How Am I Supposed To Live Without You

Friendship or Love?

DONGHAE’S POV

“I NEVER THOUGHT THAT I GAVE HER UP TO A STUPID, CHEATER GUY LIKE YOU! AND BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU DID, I’M NOT GOING TO HOLD BACK ANYMORE!” I shouted at him.

“MWORAGO?!” he asked, maybe confused as he punched me again. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! YOU’RE GOING TO STEAL HER AWAY FROM ME?!"

"STEAL HER AWAY FROM YOU? NO I’M NOT GOING TO DO THAT." I yelled back.

"THEN WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!!!!!" he asked as a smirked immediately formed in my lips. 

"DO YOU REALLY NEED TO ASK ME THAT?! WHY DON’T YOU ASK YOURSELF, PUNK!"

"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!"

"PUNK, DIDN’T YOU HEAR?!" I said, as his fist landed on my face again. I punched him back, with a voice suddenly yelling, making us stop. 

 

“Oppa! What are you doing?!” I looked at the voice and saw Jae Kyung, making me even more furious. 

“Look at what we have here, your savior!” I said with sarcasm and finally walked out, leaving the both of them. 

“Ya Lee Donghae we’re not yet done!” I heard him yell.

“Oppa, are you okay? What happened?!” I heard Jae Kyung asked and at the same time, I felt someone hold unto my wrist, stopping me from my tracks. 

“Where is she?!” It was Kyuhyun. 

“And who are you to ask that question to me?!” I answered him back.

“She’s my ing girlfriend so tell me where the hell is she!” he said.

“Why don’t you find her yourself?!” 

“She’s in your house, right?!” he asked. How did he know?

“I’m not going to tell you.” I said.

“So she is.” He said before walking ahead of me. Ayssi I better warn _____.

 

 

 

Even though Kyuhyun left earlier than I did, just for the fact that he doesn't have a key, so he waited for me outside. I entered my house first, with him immediately rushing behind me. 

“Hey where are your manners?!” I shouted at him.

“Where is she?!” he asked, not answering my comment. Oh crap. I immediately ran upstairs, with him following me at the back. 

I looked for _____ in my room and around the house, but she's not here. Where is she?! 

The thought of her going out and buying dinner calmed me down.

 

“Where did you hide her?!” he asked. 

“I told you she’s not here!”  I told him.

“I don’t believe you! I saw this note!” he said before handing me a note.

 

‘Donghae!!! Thank you so much for keeping me for the past few days… I really appreciate it! You’re a really nice friend! I love you! >\/< Anyway, don’t worry about me now… I’ll be fine… P.S I cooked dinner for you, it’s already at the table. Hope you enjoy it! <3’                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                

What the hell?! Where did she go?!! Ayssi.

I immediately went out and opened the driver's seat, with Kyuhyun sitting on the passenger's. 

“Drive!” he commanded demandingly. 

“Am I your driver?!” I asked him, getting irritated of how he treats me. 

“Please drive.” He finally said in a lower voice.

“And why will I drive for you?!”

“Because we need to find _____!” he said, waking me up from my sense and started driving. 

 

“Where are we going?” I asked him.

“Well… I don’t really know.”

“Ayssi. Just tell me the places you usually go!”

 

 

~

We pretty much toured the whole Seoul, looking for _____. But there’s not even a single sign where she is. Ayssi. Where could she be?

“Why don’t you call her?” I asked Kyuhyun.

“I already did that, but she’s not answering” he said making me sigh in frustration. Where is she?!

 

 

 

 

-----the next day-----

MY POV                                                                                                                                                                       

Today, I promised myself that I'll go to school since I’ve been missing a lot of lessons already.

I guess I'm too early since I'm the only one here in the classroom. And so I've decided to just sleep first since I haven't been sleeping this past few days because of that stupid guy. 

Ayssi. _____ you should stop thinking about him, remember?! 

 

 

I'm making my way back home when I saw Kyuhyun kissing Jae Kyung.

"Kyu-Kyuhyun-ah..." I uttered softly as I felt hot tears immediately flowing out of my eyes. 

"Oh eonnie! Good thing you're here! Oppa, now tell her what you've been wanting to say!" Jae Kyung smiled, hugging him on the sides.

"First, I want to thank you because you introduced Jae Kyunggie to me. Second, I'm breaking up with you. I'm sorry _____, but I love Jae Kyung and I can't be with you anymore." 

"Damn you Kyuhyun! I trusted you!" I told him, but then he just smirked.

 

 

My eyes flung open, seeing an empty classroom ahead of me. 

I sniffed as I finally noticed that I am literally crying. Damn. I already promised myself not to think about him, but guess what, I even dreamed of him! 

I guess coming to school is a bad idea after all. 

I stood up, getting my bag when I heard someone called me. 

“_____-ah!”the voice called and the moment I turned around, I was being trapped in a familiar body's arm. “Where have you been? I’m so worried sick about you!” he said as I just wrap my arms around him. 

“Didn’t I leave a note?” I told him.

“But still, you should have warned me or something!” he insisted.

“That’s the purpose of the note!” I argued and pulled back from the hug. “See? I’m totally okay!” I told him, chuckling a little. 

“No you’re not.” he said, cupping my face. “You cried… again.” He continued as my vision started to get blurry, tears falling endlessly. I immediately wiped it with my hands, giving him a small smile. 

“I’ll be okay soon.” I said, wrapping my arms around him and resting my head on his chest. “Thanks for worrying… You’re like a mom.” I said, chuckling a little. He then pulled back, cupping my face. 

“I’ll always be here for you, remember that." He said, leaning in before giving me a soft kiss on my left cheek. 

“Thanks.” I said, smiling at him. But before I knew it, someone separated us two, punching Donghae right in the face.  

The impact was really hard, therefore throwing Donghae on the ground.

 

"Ya!" I screamed at the scene as I saw Kyuhyun glaring at Donghae, who's lying on the floor. 

“How dare you steal my girlfriend away from me!” he yelled, but instead of replying, Donghae stood up and punched Kyuhyun back. Kyuhyun was then about to punch him again but I stopped them.

“Stop! Donghae, Kyuhyun please stop!”  I glared at the both of them before making my way to Donghae. “Hey are you okay?” I asked him as I wipe the blood stains off his lips.

“I’m not stealing her away from you!” Donghae yelled, glaring at Kyuhyun. 

“Then what the hell are you doing?!”

“Stop! I said stop!” I screamed.

“So now you’re taking side, huh?!” Kyuhyun said, obviously talking to me and so I glare at him. 

“Donghae, please leave us for a moment, I need to talk to him.” I said calmly.

“But—“ I cut him off.

“Please? Everything will be fine.” I told him, forcing a smile. He finally he nodded in defeat, leaving us alone.

 

“WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?!” he shouted at me.

“EXCUSE ME??!!” I shouted back.

“Are you dating THAT GUY behind my back?!!”

“WHAT?!!”

“I said, are you DATING THAT GUY behind my back?!!!” he asked as I just felt myself smirking. 

“THAT GUY?!! DON’T YOU DARE TALK ABOUT DONGHAE LIKE THAT!!” I said.

“You're really taking his side huh?!”

“And what do you ing care about?!” I said, and I can see how shocked his expression is. 

 

“_____-ah, is there something wrong? Are you mad at me?” he asked me, voice toning down a little. I just stared at the ground as tears started to form in my eyes again. I then tried my best to hold it back, turning up and meeting his gaze. 

“Okay… Let me just get this straight.” I said with my voice started to shake. “You don’t care if I’m dating Donghae or not.”

“Don’t care? But I’m your boy—“

“I’m breaking up with you.” I said, cutting him off. 

“Mwo-mwo?!” he stuttered as I turned my gaze back on the floor, still trying to hold back my tears.

“I, _____, is breaking up with you, Cho Kyuhyun.” I said, now meeting his gaze. 

“Wh-why?” he asked. “Don’t you love me anymore?” he asked as his eyes were tearing up a little. 

“Maybe I should ask you that… Do you still love me?” I asked him, but afraid of hearing the answer straight from his lips, I've decided to pretend to be strong and just smirk at him. "What am I thinking?! I shouldn’t have asked that stupid question.” I said, turning around and planning to walk away but he caught me into his arms, wrapping them tightly around my waist. “What are you doing?! Let me go!” I shouted, trying to pull myself back but he won't budge.

“Please tell me what’s wrong… I promise to fix it. Please don’t leave me, don’t break up with me.” He said with a shaking voice as I felt something dripping on my shirt.

I tried pulling myself back once again, but he just hugged me tighter, almost suffocating me.

"Please tell me what’s wrong… I don’t know how to live my life without you. I think I’ll be insane. _____-ah, I love you.” he said as I felt myself freezing in my position, with my heart as the only one beating really, really fast. I don't know if I should be happy about what he just said.

I finally turned around to face him, his eyes are red as he kept on silently crying. He then wrapped his arms around my shoulder, resting his head on it.

“I love you… Please take back what you’ve said.”

“Really? You love me?” I asked him sarcastically as he pulled back from the hug and stared at me with his red eyes.

“Yes, I love you so much.” he said before his lips quickly met mine, kissing it rather harshly. I tried pulling myself back, but he immediately placed his hand on my nape, bringing us closer.

I just found myself kissing him back, with him now kissing me softly. I know I've been wanting his lips on mine... And how I missed how him so much.

I love him but I know that he's now dating my cousin and so I used all of my strength to push him off me. 

“I’m sorry, but we’re done.” I told him before walking away.

 

 

 

KYUHYUN’S POV

“I’m sorry, but we’re done.” She said before turning away and started to walk away.

“_____-ah!” I called her as she stopped from her tracks. 

“She’s a really nice girl. I love her so much… So don’t you dare hurt her. ‘Cause if you do, I won’t ever forgive you.” She said before finally leaving me alone.

 

What is she talking about? Did I do something wrong? Why would she break up with me without a valid reason?

I know that she still loves me because she kissed me back just a moment ago… And I can just feel the fact that she does love me. But then why would she break up with me?! 

I keep on thinking different reasons why would she break up with me. When suddenly I remembered what she said before she finally leaves me- ‘She’s a really nice girl. I love her so much so don’t you dare hurt her. ‘Cause if you do, I won’t ever forgive you.’

Who the hell is she talking about?!

Wa-wait, sh-she saw us??!

 

 

~

It's dismissal time and I was about to look and explain to her what really happened when the who broke us apart is here. 

“Oppa!” she called, clinging into my arms. I quickly shook her arm off before glaring at her. “Oppa, is there something wrong? Did something happen in school?”

“YES! SOMETHING DID HAPPEN!” I unexpectedly yelled at her, making her step back a little. 

“Oppa, did I do something wrong? Are you mad at me?” she asked as her eyes are already on the verge of tears. 

“_____ and I broke up because of you!!”

“Oppa I don’t understand… Eonnie is your girlfriend?” she asked me. Is she playing stupid or what?! “Yes, she was. But now she’s not anymore, why?! It’s all because of you!!” 

“But oppa, I didn’t know… I’m sorry.” She said as tears finally flow out of her eyes. 

“You’re sorry?! How can you even say that when you did it on purpose! Because of you, I don’t know if I will still be able to be with the love of my life!”

“Oppa I’m sorry.”

“I won’t accept your damn sorry unless _____ and I are back together. So for now, get lost!” I said, walking away and leaving her. 

 

 

 

JAE KYUNG’S POV

Kyuhyun oppa and eonnie were dating?! Ayssi Kim Jae Kyung what have you done?!! I swear to God if I knew they were in a relationship, I won’t bother Kyuhyun oppa anymore! Ayssi. It’s all my fault.

I don’t know how much they love each other, but I can sense that eonnie loves Kyuhyun oppa more than I do. I mean… I only have a crush on oppa, and you know that crushes can sometimes lead to relationships, but then I never intended to ruin their relationship, especially eonnie’s!! I will not be able to forgive myself if I know that eonnie’s hurt. I love her so much… She took care of me the moment I took a step in Seoul… And even before when we were much younger. But now what have I done?!! I already flirted with his boyfriend, and even broke them up! I’m so stupid!! I should explain everything to eonnie!

I went home to look for her, but she’s still not home… Eottokhe?! I went out to look for the places that we’ve been going the past few weeks. But she’s  also not there.

I tried looking out for her carefully, trying not to miss anyone’s faces because I might not see her, but it’s no use. I also tried calling her, but she’s not picking up! Sighs.

I looked at my watch and saw that it’s already 10PM and so I've decided to just continue looking for her tomorrow.

 

The next day, I woke up early to look for her. It took me the whole morning until afternoon to look for her, but still, no sign of eonnie. And so I've decided to just go home to take a rest first.

When I got home, I immediately laid on the sofa, closing my eyes. But then a few seconds later, I heard the door unlocked as my eyes quickly flew open. I looked around but found no one, and so I just shut it once again. I must be tired.

As I close my eyes, I heard footsteps that made me open my eyes as my heart started to race. I stood up, looking for the footsteps when I saw Eonnie coming out from the kitchen. 

“EONNIE!”I screamed in excitement, hugging her. 

“Ya! Do you need to scream?!” she said, but nevertheless hugging me back. 

“Eonnie…” I called her once again, but this time my voice is starting to shake. 

“Yes?”

“Eonnie…” I called as tears started to fall out of my eyes.

“Why? Ya, why are you crying??” 

“Kyuhyun oppa…”

“Kyuhyun?! Why?!! Did he do something stupid to you?!” she said, voice raising a little.

“Eonnie, mianhe… I didn’t know.”

“Mwo?! Ya Kim Jae Kyung tell me what the hell did he do to you!” she said, pulling back to look at me. 

“Eonnie, I’m sorry… I didn’t know that you were dating, I’m really sorry.” I apologized but she didn't reply. “Eonnie, please forgive me… I swear that if I only knew, I won’t flirt with him! I don’t want to hurt you, and I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“Stop it.” she said in a stern voice. 

“Huh?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” she said and started walking away, but suddenly stopped in her tracks. “Have you eaten dinner?” she said out flatly. 

“Eonnie you need to listen!”

“I am asking you if you have eaten dinner because I’m cooking!”

“Eonnie, Kyuhyun oppa loves you so much so please listen to me!”

“So now you’re lying for him, huh?!”

“No! Eonnie, if you will just listen, I’ll explain to you what really happened!” I told her as she finally turned around to face me. 

“Go on." she nodded.

“Okay, so this is what happened…”

 

 

#FLASHBACK#

NO ONE’S POV

“Aww… Oppa just look at them!” Jae Kyung said as she pointed at _____ and Donghae, who were hugging each other.

“What about them?!”Kyuhyun rolled his eyes as Jae Kyung just giggled in return

“They look so cute together, don’t you think they are dating?”Jae Kyung asked.

“No they’re not!” Kyuhyun replied with an annoyed voice, earning a suspicion from Jae Kyung. 

“Oppa wae? Are you jealous?” Jae Kyung asked but instead of answering, Kyuhyun just skate his way out of the rink. “Oppa! Jamkaman!” Jae Kyung  yelled, trying to catch up with Kyuhyun but unexpectedly fell. “Ouch!” She whined, rubbing her . Kyuhyun looked back and saw Jae Kyung fell so he  immediately skated back, offering his hand. But instead of Jae Kyung grabbing his hand as a support, she pulled Kyuhyun's hand, causing him to fall over her with their lips crushing. 

#END OF FLASHBACK#

 

 

 

MY POV

“That’s what happened.” Jae Kyung said after explaining. 

“Oh…” I said shortly before turning around and started walking back to the kitchen. 

"Eonnie I’m so sorry! I told you I didn’t know that you were dating!”

“Arrayo!”

“But aren’t you happy about the truth?”

“There’s nothing to be happy about.”

“Eonnie are you stupid?! You should be happy that it was my fault… That I purposely pulled him! It’s not his fault!”

“Okay, it’s not his fault.” I said, facing her. “And so?”

“Go back and get him!”

“And why would I do that?” I asked her.

“Eonnie, I know that you love him! So please stop holding on to your pride and tell him that you already know what really happened!”

“But… How about you? I know that you like him—“

“Eonnie I only like him, but you love him, right?” she cut me off as I slightly nodded. She just smiled, wrapping her arms around my waist. “Eonnie, if I just knew that you were his girlfriend, then I shouldn’t have stood in the way. You are very important to me, because you’re a really nice cousin… And I don’t want you to lose your loved one just because of a brat like me. Sorry…” 

“Thank you for being such an understanding cousin.”  I smiled as she pulled back from the hug. 

“Eonnie, aren’t you going to tell him that you know the truth already?”she asked.

“Maybe tomorrow.”

“Eonnie you should tell him now!”

“But—“  she cut me off by pushing me to the door. “Ya!” 

“Eonnie!” she giggled. “Oppa can’t wait until tomorrow! So go!” she said, finally stopping from pushing me. 

“Okay, let me just change clothes at least.” I told her.

 

After changing clothes, I finally opened the door, thinking of the right words to say. 

I was about to take a step when I noticed someone standing a few meters away from the door. 

“Jogiyo...”

“_____-ah…” he called as he rushed to hug me.

 

 

 

who do you think is that?? haha!! anyway, guys... i don't know when will i be able to update again... because i'm going to update my other fic... since i haven't updated it for a month! i know i'm such a bad author... =,= well let me explain things- i wrote 

Stupid Love, Why Don't You Just Die?  because i thought that this fic will end already, as i've said in the other chapter, right? but then i wanted to reach a hundred chapters... so i'm trying to prolong this story... but then i don't think i can do it. >.< i already have my ending, since summer! but i'm adding more chapters so that you won't forget this fic if ever it ended already. :) anyway belated happy birthday to Teukie oppa, to my sister-in-law Ara eonnie (hahahah!!) and advance to Heechul oppa!! <3<3<3

 

please leave a comment!! :)) take care!!

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Comments

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mingming
#1
Kyaaaa my feelssss, I can't wait for SJ7 comeback that's why I'm reading this one again hahaha
123testando #2
OMG~ I love this fic!
You are a good writer ^^
*starting to read all your stories*
sujualltheway13
#3
Chapter 108: gasp!! a sequel? yay!!
SwagKyu
#4
Chapter 87: I was reading this chapter on my bed and because I'm super emotional, I cried and got my whole pillow wet lollll
SwagKyu
#5
Chapter 51: What I think about Jong Hoon: he's hot
uniquegirl
#6
Chapter 108: Great storyyy!! I really love it ^^
gonna start reading the sequel now XD
xdryax
#7
I love this story :D !! You're a good writer :-) Kyu seems so cute in this story my heart cant take it -_- lol
jongkyuzee #8
Daebak!! Woahh~ I love this story! A round of applause~ ^^
kittyliss #9
Chapter 4: love your story :)
SapphireBlueHearts
#10
Chapter 1: OMG~ YOUR STORY IS DAAAEBAAAK ♥