Pages by pages I looked as Kibum’s voice appeared behind me, “Minho’s mother?”

Two days have passed since Minho asked me whether I will come to Incheon with him or not. And since my mother hasn’t told me about my family’s plan for the holiday, I still hasn’t give my answer to Minho. Well, actually that’s only one of the reasons.

I nodded without looking away from the magazine on my lap, and once again he speaks out, “Of all our mothers, you just met Taeminnie’s, right? Well, mine is witty, JongHyun Hyung’s is funny, Onew Hyung’s is… How can I say, calm? Then Maknae’s is as adorable as her son, while Minho’s mother… She’s a typical Korean mother, I guess.”

I looked at Kibum. Right now we’re on the dressing room, there’s only the two of us since we’re here because there’s something wrong with his outfit so I gave him another one. He just went back here after changing at the men’s room.

Then I get up to help him with the collar and say, “Is it a bad thing, or good thing? That you said she’s a normal Korean mother.”

Kibum looked up with his finger on the chin, “Hm… You know what I mean, bad if you’re not her kind of ideal type, but good, I guess if you are.”

I slightly pushed him and say, “Can you be more abstract than that?”

You might wonder why I talked about this to him instead of anyone else; well you know how Kibum is always honest. And I think Kibum can be subjective too as I want to ask him about what should I wear if I really going to Incheon with Minho in Chuseok Holiday.

I said ‘if’ because I haven’t give my answer yet.

“Well, she’s a charmer, totally like Minho.” Kibum shrugged, “Don’t worry too much, Noona. Minho fell for you so hard then maybe his mother would like that fact too.”

I rolled my eyes, “I highly doubt that.”

“Why, wait, don’t answer it. Lemme see,” Kibum moved to stand in front of me and then he folded his arms, “Wow, yeah, I can see those doubts in your eyes.”

Obviously, he’s making fun of me.

“Oh, shut up Kibummie!” I throw a fluffy cartoon character doll to him as he catches it.

“Hey! Be careful, one of my fans gave this to me!” He said but then he laughs at me, “Relax, Noona. To be honest, I was like that to you because I never seen you like this.”

I sighed. I know.

“I know,” I told him, “But don’t, don’t you dare telling Minho that I’ve been asking about his mother.”

He frowned, “Wow, you totally freaked out, didn’t you?”

“Yeah.” I mumbled. Even when I met Hae Jin’s mother for the first time, I’ve been dating her son for almost a year so she already heard about me from him. But now it’s a different thing.

I continued, “Because it seems to me that Minho hasn’t told his parent about having a girlfriend. And out of the blue, he brings me. Imagine what could possibly happen?”

Kibum chuckled, “Minho is really close to his parent, and maybe he already told them about you. At least, his father. They meet a lot during those recovery times, right?”

Yes, Kibum’s right.

“Nah… you guys doesn’t really talk about it to your parents.” I shook my head.

Then he shrugged again, “I don’t know about the others but I would definitely tell mine if I’m finally dating someone because if I wouldn’t, then my mother would strangle me to death.”

“Wow.” I lifted my eyebrows.

“It’s because… My mother always wanting to have more children, a daughter would be perfect, after she had a son –me, but her health condition wasn’t allowed her to, so... yeah. It would be great if she can be close to my girl, she said.”

I looked at Kibum who’s now squatting in front of me. Despite the fact that he’s the most straight-forward one in the group who sometimes even makes an enemy without knowing it, and behind those small investigating eyes, Kibum is really a good son in his family. I'm not saying that the other isn’t like that, but Kibum is the one who doesn’t really show it in front of the others. Well, at least until that episode of Strong Heart where he told a story about his beloved grandma.

I’ve been told by Minho that Onew called his mother almost every morning, and then I have seen myself Jjong is really protective towards his Noona. Taemin was embarrassed when I found out, but in his study desk in his room, he had a picture of his mother hold him in her arms whenever he’s just a new born baby. And of course, everyone can easily see from Minho’s eyes on how proud he is of his father every time he talked about him.

Kibum actually never shows, except maybe the fact that I know he often goes shopping with his mother. I knew that only because he called me once, asking about whether I knew there’s a new shopping area around the town since he and his mother seems already went to every place.

“It’s going to be great if she knew Nana-sshi, isn’t it?” I winked playfully to Kibum and he almost fell to the floor.

“Y-Yaa, Noona!!” He exclaimed and I was laughing really hard.

“Come on. We’ve been here for too long, everyone’s waiting…” I get up but then he said, “So you decided to come?”

“Where, oh, to Incheon?” I asked as he’s reaching out for my hand to pull him from squatting.

“Yeah, although I was a bit surprise when I heard from you he invites you to come along.”

I rolled my eyes, “Do you think I wasn’t? I actually don’t know what to do. I'm not really good on something like this.”

Just so you know, even thought I think Taeminnie will know about this later eventually, I actually only tell Kibum about this, because of the reason that I’ve mentioned earlier. It’s also because I don’t want the other think that I thought this is some kind of a big deal. Although it is. Not in the sense about ‘it’s almost like Minho proposed me’ kind of sense, but it’s almost like… how Minho finally invite me to know deeper to his own life that I’ve never even step in before.

But to him, it seems that this is just like visiting his family on the weekend and then brought along his girlfriend casually. Well, I don’t know if that’s normal in his house, but this is not how I get used to. Like I said, my parents are far in Busan and I practically lived here in Seoul since I was in high school. I lived with my uncle’s family at that time before I lived alone since college days. And back when I was in Canada during younger years, we don’t actually bring our crush or so-called boyfriend to our home, right?

Kibum shrugged, “Well, if he was so casual when he asked you like you said, then I think it’s really just a normal visiting. Don’t worry too much you will definitely hurt yourself in the process if you try too hard.”

I chuckled and as we walked out from the room, he pointed to the magazine I held close to myself, “But I think you can pick that one on the… I don’t know if I’m not mistaken, the third fashion spread there’s a nice navy blue blouse. It’s decent but still has your style in it. You can forget those y sabrina top since this is a first visit and Minho himself shows so much hatred on that one-“

“I know that!” I laughed as I cut his words. But I have to admit, Kibum’s ability on picking some point is really admirable. Sometimes I wonder if he has photographic memory.

Then I answered his early question, “But no, I haven’t answered yet because my mother hasn’t told me the plan of this holiday. They will come to town.”

“Oh really,” Kibum responded, “And you plan to take Minho to meet your family too? Although…” He seems like he can see it through my expression, “Seems to me you don’t have that plan in mind.”

I shook my head and then I said in a relatively small voice, “They thought I’m still with Hae Jin Oppa...”

Kibum stopped on the empty corridor and he looks really surprise, “… Wow, Noona. I thought you hated the fact that he dumped you because of no reason.” Tsk, you don’t have to be that harsh, Kibum, you didn’t know that Hae Jin actually came back to meet me, did you? But then again, you have a point.

“Well, I might be someone’s nightmare,” I shrugged, “Like you are. But in fact, I'm a good daughter just like you are to your parent. So let’s not talk about this…”

And when Kibum opened his mouth to say more, I was faster by pointing at him, “And you know who dumped who.”

“You and your pride, Noona.” He just smiled his proud smile after he heard me as suddenly someone appeared in front of the door.

“Ah, you’re here. Hyung was just sent me to find you.” Minho said to Kibum and he took a glance at me then smiling before he turned around, asking us to follow him.

Kibum looked at me and I just gave him the ‘don’t dare to say anything!’ look.

‘Okay, fine. I let him alone.’ Kibum mouthed to me behind Minho’s back as we walked.

And I realized now there’s a member who knows something about me… that I haven’t succeeded in telling Minho about.

I wonder why I'm like this.

--

We’re now at the office. Outside it’s a bit windy and somehow the air is chill maybe because the dark clouds is covering the sun.

I blew out the smoke from my lips as I tossed the lighter on the table. Right now, the boys are having an interview for some magazine so we, the stylist staffs can rested for a while as we re-check the stuffs for their comeback and also music video –MV shoot tomorrow.

I saw one of the A.M, its Lee Oppa, walking into the leisure room. He came to make a coffee I guess. As he saw me and Sun-ah, he smiled. You know, after I was told by Manager Oppa about his so-called ‘assignment’ related to Minho, I began to feel a bit uncomfortable towards Lee Oppa because he also got the same task.

I was kind of nervous to be near him I was afraid if he suddenly just going to mention about the task we both were ordered to do. And about Manager Oppa himself, don’t ask. I was literally acting when he’s around. And it means like, every single time. I act like I was cool, and although so far I think my acting was convincing enough and he hadn’t ask about how the result of my so-called investigation towards Minho up until now, I can’t help being so paranoid each and every day. Wondering and waiting when he will finally come up to ask about it.

Then I heard from behind,

“Noona, I finally quit.”

I turned around and saw the striking look Jjong stood there as he fixed the cap he wears.

“Did the interview finish already?” Sun-ah asked him.

“I finished mine first since I don’t really need too much time to answer the sheets and also I got talked with the reporter first.”

“You said you quit? Ah. You mean… this?” I lifted the cig in my hand, followed by him nodding.

My assistant laughed and claps cheerfully as I patted Jjong’s arm playfully but hard enough, “Yaa... What makes you did, wait let me guess, that pretty pretty fairy, isn’t it?”

I personally love T-ara’s EunJung-sshi looks and sometimes I can even believe that we shared the same birth year because she looked so cute and sweet. That’s why this couple really interesting to see because the fact that EunJung is actually Jjong’s Noona by two years, but he’s definitely look older. And then because the girl is so calm, the loud JongHyun could be tamed.

Well, people said opposite attracts, right?

Jjong laughs as he said his girlfriend’s nickname, “EunJungie? Well, she’s one of my reasons.”

Sun-ah responded, “I can’t really picture how she is when she’s mad, though.”

I nodded agree and then Jjong replied, “Oh, she can be funny and not as calm as she looks, but it’s true that she’s so patience.”

I frowned, “But I got the impression, also from the boys, that you two were often arguing.”

Jjong paused for a while that’s why I corrected my words, “I'm sorry, I didn’t mean to intrude. It’s just-“

Then he laughs as he walks to a vending machine nearby to buy hot milk tea before he pulls a chair beside me and sit down.

“Nahh...” He waved his hand, “It’s true we often argue. But it was me, well, most of it.”

I frowned, “You?”

“Yeah… But like she always said, because I’m younger she can tolerate it; for me to cause a mess and everything.”

Sun-ah stood up as she seems to call someone on the phone and left us to walk to the corner alone.

“And you’re okay whenever she said that?”

Jjong looked at me, “What, that she pointed that I’m younger… or the fact that I caused a lot of mess?”

I rolled my eyes, “Both, maybe.”

He shrugged, “Well, both are facts, so what can I say?” then followed by our laughs.

“That’s probably would be our main reason to be argue too, Minho and I.” I sighed, pretend to be tired.

This handsome boy in front of me looked surprise, “Minho? But he probably wouldn’t act like me… right? He’s like, the father of the group.”

I laugh uneasily, “That’s why. He’s mad every time I pointed about age and stuff.”

Then he took my cigarette box and while he looked at it, he said, “Well, don’t judge us only by counting how long we’ve been living on this earth just because we’re younger, Noona.”

I shook my head, ignoring the topic as I bring out a question that always came into my mind when it comes to Jjong, ”Actually you and EunJung-sshi, how the two of you do to make it this far?”

He seems to think about the answer for a while so I added, “Both of you are idols, and not to mention people would notice… Am I right?”

Then he nodded, “Yeah, yeah of course they could. But... except the ones who really close to us, I mean, members of my group and hers, also maybe those managers… the other people doesn’t really know about it.”

“Really?”

“Well, yeah.. The other people might’ve heard something about us, but since we never really showed it in front of them, and we don’t have any intention to do it, so…” He hung his sentence but I got it.

“But then what, you two never really have a date outside... or anything?”

He laughs, “That’s sort of a silly question you got, isn’t it Noona?”

I laughed at my own mistake as I realize what I just asked him, “I corrected, I mean, yeah, how you two could be so good with this kind of relationship? Like you just said, with no one knows and you can’t go anywhere. Not to mention, what if someone finds out about it?”

“Hey, you dated a famous person before you might already know the answer.” Jjong pointed it out as he sipped his drink. But to see my expression, he continued to really answering my question this time, “We had a date, from time to time, but yeah I can count those dates just with my two hands, I think. You see, I love my girl and probably will always do... But I’m the type of person who lives for today so I won’t bother to think about what’s not happening for the time being.”

“How about her?” I can’t help but wanting to know what this 88er girl had in mind and also want to compare her way of thinking with mine.

“Jungie?” Jjong put away the cig box to the table and said, “She’s… I guess I’m lucky to find a girl like her. She’s complaining about how we couldn’t met while our schedule is really at the crazy peak or when there’s no shows or event for both our groups to meet up at, it’s normal, but she never really blame our relationship. Maybe it’s because she has the same job as mine, but I think it’s also because she’s being realistic.”

“And… Did she ever mention about what could possibly happen with you two if one day it got blown up, I mean, well, you know what I mean.” I asked him.

“Then it could be the end of it.”

“What?” Wow. Talk about being realistic.

“Of course we have talked about this, and if I’m not mistaken, at that time she said that it’s something we couldn’t avoid, but then again even without any of it another thing can comes up to break our relationship. What she meant is aside from the fact that we both what we are, so-called idol and everything, anywhere anyhow we’re just in a relationship and being a couple like any other people, right? We also have the same issue like them. So she said we will talk about it when the bad things really happen. If it’s not, then we should just continue our life like we always does...”

“Wow.” Now I really said it out loud. Twice. “Wow. What a girlfriend there you got, Jjong.”

“Yeah, I hit the jackpot even though I'm just being the messy Jonghyun.”

I laughed, “Messy but with a romantic voice like you, of course no girl would say no to you. Well, except me.”

Then we both saw Taeminnie, followed by Minho and the others walked out from the interview room, so then Jjong grabbed the empty can and stood up.

“You asked how could Jungie and I get this far? Well, the simple answer might be… it’s because I trusted her. Everything that she’s been trying to do up until now is for the sake of us anyway.” He shrugged as then he smiles before he turned around and walking towards his fellow members.

I was still sitting there, staring at the 5 of them who’s now going to have a meeting with the music video’s director. Minho looked at me and smiles so I doing the same thing, smiling back at him with thoughts filled my mind.

Onew actually aren’t going to join the meeting because he has to go to the musical, and I will go with him for today.

I stood up and gather all my stuff on the table to join them in the meeting room, my phone is beeping.

Whereismylock: Noona did you bring your car today, didn’t you

I frowned. Why would Kibum ask something through instant messaging like this, especially since I was on the same floor and soon will meet him too.

Nu.Na: Yes why

Less than 10 seconds he replied.

Whereismylock: Great so later you can take my son to change his hair color

What? Taeminnie?

Whereismylock: Oh and Minho also need a haircut for the next MV said the hairstylist

Well, the boys got hairstylist but it’s also common for them to actually go by themselves to a hair salon which usually take care of their style. Although when they got the hair done, the group’s hairstylist was going to be present too. But then again, why do I have to take them, where’s Manager and A.M Oppas?

Nu.Na: Where’s your Manager Hyungs

Whereismylock: They stayed for the meeting with staffs but also took care of the MV setting first

Nu.Na: But why are you the one who telling me this
Nu.Na: Why not them
Nu.Na: And why not Minho

Whereismylock: Relax actually I'm the one suggested to use your car
Whereismylock: Don’t worry they won’t think about anything else
Whereismylock: Hyungs are busy their head might gonna explode soon

I sighed. Well, you don’t know what’s inside their head either, Kibummie, no matter how mighty you are.

Before I can reply, his message comes once again.

Whereismylock: Kang Hyung left the room with Onew Hyung he might gonna ask you about the car

As I read it and continue to put my stuffs inside my bag, I looked up because I heard someone’s calling my name.

It’s Kang Oppa, and exactly like what Kibum said, the A.M Oppa asked me,“After you went to the musical, can you drive Minho and Taemin? They need to go to fix their hair for tomorrow’s filming.”

“No problem.” I shrugged and saw Onew was behind A.M Oppa.

“Great.” He replied, “Now hurry, we need to be on the auditorium earlier. Beside, Onew hasn’t eats his lunch yet.”

Onew is laughing, “Hyung! You know it’s fine.”

I snorted, “Yeah right, you can’t handle the temptation every time there’s one piece of fried chicken in front of you.”

The almost-22 years old replied to me with his cheerful smile, “Oh, that’s a different case, Noona.”

“Let’s go, you don’t want to waste the meal your fans prepared for you, right?” Kang Oppa was being considerate today.

Onew’s eyes were sparkling as he nodded his head excitedly just like a child who gets his ice cream. And so then we walked out from the building to go to the place where he will perform his musical.

--

I walked around unknowingly that there’s a pair of eyes who actually has been staring for the past minutes.

“Noona. Why don’t you sit down?”

I looked at someone who sits on the floor, leaning his back to the huge mirror inside the practicing room, already on his costume but still less make-up on his pretty face. On his hand there’s a pack of meal box that has a sticker shown a cartoon version of himself.

“Ah, wait a sec. There’s-“ I said but he cut my words.

“I know there’s nothing, since the boys aren’t here and I already in my performance costume.” Onew said and then he just gives me a meal box, “You know the fans make this so I can share to everyone.”

“But I doubt they allowed you to share with me if they knew I ‘took’ one of their idol.” But I took it anyway from his hand and sit beside him on the floor.

“You mean, Minho?” Onew said as he ate the meat, “Well, I don’t know if it’s for Noona, the girlfriend of Minho, but the fans told me to share it with the ‘hard-working staffs’ too, so…”

I laugh, “Thanked them for me, would you?”

He nodded as then I just looked at the meal box but not even open it. So after a while, he speaks out again.

“It’s delicious, but you have to open it first, Noona.” His pronunciation sounds funny because his mouth is full, I can see from his puffy cheeks.

“And don’t you know that you better not talk with your mouth full?” I back.

“I know. I just can’t help it. Beside, here I’m the youngest, so I can act clumsily however I want.” He shrugged and continues to eat but somehow, his words made me think.

Onew is the oldest one among the group, not to mention their leader, so wherever the boys’ go, he’s the one who everyone expected to act and to be responsible because of his age and the position on his group. And eventhough the insider like me saw how Taemin scolded him when he did a mistake, or how Key always won over his leader, we all know that no matter what, the other boys are actually respected Onew so much. Not only because he’s the leader, but also because behind those childish smile and attitude, we can depend on him.

Well, like I always thought about Minho, even someone who’s dependable or reliable, sometimes need someone else to rely on, right? In that sense, Minho and his leader is the same. But the different is, at least Minho have found someone to share, while Onew haven’t. And whatever his reason is, he seems doesn’t want to find one so it makes me think that maybe in one point he’s really pushing himself too hard.

“Onew-sshi, can I ask you something?”

“Hm? What is it, Noona?” He said without lifting his head and still eating.

“Do you want me to introduce you to someone, I have a lot of nice junior, you know-“ I stopped because suddenly he’s choking and end up coughing like crazy.

“God, here.. here.” I immediately took a bottle of water and he takes it from my hand as I patted his back firmly, “What the hell, Onew? Did I say something wrong??”

He drank the water and tries to breathe for a second, as I’m waiting until he can breathe normal again before he replies.

“It’s because you’re surprising me!” He laughs a bit, though.

“What? I'm serious…”

“Eh?”

“Eh?” I repeated him and then speaks with a smaller voice, “Yeah, Jjong and Minho has a girlfriend, Key have this endless crush while Taemin, well, he’s just being cute but wanting to find a crush for himself. But how about you?”

He shrugged, “I'm fine.”

“Fine is only another word to escape from the real answer.” I said.

Then he sighed, “Minho was right, there’s no use to try against you, Noona.”

I laugh, “That flaming boy said that? Wait until I met him later!” Then I actually thought about what if I meet him later, I’ve been hiding something from him. Honestly, lately it makes me feel a bit uneasy to be around Minho when there’s no one else, that’s why I'm not so happy with Kibum’s idea about me driving Taemin and Minho –wait, ah I knew it. Kibum planned this so I can talk with Minho. Dammit.

Onew is staring at me, that’s why I didn’t say anything and let him to speak since we’re having a conversation right now.

“I don’t know, maybe it’s because I set my mind to focus on work up until now, well I’m not saying that the other members are not focus, but I think it’s the advantage on being dongsaeng, while being the oldest means you have to at least be focus slightly even more.”

“But you don’t have to be harsh on yourself, you know.” I said because I was surprise enough to hear his explanation.

He laughs, “No, there’s no such thing like that, Noona. I don’t feel burdened. Besides, up until now I think I still lack of ability being a good leader for them. So if I can fulfill at least just one of their expectations, I would be happy to do it.”

“Such as?”

He shrugged, “Well, I don’t know… In example, Taemin always mention that being a leader is tough because it means he has to sacrifice more than the others. When I heard that, I feel like maybe it will be cool if I do that, but in fact, there’s nothing cool about it if you didn’t do it sincerely because it’s just like he said, to sacrifice something is one hell of a work.”

I still listened to him as he continued, “So… I think as I begin to determine on try to become a good Hyung for them, my mind unconsciously put aside anything that I feel unnecessary to think about, then of course, my feelings also got set aside.”

“Wow.” I murmured, I never thought that the happy-go-lucky Onew is really like this.

It seems that he heard me so he added, “But it also maybe because I haven’t met the right one too, I guess.” And laugh a bit after saying it.

I just looked at him and then I ask one thing that I always want to ask him, “And about the members having their relationship, endangered the group’s image and position inside the management, what do you think about that?”

He stops eating this time and then he looked at me, “Honestly, Noona?”

I nodded.

“This is between you and me, and believed me, I said this not to make you worry, but I just want to be honest with you.” He said as suddenly I feel my heart beats faster. What does he think about Minho have this relationship with me, actually?

“I was worried.” He said, “To keep this group unite and strong, it’s the part of my task, so I can’t help it. But then again, they’re not robots. Those kids have feelings, so I also try to understand them although it means they’re disobeying the rule. I just… hoping that they realized, I mean, they really understand what the consequences.”

I gulped unconsciously as I heard him. Really, I’ve heard Onew talked with the boys, and every time it’s getting serious, usually Taemin would try to neutralize the atmosphere because it’s also seemed that he feels uncomfortable on getting his leader into that kind of situation. And now I understand why.

When Onew become serious, it’s like… we were pulled into this atmosphere he created until we can’t walk out from it unless we agree on what he said or think. It’s like there’s no escape from those clear and once seems like a naïve eyes.

“About me… and Minho..” I hang my sentence because Onew speaks out.

“Don’t worry Noona, I think Minho is totally aware while Jjong is more loose. Because he even asked me to tell him if I notice something or feel that Manager Hyung is suspicious-“

“But he already is.” I cut his sentence.

He frowned, “He? You mean, Hyung?”

I nodded and then he said, “How do you know? Wait, did he know about your relationship?” His voice becomes smaller to prevent anyone hear our conversation.

“That’s… I also didn’t know the answer.” Then I told him about what Manager Oppa told me to do, and about Lee Oppa also involved in this, “But I don’t exactly know whether Manager Oppa actually know that the girl is me or not. I cant read him. He might saying that to me because he knew it’s me, but he might really don’t know about it.” I sighed.

“And you didn’t tell Minho about this?” Onew seems surprised.

“I don’t know how! And besides, what will he do after he finds out?” I said.

He seems to think for a while and then he said, “I just thought that you told him everything.”

“Oh you didn’t know how much I’ve been hiding from him.”

He frowned, “You… Noona, you-“

“No, no, wait.” I corrected my words immediately because I think it would make him upset if he thought he was helping to protect an unworthy relationship, “Look, it’s between you and me, okay? I told you this because you’re Minho’s leader and Hyung. I actually kept worrying about this relationship and thinking so hard how to protect him without telling him about it. That’s what I’ve been hiding from him.”

Of course I didn’t tell Onew what I said to Kibum earlier, that I havent tell my mother that I broke up with Hae Jin because if I did, it makes me feel that I’m going to send Kibum and Onew against Minho. But in the same time, somehow it makes me feel guilty even more because I kept telling my secrets to the others but not to Minho.

“Oh, okay.” He nodded, “That’s your personal thought about your relationship, I wouldn’t dare to intrude.”

I nodded and thank him for his consideration.

Although then he added, “But I think… he has the right to know about what Manager Hyung told you. At least, it’s because he’s the object of suspicion in this. If he knew about this, then he won’t act recklessly, and also he wouldn’t feel like he’s the only one who doesn’t know about this. Minho hates to feel that way because it makes him the fool. I think you knew that, right, Noona?”

I'm thinking about what Onew said, and he’s got the point.

“And even though I don’t have any experience before, but I think if I have a girlfriend, I would prefer know something related to our relationship from her first than from anyone else. Because it will make me feel that she believes in me.”

I looked at him, find myself dumfounded because suddenly he smiles his usual smile which makes his eyes disappearing into think line while saying, “But maybe it’s just me, heheh.”

No, Onew-sshi, we both know that what you said is right. And thank you.

--

Nu.Na: Hey this is one of your plan, isnt it

Whereismylock: What plan

Nu.Na: So then I can talk to Minho about Chuseok

Whereismylock: Well if you think so that so be it

I sighed. Really, this kid.

Nu.Na: But didn’t Manager Oppa feel weird about this

Whereismylock: What are you talking about Noona
Whereismylock: It’s not something unusual
Whereismylock: You drove us many times when it’s urgent
Whereismylock: Besides trust me I convinced Hyungs
Whereismylock: They don’t give me Almighty name for nothing

Nu.Na: yes but

Ah, stupid me. Why did I send it? Kibum didn’t know about everything I’ve told Onew earlier. Now he would be suspicious.

Whereismylock: What is it
Whereismylock: Unless you have something to worry about

As I read it, I thought about something. Yeah, actually my mother just sent me a message earlier when I'm still at the musical auditorium.

She said that we’re going to my grandparents’ grave on the second day while one the first we would just going to have dinner together. As I'm thinking about that, actually I can still go to Incheon since Minho said it’s about lunch time.

But no, I'm still with my first answer, I’m not ready for this. The only problem is just how to tell Minho without turn it into arguing. That’s the least I need right now since I also owe him something to tell.

Nu.Na: No it’s nothing

Whereismylock: So where are you

Nu.Na: I'm on my way back to the office
Nu.Na: Kang Oppa told me to go first because the task you make me to do

Whereismylock: Great they already in the leisure room waiting for you

Sighing because I can’t say anything, I just look at the window of the train although there’s nothing to see. Blackness of the subway tunnel greets me. Though it seems funny and a bit unbelievable, Kibum does great in doing everything.

Then again, as much as it seems he didn’t do it intentionally, he does admit to be the one who becomes the cupid between Minho and I. And we admitted him too. I thanked him, I really do, the proud leader of 91ers Kim Kibum.

But I'm sorry Kibummie, really, in cases like this sometimes I wish that you’re not that mighty. Or naggy.

--

My pace became slower when I almost reach the leisure room, and then I found two of the members sitting there. Doing something exactly the opposite, but fitted their image somehow. I stopped at the door just to enjoy this view for a while.

Taemin is sitting on the floor with a puppy in his hand, facing at the entrance so I can see his big big smile on his face while he talked to the white toy poodle, and patting its head lovingly even sometimes he cuddled it because he can’t take its cuteness. Well, here I’m also dying because I can’t take your cuteness, Baby.

Minho, on the other hand, leaning to the sofa and give his back at me. But I can see over his shoulder, he’s reading a book, holding it by one hand while the other is spreading straight to the left on the back of the couch. I can’t help to laugh a bit, thinking how similar his pose to my fathers’. At that time, he speaks out and talked to Taemin,

“Hey, you better give the puppy back to its owner before Noona is here so we can go right after she’s arrived. We didn’t have so much time, Taem.”

“Ah, Hyung, but she’s so cute!” Baby replied with an unrelated answer to his Hyung’s question and it makes me laugh louder.

The two of them turns their head and Baby gets up to run towards me with the dog in his hand.

“You’re here, Noona.” Minho said from where he’s sitting so I nodded to him while Baby exclaimed when he showed me the cute little creature, “Look, look Noona! Look how cute she is!”

I want to take the toy poodle from him but to see Taemin, I just can’t do that, he seems to love the puppy so much. Call me weird, but I think you will think the same if you see this kind of view.

So I patted the dog’s head and ask, “What’s her name?”

“Bear.”

“What?” I laughed, “Isn’t it too grand for such a cute little one like her?” I bent down so I can look closely to Bear.

“Yes, the vice-president says it’s from polar bear, but it shorted to just Bear.”

“What’s in a name anyway?” Minho stood up and walk towards us.

“So it’s the vice president’s dog?” I asked them and Taemin nodded.

“I was allowed to play with it for a while because I unknowingly ran to Bear when I saw them in the lobby earlier.” Baby smiled sheepishly.

I can easily picture it, how Baby ran clumsily and just grabbed the puppy from the floor to his arms without noticing the company’s vice president was holding its leash.

Minho patted the dog’s head but then he said, “Noona’s here, so let’s go.”

Taemin pouted as he replied to the meaning of Minho’s word is to give the puppy back, “I don’t want to.”

I smiled and say to him, “You miss your puppy, don’t you, Minnie?”

He nodded as then I replied, “Don’t worry. You can see it during the holiday soon, right?”

Looking at me, then he smiled, “You’re right, Noona.” And shifting his stare to Bear he said, “I'm gonna go to find Vice President first, then I’ll meet you at the basement.”

I nodded, “B2 floor, okay?”

As he left, I said to Minho, “What?” because he’s staring at me.

“Nothing.” He shook his head and smiling slightly, “You seem to always have this kind of power over him, or everyone. That’s what I really admire from you.”

I laugh, “What I just said is a normal thing to say, right?”

“Yes but still if it’s coming from me, I don’t think Taeminnie would listen that easily.” He shrugged.

“Yeah but I also have my moments when I was in Taem’s position, in example, under the spell of Kibum.” I chuckled.

Minho laughs, “Oh, you mean to drive us around?”

“Talking about him, where is he?”

“He went to see his father because he’s in town.”

“Oh, okay.” I replied as we both walk to the elevator.

Somehow, family-related conversation reminds me of Minho’s plan for the holiday but I remain silent.
And it seems he also got reminded because then he asked me, “So… got the answer from your mother?”

I looked at him as we’re now inside the elevator.

“Yes.” I kind of hang my sentence because I still can’t decide what to say, yes… or no.

“… And?” He asked.

I sighed, gripping one of my hands to my cardigan out of nervousness before I answered him, “I'm sorry Minho, but I think I can’t go.”

He’s just looking at me so I continue, “I mean, I… Look, maybe it’s nothing for you, but it’s not for me. You can call me paranoid, but the fact is I'm not ready yet.” There, I said it.

Staring at his hand, then he nods, “Okay then.”

I studied his expression, he seems does really okay with it, or in other words, he took my answer easily.

“You’re really fine with it, right? I… it doesn’t mean that I don’t want to meet your parents, no-“

He lifted his head and look at me, “Of course I know.”

“I dated someone over a year first before I finally met his parents, so it’s just… to meet yours, especially your mother, I was wondering what will she think of me. I don’t even know whether you already told them about me or not.” The question that’s been inside my mind finally came out.

“I might’ve told them unintentionally, I think. Not in detail, but on the last time we met for my therapy, I said I was going to meet someone –it’s you, and even though they’re not asking any further, they knew that it’s a girl.”

But you havent told them about what I do, or anything like my age in example, have you Minho?

“You better don’t say a girl because they would think that you meet someone who’s illegal or still in high school.” I .

He looked at me as he answered me back casually, “They knew I was going to meet a girl because I said Noona.”

Okay. Now you got me here, Minho. “E-eh?”

He shrugged, “Well, that’s the reality, right? I’m not making that up nor hiding it.” His words shot through me and it makes me feel a bit annoyed; to him but actually more to myself. He said I have the power over Taemin or anyone, but he surely has this ability to make someone feel guilty towards him so easily.

“And…?” I asked him.

He laughs, “They didnt give any comment, why? That’s why I also didn’t tell you. I might already boasting around at you if they seems impressed by my ability that despite this girl is being more mature than me, this son of them actually can steal the girl’s heart so easily and not think of me only as a younger kid or something. But my parent don’t say anything, well, maybe they’re not surprise at all.”

Damn you, Minho. Damn you.

I'm still in silent when he said, “But it’s okay if you can’t go, to be honest, this is new for me too so it’s a bit nerve wrecking.”

I turned to look at him, “So in your house, you’re not just bring your girl to meet your family or anything?”

He laughs, “What are you talking about? Of course not, did you forget that the last time I have a girlfriend is during high school here in Seoul so how can I take her frequently to Incheon? Although it’s only about an hour or so from here.”

So what I’ve been thinking is wrong. It’s his first time ever if he’s really going to take me to meet his family. And I’m selfishly think that with my own experience with Hae Jin’s mother is already difficult enough.

See, Minho easily makes me feel guilty even more.

“But they’re okay with the fact you dated someone, even when the management not allow that?” I asked this naïve question.

He shrugged, “Since I was a child, they taught me to be responsible on anything I do and choose –aside from my dream to be a soccer player, I guess. During high school, my grades are still good even though I was also debuting with the members, so they wouldn’t –or couldn’t, say anything.”

So I learnt that Minho’s parents already know my existence although it’s not in detail, while mine still know nothing. Really, I never feel this bad.

As we walked out from the elevator, Minho said, “Relax, my parents loves me too much to tell Manager Hyung about me seeing someone.”

Okay, that’s not coming into my mind until you brought it up, Minho.

I just smile a bit as I pressed the button to open the car key and then he reaching out his right hand, “I’ll drive.”

Then I laugh, “No way. You slept only 3 hours last night, right?”

“And you’re not?” He talked back.

“At least I can close my eyes for a while earlier on the subway.” I said, and because he still hesitating so I added, “Come on, to let me using my so-called power to win over you, it doesn’t makes you feel defeated, right? It’s me, your girlfriend for God’s sake.”

He looked surprise, “Then you really think it’s a competition too, when it comes to you?”

“So it’s not?”

Lifting his eyebrows he said, “If it’s just playing games or running on a track with you, I might still wanting to win, I admit that’s how competitive I can be. But talking about what happened in the relationship itself, of course I don’t treat it like a competition. How bad exactly do you think I am?”

And it seems that we’ve start an argument.

Still with the car key in my hand, I saw Taemin walked out from the building door to the basement and as he looked at us, he walks towards my car.

I answered Minho shortly, “I'm just joking, Minho. Don’t take it seriously.” Before I open the car quickly and get to the driver seat.

Minho sat beside me on the front seat without saying anything and so Taemin followed by getting into the backseat and then closed the door.

“Noona, did you know that I'm going to be blonde this time?” He asked in his cheerful without knowing that his Hyung and I just left from an uncomfortable conversation.

“Really? Like how blonde? Ring Ding Dong?” I turned around to look at Baby after I started the engine. Both Minho and I pulled the seat belt and fasten it.

Without looking, my hand is reaching out to the air conditioner switch but Minho does it too in the same time so our hands touches one another. Then I took a glance, while my hand hung in the empty air, Minho’s already press the switch. I looked at him and understand.

He’s kind of upset about earlier so now he would just act as if this small thing is also a competition.

I don’t know whether Taemin aware about this or not, but he does staring at both Minho and I before he answered, “No, it’s… more than that.”

“Like Heechul-sshi?” I was surprised.

“Not that blonde, I think.” Taemin smiles shyly.

“But still, wow, now you will glow even more.” I looked to the front and start to drive as I’m laughing, “Our Minnie will be as bright as the sun, soon the dreamy sunflower girl he will find.” I with my so-called poet.

He laughs and clapping his hand in the same time, “I like it, Noona!”

Minho can see Taemin’s expression from the small mirror hanging in front of the seat as he seems to be pleased by his dongsaeng’s excitement too, but he doesn’t say anything.

Once Baby told me when he finally found the girl he likes –doesn’t matter she’s cute or not, then it must be a girl who’s just going to look at him and him only. Like the sunflower for its sun. I found it to the sense that he might use it for a song lyrics or something, and it’s freaking adorable I can’t help but remember it.

“Well, if it’s the case, then a girl like that is not really hard to find, Taeminnie.” Minho suddenly speaks out.

Using the corner of my eyes, I look at Minho and I said to Taemin, “Your Hyung is right, you know. There are many girls love you out there.”

Taemin moved forward so he leaned between the driver and the front seat, saying, “Yes but how can I know that she really loves me for me, not for Shinee’s Taemin?”

Once again I took a glance over Minho, but this time, he does too. More like we’re talking with our eyes, deciding who’s going to answer Baby’s question. And as Minho doesn’t open his mouth to say anything, I took this as this is my turn to speak out.

“You will know it somehow. But then again, being Shinee’s Taemin is what you are, right? So it’s something you can’t avoid, Baby. You can’t deny who you really are.” I smiled at him through the rear-view mirror and his smile grew for a little.

Minho joined by saying, “Let me tell you this, as a start, when you finally met this girl, bring and introduce her to us, your Hyung. If she doesn’t get waver by our charisma and just fixed her stare to you only, then you can be relieved, you might have found the girl.”

Taemin exclaimed, “Hyung! You talked like I wasn’t as good as the 4 of you!”

I laugh as I try to make Taemin understand, “No, Baby, I think what’s your Hyung trying to say is that the girl got to understand perfectly that you has something really special and not even Minho, Kibum, Onew, Jjong Hyung or any other boy has it. So it what makes her the sunflower girl, because she could only have one only sun and luckily it’s you.”

Then I turned to Minho, as if we’re not even had this uneasy feelings before, and say, “Am I right?”

“Yeah, pretty much.” He looked at me and smile.

Somehow I feel like with Taemin in here as our little kid brother, Minho wouldn’t show his anger towards me, even if he still has it right now.

I smiled back at him so then Baby said again, “It’s always nice to see you two like this, Noona, Minho Hyung, you two are like the younger version of my mom and dad.”

“What??!” Both Minho and I are laughing as I just drove out from the building.

Taemin is smiling ear to ear too, as then after he pulled on the joke, he leans his back to the seat and seems too absorb while looking at something on his phone.

The three of them driving in silent but then Minho turns the radio on.

“I like this song.” I said after last year’s SS501 song Love Like This played.

From the backseat Taemin sang, “Hey girl! Today you look even more pretty than before~”

I smiled but then out of the blue Minho talks to me as his eyes still fix on the book opened in front of him, “Yes, then maybe you will stop hesitating.”

To hear that, Taemin is still singing but I frowned. I know that the song is about a girl who still can decide about her feelings and decision although the guy wants her too.

“What do you mean?” I asked him as now we’re stopping at the traffic light.

“Even after all of this time, I seemed to always fail to understand you. I thought you have trusted me, but you’re not.” He said.

I looked at him and he sighed, “How long do I need to wait until you finally tell me, about what Manager Hyung told you to do?”

And this time he turned his head to look at me in the eyes.

What?

“W-what do you mean?”

Taemin stopped singing because he seems to be aware, but also he said to me, “Noona, the light turns to green.”

I quickly begin to drive and with my eyes fixed on the road, I asked, “You knew? About Manager Oppa had this suspici-“

“I just found out about it.” He cut my words. So he's been acting earlier?

“How, I mean, from who? Onew-sshi-“ I stopped my words as I knew it was a mistake.

Minho silence is his answer and it makes me feel even worst. But then he said, “So you told Onew Hyung but you didn’t tell me?” He looked through the mirror and asks Taemin, “Did you know about this too, Taem?”

“A-about what? No, Hyung.” Taemin shook his head and I can see from the mirror he looked confuse, because he really doesn’t know about it.

“Leave him alone. He knows nothing about this, Minho.” I said to Minho, “You havent answer my question.”

“This morning Lee Hyung told me. He just wanted to warn me, I think. And being a good Hyung, he tries to understand me, but as a good employee, he also has to respect his boss’ order.”

Shoot. How can I forget that Lee Oppa could tell Minho as he also assign in this one with me too.

“So now can you explain, why did you hide this from me? It’s been a while, right?”

“I… I didn’t mean to, it’s just I can’t imagine what will you do if you knew about this because I’ve been trying to warn you about Manager Oppa but you doesn’t seem to care-“

“That’s not the point.” He cut my words again. Like I said before, the more he did this, the angrier he is. “Don’t you know that it makes me feel like a fool? Not knowing everything to the fact that it’s related to me. And how about you, did you really find me so difficult to trust, you can’t even say it to me then I have to hear it thanks to Lee Hyung’s kindness.”

Onew is totally right about Minho. Sigh. Then I can feel that Taemin is really in an awkward situation right now, so I said to Minho, “The two of us will discuss this later.”

“Taemin should learn anyway that being a relationship isn’t just filled by rainbow and sweet words.” Minho replied my statement as then I can see from the mirror that Taemin quickly put on his earphone and just closed his eyes.

“Can we just drop this for now? I know I was wrong, but I feel sorry for Taemin because he’s here and involved in this situation.”

“Noona, you deliberately pull Onew Hyung into this too, remember?” Minho pointed out. Now I just hope that Kibum really aren’t going to tell Minho that he knew about Chuseok holiday.

Before I can say anything, Minho already speaks again, “So why is it so hard for you to tell me?”

“Look, it’s not because I didn’t trust you, Minho. It’s because-“

“Because you think I don’t care and I just being careless-“

“Can you imagine how I feel when Manager Oppa told me that? I can’t stop thinking the possibility maybe he does know and just want me to play along. Or maybe he didn’t know so he asks my help. I don’t know, Minho, tell me you can understand my feeling, when Manager Oppa literally ask me to protect you from ruining your image because of this girl you’ve been seeing, and that girl is none other than myself.”

Minho didn’t reply. Maybe what I just told him made him thinking.

“I'm sorry, you don’t know how hard it is for me, to meet you and can’t say anything. I even find it uneasy every time I saw Manager Oppa, and also Lee Oppa who actually was so nice to me too.” I said as I continue to drive.

We just sit still in silence until we reached the place. After I parked the car, I turn around and pat Taemin’s knee to wake him up although I don’t know whether he’s really sleeping or not.

“Baby…?”

He opened his eyes, so I said, “We’re here.”

As Minho opens the door, Taemin followed and walk out from the car on my sides saying, “Noona, please don’t argue again…” while he took my arm.

I fixed his hair and smile, “I'm sorry, it must be so awkward for you.”

He shook his head and then I said, “Sometimes I feel that I only give trouble to Minho. Sometimes I hope that it wasn’t me that he chose.”

A laugh coming from behind made me turn around. Of course it’s Minho’s laughter. Taemin also looked at him.

“What do you mean by that, Noona?” Minho said to me with a sarcastic tone, “You sound like you have the biggest heart by saying that, blaming yourself to be the one who caused me trouble.”

I didn’t say anything, just look at him in awe. Minho looked really annoying somehow.

“Don’t be too full of yourself I can easily make a trouble that totally unrelated to you if I want to.” He said again.

“Hyung!” Taemin exclaimed.

But then Minho frowned, I know he’s thinking about something. “Hey, but that’s a good idea. I can distract Manager Hyung’s suspicion so he won’t thinking to be curious at you.”

“What? W-wait!” I said as I released my arm from Taemin to catch up with Minho. I know he has something in mind, I just need to know what it is. If he acts carelessly, then all of this, the issue I’ve been hiding from him about Manager Oppa would be useless.

Minho kissed my cheek slightly and while he resting his hand on my shoulder, he says, “Don’t worry, you’re not chosen to be involved in this.” then after that he just opens the door and went inside the building, left me stood there dumbfounded.

That’s not all. Even though Minho said not to worry, I knew exactly that he surely going to make me feel that way. And for now, I feel that he’s drifting away as I looked at my shoulder where he patted earlier.

Taemin approached me and say, “Noona…?”

Without replying, I just looked at him and there’s a questioning look on Baby’s eyes, “What did Minho Hyung say?”

“I… I don’t know, Taeminnie. I don’t know.”

Minho, can you just forget about this?
Why can’t you make it easier for me?

With Taemin stood there looking all worried, he rubbed my arms as I just wear a short sleeves shirt during this windy day. And I can hear the sound of thunder as clouds gathered and it seems like it’s going to rain soon.

As you can see, today there’s no sun.

*************************************************************************************
heyyyy~ im back with a long chapter too :)

Tomorrow is a holiday so I can work on it faster than I thought.

I read about Taemin's ideal type; sunflower type of girl, that's why Im using it for the story. Then I watched Key's Love Chaser and cant help to squealed when I saw Taemin with the cute little puppy. I bet he's just missing his own dog, Eve.

Talking about Hello's MV, on the last chapter I wrote it based on the teaser, and as the MV came out Im glad that until the end Taemin doesnt walk out from the room so Im happy the correlation between what I wrote and what's actually happened is the same :D

Hm.. Minho surely have something in his mind, but you have to wait for the next chapter to find out what it is! :P

And about his mother, is Noona really not going to meet her in the end?

I gave you the 3 members -KeyJjongOnew- on this chapter and you can see what inside their minds, I hope it pays the lack of their presence on previous chapters..

Thanks for all the comments and I hope for all the silent readers, you can drop something so I can understand what you think after you read my story too :)

lovelovelove,

z.