Epilogue

When would you consider a heart a Cheating Heart?

“Hello, my name is Lee Donghae. I am Jiyongs’ best-friend.”

“Hi, my name is Sandara. I am—“

“Jiyongs’ other best-friend?” he said while chuckling.

“No, I am his girlfriend.”

Dara remember it all- the very first time she saw Lee Donghae. It was… an awkward event of her life. She’s with her boyfriend and she felt something weird towards the best-friend of his boyfriend- the guy sitting in-front of her in the cafeteria. She never felt something weird towards someone else asife from Jiyong and this... this is new to her system.

‘Ahh, maybe because he’s his best-friend…’ she even consoles herself. She didn’t give a damn every time she’s left with him: the library conversation, every time they’ll go to the cafeteria to eat or even when he walks her to her dorm.  She didn’t mind it because she knew it’s bad to felt something weird towards Donghae. In the first place, it's not good.

Having a little crush isn’t bad, right? She keeps on asking herself in every waking day of her life. She must admit it; she had a crush on Lee Donghae. Who wouldn’t? He’s cute, he’s nice and he’s intelligent. He’s always there for her every time Jiyong is not around. He cares a lot at her and she somehow develop something in the process. It's inevitable. But the thing is, she had a boyfriend. And her boyfriend is the best-friend of Lee Donghae.

Maybe life …

They can’t have what they want.

She loves her boyfriend…

They can’t have what they want.

Her boyfriend is her crushes’ best-friend…

They can’t have what they want.

But she then realized that having him for her means getting herself in a lot of trouble. A lot of s. And then, she found herself being hurt and all. And all she ever had is the guy named Lee Donghae. Her breathing air. Her emergency toolbox that’s willing to fix her. The guy who makes sure that she’s still alive even if she’s broken. The guy who makes sure that… everything’s going to be alright in the end.

***

What really happened for the past 6 years? What really happened to us, Dara?

Donghae kept on asking himself while watching Dara walking down the aisle. She’s very beautiful while walking- wearing her broadest smile she could wear. So the theory is real- bride really looked beautiful in their wedding day. She’s blooming with too much love as she stares at him… or maybe at the guy behind him. Donghae doesn’t know. He only stares at her like she’s the most beautiful woman his eyes landed on. He’s picturing an image that he’s the one she’ll marry and not the guy beside him. Not anyone else.

The background song is still playing- it is his cue to just stand there and watch Dara walk towards him… or maybe at the guy beside him. He watches her intently as she embrace her father and mother. He watches her as she mumbled something to her parents and smiled. He’ll watch her marry someone else; and he’ll watch himself slowly dying.

It happened too fast. Too fast that he find himself being skeptic and cynical at the same time.

Last month, they’re celebrating their 3^rd year anniversary. Yes, they really made it. Although in the middle of their ‘open-relationship’ something came and someone came into their lives.

Dara met someone else in the Philippines and dated them. Donghae also dated other girls and bedded sme of them. Their communication stopped as they started to part ways: Donghae graduated Laude and got good ratings in the Board Exams. He works in the largest construction company in Korea as one of the highly paid architects. Dara, on the other hand, graduated on time in the Philippines. She works at the advertising company and even does some modeling if given the chance.

They parted for 3 years. They made their own life for 3 years. They created their own path for 3 years.

And it seems like their fate were interconnected, they met again in one of Daras’ project in Hong Kong. She’s on the field when she bumped into Donghae who happened to be the architect of the condominium that their company will advertise. They talk about their lives for 3 years without each other and even exchange numbers. They communicate just like what old-friend do. And well, the rest is history.

“What is your name again?” Donghae asked the guy beside him. The guy Dara is about to marry. Screw him. He’s her ex-girlfriend and he never have the guts to ask the name of the guy beside him. He never even realized that he’s one of the best men of her wedding. Best man… just the best man.

Why am I even called as the "best man" if I'm not the best for her?  He asked himself. But again and again, the words that Dara used to Jiyong is keep on repeating in his mind. 'You're the best... it's just that you're not the best for me...'

The guy beside him smiled. “I’m---“

Donghae didn’t hear the answer of the guy beside him because Dara is already in-front of him. She was smiling to her father as the guy next to him approached Dara and her father. He gladly accepted the hands of Dara as they started walking towards the altar. And that hit Donghae.

Will he be a coward forever? Will he just stand there and accept the defeat without giving a fight?

It happened so fast. Dara told him that she cheated. She was crying and all he can do is to hug her and accept her. Maybe, that’s how selfless he was. He’s willing to accept her no matter what happens. But Dara told him that she’s pregnant. And unluckily, he’s not the father. It seems like his whole world stopped as she told him that she’ll marry the guy who made her pregnant—and that’s the guy beside him. He didn’t cry- he just hugged her. It happen so fast that he found himself being the best-man of her wedding. He keeps on asking himself how it happened. Why did it happen? The last time he checked, they’re both happy. Both contented to what they have. He didn’t cry and didn’t tell Jiyong that he’s hurting inside. That despite the smile he keeps on plastering is a broken man inside.

Deep inside of him he believes in magic. He believes in their 3 years. He knew Dara wouldn’t just dump their 3 years just because she’s pregnant with someone else child.

He looked at the guy beside him- the luckiest guy of them all. He was opened his mouth and shout- but the words he wanted to say weren’t there. He’s opening his mouth and his mind is screaming but his voice isn’t there. He stares at the crowd; everyone was watching Dara and his groom and no one even saw him. Their whole attention is towards them. He wanted to cry and scream but he can’t. It seems like the whole universe is saying that he must not contradict to what is happening right now.

Donghae found himself crying as he watch Dara and his groom exchange their vows. He was weeping as he hears Dara says ‘I Do’ to him. He’s trembling and his breathing hard.

“N-no… n-no… please, n-no. NO!” he shouted.

“Donghae!”

And just like in movies, Donghae opened his eyes but harshly close it as a very bright light met his gaze. He wanted to open it but he has no idea what he’ll saw. Is that a dream or a reality? If that was the reality, he’d rather stay asleep because dreams were more wonderful than reality. He can still feel the pain inside his chest and he knew he’s still crying. It seems real. True. The pain and the emotion he felt seems real. He doesn’t like the feeling. He hated it. He’s biting his lower lip as he suppresses his sobs. He doesn’t like the thought of Dara and that strange guy, or of any other guy. It hurts him.

Donghae felt a soft, warm hand touched his cheeks. The familiarity is there, he knew it was Dara, but he choose to close his eyes and continued crying. He’s sacred. For the very first time, he’s scared. He’s scared to loose Dara. He’s scared to open his eyes and realize that it was real. That it’s not just a nightmare.

“D-donghae…. boyfriend…”

Donghae slowly opens his eyes and saw gasped as he saw Dara in-front of him. Alive. Not wearing a wedding gown. And he’s not wearing a tux. They’re not in a church. And she’s not marrying someone else. Dara is in-front of him wearing her favorite shirt he owns. “H-hey… don’t scare me… It’s just a dream.”

Donghae has no words to say. He hugged Dara tightly. He wanted to feel that he’s alive. He wanted to feel that this is the reality. “I-I thought…”

“Are you okay? You’re crying again. I-Is that the same nightmare?” Dara asked Donghae.

Donghae didn’t utter a word. He just hugged Dara tightly. This happens every night and it’s scaring him. It’s like a premonition that someone might steal Dara away from him. And he’s scared- scared of losing her, of losing his life and his sanity. “Please, marry me Dara… I’m begging you, please.”

Dara sighed. She hugged Donghae tighter and even kissed his hair. They’re too close but she didn’t mind. Being close to Donghae means being alive. “I can’t, Donghae. You know I can’t because Jiyong and I promised that we’ll not marry on the same year.”

“I so hate your first love and my best-friend.” Donghae muttered.

Dara sighed and broke the embrace. She cupped Donghaes’ face and look at him intently. “We’ve been together for 3 years already Donghae. We can wait for another year, right?”

“B-but I’m scared…”

“I am not going away. I am not going anywhere…”

“But my dream… It seems real. I’m scared everyday Dara. I’m scared that in the middle of the day where I am not with you, you’ll meet… you’ll meet the guy in my dreams and fall. I’m scared Dara. I love you that much that the thought of losing you kills me. Everyday Dara, I’m scared everyday…”

Dara kissed Donghaes’ lips. She started to deepen the kiss and Dara felt Donghae kissed her back. Their lips were locked with each other and it was the liveliest kiss they’ve shared for the past 3 years. Donghae put his hands inside Daras’ shirt and started to roam inside. His hands found the familiarity with Daras’ body and it gave him the same feeling.  Donghae started to kiss Daras’ neck going down and down.

But Dara was the one who broke the intense kiss. She was chuckling as she heard the groan from Donghaes’ mouth. “I am not leaving you, okay? Now, we have to go.”

“Do we really have to go, girlfriend?” Donghae asked. “Maybe we should start doing—“

“Come on Donghae! Would you miss the chance to see Jiyong, your best-friend, marrying his girlfriend?”

Donghae rolled his eyes. Yes, Jiyong is marrying his girlfriend today. And being his best-friend, he’s the one who’ll stand as his best man. “In my dream I was your best man too.”

Dara chuckled and gave Donghae small kisses. “Come on. The call time for the maid of honor is 3 hours from now.” She said in between kisses.

“Tss. You should thank yourself because I love you.”

“Thank you boyfriend. I love you too.” Dara said while laughing. Donghae can’t help it but smile. Dara is his life and he can’t dare to loose her.

***

Donghae is standing near the altar wearing a gray tux and Jiyong is also with him- he’s wearing a white tux. The whole preparation is very fast but perfect. Jiyong seemed relax as he stands-up beside him.

“You seem relax?” Donghae can’t help but ask. “You’re that confident that she’ll show up, huh?”

Jiyong taps Donghaes’ shoulder and smiled. “Of course.”

The wedding march started and Donghae can’t explain his feelings. It felt like he’s the one who’s getting married and not Jiyong.”Do best men felt weird like this?”

“What do you mean?” Jiyong asked, while smiling.

“I am nervous! Damn it, I am freaking nervous even if I’m just the best man!”

Jiyong laughed. “I don’t know.”

“Stop smiling. You’re being creepy Ji.”

Donghae looked at the flower girls walking. They’re really beautiful and he can really see Dara bearing his children. They’ll live in a comfortable house with big play ground and they’ll be good parents: the perfect father and mother. They will feed their children with love and care. Damn! Why would we wait for next year? Argh! I so hate Jiyong. He thought.

“I hate you, Ji. If you didn’t marry this year, maybe me and Dara will get married by September.” He mumbled, making Jiyong chuckle.

“Oh, you’ll love me bro.”

“Eww. I don’t do bromance, hyung.” Donghae answered while chuckling.

The wedding march changed song. The brides’ maid started to walk and it was Kiko Mizuhara walking. She’s very beautiful walking down the aisle and Donghae can’t help it but look at Jiyong. “You don’t regret it, right? On not pursuing Kiko?”

Jiyong chuckled. “Nope. What we have is part of our past.”

“Okay.” Donghae said while shrugging.

When your legs don’t work like they used to before

And I can’t sweep you off of your feet

Donghaes’ eyebrows furrow as he hear the familiar soft voice in the background. It was his favorite song- the song he loves to sing to Dara every time they’ll sleep.

“I didn’t know that you love Ed Sheeran.” Donghae commented but Jiyong just shrug. “And your singer, it seems familiar.”

Will your mouth still remember the taste of my love?

Will your eyes still smile from your cheeks?

Donghaes’ eyes widened as he saw Dara walking down the aisle wearing a long gown. Dara is walking with a bouquet of flowers in her left arm while the microphone is in her right hand. She’s smiling widely at him and even waved her hands. The whole thing didn’t sink-in in his thought that fast. Donghae felt the slight tap and the annoying laugh of Jiyong beside him.

“Now you know the reason why I am not nervous.” Jiyong said, teasing Donghae.

And, boyfriend, I will be loving you ‘til we’re 70

Dara sang as she started walking down the aisle. She’s smiling and half-running and half-walking. Her beauty radiates and the soft chuckles of her voice filled his whole system. He still can’t believe that he’s marrying the woman he loves!

And, boyfriend, my heart could still fall as hard at 23

And I’m thinking ‘bout how people fall in love in mysterious ways

Maybe just the touch of a hand.

Well, me- I fall in love with you every single day

And I just wanna tell you I am

Dara stopped walking because she’s now in-front of him. She’s smiling and her eyes were misty. Is she crying? Donghae can’t move so Dara approached him by touching his cheeks.

“I-It’s real…”

“Of course! Stop crying, boyfriend…”

Donghae realized that he’s silently crying. He’s trembling like an idiot. “I am marrying you, right? I am here, alive and kicking. I am here and not marrying anyone else. I will marry you Donghae, whether you love it or really love it!” Dara said making the witnesses of their wedding laugh.

It was Donghaes’ time to roam around the whole church and saw that his parents and Daras’ family and friends are already there.

“H-how?”

“Because I’m awesome.” Dara said while chuckling. “So, are you ready to be with me? Not forever but every waking day of our lives? Not as Dara and Donghae alone. But as Mr. and Mrs. Lee Donghae?”

Donghae nods and embraced Dara. He kissed Daras’ lips lightly. He’s too happy to notice the laughter of the crowd. He’s too happy to notice that the priest is already there. And all he ever knows is that he’ll marry the girl he loves. He’s very over-whelmed.

“Come on Donghae! You should hear her first say I do before you kiss her!” Jiyong shouted.

Donghae smiled and faced the priest who smiled at them too. “Please father…”

Maybe, what screws us up most in life is the picture in our head of how it is supposed to be.  We picture it out that our life should be like this and like that. We don’t know that unexpected things happen with our simple choice.

Dara went to Korea for Jiyong but went back to Philippines having Donghae on her heart. With her simple choice- cheating on Jiyong to get even and amend her broken heart- made a big difference. The process is not good but the end justifies it all. She picture it out that she should end up with Jiyong, but fate seems like playful.

With their cheating hearts, they find each other.

Dara found Donghae.

Donghae found Dara.

The self-less cheating heart who cheats on his brother Jiyong.

The broken heart that choose to cheat to amend everything.

At the end of the day, she’ll choose Donghae…

-The End

2015-02-26