Sandara was calmly eating her lunch at the cafeteria. She’s already hungry and she cannot possibly wait for Donghae or for Jiyong to come- though both of them promised to her that they’ll be eating lunch with her today. She’s really stressed out because of her school stuffs- because of her professors who let them read 20 pages of seatwork and have an oral defense about the said topic. She badly needs to eat ‘cos she’s afraid that she might collapse any time soon. She already consumed the food; as usual, her all time favorite sandwich, Donghae gave to her when they headed towards the university and after her 3 hours straight class, heck, hungry is just an understatement.

Dara haven’t noticed that Jiyong is already on her back and watching her intently while eating her lunch. And Jiyong can’t help it but smile upon seeing his Dara eating like she’s the only person inside the cafeteria. He already knew Dara, that she’s not really afraid of what other people will say about her, and that’s what he really liked about her. She’s very sure about herself. She’s not afraid to eat a lot, to laugh her lungs out or to show how angry she was- she’s confident, yet reserve in her won ways.

Sandara was eating profusely when she felt soft lips on her cheeks and saw that it was Jiyong. She gave him a soft smile, didn’t even remember that she’s mad at him, and then continued eating. Jiyong sat beside Dara. “You eat intently that you haven’t even noticed my existence. It’s as if you’re no longer excited when I’m not around.” Jiyong said, with a hurt tone. Dara gave Jiyong a look, like she doesn’t care at all, then continued eating, making Jiyong laugh for more. “And you haven’t change Dara, even for a bit.”

Dara swallow the last bite of her lunch then looked at Jiyong. “I’m hungry Jiyong, come on! You know when I get hungry I only talk with the food. No friends, no boyfriends- just food.”

Jiyong pinches Dara cheeks and smiled at her. Jiyong gave Dara the milk tea she usually drinks during lunch break. Even if they usually sent less time together, Jiyong makes sure that he has updates about her girlfriend- making sure that he still knows what are her favorite, what are her dislikes. “Take this to save your mood. You know, I still love seeing you beautiful smile.”

“But I already asked Donghae to buy me one.” Dara mumbled. Since Donghae is her boyfriend, he’s always there for her in situations like this- when she’s hungry. Donghae still makes sure that she’s full and happy all the time. Thinking about Donghae made Dara smile that made Jiyong stirred for awhile.

“Naah, you should accept this because I am your boyfriend.” Jiyong said, while smiling at her. He’s afraid of the emotions Dara is portraying so he decided to just don’t mind it. “Besides, Donghae can drink the milk tea since he like that one too.”

Dara just shrug then drank the milk tea Jiyong gave to her. She was still awkward in-front of Jiyong, in front of Kiko. She just silently sips the milk tea when Jiyong holds her hand and gently squeezes it. She looked at Jiyong and she saw the same eyes that look at her way back on their sixth grade.

“W-what?”

Jiyong gave her a soft smile. “Nothing. Have I told you that you’re so beautiful, Dara?”

Dara gave Jiyong a safe smile- safe in a sense that she didn’t plaster any signs of displease or approving smile. “Naah, I know I am beautiful Jiyong but, thank you, for acknowledging it though.”

Jiyong kisses Daras’ forehead. “I love you.”

Dara stirred for a moment thinking if she’ll tell him those same words or just don’t mind it. The love she felt towards Jiyong is now slowly fading away, after what she saw, heard and realized, the undying love she felt towards him slowly fades. Did you realize that I’m not a flavor of the month Jiyong? That I’m a kind of girl that you should respect and love? “I-I…”

“Ayow, wadup! Bro! Dara!” Donghae said. I came just on time, ing ! He’s afraid that Dara will say those same words so he come-up immediately. He’s afraid that Dara will confirm it- that she still loves Jiyong- and that will be the beginning of his miserable life. “Oh, you already had eaten your lunch?” Donghae asked, pertaining to Dara.

Dara gave Donghae a smile. “Yeah, got hungry even if you already gave me sandwiches.”

Donghae just shrug and sat next to them. “Bro, have you seen Kiko?”

“What about her?” Jiyong asked. “She’s didn’t show up earlier. She got sick maybe.”

Donghae gave Dara a knowing look. For Dara, she can’t help it but suppress a smile. She still can’t forget that epic facial reaction she saw from Kiko. The guilt, the anger and countless facial expression she portrays were epic. “After what she saw earlier, she still hasn’t recovered to that?” she can’t help it but blurted it out.

“Huh?” Jiyong asked, giving Donghae and Dara quizzical look. “You met her earlier?”

Dara nod, while drinking her milk tea. “She saw us, me and Donghae, holding each other’s hands at the hallway.” Dara said, as if it was just an ordinary sentence.

Jiyong looked at Dara and Donghae- his hands were tightly clenched and it was shaking because of his too much emotion. He was bititng his lower lip and asked the worse question he will ever ask to his girlfriend. “Are you… are you cheating on me?”

Dara looked at Jiyong and smiled at him. “Of course… not! Why would I do that? I am not the cheater here…”

Jiyong looked at Donghae, not even minding the words Sandara used. For him, that will be the last thing he will think as of now. “What the hell is happening, Lee Donghae?!”

“We’re just walking at the hallway and just talking about our term paper when Sandara suddenly holds my hand then continued walking.” Donghae said, giving Jiyong an apologetic look, but deep inside of him he wanted to tell him the truth- that Dara and him is cheating on his back. Life is fair and they should tell him the truth- even if in the first place, Jiyong was never fair. “Kiko haven’t heard Daras’ last words saying-“

“-‘This is what cheaters do: hold each others’ hands, kiss and worse, make-out’.” Dara continued. “We’re just trying it on ourselves, our term paper. What do cheaters feel when they cheat?”

Jiyong sighed and trying his best to calm himself. ! ing ! It was just for their damn term paper! He thought. He closes his eyes, trying his best to calm himself, then opened it and saw Dara and Donghaes’ stares. In Jiyongs’ mind, he shouldn’t act like this because he’s a cheater himself!

Dara holds Jiyongs’ hands firmly and squeezes them. “I’m sorry if I hold Donghaes’ hands, we’re just trying to feel how does it feel. Mianhe.”

“Come on, bro! We didn’t do anything weird. We already explained it to Kiko and well… at least we tried.”

“What do you mean?” Jiyong asked.

“She still thinks that we’re cheating.” Dara said, while giving a long sigh. “I-I don’t know why she’s thinking that way Jiyong. She’s… she might say this to you so I-I already tell you this, me and Donghae aren’t doing anything.”

Dara can’t help it but gave Jiyong a smile. She hated liars and she’s never a liar but look at what she is right now? Look at what hatred and love did to her right now? She becomes a girl she hated the most- cheater, liar and all at the same time. She’s acting like a but she doesn’t care. All she cares about is her hurt feelings- her heart broken into tiny and billion pieces.

Donghae gave Dara an awkward smile and taps Jiyongs shoulder. Even if he wanted to tell him the truth, he must protect Dara by all means- even if it means breaking someone else. Ahh, this is not a simple like anymore. He thought.  “Uhm, so see you later for our Political Science class, Dara?”

“See you later Donghae.” Dara said.

Donghae left Dara and Jiyong- enough from being Donghae, the secret boyfriend. He gave them a one last look before going to the library. I’m sure Jiyong wouldn’t notice anythgn… yet.

Dara sighed and tug Jiyong on his arm. “Come on Ji, we’re just doing it for fun!”

“Fun?!” Jiyong almost exclaimed but remained calm knowing that he has a reputation in the school- being the best SC President. He looked at Dara, straight to her eyes, and then tightly closes his eyes. He can’t see the honesty in her eyes and the way twitched? Damn! Is she cheating on me? “Look, tell me the truth—“

“I. Am. Not. Cheating. Jiyong.” Dara said. “Now, will you listen to me? I-I wouldn’t dare… ch-cheating on you!” Dara said, trying to act cool. She’s not confident on saying those words. But she has to lie and she will lie for the sake of her wounded heart. I am not bad, I’m just hurt. She keeps on saying it to herself. Love is fair in war… she thought.

“Okay, okay. I trust you Dara…” Jiyong calmly said, while giving Dara small kisses on her forehead. “I trust you and I love you…”

Dara sighed and gave Jiyong a weak smile. You love me but cheated on me. I trusted you before and now, let’s see how your ‘trust’ stands for me.

***

Donghae was clenching his fist tightly as he heard the door open. The class was cancelled so he has no choice but to go his dorm and study for the next day. He saw Suho entered the room while placing his glasses and his bag on his table. Suho didn’t even bother to say hi on him, maybe he’s also into his assignments.

Donghae sighed then stares at the ceiling. A lot of What Ifs were running on his mind. What if Jiyong and Dara aren’t really together? Or what if Jiyong don’t have feeling for Dara anymore? What if Jiyong is seriously in-love with Kiko and not to Dara? What if Dara will tell him that she loves him, and not Jiyong? A lot of What Ifs and nothing will be answered- at least for now.

They heard that the door opens and saw Jiyong came. And upon seeing Donghae, Jiyong can’t help it but smirked. This is the first time he felt something bad towards Donghae and he’s not really fond of that emotions. Donghae was like Jiyongs brother- they share secrets, even the dirty ones, and he loves him like a real brother. And upon remembering their conversation earlier, made Jiyong want to punch Donghaes’ face and wreck it. I can’t imagine him holding my girlfriends hands! Damn it!

“You early?” Donghae asked. Jiyong went towards the kitchen counter, with his backpack on his shoulder, and drank a glass full of water. “Did you walk Dara home?”

Jiyongs’ hold to the glass of water tightened but he remained silent. He places the glass on the counter and silently went to his room. Donghae sighed then continue watching the ceiling. He can’t believe that he fall for his best-friends girlfriend! The last time he checked, he doesn’t give a damn about Jiyongs’ affairs. Both of them should shut each others eyes and moth when it comes to their personal life but heck! Upon remembering Daras’ soft giggles and smiles to him made him feel go loco for her.

Suho sighed upon feeling the tension between the two. “What’s wrong?”

“He already knew.” Donghae said, but looked away. “Dara already explained it to him and I think he already understands. I just… I just don’t like how he seems not care for me, for our friendship.”

Suho looked at Donghae and taps his shoulder. “The moment you fall for his girlfriend, my friend Donghae, is the same time you stopped caring about your friendship.”

“ you.” He murmured.

“Chill, go out. Let this phase on your friendship slip- it’s just a girl.”

“Dara is not just a girl Suho…”

“Because you love her…”

“Damn!”

***

Jiyong sighed then went out to their room. He saw Suho drawing weird stuffs on his notebook while Donghae is just sitting in front of him- eyeing his hands as he draw a part of a human body.

“You know that heart functions only as a blood pumping organ and not controls the emotion? So yeah, people shouldn’t blame their heart but their brain!”

Donghae chuckled. “You sounded like a bitter nerd, Suho. Did you and your girlfriend fight?”

That’s what Jiyong heard as he went towards them. He gave Donghae a slight nod and Suho a tap on his shoulder. “You have a girlfriend, nerdy Suho?”

“Back off, jerky Kwon Jiyong! You’re ruining my handouts!” Suho exclaimed. “, dude!”

“Come on, nerdy boy. Don’t stick to your boring life with too much biochemistry-“

“Actually, it’s a higher form on human anatomy.” Suho cut Jiyongs’ words off.

“Whatever. Come on, chill. Let’s go clubbing? I heard Siwons’ club just opened last week.” Jiyong said, while raising both his eyebrows.

Jiyong loves clubbing because it’s his world- smoke, drinks, loud music and girls. In there, he’s not obliged to be the so-called ‘ideal SC President’ who always thinks about his reputation- he can be the real Jiyong. He can be the Jiyong who’s carefree and not reserve and chic magnet.

“Dud, midterms were fast approaching. I need to maintain grades.” Suho beamed.

“Maintaining flat 1? Well, congratulations Suho but you’re running for everything.” Donghae smirked. “Come on, let’s go clubbing. Let’s just free ourselves with these homework for tonight.”

“Yeah right.” Suho said, while rolling his eyes towards his roommate. They were never a bad influence to him. In fact, both Jiyong and Donghae were also maintaining grades but he’s more GC (grade conscious) that them. Perks of being a scholar. “Now that you’re here, how was your escapades Ji?”

Jiyong just gave them a smile but shrugs. “I’m being a good boy now.”

Donghae and Suho looked at Jiyong with a what-the--are-you-ingly--serious look. “P-pardon?”

“I’m getting serious now. I want to be with Dara and I’ll stop being ajerk.”

“What?!” Suho said, making Jiyong laugh.

“You sounded like you don’t like my idea Suho.” Jiyong said but deep inside, he was watching on Donghaes’ expression. Donghae remained expressionless but deep inside of him he was frantically worried.

Suho gave out an awkward laugh. “C-come on! How would I dislike that idea? You should have done that before, !”

Jiyong laughed and placed himself on the chair next to Donghae. “Yeah right. I should me the man Dara should want to. I should be the man for her life.”

“H-how about your flings? How about Kiko?” Donghae cant help it but asked. How about me and Dara? What will happen to us? Donghae thought. ! ing !

“Come on Donghae, they’re just my flings. I can easily get rid of them because we’re not committed with each other.” Jiyong said.

“H-how about Kiko?” he whispered.

“She will understand.” Jiyong said. “She already knows that I am in-love with Dara to begin with.”

Donghae sighed then looked at Suho. Suho gave Donghae a look, as if saying that he’s totally doomed. yeah, I’m doomed.

***

Donghae was walking alone towards the university. He’s not really used to this- walking on the campus early in the morning without Dara. He lived for months having a short conversation with her first thing in the morning. Their conversation always made Donghaes’ day- as if talking to her completed his life.

Donghae sighed upon realizing that what he had with Dara is not good and well, not healthy. He will never have Dara for his own because Dara belongs to Jiyong. Now that Jiyong is back to himself again- the one who’s crazy in-love with Dara and not the jerk one- he’s afraid that their secret relationship might end any time soon. He’s not blind or in-denial about Daras’ feelings for Jiyong. He knew it, he can feel it, that Dara is still into Jiyong.

He’s now walking towards the Architecture building when he saw Kiko from afar. She’s staring at something and by impulse; he looked at the same direction where Kiko is staring at. And he’s not surprise seeing Jiyong and Dara walking hand-in-hand. He smiled, the bitter one, and then walks towards her.

“You see how perfect their hands folded in each others hands, right?” He said, while staring at Jiyong and Dara. Both of them were laughing, probably sharing the same joke. “How are you Kiko Mizuhara?”

Kiko stares at Donghae and gave him a weak smile. “I’m here, hurting deeply.”

Donghae almost left out a chuckle upon hearing her words. “Pardon?”

“I am in-love with him Donghae, badly in-love with Jiyong.”

“I know. I can see it.” He said, as he stares at the two. “You know what; you better start moving-on Kiko.”

Kiko gave Donghae a small punch on his arm. She misses doing it to him because they don’t tug along these past few months. “Why would I? I’m in-love with Jiyong, Donghae, you know that since high school.”

Donghae smiled, then gently tugs Kiko towards him and gave her a friendly hug. “You’re hurting because you assume too much. Kiko, before you assume learn first from the facts. Don’t merely rely on the gestures he shows- ask him and confirm everything first.”

Kiko smiled at Donghae. “Yeah, I assumed a lot. A lot that causes me heart aches.”

“Jiyong never told you that he’s in-love with you.” Donghae seriously said, making Kiko gave a fake smile.

“Stop pointing it out and slapping the truth on me Donghae.”

“Just being your close friend here.” Dongahe said but he became serious. “Just move-on Kiko. Promise, the more you’re drowning yourself in that kind of love, the more it’s intoxicating.”

Kiko left out a small smile. “Then, you should move-on along with me.”

“H-huh? Wh-what do you mean?”

It’s now Kikos’ time to smirk. “We’re on the same page Donghae, same boat and same flight. You’re in-love with Sandara Park, the girlfriend of your best friend who’s unfortunately the one I love…”

Dara saw how Donghae hug Kiko and she can’t help it but stop. She’s making sure that she sees everything from their distance and she can’t help it but get irritated. At first you steal Jiyong from me and now, my Lee Donghae?! she thought. She wanted to hard to slap Kiko on her face and call her names but she just can’t! She’s with Jiyong and they’re at the school vicinity! And heck, she and Donghae were just secret couples!

“What’s wrong babe?” Jiyong asked. “Are you okay?”

Dara smield at Jiyong. “Y-yes, I’m fine.” Dara gave a last glance at Donghae who’s now hugging Kiko tightly. She can’t help it but clench her fist and bit her lower lip. She’s mad at Kiko for flirting towards Donghae but she’s madder towards Donghae for letting Kiko flirt in him! For Christ sake, it’s early in the morning! “Let’s go?” Why do I feel this way? What did you do to me, Lee Donghae?!

Little did Dara know, Jiyong saw how Sandaras’ eyes changes emotions and he can’t help it but get curious. He used to ignore it- Daras’ sudden change of treatment towards him and their sudden closeness with Donghae- but upon seeing it closely, he just can’t possibly ignore them by now and get worried. What is really happening here?”