Unexpected Encounters

In Search of Meaning
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Wonsik scrunched up his face unhappily at the light of the morning sun coming through the window in the living room, and he sat up with a groan on the couch. He rubbed his sore neck, and looked around at his surroundings wondering why he was in the living room. Then he remembered the emotional events of the night before, and how after they were finally able to calm down Wonsik volunteered to sleep on the couch since Jaehwan was obviously uncomfortable with sharing a bed with someone he barely knew.

With a sigh, Wonsik sluggishly rolled off the couch and shuffled to the kitchen to make himself a mug of instant coffee. As he stirred the hot liquid, he glanced at the digital clock on the stove. 10:33. Placing the coffee stained spoon on the countertop, he turned around with the mug raised to his lips, and walked towards the bedroom to wake his amnesiac boyfriend.

He knocked gently on the open door as he entered, saying with a hoarse morning voice, "Jaehwannie~, time to get up." Seeing no response from the other, Wonsik took it a step further and switched on the bedroom light. Jaehwan stirred under the covers and groaned in disapproval.

"Five more minutes," Jaehwan mumbled sleepily, voice muffled by the blanket he pulled over his head. Wonsik chuckled airily, and strode over to the bedside. He gave Jaehwan a mild shake on his shoulder, causing him to elicit an even louder groan.

"It's already past 10," Wonsik leaned down to whisper Jaehwan's blanket-covered ear. "Come on, I'll make you some coffee."

With a small huff Jaehwan shoved the covers off, and slowly pushed himself up to a sitting position. However, when he propped himself up on his elbow he winced and fell back to the mattress. Seeing his slight distress, all the fatigue in Wonsik's body evaporated and was replaced with concern. 

"You okay, babe?" Wonsik sat on the edge of the bed, placing a comforting hand on Jaehwan's shoulder.

Jaehwan nodded, "I'm fine, but I think the anaesthesia wore off."

"Okay." Wonsik said, jumping up and walking briskly to the door. "The vicodin is in my jacket pocket. I'll be back in a sec'."

Jaehwan watched him disappear down the hall, and ignoring the aching pain in his back he was able to push himself up into a sitting position. Seconds later, Wonsik came speeding back into the room, twisting the cap off of the pill bottle in his hands. As he tapped two white tablets into the palm of Jaehwan's hand, he asked, "Do you need water?" 

"No," Jaehwan replied, and popped the pills into his mouth. "Thank you, though."

Wonsik noticed the discomfort in his expression as Jaehwan moved his legs to the side of the bed in preparation to stand up. However, before Jaehwan could leave the bed Wonsik placed two firm hands on his shoulders, urging him to stay seated.

"Let me check your bandages first." Wonsik said as he crawled on the mattress to kneel behind Jaehwan.

Slowly, he lifted the hem of Jaehwan's shirt and carefully pulled it up over the pair of wings tucked underneath. After the shirt was removed, Wonsik examined the gauze wrapped around the base of each wing, and was relieved to see no signs of blood. His gaze then wandered up from the base to the gauze wrapped around the rest of the appendages. He pulled up a strip of gauze near the tip of one of the wings, peeking underneath to see a few black feathers lying beneath.

"Do you need to wrap your wings entirely?" Wonsik asked curiously.

Jaehwan glanced over his shoulder, "No. I just had them like that so they would be easier to hide."

"Well," Wonsik spoke as he slowly began unwrapping one of the wings, "Since you're safe here in the apartment, you don't have to hide them anymore." He paused in his actions when he asked, "Is it alright if I unwrap them?"

He heard Jaehwan inhale hesitantly, but continued when his boyfriend gave him a small nod. Wonsik watched in fascination as black feathers became more visible with every strip of gauze he unraveled, and he made sure to leave the bandages around the base of the wings untouched. Eventually, he was left staring at the two feathery appendages in all their glory. Even though they still had a few bald patches of skin and the feathers were oily from being wrapped up all the time, he still found them undeniably beautiful. 

Somewhat in a daze, Wonsik placed a hand near the base of one of the right wing, and slid it gently over the silky feathers up to the joint, then down to the tip where the short primary feathers were beginning to grow. When his hand brushed over a patch of skin, Jaehwan flinched. 

Wonsik immediately withdrew, "I'm sorry. Did that hurt?" Jaehwan turned halfway around to face him, with a look of mild surprise as he shook his head.

"No," Jaehwan mumbled softly as if he were talking to himself. "It didn't hurt, but I felt it."

Confused, Wonsik cocked his head to the side. "What do you mean?"

Jaehwan met his gaze, suddenly seeming more excited as he answered, "Before the nerves started connecting, I had no sense of feeling in them at all. But, just now I felt you touching it, and it didn't hurt. It didn't hurt!" Jaehwan's face broke into a wide smile, and he bounced giddily on the bed. "Do it again! With the other one this time!"

Giving his boyfriend a questioning glance, he gingerly ran his hand over the other wing the same way he did with the first. Again, when he came into contact with skin Jaehwan flinched slightly, but this time he didn't pull his hand away. He then used his other hand so he could pet both wings at the same time, and after a few seconds of this Jaehwan started to giggle.

Wonsik couldn't help but smile at the sound, "Why are you laughing?"

"Because it tickles." Jaehwan replied with a laugh. "Oh!" He straightened up suddenly as if a thought struck him. "Maybe I can try moving them!"

Wonsik shook his head, removing his hands as he looked Jaehwan in the eyes saying, "No, Jaehwannie. You have stitches, remember? You should wait until you're completely healed before trying anything."

"But-"

"Nope." Wonsik pointed a no-nonsense finger at Jaehwan's face. "You will wait until the stitches are removed."

Jaehwan's excitement deflated, and he pouted, "Are you always a kill-joy?"

"Pretty much," Wonsik replied nonchalantly, then asked, "So, do you want me to cut some holes in a couple of your shirts for your wings, or do you want to wander around the apartment half ?"

Jaehwan shrugged, "Cutting holes in shirts sounds like a good idea." He looked at Wonsik over his shoulder and a suggestive smirk on his lips when he added, "Unless you'd prefer the second option."

Wonsik's jaw dropped at his boyfriend's unexpected reply, and before he could say anything Jaehwan stood up and walked out of the bedroom to the kitchen, shirtless. For a moment he sat frozen on the bed, replaying the last few seconds over and over in his head so that he wouldn't forget the expression he just witnessed on Jaehwan's face. It was an expression he hadn't seen since their anniversary night two weeks ago, and seeing it now paired with the black wings somehow doubled its iness.

"Wonsik-ssi!" Jaehwan called from the kitchen. "What should we eat for breakfast?"

Broken out of his daze, Wonsik walked out of the bedroom replying, "I'll make us some egg sandwiches!"

 

~  ~  ~

 

Half an hour later, Jaehwan and Wonsik were sitting on the sofa eating egg sandwiches while watching TV. Wonsik finished the last bites of his sandwich, and he stood up to take his plate back to the kitchen. He noticed that Jaehwan was also finishing his last bites, so he waited a moment until he was done and took his plate as well.

As he set the plates into the double basin sink, Jaehwan asked from the sofa, "So, what are we going to do today?"

"I am going to stop in at my work to let my boss know I can start working again in a few days." Wonsik answered over the sound of the faucet running as he started washing the dishes. "You are going to stay here and rest."

"Aw~" Jaehwan whined. "What am I supposed to do all day? Sit here and do nothing?"

"If you have to, yes. But I'm sure you'll find things to do, like cutting holes in the backs of shirts or listening to the stereo in our room."

"Can't I just come with you?" Jaehwan rested his chin on the back of the sofa, looking at Wonsik with round puppy eyes. "I promise I'll be careful with my stitches."

"No." Wonsik responded firmly. "Besides, the 'suits' might be somewhere out there waiting for you to come out of hiding, and there's no way I'm letting them get you again."

Jaehwan sighed in defeat, "Fine. I'll stay here."

"Good." Wonsik turned off the faucet and placed the clean plates onto the drying rack in the other sink.

Jaehwan watched Wonsik stroll into the bedroom, and a few minutes later he came back out wearing a clean set of clothes. The musician walked down the hall to the entranceway of the apartment, and sat on the front step to slip his shoes on.

"Do you have to leave now?" Wonsik heard Jaehwan ask from behind, and he looked over his shoulder to reply. However, he paused when he saw the dejected look on his boyfriend's face.

With a sigh, Wonsik stood up with one shoe left untied, and slid his hands around Jaehwan's bare waist to pull him closer until there was only an inch of space between them. Wonsik leaned his head down to rest his forehead against Jaehwan's, and the winged man's cheeks tinted pink at the closeness.

Keeping his eyes locked with Jaehwan's, Wonsik responded, "Don't worry, I promise I'll be back really quick. Okay?"

Jaehwan gulped under the intensity of Wonsik's gaze as he said those words, and nodded.

Wonsik smiled, "Okay. While I'm gone, don't open the door for anyone except me, and don't answer the phone unless the ID says it's my cell. Also, if you decide to take a shower, remember to keep your stitches-"

"Dry." Jaehwan finished for him with a grin. "I know, I was there when Doctor Sin explained it to you."

"Right," Wonsik lifted his head up to give his boyfriend a quick peck on the forehead, and he pulled back from the light embrace to finish tying his other shoe. Jaehwan touched the skin of his forehead where Wonsik's lips touched, and he felt his cheeks burn as his blush deepened. He didn't know why, but the area where Wonsik's soft lips touched felt like it was tingling with electricity.

"I should be back within an hour," Wonsik said as he slipped his jacket on. "I'll call you if anything else comes up. Find my number in the phonebook application on our phone, and call me if something happens while I'm gone."

"N-ne," Jaehwan replied timidly, removing his fingers from his forehead. Wonsik chuckled at how cute Jaehwan looked when he was shy and blushing at the same time.

He ruffled Jaehwan's black hair lovingly, "See you later, Jaehwannie." Wonsik turned around and opened the door just enough for him to squeeze through, not risking the chance for someone in the hall to peek inside at his winged boyfriend.

"Drive safe!" Jaehwan called out to Wonsik before the door closed, and he found himself standing alone in the entryway of the silent apartment. He looked around for a second and wondered out loud to himself, "Ottokaji?"

 

~  ~  ~

 

Wonsik walked out of the apartment building turning his head back and forth, making sure there weren't any black SUV's nearby or men in black suits. Seeing no signs of 'them', he strolled over to red Kia and plopped into the driver's seat. When he turned the ignition, he noticed right away that the engine idle was fluctuating.

"Damn it." He mumbled grumpily, kicking himself for thinking he could use this car in a car chase without having consequences. Carefully, he put the vehicle in gear, and backed out of his parking spot.

After Wonsik pulled out of the parking lot and started gradually picking up speed on the road, he suddenly heard a rumbling coming from the front wheels of the Kia. He hissed a curse under his breath, and a few minutes later he was parking in front of the music store. Before getting out of his car, he pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and dialed his home phone number.

"H-hello? Wonsik?" Wonsik heard Jaehwan answer on the other end, and he tilted his head in confusion when he heard how out of breath his boyfriend sounded.

"Hey, Jaehwannie." Wonsik spoke slowly, listening as Jaehwan's breathing began to return to normal. "I was just calling to let you know I need to quickly stop by the autoshop after checking in at work. Is everything okay?"

"Y-yeah," Jaehwan replied quickly. "Everything's fine."

"Then why do you sound like that?" Wonsik asked, beginning to feel a little worried.

"Oh, I was just...um..." There was a silent pause as if Jaehwan was thinking about what to say next. "Excersizing." He finally finished.

"Excersizing?" Wonsik furrowed his brows. "I've only been gone for ten minutes. What kind of 'excersize' are you doing that's got you so winded already?"

"Um," Jaehwan paused again, and Wonsik sighed to keep his patience. Suddenly, he heard a loud thud and clatter on the other end of the line.

"What was that?" Wonsik inquired worriedly.

"Nothing! Don't worry." Jaehwan exclaimed loudly, and then hurriedly said, "I've gotta go. Drive safe!"

"Wha-" The line went dead before Wonsik to question him any further, and the musician looked at his cell phone in disbelief. "Heol. He lost his memories, but he sure as heck didn't lose his quirks."

Feeling the need to go home as soon as possible, Wonsik quickly rushed into the music store and briefly let his boss know he was able to work again. Within minute

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Kasou9
#1
Chapter 46: Hi i know its been a long time since you wrote this but anyway...i understand that you are no longer a starlight its sad but things like that hapoen to every fan ..... i also know that a lot of people love this story just like me and honestly i really want a happy ending for this the main reason is jonghyun because i only started reading this this week and when i first saw his name i was really sad he was in the fic then i realised you wrote this in 2015 _2016 and as the story went on i couldn't help but somehow just wish this would end happily because jonghyun is alive here and he gets to live and be happy in the end idk its weird to think that way but i felt glad he was in the fic and i was grateful to you but like
Dont remove him please it would be too sad at least like this remember him from time to time ppl will remember him while reading this fic i would really want to see the rest of the fic but its your choice after all and in case you dont finish it i still wanna thank you for the story it was lovely and thank you for sharing our love for vixx and shinee even if it ended somehow ♡
BlingBlingTiger
#2
Chapter 46: I think you need to do what you feel is best for you. We all need time to grieve and come to terms with what happened. I cried for days when I got the news and it feels like a part of me has been ripped away. I understand you not wanting to continue with him as a character in the story.
As for VIXX... Everyone has different opinions and ways of seeing things and dealing with situations...personally, when I see them exhausted and struggling, I worry about them, I want to lift some of the burden somehow. I want to tell them to rest and take care of themselves, but I also want to tell them to keep doing their best. I believe that VIXX and Starlights are a unit together and that it's our job to support and encourage each other. I love them all so, so much and their well-being (physically, mentally and emotionally) is of the utmost importance to me and so I worry a lot but I am also immensely proud of them. They always do their best and work hard to be the best that they can be while showing their appreciation for Starlights and I find that really admirable. Even exhausted, they give it their all to show their fans something amazing because they love Starlights and their passion for what they do is boundless. Seeing their determination despite the difficulties they face just makes me love them even more. To be honest, I could never abandon them like that. Leaving them because they were tired... is not a good reason. It's a shame that you couldn't grasp the immense effort they put in to show you a good performance.
Do what you want with the story and don't continue if you really can't, but please try to be more understanding of others in the future. We are all human beings and it is imperative to remember that they are humans too.
SuperShinee2pm2ne1 #3
Chapter 46: I think you should still continue writing the story. Though I understand the point about Jonghyun and with that I think you can 3 things with his character. The 1st option is to keep writing it with him in it, 2nd option is to exchange someone from another group with him and take the time to rewrite his parts to fit said new character and the 3rd option is to remove home out of the story completely. I personally would be sad if you take his character out but it's not my story to say any of the final stuff regarding the story. What ever you end up doing I'll respect it.
lunaticJTW
#4
Chapter 1: Whoa Taek calm ur
shuzyah
#5
Chapter 46: I am fine with not reading Jonghyun in the story for the time being, as it will hurt for the fans, and it will be tough for you too since you are questioning it. As for supporting VIXX.. considering what happen to Jonghyun, everyone r humans, including VIXX & yourself. If u need to stop the story, or keep it on hitaus, or continue, it is totally up to u, and i will support u & respect ur decision.
JungHyunRi
#6
Chapter 46: Hi authornim.. Finally u are back.. Or atleast have inform ur whereabouts..
1stly.. I am very agree with ChaYuume comment bellow..
Its up to u.. If u want to resume this story or not.. If u alr lost interest abt this story.. Bcz If u keep write this story.. U'll feel burden in fact.. U also can't give soul to ur story..
2nd abt ur experience in VIXX concert.. Well
I have my own experience for VIXX in SEA last July.. And truth to be told as ChaYuumee said.. We can't decide that some idols not give them all to fans (I telk this not only in name of VIXX but every idol in general)
Yepp u must be known that before VIXX have a concert at ur country, they alr had many scheduled they done.. And don't u think they stamina and energy almost zero? But they keep their scheduled over ur country.. If that not a way of their act to show Starlight Canada how they really appreciate ur invite?

Truth be told.. I alr attend Super Show concert in my countries for 5 times.. And the 2 times I attend were SS4 when they held 3 days a row in my country.. And they seriously exhausted at the 2nd day (1st day I attend the concert) And when I attended the last days (I atrended the 2nd and 3rd days).. They looked so hype and excited.. Maybe bcz that day is their last so they could rest.. And they really gave their all out energy in the final days..

Its humanly abt idol tho..

So If u seriously thinking,u couldn't be a starlight anymore just bcz of ur 1st experience,, well sorry to say.. Im a little bit disappointes with ur fell tho.. Huhu..

If u told them not give their all just bcz of ur guessing abt they weren't as excited as the fans there.. Its not wise for them too.. ㅠㅠ
Sorry..
edrylla_Dya #7
Chapter 46: I love this story. I love it's character. I hope the characters stays until the end. But if it's hard for you, I can understand. Thank you for your hard work author-nim

In the light of Jonghyun's passing and in the light of your experience to VIXX concert. Shinee is forever one of my favourite group. They're the second one after tvxq. When I love a group, that's mean no picking biases because I love them all. It tattered me very much, as a person who's much less experiencing the same mental illness. He could have a better future but maybe this is the best for him. And VIXX is, we can see from their schedule how packed it is. Entertaining people seem easy because we're watching without experiencing. Somehow, I hope you still love them the same.

-for we're neither immortal nor invincible-
verse2wo
#8
Chapter 46: While I would like for this story to continue, I understand why you would want to stop.
In light of recent events, it would be a different story without Jonghyun.
I wish you well and support whatever choices you make.
ChaYuume
#9
Hello~!☆
So, first of all...
Your story is one of the best I ever read, the suspense and all were really... Overwhelming?
Anyway thank for writing such a story.
But, if you feels like you can't continue to write it, I think we can all understand it.
It's true that only you knows what future you had reserved to the characters of this story, and with Jonghyun's passing, I understand that it's harder, knowing also what the story is about.
Whether we are fans or not, it affect us all. We all knows who Shinee are, their songs, they had a major impact on kpop.
Even if it's in different ways, even if we dont have the same way to cope with that, to mourn, or whatsoever, it'll leave an impact on all of us.
(It's still a sensible point, I'll move on...)

Secondly, concerning your experience at VIXX's concert.... Well...They are humans.
You can't expect idols to always give it their all when they are exhausted or feels down, even if they are trying it could also not works sometimes. You can't say that they dont care for their fans, not after all they do FOR their fans. Even over their exhaustion, Idols gives you a good performance, even if they're feeling down or aren't in the mood, they take over themselves.
Say, when you are exhausted, are you in a state where you can do anything else aside from resting?
So why would it be different for idols, they are not robots. They push themselves and push their problem asides for the sake of their carreer. For the sake of their own health. The recent situation is sadly the proof of that.
You don't know what is really happening in their lives, they all have their own problems, whichever idol it can be.
And, with all that we know about Korea's idol industry,...

With all of that said, if you lost your motivation over this concert experience and the loss of Jonghyun; if you don't want to continue this story, I think that it's better to just stop it there (even if, I'm sure, we would have liked a proper ending).
In the end, its your story, we are your readers; as long as you feels good with your decision, we must respect it.

Thanks for your hard work~*