Paradise

In Search of Meaning
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They had left Jonghyun's apartment during the night, and they didn't arrive until ten o'clock in the morning. However, it seemed the youngest in the group was well rested.

"Freedom!" Hyuk shouted the word like a war-cry as he bolted out of the Honda and ran up the grassy slope towards the large cabin at the top.

"Yah! Help us unload!" Hongbin called after the maknae as he stepped out of the vehicle, only to be ignored as Woohyun zipped past him to join the youngest.

Everyone breathed in fresh air as they exited the vehicles, finding themselves surrounded by trees and green grass. Since the cabin was at the edge of a mountain range, they could see tall rocky peaks above the canopies of the trees. The cars were parked in front of the garage that was at the bottom of the slope, and Hakyeon was the last one to step out into the open.

"Wah..." Hakyeon gaped in awe at the cabin. "Wonsik, I thought you said the cabin might be a little small. If this is your idea of 'small', then I don't want to know what 'big' is to you."

"Well, it is a little small for housing ten people," Wonsik explained. "The living room and the kitchen are enormous, and there are only three bedrooms and one bathroom."

"Jonghyun, how can you afford a place like this?" Hakyeon asked the platinum-haired man, who was currently helping Leo and Hongbin unload their things from the back of the van.

"You'd be surprised how much a mechanic can make, if business is good enough," Jonghyun replied as he set down a heavy box full of cooking ware.

"Guys!" Hongbin barked suddenly, making the mechanic jump slightly. "Come back here and help us, or else!" 

"Woohoo!" Hyuk whooped as he ignored the cyborg, and rolled halfway down the slope like a five year old. Woohyun then ran up to him and not so gently sat on top of him, causing Hyuk to let out cries of protest.

Hongbin sighed as he watched the two idiots, then yelled, "You asked for it!" He looked to the blonde who was helping Dr. Sin unload the Honda, "Key?"

The cheetah man set down the large suitcase he had taken out of the trunk, and mumbled, "On it."

Within a second, Key was charging at the two, who upon seeing his approach tried to retreat to the cabin screeching girlish screams. However, their efforts were in vain, for just as they were about to reach the cabin Key had launched into the air and landed on Hyuk's shoulders, sending the giant tumbling down. During the fall, Key managed to stay seated on Hyuk's shoulders while he reached forward to grab Woohyun's legs, since the brunette was only feet ahead of the younger. When both boys were on the ground, Key kept his legs locked around Hyuk's neck while keeping his arms wrapped around Woohyun's legs, effectively immobilizing them.

"Will you two stop acting like children, and help us with the damn luggage?!" Key demanded of the struggling boys.

"Never!" Hyuk declaration was followed by Woohyun's shout, "We're children at heart!"

To this, Key responded by tighting and twisting his hold, causing both of them to cry out in mild pain. The rest of the group was watching in amusement as the sounds of their childish screams echoed across the yard. Except for Hongbin, who was watching the scene in admiration.

"Wow~ Talk about killing two birds with one stone," the cyborg said to no one in particular.

Hakyeon chuckled at Hongbin's comment as he closed the van's hatch door with a slam. The vet then lifted a stuffed yet light duffel bag, which he guessed was full of the sleeping bags and pillows. He only took one step towards the cabin before he felt someone take the bag from his hands.

"Nope," Leo said as he hefted the bag over his shoulder. "You're injured." Hakyeon watched the wolf man begin the trek up the slope with not only the duffel bag, but also two heavy backpacks on his back.

The vet jogged up next to Leo, reaching out for the duffel as he whined, "Leo, it only has pillows and sleeping bags. It's not even that heavy."

Leo moved the bag out of his reach, ignoring Hakyeon's huff of annoyance, "No."

Wonsik and Jaehwan followed behind the duo, the musician carrying the backpack with the clothes their were borrowing from Jonghyun and Woohyun. Jaehwan carried Woohyun's luggage, since the assistant mechanic was busy wrestling the cheetah man with Hyuk. 

"It's bigger than I remember," Jaehwan said, referring to the cabin.

"Well, we were only here for a weekend last year," Wonsik recalled. After Jonghyun bought the cabin, the first thing he did was invite Wonsik, Jaehwan, Woohyun, Onew, and Sungjae to help him move brand new furniture into the place. It took a whole weekend, but on the last day they enough time to goof off and enjoy themselves. "Do you remember when Sungjae pushed Onew into the lake?"

Jaehwan barked a laugh, "Ha! That was great! He was so mad. For a second, I thought I saw his eyes turn blue."

"Blue?" Wonsik tilted his head, questioning his boyfriend. "Don't you mean red?"

"No, blue." Jaehwan stated casually, like there was nothing weird about what he was saying. "It was just my imagination, though, 'Sikkie."

Behind the lovebirds, Hongbin was hauling Hyuk's bag while also carrying a backpack. Dr. Sin walked by his left side, carrying his own suitcase, while Jonghyun was to his right, dragging his own luggage and holding the box of cooking ware in his right arm like a giant, heavy football. Hongbin adjusted the backpack straps on his shoulders as he looked ahead at Key, who had somehow gotten Hyuk into a headlock while sitting on Woohyun.

"Jeez, I just wanted him to bring them back to help us, not kill them." Hongbin said, wincing when Hyuk yelped after trying to escape the cheetah man's death grip.

Dr. Sin sighed, "No wonder you kids keep getting hurt. Looks like I'll have my work cut out for me."

"Hey," Jonghyun joined in the conversation. "Thanks again, for everything you're doing for us."

"No problem," Dr. Sin smiled. "It's my job to take care of people in need."

"By the way," Hongbin questioned. "Does St. Paul Hospital know what you're doing? I mean, who knows how long you'll be here. You're going to miss quite a few days of work."

The doctor shook his head, "Actually, I don't work at St. Paul Hospital anymore." Both Jonghyun's and Hongbin's eyes widened in shock.

"Why?! What happened?" Hongbin asked. "Was it because you helped us escape the suits?"

Dr. Sin pressed his lips in a thin line, thinking carefully before saying, "Let's just say the suits didn't appreciate being sent on a wild goose chase. It seems whoever they work for has a lot of power. The hospital let me go later that day." He saw the guilty look on Hongbin's face, and quickly added, "But it was worth it! My wife has been trying to convince me to work at a different hospital for years, anyways. If I had to do it over again, I would make the same choices. Really, it's fine."

Hongbin smiled meekly, "Thanks, Dr. Sin."

The doctor returned the smile, which then quickly faded when he looked ahead of them, "Hey! Put him down!" Dr. Sin scolded Hyuk and Woohyun, who had finally gotten the upper hand and were holding Key off the ground by the arms and legs. They looked like they were about to toss the cheetah man, which didn't happen thanks to Dr. Sin's intervention.

 

~  ~  ~

 

After Jonghyun gave them a short tour of the cabin, everybody started to argue over who got the bedrooms and who was going to be sleeping on the couch and living room floor. It was eventually settled by Dr. Sin, who reasoned that it was only fair for Jonghyun to get a bedroom since he was the owner of the place. Jonghyun then stated that he wanted Key to be his roommate, since he didn't want the cheetah man sleeping on the hardwood floor of the living room. He insisted that it was because he was concerned that the blonde would injure his tail while sleeping on such a hard surface, but everyone knew it was because he simply wanted to stay close to Key.

Woohyun was surprisingly okay with his friend's decision, considering he even helped pay for the cabin as well. In fact, he volunteered to sleep on the couch.

"Dr. Sin, you get a bedroom to yourself since you're the oldest," Jonghyun told the doctor respectfully. He then pointed at Hongbin and Hyuk, "You two sleep on the floor since you're the youngest of all of us." The mechanic ignored their whines as he turned to Hakyeon, "I think you should sleep on a bed, since you're injured. And you'll have to room with Jaehwan, because it might be difficult for him to sleep on the floor with those wings."

"Actually," Wonsik interjected. "Jjong, do you still have that tent in the storage closet?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Jaehwan and I are going to camp out tonight, then." Wonsik stated with finality, surprising everyone; including Jaehwan.

"Why?" Jonghyun asked, unable to think of any reason why the musician would want to go camping in this situation.

Wonsik turned to Jaehwan, "Do you want to have tonight?"

Instantly, everyone's cheeks gained a pink tint, except for Dr. Sin who wasn't bothered by the statement at all. Jaehwan's face flushed a deep red that spreaded to the tips of his ears and down his neck.

"U-um," Jaehwan mumbled, eyes darting between the others' faces as he debated whether he should answer truthfully or not. However, Wonsik already saw the answer in his boyfriend's eyes.

"That's why," Wonsik answered, turning back to Jonghyun. "Unless, you want to hear us going at it all night-"

"Okay!" Jonghyun exclaimed, stopping his friend from going any further. "Wonsik and Jaehwan are camping out, so Leo and Hakyeon get the third bedroom."

With that, everyone began to settle in, except for Wonsik and Jaehwan who began preparing for their little camping trip. Hongbin and Hyuk worked on laying out their sleeping bags and pillows in the living room, while Hakyeon and Leo went to the upstairs bedroom to unpack. Key went to the right side of the cabin where the main bedroom

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Kasou9
#1
Chapter 46: Hi i know its been a long time since you wrote this but anyway...i understand that you are no longer a starlight its sad but things like that hapoen to every fan ..... i also know that a lot of people love this story just like me and honestly i really want a happy ending for this the main reason is jonghyun because i only started reading this this week and when i first saw his name i was really sad he was in the fic then i realised you wrote this in 2015 _2016 and as the story went on i couldn't help but somehow just wish this would end happily because jonghyun is alive here and he gets to live and be happy in the end idk its weird to think that way but i felt glad he was in the fic and i was grateful to you but like
Dont remove him please it would be too sad at least like this remember him from time to time ppl will remember him while reading this fic i would really want to see the rest of the fic but its your choice after all and in case you dont finish it i still wanna thank you for the story it was lovely and thank you for sharing our love for vixx and shinee even if it ended somehow ♡
BlingBlingTiger
#2
Chapter 46: I think you need to do what you feel is best for you. We all need time to grieve and come to terms with what happened. I cried for days when I got the news and it feels like a part of me has been ripped away. I understand you not wanting to continue with him as a character in the story.
As for VIXX... Everyone has different opinions and ways of seeing things and dealing with situations...personally, when I see them exhausted and struggling, I worry about them, I want to lift some of the burden somehow. I want to tell them to rest and take care of themselves, but I also want to tell them to keep doing their best. I believe that VIXX and Starlights are a unit together and that it's our job to support and encourage each other. I love them all so, so much and their well-being (physically, mentally and emotionally) is of the utmost importance to me and so I worry a lot but I am also immensely proud of them. They always do their best and work hard to be the best that they can be while showing their appreciation for Starlights and I find that really admirable. Even exhausted, they give it their all to show their fans something amazing because they love Starlights and their passion for what they do is boundless. Seeing their determination despite the difficulties they face just makes me love them even more. To be honest, I could never abandon them like that. Leaving them because they were tired... is not a good reason. It's a shame that you couldn't grasp the immense effort they put in to show you a good performance.
Do what you want with the story and don't continue if you really can't, but please try to be more understanding of others in the future. We are all human beings and it is imperative to remember that they are humans too.
SuperShinee2pm2ne1 #3
Chapter 46: I think you should still continue writing the story. Though I understand the point about Jonghyun and with that I think you can 3 things with his character. The 1st option is to keep writing it with him in it, 2nd option is to exchange someone from another group with him and take the time to rewrite his parts to fit said new character and the 3rd option is to remove home out of the story completely. I personally would be sad if you take his character out but it's not my story to say any of the final stuff regarding the story. What ever you end up doing I'll respect it.
lunaticJTW
#4
Chapter 1: Whoa Taek calm ur
shuzyah
#5
Chapter 46: I am fine with not reading Jonghyun in the story for the time being, as it will hurt for the fans, and it will be tough for you too since you are questioning it. As for supporting VIXX.. considering what happen to Jonghyun, everyone r humans, including VIXX & yourself. If u need to stop the story, or keep it on hitaus, or continue, it is totally up to u, and i will support u & respect ur decision.
JungHyunRi
#6
Chapter 46: Hi authornim.. Finally u are back.. Or atleast have inform ur whereabouts..
1stly.. I am very agree with ChaYuume comment bellow..
Its up to u.. If u want to resume this story or not.. If u alr lost interest abt this story.. Bcz If u keep write this story.. U'll feel burden in fact.. U also can't give soul to ur story..
2nd abt ur experience in VIXX concert.. Well
I have my own experience for VIXX in SEA last July.. And truth to be told as ChaYuumee said.. We can't decide that some idols not give them all to fans (I telk this not only in name of VIXX but every idol in general)
Yepp u must be known that before VIXX have a concert at ur country, they alr had many scheduled they done.. And don't u think they stamina and energy almost zero? But they keep their scheduled over ur country.. If that not a way of their act to show Starlight Canada how they really appreciate ur invite?

Truth be told.. I alr attend Super Show concert in my countries for 5 times.. And the 2 times I attend were SS4 when they held 3 days a row in my country.. And they seriously exhausted at the 2nd day (1st day I attend the concert) And when I attended the last days (I atrended the 2nd and 3rd days).. They looked so hype and excited.. Maybe bcz that day is their last so they could rest.. And they really gave their all out energy in the final days..

Its humanly abt idol tho..

So If u seriously thinking,u couldn't be a starlight anymore just bcz of ur 1st experience,, well sorry to say.. Im a little bit disappointes with ur fell tho.. Huhu..

If u told them not give their all just bcz of ur guessing abt they weren't as excited as the fans there.. Its not wise for them too.. ㅠㅠ
Sorry..
edrylla_Dya #7
Chapter 46: I love this story. I love it's character. I hope the characters stays until the end. But if it's hard for you, I can understand. Thank you for your hard work author-nim

In the light of Jonghyun's passing and in the light of your experience to VIXX concert. Shinee is forever one of my favourite group. They're the second one after tvxq. When I love a group, that's mean no picking biases because I love them all. It tattered me very much, as a person who's much less experiencing the same mental illness. He could have a better future but maybe this is the best for him. And VIXX is, we can see from their schedule how packed it is. Entertaining people seem easy because we're watching without experiencing. Somehow, I hope you still love them the same.

-for we're neither immortal nor invincible-
verse2wo
#8
Chapter 46: While I would like for this story to continue, I understand why you would want to stop.
In light of recent events, it would be a different story without Jonghyun.
I wish you well and support whatever choices you make.
ChaYuume
#9
Hello~!☆
So, first of all...
Your story is one of the best I ever read, the suspense and all were really... Overwhelming?
Anyway thank for writing such a story.
But, if you feels like you can't continue to write it, I think we can all understand it.
It's true that only you knows what future you had reserved to the characters of this story, and with Jonghyun's passing, I understand that it's harder, knowing also what the story is about.
Whether we are fans or not, it affect us all. We all knows who Shinee are, their songs, they had a major impact on kpop.
Even if it's in different ways, even if we dont have the same way to cope with that, to mourn, or whatsoever, it'll leave an impact on all of us.
(It's still a sensible point, I'll move on...)

Secondly, concerning your experience at VIXX's concert.... Well...They are humans.
You can't expect idols to always give it their all when they are exhausted or feels down, even if they are trying it could also not works sometimes. You can't say that they dont care for their fans, not after all they do FOR their fans. Even over their exhaustion, Idols gives you a good performance, even if they're feeling down or aren't in the mood, they take over themselves.
Say, when you are exhausted, are you in a state where you can do anything else aside from resting?
So why would it be different for idols, they are not robots. They push themselves and push their problem asides for the sake of their carreer. For the sake of their own health. The recent situation is sadly the proof of that.
You don't know what is really happening in their lives, they all have their own problems, whichever idol it can be.
And, with all that we know about Korea's idol industry,...

With all of that said, if you lost your motivation over this concert experience and the loss of Jonghyun; if you don't want to continue this story, I think that it's better to just stop it there (even if, I'm sure, we would have liked a proper ending).
In the end, its your story, we are your readers; as long as you feels good with your decision, we must respect it.

Thanks for your hard work~*