Jiyong was staring at Daras’ hands, her fingers intertwined with Donghaes’ fingers, which is placed in-front of him. His brows were knotted, eyes thinly and keenly eyeing on their hands.

Holding hands.

Skin to skin.

Held tightly.

He looked at Dara and he cannot see the aura of ‘troll’ in her like she always does when they’re still little. He can clearly see the seriousness in her face and it made him realize that what is happening right now is real. True. His body is heating up and tensed and he can clearly feel that he wanted to punch Lee Donghae, his best-friend, right now. What the is going on?

Donghae was shocked upon seeing how Dara hold his hand in-front of Jiyong. He didn’t see this coming. He didn’t imagine this to happen- this soon! He always says that if this will happen, he will make sure that he can speak. He though that Dara will never find her guts. He looked at Dara who’s looking straight to Jiyongs’ eyes. “Dara…” he mumbled.

“I am cheating Jiyong.” Dara said, straighly looking to his eyes. Her emotions are building up and she knew, she’ll explode few minutes from now. She kept this to herself and the last 3 days made her realize her worth. She’s being taken for granted and she doesn’t like it. No one liked it. “I am cheating on you.”

Jiyong shook his head while chuckling. The idea of Dara cheating on him is not registering on his mind. She can’t cheat on him! She just cannot. He holds Daras’ hands whose holding Donghaes’. He untangled it and smiled at her. “Better luck next time Dara, I won’t buy it. It’s not funny, you know.” He even shook his head and started to laugh. He looked at Donghae and Dara. “You almost got me there, babe.”

Dara twitched her lips, making Jiyong stop from laughing. She tsk-ed and watched him intently. She wanted to make sure that she’ll leave Jiyong a scar on his heart. “I am cheating on you, Kwon Jiyong.”

Jiyongs’ mouth was hanged by a moment. He looked at Donghae, a death glare, and smirked. “Seriously?” His breathing isn’t normal anymore and he’s afraid that he might end up punching Donghae. His chest was moving. Inhale. Exhale.

“Jiyong…” Kiko said while holding his arm. She was taken aback because of the sudden turn of events. 3 days ago, she was begging to Dara and now she easily got what she wished for. She bit her lower lip as her eyes landed on Daras’ and saw different emotions- pain, disgusted and anger. It’s very evident and she can’t help it but looked down. She never sees this coming. She… drastically change.

“Stop playing around, Dara. It’s not funny anymore.” Jiyong hissed. His hands were tightly grinding with each other. His knuckles turned into white with the pressure he’s giving.

Dara put her hand on Donghaes’ hand and intertwined it. She looked straight to Jiyongs’ eye for him to realize that she’s not joking. “I. AM. CHEATING. ON. YOU.” She said, giving emphasis to every words she speaks.

Jiyongs’ hands landed on the table as he taps it, loudly, making the other customer of the café looked at their way. “I said stop playing jokes!”

“Jiyong…” Donghae mumbled. As much as he wanted to say sorry, he’s not at all. Jiyong deserves this, he just knew. But they’re best-friends! Yes, they’re like brothers. He loves Jiyong like his own brother.

“Why are you acting like you’re affected anyway?” Dara asked while smirking.

“Because I am your ing boyfriend!” Jiyong shouted, making the other customer inside looked at their way. Jiyong is being irrational this time and he wanted to punch himself for being so… ed-up. His emotions were building up. The pain and remourse. Is this the what they call karma? Because heck, it’s killing him. “You’re cheating on me?! The , Dara! The !” Annoyance is audible in his tone.

“Stop acting like you’re not doing it all this time, Ji. Stop acting like you’re a naïve boy because you are definitely not.” Dara said firmly. She smirked as she traces her eyes towards Jiyong then to Kiko. She’s disgusted with the two. Most especially with Jiyong. “I know you and Kiko we’re cheating on me since day one.”

Jiyongs’ face become pale as a sheet of paper- even Kikos’. His eyes widened and he lost his breath. So she already knew! How? He thought. His body stiffened as he watches Dara. The sweet, naïve and innocent Dara are gone. He slowly tilted his head as he looked at them. He’s starting to laugh like a retard to hide the nervousness he felt. He’s already caught but he would never ever tell her that it’s true. “Geez! We’re not cheating on—“

“Don’t fool me, Jiyong. I’m not that blind not to see and not that numb not to feel.”

“ it!” Jiyong hissed as he stands-up and looked at them. He’s watching Donghae, asking for his help, but Donghae can’t look Jiyong in his eyes. Even if he want to give Jiyong a lesson, it’s still hard for him to hurt his brother.  “Kiko and I were just best-friends!”

“Wow! So, kissing and making-out is a best-friends thing, huh?” She sarcastically said. “I hate you for lying to me, Jiyong! Just… wow!” Dara stands-up and started walking, tagging along Donghae who’s very silent. Donghae cannot find a way to speak because Dara and Jiyong is the focus of the conversation from the very beginning. He just walks along with Dara. The woman he loves. The reason why he cannot look at Jiyong in his eyes. The reason why he forgets about their bro code.

“Dara!” Jiyong hissed as he grabbed her other arm. It made both Donghae and Dara stop. His grip on her arms is getting tighter, as if his life depends on her. Which is true, his life depends on her. “You cannot possibly do that to me. I love you and you love me too!”

“But you cheated on me.” Dara said, giving emphasis to her words. Cheated. Damn. It stings, even if she already knew that long time ago. “In the very first place, you should have told me that you don’t want me as your girlfriend all along! Just… damn it, Ji. I thought we’re okay. I thought… I thought when I came back we’ll be happy again.”

“I love you! Come on! Let me explain, Dara, please.” Jiyong said, tormented. He tried pulling Dara close to him, but Dara remained stiff as she looks at Jiyong. She’s disgusted about the idea of Jiyong and Kiko and the other girls he bedded. She closes her eyes and imagines the scene she saw: when Jiyong kissed Kiko in the mall and when Jiyong kissed a . It made her realize that Jiyong is a total jerk. Why did he do this to me? To us? “Kiko and I… we’re just best-friends.” Jiyong doesn’t care if he sounded like he’s begging for his whole life. Heck! Dara is his life.

Dara holds the hand of Jiyong that is holding her arm. She harshly pulls it away from her. Trying to escape. For what? For whom? Her subconscious mind asked her. “I am breaking-up with you. No, scratch that. Let’s call it quits.”

“No! Dara! Let me explain!”

Dara didn’t look back as she heard Jiyong still calling for her name. She bit her lower lip and suppresses her tears. She wanted to cry. She wanted to weep. But is she does it, will Jiyong change? Will her tears change the fact that she was taken for granted? That he cheated on her? That she was hurt?

She felt a big, soft, warm hand holding her hands. It enveloped her small, trembling hands; she looked at the hand and then to the owner of it. It was Lee Donghae. The guy who never left her all this time. The only guy who was there whenever she needs of someone. The only guy she could run at this very moment.

The guy she loves. And loves her back.

For the first time, after three days of thinking, Dara can feel she’s already home. Donghae squeezes Daras’ hands and smiled at her, making Daras’ heart flutter. She gave him a heart warming smile. This is what I want….

***

Three days ago…

Dara found herself inside the café of his cousin, Park Chanyeol. Chanyeol is the only cousin she had that is very close to her since then. Her other relatives were aloof because some of them were very rich; but Chanyeol, even if they’re rich, he never let Dara and never let her feel that she’s different. They’re cousins. They love each other.

“Are you okay noona?” Chanyeol asked.  He’s not used to this- Dara being silent- because she’s definitely not. He even remembered that whenever they’re together, almost all of their relatives kept on ranting about their voices- they really thought that we’re a walking mega phone. Most especially if his older noona, Park Bom is there too. “Are you sick?”

Dara shook her head and smiled at him. Chanyeol is such a dear cousin. She’s at his café and she’s looking for Bom- his older sister. “Where’s Bom-unnie?”

Chanyeol shrugs and continued mopping the floor. “Probably with her boyfriend.”

Dara sighed. She sat down on the chair near the counter. The ambiance of his café is different compared to the cafes here. This is 3 miles away from her dorm. Chanyeol is the first person that crossed to her mind when she thinks about escaping. She needs to escape. To run. To hide. To think. To… reflect.

“Do you a girlfriend, Chanyeol?” Dara asked.

Chanyeols eyes widened as he stares at his noona. “N-no!”

Dara smiled. “Keep on lying, little boy.”

“I don’t have one!” Chanyeol hissed.

“But you’re dating?”

“N-no.”

Dara laughed. “Okay, let’s just say that I don’t have an idea. That I didn’t saw you earlier—“

“You saw us?!”

“Gotcha!” Dara said while laughing. “I knew it!”

“What the!”

Dara laughed as she saw the epic expression of her cousin. Geez! Her eyes got misty and her stomach crunched. She never laughed like this ever since she came back. Naah, I laughed like this everytime I’m with Lee Donghae. She thought and it made her smile. Wide. “I have a question.”

“Hmmm?” Chanyeol said, without looking at her cousins eyes. He’s still embarrassed since he never let anyone saw him and her so-called ‘girlfriend’ talk. They seldom talk. In public. But he’s not embarrassed at her girlfriend. He’s proud, but he’s afraid that some girls will hurt his girlfriend. Most especially, the sasaengs. He’s quite popular in their school, that’s the reason why.

“Why can’t we love two persons at a time?” Dara asked, while looking at the window from the café. She can see cars and some bicycles. “Why?”

Chanyeols’ eyes widened and it made him realize that his cousin is hurt. She’s in pain. The reason why he can make her laugh that easily. The saddest person can be the easiest to laugh. But deep inside, they’re hurt. Sad. Lonely. “I… I actually don’t know.” Chanyeol answered. “I do believe that hearts aren’t meant to love just one person.”

“Why? So you’re telling me that it’s okay to love two persons at a time?”

“Maybe, yes. Maybe, no. I really don’t know, noona.” Chanyeol said while letting out a sigh. “You see, it’s just a muscle. A muscle that functions as the one who gives blood to our whole body. It pumps. It stretches. It grows. To maybe accommodate everyone, anyone, you wanted to love. Why do we find ourselves fall for one and to another? Why do we love our parents? Our friends? Heart… it made room for feelings and for emotions that contradicts to the fact that it… it just pumps blood. That the real emotion-organ is the brain.  Maybe that’s the reason why it has four chambers.” Chanyeol said, while chuckling. “It made room for everyone, for us to love them. The only difference is the greater space being occupied by the special someone.  Anatomically speaking, there’s a chamber of our heart that is bigger. Probably, that’s where we put our special someone now.”

Dara smiled. She looked at her cousin Chanyeol and hugged him. Tightly. “Thanks, little boy.”

Chanyeol blushed and then hug his noona back. “If you’re sad noona, remember that I am here. Always.”

Dara nods and closed her eyes. She can clearly feel the pain. The anger. It’s… still fresh. And she hated it. She was never born to be an option. She may be the eldest but the love of their parents was fair and square. Equal. She had things that her siblings had. She bit her lower lip and try her best not to sob. She’s still in her cousin’s café when someone put a coffee on her table. She opens her eyes and saw a small-shouldered guy put it.

“I-I didn’t order anything… yet.”

The guy, who is smaller than her cousin Chanyeol, looked at her. His eyes were… round. It’s quite big. Not the usual small eyes from any Korean guy. And those eyes… it penetrates deep inside of her. It was like he’s scanning her soul. “Chanyeol gave it to you.” He said, while pointing his lips to her cousin. “You okay, noona?”

She gave him a warm smile. “Neh. Thank you for this anyway.”

“I’m Do Kyungsoo.” He said. He stretches out his hands but not for a shake hands but to give a handkerchief to her. “You’re crying.”

Dara taps her cheeks and felt the warn liquid on it. She’s unconsciously crying. She’s in pain. To the nth time, she can say that phrase. She’s in pain.

As she went back to her dorm, it’s already 10PM. Kyungsoo along with his best-friend Kim Jong-in walked her home. With her cousin Chanyeol. She was very happy to know that someone still cares for her. Especially now. She decided to go home late to avoid everyone. She even asked Chanyeol to let her stay with him on his café for three days just to avoid confrontations.

When she was about to open her door she saw a sunflower on the doormat. Dara kneeled down and pick it up. She smile upon seeing the not with it.

I may not be the best boyfriend but I’m definitely not like the rest. Always remember, I love you. –D

She smiled. The only thing that is right as of now is just… Donghae. She’s glad he’s with her. She may doubt herself, her feelings towards him, right now. She doubts because she’s sharing a Cheating Heart with Donghae. It… it made the concept about love very, very low. Love do bring people low, indeed. She becomes as low as Kiko- she cheated. All of them cheated. She blames everyone- Kiko and Jiyong- why she become like that. But it’s her choice to cheat. She can’t blame no one. She can’t blame Jiyong nor Kiko. She can’t even blame Donghae who just offered for a helping hand. To get even.

But, why did everything end up like this? Why is she hurting the most? Why should everything start in a wrong foot? In a cheating heart? In a heart full of anger and pain?

She remembered what did Kyungsoo said awhile ago. “Sometimes, what is right doesn’t mean it’s the best. Or vice versa. Think, noona. For the best. Choose and learn to love yourself more than anyone else.”

Dara smile as she entered the dorm. She’s happy to talk to her cousin and to his friends, Kai and Kyungsoo. A little space, even just for a day, made a big difference. It made her realize few things: one is to love yourself. And second and the most important thing is to forget about the cheating. To forget about the situation. Just choose and no matter how much I invested my feelings towards Jiyong, I’d still choose the best guy for me. At the end of the day, I’d still choose… Lee Donghae.