As soon as I step out of the studio, I sigh in relief. That session was torture! Being in a room with him again, pretending as if nothing happens and act tough is hard for my fragile soul. I successfully drive him away so that I can breath properly during the editing. With him next to me, my heart never seems to listen to my head.

I think my decision of being cold towards him is the best decision I’ve made since my move to Seoul. I can’t let myself fall for him. I know I can’t lie to myself, but I have to try my best to stop my heart from loving this man. Being cold will drive him away, he’ll get annoyed, and then, the relationship will be purely professional. But….

“Cheryl-ah, you are amazing” his sentence is still ringing beautifully in my ear. The moment we were face-to-face, I think my heart almost blows up. My body and my soul welcome the proximity between us that usually makes me uncomfortable. I could stay in that position for days and wont get tired. His sincere eyes make me want to trust him with my life. His full lower lips makes me want to bite it and have a taste. His overall charm, simply beyond what any woman can bear.

My phone vibrates and JongHoon oppa’s name comes up.

From: Jong Hoon

Yo wait up in the entrance ok?

I smile. We exchanged numbers when 2ne1 was practicing their solo parts and he accompanies me whenever the dancers are not needed in the practice. We found out that we are two years apart, so I decided to call him oppa. And like other YG kids, he too is affected my western music and his English is quiet good. He promised me that he’d try his best to speak to me in English, only if I reply in Korean. He is the perfect practice partner.

Reply To: Jong Hoon

Arrasso oppa ^ ^ bbaliwa!

We walk to a small Italian cafe to enjoy the beautiful weather. The sun is shining bright but the wind is nice and chilly. We sit outside so that JongHoon oppa can smoke and I, too, want to soak myself in the sun more. As we wait for our meal, our conversations become more personal.

“Hows Korea for you so far?” he asks, puffing away his first cigarettes. 

“Been pretty good… the weather is great, the food is amazing and the people has been really nice to me too” I answers honestly.

“How about that guy you told me? Still mad at him?” he says. I told him about how I was ditched on Saturday but I censor the name and the place so no scandals can be make.

“I try to not think about it. Its hard though. He constantly pops in my head” I sigh.

“woooo…. Do you just fell in love with a Korean dude??” He teases me. I blushed, not knowing what to say.

“Wait, really?? You fall in love??” He seems shock seeing my blushed cheeks.

“I don’t know, oppa. I can’t stop thinking about him, but I know he’s bad news. Its like in those thriller movies, you know something scary is inside but you cant stop yourself from going in the house!” For some reason, I tend to tell him my personal stories rather too easily. His wit and friendly charms warms me.

“Hahaha… nice analogy! Why is he bad news, anyway?” I think he is intrigued by my story.

“He is an ” I say with a straight face and instantly, JongHoon oppa blast out laughing, making everyone stare at us.

“You really know how describe people, eh?” he says, between his giggle.

“I’m serious! Did you forget what he did to me on Saturday?? Oh and I forgot to tell you! Later that evening, I went out to a club to meet my friend, BUT that was there too, having a from a !” I am full of resurfaced anger.

“WHAT?! So he lied to you about being busy? Geez, an indeed!” he finally agrees.

“Yeah… but he chased me up to apologize afterwards” I cant hide my confused feelings. For unknown reason, I don't like hearing JongHoon oppa calls GD an , even though I call him that. I don't like the sound of other people talking about GD, I don't know why.

“Well, its clear that he’s a douche but its also clear that you can't stop thinking about him, so what’s your plan?” he sounds serious.

“Being a to him” my answer makes JongHoon oppa laughing crazily again.

“Awesome then, please tell me later how that goes for you” he chuckles and the waiter comes to our table to put down our fettuccini.

We chat about trivial matter as we finishing our pasta. I don't want to talk about that arrogant fool while I'm eating because i would lose my appetite. JongHoon oppa tells me stories about the YG company and any gossip in it. Being a YG dancer for almost 5 years does give you some behind the scene scoop. JongHoon oppa has the most adorable humor. He basically cracks up at everything! I enjoy his company so much that I forget the time.

“! We have to go! I got practice in 10 minutes!” he jumps up from his chair after checking the time on his phone. He quickly pulls out few bills and left it on the table. I haven't fully finish my mushroom fettuccini but he grabs my arm and we bolted out of the restaurant in a wink.

I arrived back in the studio and find it empty. I guess GD goes out to have lunch too. I lounge myself in the sofa as I stretch my legs. JongHoon oppa made me run so suddenly that I sprained my ankle. He apologizes but he couldn’t do anything since he got his practice but I assured him that I am fine so he won't have any guilty conscience.

All of a sudden, GD’s opened bag that he put next to the sofa caught my eyes.

I don’t usually go around people’s belongings but there is one thing that particularly interests me. It looks like an old and very well used notebook. It’s black leather cover is pretty worn out. Is it a book where GD put his ideas on? Oh God if it is, I want to peek!

After making sure that no one is around, I brave myself to grab the book from inside his bag slowly, to make sure that i dont distrub anything else in the bag. I look like one of those spy try to gather secret information.

The book doesn’t seem old, but it sure as hell has been through a lot. Maybe he brings this book everywhere he goes that it got worn out. I open the page and my heart beat stops.

Written on the pages are lyrics, quotes, quotes and some random drawing. Some words are scratched out, while some words are bolded. I stop in the page where it says COFFEE CAFE. The rough lyric to one of my favorite songs is penned down on this paper that I am holding and I can feel my hand quivers. Some extra notes is on every verse, stating which part is which. He even wrote down different tones to match each part. My VIP mind is shaken. I am holding the holy book of BigBang’s songs!

I look through the book until I reach the last page that he wrote on. This must be his latest scribbling! The title is PARAN. Or Blue, in English.

The winter has gone, and the spring has come
My heart has withered We have withered
And my our heart is bruised from missing you from longing

I am used to the blue tears now, used to the blue sorrow
The love that I’ve sent away with the wind floating clouds

Under the same sky, at different places
Because you and I cant be together are dangerous
I have to leave you I am leaving you
Gone the sweet sound of oppa One letter difference from ‘nim’^
It’s cowardly but i’m hiding because I cant be with you i’m not good enough

Unknowingly, my face is already drenching in my own tears. The lyric is heart wrenchingly beautiful. The words are full of emotion, I can’t imagine if he actually makes this song.

I re-read the words over and over again. ‘The winter has gone, and the spring has come’ Such a beautiful phrase. He must’ve written this not too long ago. How can he come up with phrases like this?! The spring breeze, maybe that's where he got his inspiration. ‘Under the same sky, at different places, because you and I are dangerous’ This phrase sums up my feelings towards him. How can he wrap it so beautifully?? I marvel at his brilliance when suddenly, the door opens, and comes in the owner of the book.

He caught me holding on to his book, lounging on the sofa, while sobbing. This must be a really ugly sight for him.

“YA!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!” he grabs his book from my hands and quickly putting it back in his bag. I can see that his ears are becoming red.

“I just took a peek. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude” I apologize as I wipe away my tears.

He sighs. “Fine. Next time don’t do it”

“The lyrics to Paran. Its beautiful, oppa” I can’t help but calling him that. He feels like a real senior to me now.

“ you read that?!!” his face ashen as his eyes widen in disbelief.

“Yes. Nothing is wrong with it. Why?” his overly nervousness confuses me.

“A-a-anniyo. It’s just some random scrabble I did. No meanings to it what so ever” he seems uneasy.

“Why are you crying?” he notices the traces of tears on my cheek.

“I read Paran. I can relate to it. I told you, the lyrics is outstanding” I praise him.

“You cried because of that?!” he seems more shock now. I nod.

“You can relate to it??” he is still in disbelief.

“I think a lot of people can, oppa. It will be a beautiful song.” I can’t help myself. My complements are pouring for him.

“Aish jjinja… I didn’t think about that when I wrote it. Gomawo” he blushes now, not knowing what to do. What is this? Is this a new side of Kwon Ji Yong that I haven’t seen? A shy Kwon Ji Yong? I never thought its possible.

“What’s wrong with your hand?” I notice fresh bruises on his knuckles.

“Ah its nothing” he tries to cover it with his sleeve. “I’ve finish with the parts, you can do the editing now” he seems to try to change the subject.

I got up and get to the mixer to start my editing. Weirdly enough, instead of following me like a true possessive person, he lounge himself on the sofa, taking my place.

“You’re not monitoring me?” I ask, seeing him closing his eyes like he’s preparing for a sleep.

“Anni. You did a great job before, I trust you. I don’t think you’ll be comfortable working with me hovering around you” he says, still closing his eyes.

“So you are going to sleep instead?” Couple of hours ago, he was like a possessed freak with his song, but now he lets me do it freely?

“No. I’m preserving the serenity” He answers. No wonder he’s a hit maker, even on daily conversation like this, he makes it poetic.

I listen to the song and I smile. I didn’t notice the lyrics of the song that I edited few hours ago, because I was busy settling my heart. But after I read the holy book, I seem to notice the lyrics more. This song, it’s fun!

The hook is “jaemieobseo” repeated 4 times and it’s damn catchy. I can’t help but moving my head to fill the beat that covers this song. GD’s high-pitched tone fits perfectly.

As I put some adjustment to the music, I can’t help but think how lucky I am to be here. I am just recently graduated from university, and I got a job straight away. Not only that, my job is what I have been dreaming about since I chose my university course. To add, my company is the one that debuted a group that I recently become obsessed with. Now, here I am, only months after my graduation, sitting in this luxurious studio, working with one of my idol.

It only took me around 30 minutes to finish putting my touches. The instruments are very dominating and I only need to put some enhancements here and there to make it perfect. I turn to GD in his sofa and caught him watching me like a hawk.

“Are you that uncomfortable with people working on your song without you assisting?” I protest.

“No. I like watching you work. You giggle every now and then. It sounds nice” His eyes are warm, full of adoration.

“Did I? I didn’t notice” I blush. “Well, the song is done. It’s a great song, by the way. Ain’t no fun, eh?”

“Hahaha.. Yeah, we came up with it when we were dead tired in between schedules and the members were complaining how bored they are of answering the same interview questions” He says while making his way to stand next to me.

“We? I thought you write it”

“I wrote the lyrics, but it was SeungRi’s idea. We laughed at him when he said it but after it sinks it, I decided to write it” he says while checking at what I have done to the song and turn it on high in speaker 4 and 5.

“This is great! As always” he says, smiling to me, making me blush again.

“I notice in all the songs that I’ve work on, there’s always a part missing its lyrics. Is it for T.O.P-ssi?” I was weirded out by these missing lyrics in every song at first, by as soon as I remember that TOP writes his own rap, I slowly get it.

“Yeah, he likes to make his rap just moments before recording. More spontaneous he says. And don’t call hip T.O.P please. Its weird. I feel like in an interview” he answers while busy saving the songs in different format.

“Why? I call you GD, same thing” I play stupid.

“YA! I told you to call me JiYong oppa and you did! Why change it to GD again now!” he protests and pouts. Oh damn, how cute is this man.

“Because I feel like you’re more GD than you are Ji Yong oppa sometimes. GD is the arrogant, annoying, high-horsed idol, where as Ji Yong oppa is the nice, comforting friend.” I say, making him widen his eyes for the n-th time today.

“What?! So I am GD now? The arrogant idol??” he doesn’t seem to be able to believe his own ears.

“Hahaha… Well, you did introduce yourself as GD when we first met, right? So don’t blame me, GD-ssi” I like annoying him. He looks cute pouting his lips like this.

“That’s because I was nervous when I met you” he mumbles, barely audible.

“What?” I try to make sense of what he says.

“Nothing.” He blushes and looks back to the screen to take out another song that needs to have some adjustment.

Just as we are listening to the song, the door opens. Its YoungBae oppa. His face is fresh, sun-soaked, with a huge grin accross his face. I can see his cheeks are slightly blushed. His grin widen when he saw me.

“Yo” he says to GD and GD only replies with a weak nod.

“You guys are not that busy right? I borrow Cheryl then” he says, grinning and grabbing my bag in one hand and my wrist in the other and tug me out of the studio in one swift motion that shocks both me and GD. What’s going on here?!

“YAA!!!” I can hear GD shouted at us as YoungBae oppa drag me to the lift.

Another update! :) I hope you guys like it! This is what happens when I can enjoy my W.E.E.K.E.N.D and theres no job to be done!

I really appreciate you guys reading this story, but i would LOVE to have more comments to read :)

Anyway, I still don't know what pairing i'm going to make, i'm just writing this as it goes. So opinions, suggestions, and critics are welcome!

P.S: add me up as friends too if you want! I am a completely nice girl that loves to chat! ^ ^