“uh, I’m so hungry.” Said Ken

“then eat it.” Said Leo

“by the way, where is N-hyung?” asked Ken

“yeah, I was just about to ask it too. Where is he?” added Hongbin

“Maybe in his room. I’ll check it.” Said Ravi

Then, Ravi went to his and N’s room. He opened the door without knocking it. Ravi was really surprised when he saw N crying on the bed.

“hyung, are you ok?” asked Ravi

N was also surprised. He didn’t realize Ravi’s presence. Then, he immediately wiped his tears

“hey! Why are you here? You should have knocked the door first!” said N

“hyung, why are you crying?” Ravi ignored N’s question.

“no, I’m not crying.” N lied

“hyung, I saw it. You were crying.” Said Ravi and came closer to N

“it has nothing to do with you.” Said N

“hyung! Are you really my hyung? Am I your family? Or don’t you trust me like I do to you?” said Ravi

“you’re not my real family.” Said N

“hyung, I know it, but we’re still family. The other members are also your family as well. So, why don’t you trust me or trust us?”

“what trust? You don’t even trust me.”

“who said that? The other members and I trust you. So, you should trust us too. Now, tell me what makes you cry. I have to know it, hyung because we’re family.” Said Ravi

“I’m sorry. I’m really sorry.” Said N, then he cried again.

“what happened hyung? Why are you sorry?” asked Ravi

“I need to talk to Ken.”

To be continued..........