Chapter 15

I felt I need to cry. I want to cry so hard I don't know why Kris running from me. Why he say words to me and then he run away without finishing. What he trying to say?

I cannot just sit there so I get out the bed and decide look for Kris. I won't cry since I don't know what he try to say. SO i get out the bed and put my shoes on and go out the room. I walking down the hall looking for Kris. The hotel we have 4 rooms: me and Kris, chen and xiumin, lay and luhan, and hen the manager. 3 of the rooms are on same side the hall as us but lay and luhan is around the corner toward the elvator.

I walk to the elevator because maybe he left the building. I go there and turn the corner but I not ready for what I see! It like the wind is knock out of me! I just freeze on the spot!!!

In front of Luhan and Lay dor is Kris! Luhan back is on the door and Kris is leaning toward him, his arm propped over luhan head! It look... intimate!!!

W,wahhhhh, my mouth open to cry but nothing come out and I don't disturb them. I close my eyes as huge tear drop come and I turn and run the otherway before they see me!

What happening there? I don't even want to think about it. Those words Kris saying in the room... there is a person he think about always, that he value and want to protect, and just being near them bring peace... Aigoo i so stupid! I am such pabo to think it could be me. I hoping Kris like me but no! He like Luhan!

I crying so much now my tears falling so much I can't see where I going. I walk back to my room I share with Kris but somehow, it like my feet guide me because I end up at another door. I collapse in front of it weeping. Did I knock? Maybe i did because then it open and I fall completely to the floor.

"Tao!" I hear Chen shock voice and then  I feel te comforting arm of Xiumin around my shoulders.

"What happened?" he asked.

I shake my head and keep crying.

"What you doing here? Where Kris?" Xiumin ask.

I keep shaking my head and crying. I can't speak.

"Maybe I should get Kris..." Chen said.

"No!" I finally say, gulping air from crying. "Please... don't..."

"Do you want us take to you room?" Chen said.

"I shake my head."

"What you want?" Chen ask.

"I want to staying here... with my Baozi hyung," I say.

That all I need to say because then Xiumin take charge the situation. He pretty strong even if he is short. He scoop me up and carry me to the bed. He put me down on the bed and Chen close the door and follow us in.

"Is Kris in the room still?" Chen ask.

I shake my head and Xiumin pull back the blanket and put me in. I blush even though I still crying because he being so tender.

"Chen, why don't you stay in Tao and Kris room tonight. I'll see what bothering him..."

Chen look skepticle but I guess he know I not gonna stop crying soon and maybe Xiumin only one can help so he leave. When Chen is gone Xiumin make a tea at the hotel and I lay there sniffling in pillow.

I feel so stupid I crying so hard over Kris but my boyfriend is Xiumin. And he is trying to comforting me. Can I tell him why I crying? How will he feel to know I crying because Kris.

Xiumin come back with tea and help me sit up. He wipe my tear with a towel and then hand me the cup.

"Drink this you feel better," he said.

I wordlessly taking the cup and I sip it because it hot. He then get in the bed beside me. It feel nice and warm being in bed beside him. And it not nervous like when I with Kris.

Aigoo i thinking to Kris again. Always my mind on Kris even though he already rip my heart out. I let out shaky breath as I feel the tears about to come again. I remember the picture of Kris and Luhan in the hall and I thinking I want to die.

Xiumin take the cup from my hand and set it on table beside bed.

"What happen?" he ask.

I shake my head.

"Is it Kris?" he ask.

I hesistate, shake my head and say, "I can't tell you."

"Why not?"

"I don't want to hurting you," i quiver.

"You already hurting me," Xiumin say, his body even closer now and he rub my back. "Because when you so sad it make me wanna cry..."

His words it break my heart I just feel so bad! I feel bad because Kris break my heart but also bad because Xiumin feel bad to see me cry!

"It not your fault!" I say.

"I still want to help!"

"Why?" I ask.

"Because I care about you!" he said.

I put my face in my hands and sob and he hug me tight.

"Why you so nice to me! Why you keep trying for me when you know how I feel!" I say.

"Did something happen between you and him?" he ask. "In the room..."

I shake my head, "Nothing happened. He left... he left the room. Nothing happen..."

"Then why you saying these things...?" he ask, concerned.

I shake my head and wipe my tears again, "I just want to know why you feel the way you do... make me understand."

He touch my hands and then turn my head so it looking at him. His gaze so intense and full of emotion. He pause and then begin in a beautiful mix of korean and chinese.

"Tao never doubt the intensity my feeling toward you. From day one I feel drawn to you. Even our language get between us I think even with body language I fall for your charm. From the moment you mistake call me oppa to now I will never not see you! My previous dongsaeng, my Tao. I want to learn a lot about China. I want to know everything close to you! I have choices to make... sometimes I think wont it be easier I debuting my own country where i'm speaking my own language? But I think this challenge it really worth it. I grow and learn with you."

"But why!?" I asked, my heart it so beating in side my chest!

"Because... you are you. Just looking at you make me happy. It alwys has, but now I have added pleasure to talking with you, to room with you... and now to touch you... to hold you... to comfort you. I never feel so grateful in my life!"

"M...minseok," i say his real name. "hyung..."

I throw my arms around him. Why!? Why it not him I'm love? His words so beautiful to me but I cannot return more beautiful words to him. I can only cry and hug him and he hug back.

"Hyung..."

 I kiss his lips and his thumbs wipe the tears from my cheeks. I break away.

"Hyung! I never hear such beautiful words before!" i said... except I did... I heard words, beatiful like that from Kris but... they about Luhan! I don't wnat to think about that so I lay down on the bed and look up at Xiumin.

"Hyung... please... make me forget about everythign else. Please erase this pain in my heart.... I want to forget..."

I close my eyes and begin to the top of my pajama.

"Zitao..."

"Please... Minseok hyung... if you deny me right now, after what you just said, i don't know how I can go on... so..." I reach out and grab his hand and guide it onto my chest. "Please..." I push his hand down my chest and let go when it get to my belly.

I bet he can feel myself trembling because I so wired up. But I need to feel loved. I need it. If Kris won't do it I need someone who will...

-to be continued-

AN- i plan to write a Kris POV chapter soon! then you see how Kis really feel about tao >:3 hehehe sorry for long wait btw. I had some busy things to do and also computer problem. I am back now