Tonight, I lay my head on her lap, without any worries to be scared of. Tonight, I only see her.

Tonight when my heart is falling like autumn leaves and soon to be missed, but while the time of it dwindling, the wind accompanied me. She is like the wind in chilly fall afternoon. She is the one who justified the season.

“You know, you should talk.” Shinhye said while playing my hair. “We should talk.” She smiled.

“I have so much to talk about, but I think I just want to stare at you all night.” I touched her face.

“You always look at me this way.” She replied.

“No, I love looking at you this way since you remembered me. I can see that through your eyes.” I smiled even my tone does not agree with it.

“Do I scare you when we are like strangers?” She honestly asked.

“At first, yes. But the need of being adopt saved me.” I said. At this moment, I feel more comfortable in this conversation. It is like we are now accepting the reality, with no doubt or rage. It is like we have passed the stage about accepting and redirecting hope. “If you could just imagine how I felt that day. It felt awful.”

She laughed a bit. “More like terrible than losing a game with one point. But I am not sorry anymore. I should stop saying it.”

I agree with her. In the first place it is not her fault; it is nobody’s fault either. We cannot do blame game on this matter because everybody knew that all will be hurt in the end. “Sometimes apologizing just screw things.”

“For us, that’s an absolute answer. Because every time we say sorry we are going back to page one and be hopeful again.” She looked at me. “But I am not saying being apologetic is a bad thing, it is just awkward.”

I kissed her. I just did. “We cannot say sorry anymore but I will always love you. And I love you so much Shinhye.”

“You know I love you too, and I would always go back to you in the end.” She calmly replied. “I maybe do detours once in a while but I assure you, I will always come back.”

Just like this night.

Just like this moment. She came back.

“I can always wait.” I smiled. “I am not going anywhere without you.”

“You should be.” She said in a wifely manner.

“Then I should refrain from hanging out with Minhyuk. You knew what he is capable of.” I giggled. “I think I sh