Jaejoong couldn’t believe his eyes as he watched Danmi smiled widely and waved her hand. There she was standing in front of him getting mugged from the hugs of his friends. She gave them her sweetest smile hugging each one of them. He hasn’t seen her in years and she changed so much that he could barely recognize her at all.

Her used to be waist long and black hair, now only reaches her mid back and was now coloured brunette. He didn’t know if it was because of the high heels she was wearing but she got taller too. Jaejoong couldn’t put it into other words anymore but her face, her body, surely it doesn’t belong to someone in high school. Seo Danmi is no teenager anymore.

“Oppa who is she?”

“I’m his wife.” After giving out hugs, her friendly smile turned into a murderous one. She stated crossing her arms on her chest staring down at the girl like she’s some pest. Maybe her appearance wasn’t the only thing that changed.

“Is that true?” the girl looked at him and Jaejoong nodded, his eyes not leaving the lady in front of him. Maybe I’m dreaming?

“And I would appreciate it a lot if you would find another lap to sit on. You can sit on him” he pointed to Yoochun “He’d be more than happy to screw you.” Their mouths suddenly ran dry. They were surprised to see her there but was even shocking was that she was far from the reserved and passive Danmi before.

The girl visibly stiffened. Not wanting any more unnecessary scenario she stood up bowed lightly and headed for the door.

“It’s been a long time Jaejoong.” Danmi greeted giving him a hug and a kiss on the check. Jaejoong was even more puzzled now more than ever. “It’s really good to see you guys.” Her smiling face came back like she wasn’t even raising her eyebrows at the first place.

“When did you come?” Junsu asked slinging his arms around her shoulders. Leave it to the dolphin to relieve the tension in any kind of situation.

“Just this afternoon. I left my luggage at the house. Then went here” she explained smiling.

“Our house?”

“Yeah, you were” her eye brows rose as if finding the right words to say. “uhhm preoccupied if I can call it that. So I didn’t wake you up and left.”

Jaejoong’s face whitened like a ghost. She saw him in bed with some girl and didn’t do anything. That even scared him more. It would have been better if she what Jaejoong? It would be better if what? A voice inside him asked.

Jaejoong’s eyes never left her even for a second as she catch up with his friend. He just stood a few step afar, staring and observing her every move. The way she talks and moves is also different now. The Danmi he used to know was timid and reserved with little words but the girl in front of him was different. She was bubbly but still full of grace. Relaxed but still sophisticated. Playful but still poised. Liberated and blunt but still polite. She changed so much that he doesn’t know her anymore. Did he even know her in the first place?

As soon as they got home Danmi sat herself on the couch and stretched her leg. “Ahh, it’s good to be back.” Remembering the familiar stranger Jiji immediately jumped on her lap. “ommo, it’s Jiji. You’ve grown so much. Do you still remember me?” Jiji purred being pet by his mistress, happy that someone would be paying him attention again.

Jaejoong watched Danmi and the desperately needing affection Jiji. Truth be told that he planned on ditching Jiji a few times but he reason out that he was too busy to do so. Silence filled the air as it was just only the two of them. Jaejoong’s used to the silence. Actually that’s one of the reasons why he prefers leaving alone. But this stillness of the both of them wasn’t to his liking. “I’m gonna change my clothes” he announced and headed for his room.

“Me coming back.” His hands froze on the door knob. “Is it alright?” slowly Jaejoong turned and she was just right in front of him. She wasn’t on the couch anymore and Jiji is now nowhere to be seen. “Are you okay with me being here?” she looked at him expectantly and he couldn’t help but answer her truthfully.

Leaning on the door Jaejoong stared at her with a blank expression on. Moments have passed and he kept his mouth shut. Danmi felt like she melting under his gaze and that a puddle was already forming on her feet but she didn’t quiver.

“Honestly, I don’t know.” Jaejoong pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes like he’s having a major migraine coming on. “I don’t know why you suddenly showed up. I don’t know why suddenly you’re standing here right in front of me. I don’t know what to think. I don’t know how things will change now that you’re back.” He took a deep breath and returned his stern gaze on her. “I don’t think I even know why you left in the first place.”

He waited for her answer, for her explanation that he’s desperate to hear for so long but to his surprise Danmi chuckled. “Jaejoong ah, you think too much.” She crossed her arms over her chest. “Don’t make things complicated. I left and now I’m back; as simple as that. And about the change you’re talking about, we’ll see how things will go. Why don’t we start being friends?”

“Friends?”

Danmi nodded “yeah, friends. Friends who don’t fight like kids. Friends who don’t hate each other. Friends who feel comfortable with the other and friends who got each other’s back.” She held out her hand for a handshake. “Forget the past, what do you say?”

He stared at her hand puzzled at her action. Reluctantly as if still hesitating, Jaejoong took her stretched hand and shook like meeting someone for the first time.

Why did she come back? That was the first thought that ran through his head the moment his doors shut.  Why did she suddenly pop up like a mushroom and turn things upside down. Well, his world upside down. What you expect that she’d stay away from you forever? They’re married so her coming back to this life would eventually happen. But why now? or why only now? Did he miss her? Yeah right.  

Over the years you could say he matured. He doesn’t blame her anymore and instead accepts the fact that things happened the way they happened and they already happened so there’s no use moping around the past. “Forget the past and keep moving forward” he repeated the quotation from the recent Disney movie he watched. (jiji insisted to watch, he reasoned)

But what’s gonna happen now that she’s back. What’s her intention of coming back? Does she want revenge? It’s Danmi she’s not like that. Is she? All sorts of thoughts ran through his mind, trying to reason the things she did and would eventually do but the truth is he’s scared. It’s weird to be scared and so unmanly but that’s what he’s honestly feeling right now. He knows he’s being all cool about the past and saying he moved on and everything but inside he’s still scared. Scared that somehow the past might repeat itself. If he experienced that kind of pain again he might be push over the edge and have a mental breakdown. His façade may look like his strong but his friends knew that it took him years to move on.

Did she come back so they could start a new? Does she want to be with him? Does she want to claim that she’s his wife? Does she want to start a family now? If that’s what she wants can he give it to him? Is she still hoping that he would love her? Is it possible to love her?

“Friends! She said friends Jaejoong!” He muttered to himself burying his head on the pillow. After his lungs called an SOS he hugged the pillow and stared at the ceiling. No, that can’t be she hates him. After all the things he did to her before, of course she hates him. But it doesn’t look like she hates him. She smiles at him, greeted him and even hugged him when earlier. People don’t do that to the person they hate, right? But why doesn’t she hate him? Why wouldn’t she? He did lots of awful things to her. And he hated her unreasonably. He’s being childish and a jerk so he just pointed his fingers on her. Maybe she did hate him. He would hate him if he was on her shoes.

If it was before he’s sure that she wouldn’t hate him no matter what he does. But she changed. She changed so much that she was foreign to him. She used to be cool before. She used to walk with confidence and arrogance but now she walked with confidence and sophistication. She matured in more ways than one. Her hair is shorter. Her eyes glittered like she hid stars behind them. Her smiles make people not want to take their eyes off her. Even the way she stands is just intimidating. The V-neck fitted dress she wore just proves she’s not 17 anymore. He doesn’t know her anymore and the thought scared him.

Was he lusting for her now? Well is that wrong? He’s a guy, its natural. Have you seen her? If you did, you would think there’s something wrong if he didn’t lust for her and beside they’re married. “Arrggh” he grunted hugging his pillow tighter. And he’s back to that side of the argument again. He’s an only son, an only child so producing an heir is mandatory. His parents would make sure of that, maybe his mother was even the person behind all of these. She’s getting impatient to have a grandchild, but that doesn’t matter anymore. Of course he also want to have children that’s a given, but ‘make babies’ still a bit pretty far down his to do list. He’s only 22 after all. But if he’s ever going to make babies with somebody that would be Danmi. She deserves at least that. Maybe he can’t grow to love her. Maybe he can’t give her his heart but she deserves a family. She deserves a happy family, that’s certain.

She’s an orphan he remembered. He bets she wants a big family. Maybe that’s why she came back now, so they could start early. Jaejoong chuckled on the way he thinks. He’s already at this state but his brain keeps turning green every now and then, can’t help it. So many things to consider, so many things to think of but his brain cells are worn out. A few more thinking and they would die, that’s not just good for the company and his wellbeing. So he decided to stop thinking and sleep, letting things take their flow or think about it some other time. But right now he needs sleep.

 (^+^)(^0^)(^+^)

It was Sunday and Jaejoong was busy making their lunch when their doorbell rang. The bell rang a few more times than a sane person would push the button. Already having a hitch of who his intruders are, Jaejoong checked on the monitor before opening the door.

“What took you so long?” Jung Yunho doesn’t like waiting at all.

Removing his shoes Changmin looked up “Where’s Danmi?”

“She’s still sleeping.” Jaejoong answered. Almost immediately Junsu dashed and disappear to her room.

A few seconds later Junsu came back with a tomato red face still with no Danmi tailing behind. “You didn’t wake her up?” Changmin asked.

“Uhhhm, she was still sleeping so I didn’t wake her up.” Junsu scratched the back of his head.

“Must be jet lag.”  Being a regular traveller Yunho himself was used to jet lag.

“Why’s you face so red?” Yoochun asked.

“I didn’t see anything!” Junsu shouted defensively with hands crossed over his body protectively. The others stopped and stared at him. “It wasn’t my fault she was wea---, I mean I swear I didn’t see anything!”

Yoochun and Changmin started laughing and teasing Junsu asking what did he see? Yunho on the other hand averted his eyes and played with his seat.

“Oouch!” Junsu rubbed the back of his head. “hyung!”

Jaejoong glared at the younger as if challenging to hit him back. “What?”

“Aissh!” Junsu rubbed his head more in frustration seeing there’s no way his oldest hyung’s letting him off.

“So noisy guys.” Danmi suddenly appeared dressed in a somewhat see through nightie and short shorts. Everyone’s mouth went down. Yawning with half closed eyes “what?” realizing what the fuzz is about. “Seriously? You guys look like high school students now, very disappointing.” She muttered shaking her head side to side. So what’s for breakfast?” she chirped smiling. She wasn’t even bothered that five men are staring at her half ness. She walked to the kitchen laughing at them. What the heck did Tokyo, L.A and France do to her?

But the older heard none of it as he pushes a laughing Danmi back to her room. “Change”

After changing to a more acceptable length of shorts and an oversized shirt Danmi sat at the couch. Jaejoong noticing Junsu’s smiling, gave the younger another disciplinary tap on the head. “HYUNG!!!”

 “Jaejoong stop hitting your friends!” Danmi warned patting Junsu’s head who ran to her side after getting hit. “Does it hurt?” Junsu nodded and continued to get comfortable of Danmi’s patting.

The other’s chuckled on how things turned out irritating Jaejoong even more “What are you guys even doing here?”

“We’re here to claim the things Danmi bought us when she’s away” Yunho stated. Rich or not they love treats.

A few minutes later the living room was full of Danmi’s luggage. “Here’s some chocolate. Just grab whatever you want. Oh and here’s the perfume I bought in Paris.” She said sitting on the floor as she handed them out.

“Wow, you bought a lot of stuff.” Changmin commented already started eating his chocolates.

“I go shopping whenever I feel lonely or stressed so things just piled up” hearing that made Jaejoong feel a bit guilty. If it weren’t for him she wouldn’t have felt those kinds of things. Jaejoong let go. She’s back now no used of thinking of that.

“How was Japan?” Yunho asked.

“Lots of shrines, speaking of which I got you all something.” Jumping to another bag and rummaging, seconds later she finally found what she’s looking for. “These are for good health and luck.” She handed each of them modestly designed bracelets with their names on it. “You don’t have to wear it but keep it at least. I got injured climbing a hill just to pray for those.”

Jaejoong’s eyes widened “You did?”

She nodded “I went with a few friends. It was raining a bit and I slipped.”

“It seems like you had lots of fun.” Yoochun commented smelling the perfume she bought.

“Yeah, being away lets you see the world in a new perspective” she chided. It’s true, though she’s a very independent person even before, it’s different when you are alone. Alone, no friends, no family, no idea where the nearest toilet is. She managed though. Her brothers and sisters would visit her from time to time. But when she gets really lonely she visits them instead. But more or less she got used to it. Maybe that’s why she jumped from once place to another. She got addicted to meeting new people, seeing places she haven’t been before, doing things she told she would never be able to or allowed to. She felt free as a bird, doing things she wants, the way she wanted and when she wanted. Nobody pointed fingers, nobody reprimanded and nobody would ask why.

But when her mother-in-law called she was more than happy to pack her bags. Like stones were lifted from her chess. Years have passed and she’s been through a lot. She left just like he asked her to. That night was just her breaking point. He shouted in her face that he hates her and wanted her out of his life. Imagine how painful that is hearing from the person you tried so hard to be important to. She doesn’t want to leave at first but she can’t take it anymore.

She didn’t give up, she just took a break. And it’s the best for the both of them.  It hurts seeing him being so miserable. He blamed her, so she blamed herself. ‘It’s not her fault’ she kept repeating in her head. But just one word from him, with every shot glass he drinks, with every sarcastic remark he would throw at her, made her fingers point at herself. That’s not good for her. The armour she built around her heart over the years is slowly crumbling down. Her pride won’t allow her to stoop that low. If her prince charming in a white horse ain’t coming, then she just has to save herself.

And just what she was asked, she left. It did him good, it did her great. The half way around the world space between them made her realize a few things. She gave herself a mental slap and wakes herself up. Even that, she learned on her own. The Danmi who got bullied by him and was blamed for everything wasn’t her. She doesn’t let people step and trample all over her. She just doesn’t take crap from people. She lost herself when she met him. But now she found herself, you could say.

She doesn’t hate him. It was nobody’s fault. Destiny was just being playful on them, she believes. She only realized that she wanted to go home when her mother in law called for her. Home, even if it’s still questionable to her whether she really could call it that. She intends to make this her home. What’s gonna to happen to the two of them? She has no idea. Is she planning on winning his heart? Honestly? Truthfully? No. She tried that before, it didn’t work. People got hurt, hearts broke into pieces, and she even lost herself. She’s not that stupid to try again. She doesn’t even want to try; her efforts might just go down the drain again.

Yeah right. Deep inside she knew she’s still hoping to get her own happily ever after or something anywhere near that. She just wants to be important to him just the way he’s important to her. But why is it so hard? Is it really that hard to love her? She knows love isn’t something you could put logic into but still, why? It’s not like she’s a bad person. It’s not like she didn’t try. She did her best so he could see her as a woman. Perhaps that’s why she got hurt. She tried so hard and failed and that wounded her pride.

When she was adopted she didn’t even try to win her adopted parents affection because she knew why they adopted her in the first place. And they have a child with their own flesh and blood, there’s no reason for them to even glance at her. She didn’t try so she didn’t get disappointed when they only saw her as an income generating asset. Reality gave her a clear picture because the day she stepped in the Seo’s mansion she already said to herself, she doesn’t have a place in this household.

For the family she always dreamed of, she tried so hard. But that made her realized the person she is, and the person she’s not. She’s not loved. And no matter how hard she tries, no matter how much of herself she gives, she just won’t be loved.

Sorry guys I can't reply to you comments like I used to. =) But hey, I updated that makes up for it right. I wasn't able to proof read this and just posted it so I apologize for the gramatical mistakes and please do correct me because I want to improve my english. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this chapter ans DON'T FORGET TO COMMENT AND THUMBS UP if you haven't. Let me guys know what you think. I love long and randon comments!!! oh and before I forgot ---- WELCOME NEW SUBSCRIBERS!!!!!!!!