AN: Hi guys~ Yep, I decided to update today, cause that cliffie was a bit evil^^ I am sorta thinking about changing the title cause it's so... I don't know xDDD Or at least I'll make it grammatically correct.. Yes, that's what happens when I think of stories at night... xDD

Please, just cause I'm not leaving a cliffie, comment if you like this..*puppy eyes* Reading the comments always make me smile (and almost cry, but that's another thing) they really mean a lot to me <3 And no, I'm not just saying this.. :D

'Could you please tell me why you'd been avoiding us?' Jonghyun asked me, his hand still on my shoulder. Tears gathered in my eyes as I looked at him. His eyes were watery as well... I took a shaky breath and tried to control my emotions. No, I couldn't tell him.

'Okay, seriously, stop this. I don't know who the you're talking about, but I am not that person. So off!' I told him, trying to blink my tears away. Even though I wanted my voice to be sharp and loud, it came out in a soft whisper. His eyes widened, but I knew that this time, he wasn't going to leave me,

'I am not buying this. The same person, the same looks, only a lot skinnier and a different hair color, the same voice. Your style might be different, but it's not enough to fool me... Even your house is the same. If you found other people who you think deserve you more, just tell me, and I won't bother you anymore.'He said, looking into my eyes. I knew that he could see the tears in them.

My mother's voice flashed in my mind. She told me that I should tell them. Minho too.. What if they were right? I knew that I would hurt Jonghyun if I didn't tell him the truth, but at least he wouldn't care when I died. But in a way, he already knew who I was. There was no use of keeping up my facade now. My knees gave out under me and I started falling, but he caught me.

'You're right..'I whispered weakly as I looked into his eyes, trying to steady myself. He let me go slowly. 'It's really me...'I continued. 'But if you... want to know... We should go inside.' I added softly. He nodded silently.

We walked into the house and after getting of our shoes, we walked into the living room. I sat on the couch and he sat next to me.

'I don't understand why you'd act like this..'he said. I looked away and sighed. 'If you fell in love with someone else, or anything, you should just tell me, I'd understand...'he said.

'NO!' I screamed, surprising both of us. 'It has nothing to do with that. I still love you.'I added softly. 'But... look, do you remember the time when I fainted in school... You know, a few years ago?' I asked him shakily. He nodded, his eyes full of confusion.

'Yes, of course. That day was really scary. I seriously thought that I'd lost you.'he said and frowned at the memory.'But what does it have to do with all that's happening right now?' he asked.

'I was diagnosed with a very rare, but serious disease. It seems like I've had it since I was born.' I told him. His eyes widened and he stared at me.

'You are kidding, right?'he asked me. I shook my head with a bitter smile.

'No, I'm not.. I just couldn't tell you... At first it seemed like I'd get better soon... I moved away because the hospital could treat me better. But lately my results have been getting worse and worse..'

'You are lying!' he yelled loudly. 'You found someone and only came back to show it off!' I shook my head.

'No, Jonghyun. I would never do it to you. I still love you, maybe even more.'I whispered and slowly, I reached out to take his hand. 'I wanted you to forget me.. Do you know how hard it was to read your messages? Every day, I would press reply and type my reply, but I would delete it.'

'Why?' he asked me softly. 'You're just a bit ill.. You'll be better soon.. You shouldn't have ignored us just for that.' he said and smiled at me weakly.

'Jonghyun, you don't understand it. I won't get better.. I'm dying...'I whispered. His eyes widened once again.

'No..'he whispered. 'No, you're not. You're alright... You just want to push me away.'he said, raising his voice.

'No, I'm not lying.'I whispered, tears streaming down my face.'I wish I was...' For a few minutes, he sat there, staring at me. His eyes were emotionless, and I could barely see him move. He was starting to scare me.. I reached out to touch his face, but the next moment, I was pulled into his arms. He wrapped them around me, and his hold was almost painful. I wrapped my arms around his neck and clung to him, still crying. He laid his head on mine, and I knew that he was crying too. Now I had to convince him to leave. Because if he didn't, it would only hurt him more. I opened my mouth to speak, but no sound came out. Before I could have tried to speak again, he silenced me with a kiss. The kiss was different from the ones we had before. It was needy, passionate. It showed me how much he missed me, and finally I could show him that I missed him too. That I loved him. There was another new thing to our kiss. It was salty because we were still crying. After a few minutes, he pulled away.

'I should have known,'he whispered. 'you are so tiny and pale... Maybe I could have helped you...'he started rocking us back and forth, still holding me tightly. I realized that I couldn't push him away. If I did, I would just make everything worse.

'You couldn't have known.'I sniffed.

'It's going to be alright..'he whispered into my ear.' You'll get better...' he repeated over and over, until even I believed it.

'I'm sorry..'I whispered suddenly. I realized that what I've been doing wasn't what I should have. I should have told him and be with him as much as I could. I knew that my days were numbered... I think he knew it too.

'It's alright now..'he said as he started rubbing my back in circles.' You should have told me, but now I know. And whatever happens, I'll be here with you, alright? And Minnie too.. Tomorrow you're going to tell him..'he said and I nodded numbly. He was right, I had to tell Taemin too,

'He knows that I'm sick.'I whispered softly.' I told him when it seemed like it wasn't too bad.. He wouldn't leave me alone until I told him why I'd lost a lot of weight..'I giggled. 'But I don't want him to know that I'm... you know..'I mumbled softly.

'You have to. Sweetie, if you don't, and... something happens, it will be much worse. From now on, we will spend all of out free time together, alright?' he asked me. I nodded shakily. He smiled, though it wasn't a happy smile. It was a sad smile, because he knew that I would be leaving him soon. I laid my head on his chest and smiled faintly.

'Sounds like a good idea..'I mumbled into his chest.' Are.. are you sure that you can... live with me... like this? What if I'll be hospitalized soon? Or what if I die in a few days?' I asked him doubtfully. Deep down, a small part of me still wanted him to leave me willingly, so he wouldn't suffer because of me. I didn't want to see him suffer anymore, I loved him too much.

'Don't speak like this.. I can promise you, that you are going to be alright. And if something happens, I'll be there to hold your hand. I've always loved you, and I will never be able to stay away from you, especially since you are here in my arms right now... I love you too much for that..'he whispered.

'I love you too..'I mumbled and stifled a yawn. And yes, even though almost nothing had happened to me that day, I was already extremely tired..

'Sleep..'Jonghyun chuckled, his voice a bit hoarse. I nodded slightly and closed my eyes, letting sleep take over..

  Okay, I actually think that this chapter was a huge fail.. Dunno why, but whatever I tried didn't work out T.T Sorry for that guys T.T