Taeyeon can barely concentrate at work, though her employer-friend keeps telling her that her DJ-ing hasnt become rusty at all, she knew that she wasnt putting her 100% to it. She wasnt putting her heart to it. And it frustrates her. A month since she came back to Korea, A month that she stayed back at her hometown yet it changed all her way of living that se has for four years now. As if her body still hasnt cope up with the weather and time zone and food..there's so many and's that she can add up to the list that she once had problems too the first time she came in the country. And as if it was her first time again, her mind can only think of the girl she left back in America, Jessica.

It wouldnt be that hard for her if only Jessica did what she had Taeyeon promised to her. If only Jessica send her off. It might not be like this right now. Since Taeyeon brought Tiffany to her home, she noticed that Jessica hasnt been calling her like usual. No more drunk calls or text messages, nothing at all and when its only a day before her flight she called Jessica to inform her but the girl never picked up, she went to Tiffany's office only to find out that Jessica took a sick leave. Taeyeon went to the Jung's but her Auntie told her that Jessica went on vacation with some friends. If it wasnt Jessica, Taeyeon might probably believe it, but its Jessica. Jessica has no other friends other than those people who Taeyeon called as soon as she left the Jung's porch but no one said that Jessica contacted any of them. Having no news about the girl, Taeyeon left with a heavy and worried heart. Althought after she arrive in Korea, Krystal contacted her and told her that Jessica went home the next day after her flight, she's still worrying. They were okay, or atleast that's what she knows that even though she was trying to get away from the girl, Jessica is still pulling her back and thats okay, right? So she dont know what could possibly happen that all of a sudden, Jessica was the one who ran away. 

It was one of those nights where Taeyeon was out partying with some friends Tiffany introduced her to after days of seeing each other on the club she was working at. She wasnt really that close to them but they make a good company specially on fun nights. She got herself wasted to the point she dont even know how she got home, but she's home and surprisingly enough, she's alone and still in her clothes, not one of her clothing was ripped off of her. Very unusual indeed. And as if Tiffany knew what she was out doing last night, she saw 300 messages and 57 missed calles beaming at her on her phone's screen, all coming from the girl. She read it all, and finds it really amusing how Tiffany can be so sweet and scary at the same time. Yes, she was threatening her but everytime she did, there's a sweet message right after. Taeyeon finds it really cute. She finds Tiffany cute, someone who would be so blessed to have and she was so happy she was the one. Tiffany is understanding, too much if Taeyeon will be asked, but that's Tiffany. She wont be Tiffany if she isnt and sometimes Taeyeon can only hope that the girl would just stop understanding her, or let her have her way and to just yell at her, scream at her whenever she does something stupid. Taeyeon sometimes thinks if its too much to ask.

 She was in the middle of replying Tiffany's last message when her phone rang, number's unidentified but she's sure its Tiffany since the country code was USA's. 

"Hey baby.. I was just typing you a.." She started but was cut off immediately by a voice who she knew so well doesnt belong to Tiffany but to someone her heart was aching for, for years up to this date.

"I hate you.. I ing hate you." Taeyeon instantly knew that the girl was drunk, considering the shaky voice and the down right curse. "I hate you for hurting me. For leaving me. For choosing her over me. I ing hate you but I love you.. I ing love you.. Please come back to me.. I need you in my life."

Taeyeon heaved a sigh, hearing Jessica cry on the other line again breaks her heart, she just wants to fly back to America in an instant but she knows she cant. Not when she knows exactly why her bestfiend is like this again. She massaged her throbbing temple before answering, "Sica..Listen, Im not Taecyeon. Im not him. You cant always make me listen to everything you want to tell him. Im not him."

"I love you Taeyeon."

She stared at her phone, the call long ended and those four last words she heard before Jessica hang up swirled inside her head, echoing inside her ears. It rejolted her heart once again just like that night, that night when something happened between them only to be disappointed that it wasnt for her but for him.  So this time cant be any difference. Jessica is drunk. She says a lot of things when she's drunk so how is Taeyeon to know if Jessica did mean what she said?

I love you Taeyeon.

She frowned, hearing exactly how Jessica said it inside her head. It scared her and confused her at the same time. Cause even how many times those words rammed her head she still cant make herself believe that she heard it correctly. No, she mustve heard it wrong. Jessica couldnt possibly said her name. But its so clear, she said Taeyeon not Taecyeon. Her brain reason out, a part of her wants to believe it but she doesnt want to assume anymore.. She doesnt want to assume something she's been so wanting, wishing, hoping and dreaming to happen for years and only to be disappointed again in the end.