Saet-byul sat absolutely still as they all sat crowded at a small table in the corner of the cafe, squished between both Jae-hwan and Sang-hyuk. Taek-woon and the second guy sat on the other side. The guy never said anything to them, instead silently glaring at Saet-byul and looking like he was close to jumping across the table and strangling her. Taek-woon had a hand on the guy’s hand as if stopping him, and Jae-hwan in turn had a comforting hand on Saet-byul’s.

The tension was stifling.

Taek-woon was the first to speak. “Saet-byul-”

“Did N not come?” she whimpered out, finally mustering enough courage to look up at him. That was a mistake; the other guy snarled at her, Taek-woon reacting and barely being able to hold him back.

“How dare you ask about him,” he growled, his whole body shaking with rage. “You’ve been hurting him and you dare-

“Stop it Hong-bin,” Taek-woon whispered softly, and the guy, Hong-bin, begrudgingly shut his mouth. “I’m sorry, Hak-yeon wasn’t feeling well this morning and wasn’t able to come.” Sang-hyuk glanced over to Saet-byul to see her face fall slightly, though she nodded understandingly to the other. He sent Jae-hwan a look, one the older boy returned; the two of them felt like outsiders, neither understanding the subtle undertones of the conversation.

Sang-hyuk eventually felt a pair of eyes land on him, and he looked up to see Taek-woon staring at him. “Is this Hyukkie?” he asked softly, and he felt himself bristling.

“Don’t call me that.”

Taek-woon didn’t seem to react to his snap. “You’ve grown.”

“Don’t act so friendly with me.”

“And you’ve become mouthy.”

He glared; finding himself growing more and more frustrated with the calm, collected manner Taek-woon was able to return all his barbs. He didn’t really have anything against the older boy, but he had sided with Woo-jin and therefore became the object of his disdain by proxy. Saet-byul, without looking up, reached over and grabbed his hand, squeezing it gently to tell him to quiet down. He bit his lip as his face flushed, feeling embarrassed that he had acted so childishly in front of her.

Jae-hwan, the ignorant idiot, spoke up then, keeping his voice light and joking to try and lighten the mood. “None of us are in a hurry, we could wait for him.”

Taek-woon turned his steely eyes toward Jae-hwan, his face impassive as he looked him over. “Who are you?”

Saet-byul quickly spoke up when Jae-hwan was too shocked to answer. “Jae-hwan helped tutor me in school.”

Taek-woon nodded absentmindedly. “I see. I’m sorry; I don’t think he will be feeling well anytime soon. We’ll have to meet for that another time.”

“You should have told her beforehand,” Sang-hyuk found himself saying without thinking, again frustrated when Taek-woon only nodded his head again.

“I didn’t know she thought Hak-yeon was coming. I had no intention of bringing him here today.”

Saet-byul coughed, her whole body shaking, and Sang-hyuk looked over to see her crying. Her mascara that Jae-hwan had helped put on her started to run down her cheeks. Sang-hyuk quickly grabbed a bunch of napkins and handed them to her, instinctively starting to wipe her face. She didn’t stop him. “I...I thought he was finally coming to see me...that he’d finally forgiven me. You’ve never invited me out before, so I thought...I thought...”

Taek-woon’s face softened at her tears; the first time any expression passed his face. Sang-hyuk had almost been convinced he was a robot or something. “I’m sorry, Saet-byul. I didn’t mean to raise your hopes.”

“It’s alright...I should’ve known better.”

“No. Hak-yeon really does want to meet you.”

“He does?” she nearly shouted, sitting straight up and leaning forward. Hong-bin jerked back at the sudden movement, instinctively moving to hide behind Taek-woon. “He really wants to see me?” She took the napkins Sang-hyuk had handed her and messily wiped her tears away, sniffling as she tried to regain her composure.

“Yes, but I wanted to ask you some things first. I wasn’t aware we would have company though.”

“Ah, I’m sorry. I brought Jae-hwan and Hyukkie because I thought N was coming and I got nervous.” She looked down embarrassedly and the other sighed. "Do...do you not want them here?"

“It would be best.”

“Whatever you have to say to her can be said with us here,” Sang-hyuk snapped. He didn’t trust Taek-woon, especially when he’s giving her hope with Woo-jin, or Hak-yeon, or whatever his name was. He had just started getting her to forget and move on; he was not about to let this guy ruin everything she had accomplished.

“Stop it Sang-hyuk,” Jae-hwan said gently, smiling as he scooted his chair back and stood up. “We’ll leave you to hopefully talk everything out.” Without losing his smile, he moved over and grabbed a handful of Sang-hyuk’s coat, yanking him up. Sang-hyuk protested indignantly at being man-handled, though it seemed everyone was ignoring him. “If anything happens, little star, just call me and I’ll come right over, okay?” Saet-byul looked up at him gratefully, nodding slightly. Jae-hwan then looked up to Taek-woon and Hong-bin, his smile only growing bigger.

“And if you do anything to her, I’ll gladly come over and castrate you both.”

He didn’t give them any time to react, dragging Sang-hyuk out the door and only stopping when they were far enough away to not see the cafe anymore. Sang-hyuk opened his mouth, ready to rip into him for leaving her there, when Jae-hwan cut him off, for once serious. “Don’t you dare go back.”

“But hyung-”

“No. They need to talk this out. You and I have no idea what happened, we shouldn’t interfere.” He glared, and Jae-hwan smiled kindly. “Saet-byul will never move on if she clings onto the hope that that bastard will come back to her. The best we can do is let the fall out happen, and only after that, you can swoop in and pick up the pieces.”

--

The only reason Bin stayed still and didn’t move was because Taek-woon told him to stay still. He wasn’t going to do anything if Taek-woon wouldn’t let him. Oh, he wanted to hurt Saet-byul, rip her into tiny, tiny pieces for daring to hurt his Hak-yeon. But he would listen to Taek-woon. He wouldn’t touch her.

Taek-woon had tried sneaking out without Bin to go see Saet-byul. Bin could see him getting ready from under the bed, trying to be extra quiet so neither he nor Hak-yeon would notice. But he didn’t see Bin under his bed, so he was surprised when he crawled out, demanding to go too. He didn’t want to go outside; remembering that horrifying time Taek-woon had taken him and Hak-yeon to school. Outside was scary.

But Hak-yeon was in pain, and Bin would do anything to help him.

Even if that meant going out into the scary outside.

Taek-woon let him go, but he had to make sure not to touch Saet-byul. He wasn’t allowed to hit or yell at her, and he had to make sure he behaved well. He had a hard time agreeing, imagining beating Saet-byul in the same way her mother beat his hyungs, but he eventually did. Hak-yeon was more important than what Bin wanted. So he promised, promised he would be good, and Taek-woon let him go.

When the other two left, which Bin was very proud to have sat still the whole time they were there, Taek-woon turned to him. “Would you like to drink anything Hong-binnie?” He had to admit, he was always a little star struck whenever Taek-woon called him that, hearing his deep voice calling him the name usually reserved for Hak-yeon confusing him. Not that he didn’t like it. When he didn’t answer, just staring in a daze, Taek-woon asked again, this time firmer and without the special name. “Do you want to drink? Hong-bin?”

“A-ah...w-water.”

“Alright. Stay here, I’ll be right back.” His eyes widened in fear when Taek-woon made a move to get up, hurriedly grabbing his arm and pulling him back.

“Don’t leave Bin here,” he hissed, speaking quietly so Saet-byul wouldn’t be able to hear them. “Don’t want to be alone.”

“I won’t be long. I’m just going to go get your water-”

“I can go get it.” He stiffened at the sound of that girl’s voice, glancing out the corner of his eye to see her forcing a smile. “You can wait here. I’ll be quick.” She ran off before either of them could say anything, and Bin felt his fingers relaxing the moment she was gone. Taek-woon noticed, reaching over and patting his head gently.

“You’re doing great, Hong-bin,” he said softly, and Bin felt a wave of warmth flowing through him with each pat. He leaned into the touch, feeling incredibly safe and happy, allowing Taek-woon to wrap his arm around his shoulders and pull him into his side. It was different from how Hak-yeon made him feel, Hak-yeon making Bin feel warm and safe and nothing will ever touch him again as long as Hak-yeon was there. But Taek-woon...he felt like he could rely on him. He felt safe. His eyes closed, feeling himself falling asleep, when the sudden loud scraping of the chair scared him, and he snapped his eyes open to see Saet-byul place a cup of water in front of him. Taek-woon pulled away, and Bin suddenly felt so cold and sad, to take her cup of coffee. He glared at her for ruining everything.

It was quiet, Saet-byul looking like she wanted to say something but was too scared to, and Taek-woon calmly drinking his coffee. He exhaled gently before looking up to see how worked up she was, smiling. “Are you that worried?”

“Yes!” she nearly shouted, her face quickly reddening in embarrassment. Bin would have laughed at her if Taek-woon wasn’t right next to him.

“If you’re worried, then you need to answer everything honestly and truthfully. I can’t help either of you if you lie.”

She hesitated but eventually nodded.

“Who is hurting you?” Bin looked over at her in surprise, not having noticed that she was hurt. He didn’t notice at first, she had put some kind of magic stuff over her face to hide it, but he could see the bruises and cuts on her skin. He was an expert at noticing; he had them all over his own body, not to mention seeing it multiple times on Hak-yeon and his other hyungs. He had grown up watching and seeing those cuts and bruises becoming a part of him and the others, there were none that could get past him.

But why was she letting herself get hurt?

She could hurt them back with the dolls. Why didn’t she use the dolls?

She fidgeted, a slightly hidden bruise on her arm. “N-no one.”

“I told you, you have to tell the truth.”

She winced, her eyes starting to water. “Can’t I just say yes? I...I don’t want to say who...please don’t make me.”

Taek-woon sighed, taking another sip of his coffee. “Alright, you won’t have to say who.”

She visibly relaxed, a smile coming back to her face. “What else do you want to know? I’ll tell you anything.

“What’s your relationship with Hak-yeon?” Both he and Saet-byul froze, and he looked up at Taek-woon in horror. Taek-woon didn’t know about the dolls. He didn’t know that Hak-yeon was Saet-byul’s doll, and he wasn’t supposed to ever know. It was one of the only things Hak-yeon told Bin to promise him, to never let Taek-woon find out about what he really was. Bin had promised.

“Nothing!” Bin said quickly, shaking his arm. “Nothing!”

“Hong-bin,” Taek-woon said slowly, and he could feel the other’s scary glare on him. He normally would have cowered, but today he had to be brave. He had promised Hak-yeon.

“Can’t tell, can’t tell,” he pressed, hoping Taek-woon would understand and stop trying to ask. “Can’t ask.” He turned to Saet-byul who was staring at him in wonder. “Don’t tell. You can’t tell.”

“Stop it,” Taek-woon said irritably, grabbing Bin’s hands together and holding them tightly. “If you don’t stop, I’m going to take you home.”

He froze. No! He couldn’t go home, not until he made sure she wouldn’t hurt Hak-yeon again. He whimpered, suddenly uncertain what to do. He promised Hak-yeon, but he didn’t want to go home. He eventually pulled away, deciding making sure Hak-yeon was okay was more important. He made sure to give Taek-woon a big glare instead, hoping he realized how angry he was.

“Now Saet-byul, what is your relationship with Hak-yeon?”

She looked just as uncomfortable as Bin on how to answer. “W-why do you ask? I-I loved him and he used to take care of me. That’s all.”

Taek-woon shook his head. “I’ve felt for a long time that there’s something that all of you, you too Hong-bin, have been keeping from me. I don’t know what it is, or why you’ve been keeping it secret.”

Bin made sure to keep his eyes far away from Taek-woon’s, knowing he was saying the truth. Saet-byul was just as torn, her hands fidgeting. “It’s because you would hate me if I told you.” Taek-woon didn’t say anything, his face like the statue it always was, and Saet-byul continued. Bin noticed she started crying. “He already hates me for it,” she whimpered, gesturing to Bin. “You would hate me. Jae-hwan and Won-shik would hate me. Even...even Hyukkie would hate me.”

“You know that’s not true,” Taek-woon said gently.

“I know it’s true. How could you look at me if you knew that N was my doll?”

“Doll?” Saet-byul and Bin’s eyes widened, her slapping her hands over in horror.

“Nothing!” Bin cried, hoping to distract him. “She didn’t mean doll! Not doll!” He pulled on his arm, hoping to get him to forget about it, but it only seemed to make Taek-woon more focused.

“What do you mean he’s a doll?”

“Please forget it,” she pleaded, tears streaming down her cheeks. “Please Taek-woon oppa.”

“I can’t,” he said sternly. “Whatever is happening to you is affecting Hak-yeon, enough that he is hurting himself. I need to know so I can help him.”

That shut her up, her eyes widening. “He’s getting hurt?”

“Yes,” Bin snapped, unable to control himself when he saw her act so innocently. She knew what she was doing. She knew it every time she stabbed and pierced Hak-yeon’s doll. He knew it. He just knew it. “You’re stabbing him aren’t you? You’re twisting his insides and ripping him apart. You’re punishing him, aren’t you? You’re just like her. And then when Hak-yeon hyung is crying and begging you to stop, you’ll just laugh, you’ll laugh and hurt him all over again. That’s what you do. That’s all you do, isn’t it? You-”

“Stop it!” Bin snapped his mouth shut as he instinctively pulled back, cowering, and he glanced up through his fringe to see Saet-byul glaring at him. She was crying just as much as he was; he had started crying sometime during his shout.  “I would never touch N’s doll in such a way. I love him and would never hurt him. Don’t you ever compare me to my mother.” She glared at him, and suddenly he couldn’t see Saet-byul’s face, all he could see was her face, and he felt everything slowing.

She was looking at him. She was angry at him.

He looked around wildly for Hak-yeon, for his anchor, his reassurance that everything was alright. But Hak-yeon wasn’t here. He was alone.

She was still looking at him. She was going to punish him.

He started breathing heavily, flailing desperately for something to hold onto. He vaguely heard Taek-woon call his name and then he was smashed heavily into something soft. He cried, cried and cried as Taek-woon rocked him in his arms. He grabbed desperately at his shirt, clawing at him to make sure he was real. Taek-woon had to be real. She never had him. She never touched him.

It took him a long while until he was able to start breathing normally, his arms wrapped around Taek-woon’s waist with no intention of letting go. He relished in the feeling of Taek-woon’s hands raking through his hair, the motion incredibly soothing. He didn’t know how long this went on, didn’t want to know.

He never wanted to move again.

--

Taek-woon’s heart was still racing as he held Hong-bin in a vice-like grip, holding so tight the boy couldn’t even squirm let alone move. He sent the few other patrons apologetic looks, knowing that if they continued they’d be kicked out.

He had never seen Hong-bin have a panic attack, only heard about them in off-handed comments from Hak-yeon. Usually it was something Taek-woon did or said that would trigger them, albeit unintentionally, and Hong-bin would usually shoot out of the room. The way Hak-yeon had described them made them seem mild, as if it was just a soft cry that would eventually lull him to sleep. He hadn’t expected him to start screaming and flailing, uselessly gasping for air. It hauntingly reminded him of Hak-yeon’s first attack, and that terrified him.

Saet-byul looked somewhere between horrified and absorbed, staring in wonder. When he felt Hong-bin finally calm, his body relaxing as he fell asleep, he addressed her. “Don’t speak to him so harshly. He doesn’t react well.”

She looked appropriately cowed. “I’m sorry. He started accusing me and I got angry-”

“Hong-bin doesn’t lie. He can’t lie. If he says something, there’s some truth to it.” She seemed to understand his implication, her face paling. “This doll, from what I’m understanding, can cause Hak-yeon harm if you hurt it.” She didn't move for the longest time, her hands shaking, though in the end she gave a soft nod. “Is it like a voodoo doll?”

Her face scrunched up. “We don’t use that name…”

“So it is?”

“It’s the reason my mother was arrested. She creates dolls by binding humans to them, sewing their hair and painting them with their blood.”

Taek-woon felt himself grow sick, the blood draining from his face.

She looked visibly tired as she lifted up her arm, rolling back the sleeve of her dress to reveal a long scar that ran down her forearm. “My mother did this to get my blood. She put it on N’s doll so that we would be connected. If you look at N’s right side, he has one too. My mother stabbed him there to get his blood.”

Suddenly Hak-yeon’s insistence to never wear clothes that showed skin made so much sense. He imagined scars similar to his hands all over his body.

“All of those that were sent to the hospital with N were dolls my mother had locked in the basement. She tortured them down there.”

When Hak-yeon had been brought to the hospital, he had heard reports from the police and murmurs from the doctors about how he’d been rescued from the basement. He thought back to the time he first saw Hak-yeon once he had finished surgery, the ugly scars and bruises decorating his skin. Hak-yeon had told him it was the first time she had done that to him, that he had never been hurt before. He was only meant to watch Saet-byul-

He turned his eyes back to her, seeing her in a new light as the seemingly innocent girl he knew her as darkened. She had known. He remembered how she had always carried that doll around, wondering why she loved such an ugly looking thing. Now it all made sense, why Hak-yeon was always slightly disconcerted at the sight of it, how she cared for it like a precious treasure. It made sense why they had all been so terrified of her, and why only he had been confused at their behavior. It all made sense.

“Then...that doll you always carried around…”

She hiccupped, a tired smile on her lips, as she lifted her purse into her lap, tenderly lifting the ratted doll up. “Yes,” she whispered, holding it up so he could finally get a clear look. “This is N’s doll.”

His eyes ran over it as quickly as he could, wanting to commit every little detail to memory. There were a few strands of hair stitched to the top of the head, a crude little smile stitched into its face. It was poorly made, the limbs barely attached and with a misshaped heart and eyes, to which he now knew were painted with Hak-yeon’s blood. Saet-byul smiled as she cradled it to her chest, running her finger down it’s face. “N was meant to be my doll. I was supposed to take care of him and he was supposed to stay by my side forever.”

“Then…”

“My mother was never supposed to touch him. He was mine.” Her fingers tightened and Taek-woon panicked, realizing that she was hurting Hak-yeon.

“Don’t do that!” he cried out, reaching over and attempting to pull the doll away from her. She reacted, slapping his hand away and scooting her chair back.

“You can’t touch it,” she said dangerously, her voice low. He paused, momentarily surprised at her vicious tone. Hong-bin shifted next to him, Taek-woon’s sudden movement having woken the boy. He blinked blearily before his eyes landed on the doll, stiffening in his seat.

“Put away!” Hong-bin demanded. “Don’t hurt Hak-yeon hyung!”

Now Hong-bin’s constant ranting about Saet-byul being dangerous to Hak-yeon made sense. Everything was making too much sense. He felt sick to his stomach as he watched Saet-byul put the doll back in her purse, thinking how each jostle could potentially hurt Hak-yeon. Anything she did could hurt him. Saet-byul noticed his stare, and her face crumbled.

“See? I told you. You’d hate me.”

“I…” No, he didn’t hate her, but he wasn’t sure what exactly he was feeling. He had tried numerous times to imagine what had really gone on between Saet-byul and Hak-yeon, but never would he have guessed something like this. If he hadn’t witnessed Hak-yeon fall apart in front of him and Saet-byul covet that doll, he wouldn’t have believed them. But there was too much evidence to ignore, too many things that made sense. No, he didn’t hate her, but a part of him was suddenly very afraid of her.

“Horrible person,” Bin snapped, and he looked at the younger boy in shock but felt his mouth run dry when he tried to defend her. “Wicked girl.”

“No…” Saet-byul whimpered. “I’m not like that...I’ve never hurt N. Never…”

“You’re evil. Always.”

“No…”

“Binnie…” Taek-woon finally whispered, and he could see Hong-bin freeze. He had never called Hong-bin by just Bin alone, believing that the way for him to get better was to start referring to him by his real name. But now he wasn’t looking at Hong-bin as just a sick boy. He realized now why Hong-bin was the way he was, why Hak-yeon was so protective of him, why he was so terrified and angry at Saet-byul. Hak-yeon had said he was the only one that was able to stay out; did that mean Hong-bin had been in the basement the whole time? “Acting like this won’t help Hak-yeon.”

Hong-bin paused, more insults on the tip of his tongue, though eventually he sat back in his chair and kept his mouth shut.

“Now...Saet-byul…” He realized his voice was shaking; he only hoped she didn’t notice. “You’re really not hurting Hak-yeon’s...his doll?”

She shook her head fervently. “No, I never would.”

“Does he get hurt when you’re hurt? He might be reacting to when you’re hurt.”

She flinched at the word ‘hurt’, though she didn’t say anything right away. “It...it shouldn’t work like that. It’s supposed to be only when the doll is hurt.”

“It’s been happening almost every day.” Her face paled as fingers traced her black eye.

“It shouldn’t...maybe...maybe you’re right.” She lowered her head for a second. “My mother never explained it to me, but N is supposed to be a special doll because she used both of our blood for his doll. Do...do you think that’s why he feels my pain?”

He didn’t answer, couldn’t answer, everything still too new and raw to even attempt to give his own ideas. He was still trying to wrap his head around his best friend being a voodoo doll. How...how could she expect him to answer? Hong-bin didn’t seem to have an answer either, instead just burying his face into Taek-woon side. He wrapped an arm around Hong-bin’s shoulder, giving him a reassuring squeeze. “I...I don’t know how to answer you Saet-byul. But for now...for now,” he took a deep breath to steady himself, “we should end this. It’s probably best I bring Hong-bin home.”

She looked hurt, but nodded all the same. “I-I see… I’ll try to find out what’s going on. If...if I find anything I’ll let you know.”

At that, Taek-woon stood up, helping Hong-bin to his feet. “I’ll check on Hak-yeon. Depending on how he feels would determine whether I’ll let him meet you or not.” A small part, no, a large part of him wanted to keep his friend far, far away from her, to keep him safe. Now that he knew she held in her hands a way to hurt him, he never wanted to let the two get near each other again. But...but if letting them meet can alleviate Hak-yeon of his fits and help him get back to normal, he’d do it.

Saet-byul stood up with him, smiling that seemingly innocent smile. “Thank you Taek-woon oppa.”