She never regretted bringing Hak-yeon and Hong-bin into their home. She had noticed the way Taek-woon would smile whenever Hak-yeon wasn't looking, how her son was always so mindful to do little things for the other boy. It was so sweet, and there were times she wished time would stop so her son would be happy like this forever, forever enshrouded in the happy cocoon that he had finally allowed himself to be engulfed in.  

Taek-woon and Hak-yeon had been attached at the hip originally, one unable to be found without the other close behind. Neither Hak-yeon nor Hong-bin were able to go to school, the two having to be hospitalized the first time they tried going to such a crowded place, so they were only able to be together outside of then. It was so obvious on Taek-woon's face, his face so bright and happy when he came home and so saddened when he had to leave.  

They ate together, played together, studied together, slept together; Taek-woon clung onto Hak-yeon in a way she had never seen him hold onto anyone before, with such a fervor that she would have been terrified if she hadn't known Hak-yeon wouldn't leave.  

She should have been terrified.  

The two initially ignored Hong-bin, or more in the sense Taek-woon made sure to do things that would distract Hak-yeon from paying attention to Hong-bin. It was always easy to distract Hak-yeon, the boy at times not completely there as he would stare off into space with tears in his eyes. She never learned what really happened to Hak-yeon, never asked, and Taek-woon always made sure to stop her before she could mention anything. Whatever it was, Hak-yeon clung onto Taek-woon with the same intensity, always needing to make sure Taek-woon was okay and safe.  

Every time her son came from school, Hak-yeon would awaken from his self-induced stupor to run to his side, immediately running his hands over his face as if to make sure he was real.  

She tried, at times, to try and implement herself into their lives, uncomfortable with how close and how dependent they were becoming of each other. She convinced Hak-yeon to see a therapist, was unable to convince Hong-bin, made sure to ask how their days were and if they ever wanted anything. It never worked, she was too strong, too forward; it turned Hak-yeon off, who immediately clamped down and refused to tell her anything, only giving her curt answers that gave nothing away. Hong-bin grew scared of her and her constant questions, running and hiding behind Hak-yeon when she would come close.  

Yet she refused to turn them out of the house like her husband asked almost every night, knowing that despite Taek-woon's growing dependence on Hak-yeon's existence, he was changing.  

Hak-yeon was good for him.  

Hak-yeon, she noticed after a couple months, seemed to punish himself when Taek-woon wasn't home, as if there was no distraction to keep his mind away from things. She knew she was already on thin ice in their relationship and tried to stay as neutral as possible, watching as he would slowly break down, burying his head in his hands and cry. The one time she tried to comfort him he exploded, grabbing a nearby hairbrush and swinging at her, screaming not to touch him. She was startled, confused when he cried about a Seok-jin, and how it was all his fault and he shouldn't be here, shouldn't be comforted. It was only Hong-bin who was able to comfort him, the two hugging and muttering things that only they would be able to understand.  

She didn't know who Seok-jin was, Hak-yeon would never speak of him otherwise, but she knew whoever he was, he was very important to him. On a certain winter day every year while Taek-woon was at school or out of the house, she would watch Hak-yeon, with a somber Hong-bin glued to his side, take a lone candle out and place it on a table. Neither would say anything as he lit it, bowing once before sitting there, watching the small little flame flicker until the wick ran out and they were left with only a small wisp of smoke. 

She made the mistake of asking Hak-yeon's mother who Seok-jin was, felt her chest tighten painfully as she watched the other woman collapse to the floor, crying terribly.  

"My Seok-jin," she wailed shrilly, "that terrible woman killed my Seok-jin. She killed my Seok-jin in front of Hak-yeon, and my baby blames himself."  

She watched Hak-yeon the next time during one of his stupors, how he would cry and whimper Seok-jin's name to himself. Sometimes, looking back, she wished she had comforted him anyway, regardless of the danger that he would lash out at her again. The regret in Hak-yeon's voice was almost palpable, the despair so visible on his face.  

She never told Taek-woon about these, knowing how worked up he would get if anything happened to Hak-yeon.  

After a while Hak-yeon refused to go his therapist, claiming it wasn't helping. Not even Taek-woon was able to convince him to go.  

It was after the first year passed that things started to change. On the anniversary of them coming into their home, Hak-yeon grew irritable, not even Taek-woon able to satiate him. They would still do everything together, but if the slightest thing went wrong, or something didn't go the way he wanted, it would set him off, and it took a while before he would calm down. It became something that surprisingly only Hong-bin could solve, only the presence of the young boy able to quickly stop his tantrums. As the months passed by, Hak-yeon grew more dependent on Hong-bin, looking to the younger boy whenever feeling upset or frustrated, just holding his hand enough.  

The dependence on Hong-bin was very gradual, nobody noticed it at first. Taek-woon least of all; he still clung onto Hak-yeon, fervently, desperately. She knew something was off at school, that there was a reason Taek-woon was so vehement on coming back home. But Taek-woon refused to tell her, and there was very little she could do. Hak-yeon would always be there for him, rubbing soothing circles in his back and kissing his head in ways that she wished she as a mother could do, but that she was denied of.  

It was strange, Hak-yeon's mothering of Taek-woon, watching a young man not much older than her own son treating said son with such tenderness. A tenderness he shouldn't possess.  

Taek-woon clung to that mothering, was desperate to be loved by Hak-yeon. He refused to believe anything was different when he started coming home to see Hak-yeon doing that same exact thing with Hong-bin, the younger boy smiling happily in Hak-yeon's arms. She wanted to hate Hak-yeon for that, for making her son so dependent on him and yet so easily moving to Hong-bin, but she knew she couldn't.  

Hak-yeon hadn't done anything wrong. 

However, as time went on, Hak-yeon's behavior started to change until he was the one that needed the mothering, the one that needed comforting. Taek-woon initially didn't see the change, couldn't reciprocate the same emotional solace that Hak-yeon desired. Hong-bin did, however, and Hak-yeon finally shifted entirely to Hong-bin, the two never apart as they held each other all day. Still Taek-woon refused to acknowledge anything, coming to Hak-yeon for the same comforting, until one day Hak-yeon exploded, and everything was different.  

She remembered the day clearly, remembered what she had been doing and where everyone had been and what happened that led up to it. She had been cooking dinner, working in the hot kitchen and looking through the doorway to see Taek-woon and Hak-yeon sitting together on the couch, Hak-yeon curled up in a ball and staring off while Taek-woon watched him fondly. She remembered how they had seemed so cute, that if one didn't know what happened it would seem so innocent.

A new amusement park had opened just outside the city, and after a couple casual mentions to him, Taek-woon had asked her about taking Hak-yeon there, to get him out of the house and try to get him working in a crowd again. She had been so excited about Taek-woon proposing on his own to go somewhere public, to willingly go and do something that he would have run from originally, she had all but accepted it with open arms. For that day, she would turn a blind eye to him skipping school.  

Taek-woon had the tickets crumpled in his hands, nervously wondering how to bring it up to Hak-yeon. Hak-yeon was in one of his moods, it was hard to tell what he was thinking or feeling and one had to tread lightly to figure out what it was. Biting his lip, Taek-woon stuttered, "H-Hak-yeon?"  

Hak-yeon turned to look at him, a smile on his lips. A good sign. "Yes Taek-woonie?" 

Taek-woon hesitated; while he hadn't really noticed the change in Hak-yeon, he was slightly aware of it, now careful with his words, "I was thinking...would you like to go out tomorrow?" 

"With Hong-bin?" Hak-yeon asked, and the smile on Taek-woon's lips twitched.  

"No, just the two of us. Like before." Hak-yeon was silent, and even she was listening carefully, pausing in her cooking. "I...a lot of people like amusement parks, and you could try going in a crowd or-" 

"No." ­ 

She remembered how hurt Taek-woon looked, though he hid it behind a carefully crafted smile. "You don't have to worry about crowds, we can go during the week. No one goes then-" 

"I don't want to go," Hak-yeon snapped, his voice growing low. 

Taek-woon looked back down at the crumpled tickets in his hands, the paper soft from how clammy his skin was. "I...I want to go with you-" 

"I don't want to ing go," Hak-yeon nearly shouted, eyes wild as he whirled on Taek-woon, his fingers gripping tightly onto the fabric of the couch. She panicked at the sight, throwing down her knife as she ran in.  

"Taek-woon," she hissed, running over and yanking Taek-woon away when Hak-yeon started to hyperventilate, his angry eyes following them as he gasped.  

"I hate the amusement park," Hak-yeon continued, his voice growing shriller and shriller. "I ing hate them and I don't want to go!" Hong-bin shot out from one of the rooms, wrapping his arms tightly around Hak-yeon's middle while calling out his name. Taek-woon clung tightly onto her sleeve, both wanting to comfort his friend but too afraid to.  

"He'll be there! How can I go there when he's there? How can I look at him, when I had wronged him so?" Hak-yeon was screaming by now, and her husband was now in the room. He shoved Hong-bin aside as he grabbed Hak-yeon in a vice-like hold, one arm wrapped around his chest and the other holding his arms together. Hak-yeon thrashed, screaming and crying but unable to do much else.  

"I shouldn't be here, I should have died. It should be him you take to the park, not me. Not me!" 

"You didn't do anything wrong," she tried to reason, hoping to calm him down, though her voice only seemed to set him off more.  

"You don't know anything! None of you know! I'm tainted and broken, but he was so clean. He did nothing wrong. Why, why was it him?"  

"Hak-yeon," Taek-woon tried, his voice quiet as he watched fearfully, and Hak-yeon's head snapped to him.  

"Get away, you're not him, you're not him!" Hak-yeon bit down on her husband's arm, his hold on the squirming boy loosening enough that he was able to wrench an arm away, grabbing the TV remote off the side table and throwing it at Taek-woon. She shrieked when it knocked Taek-woon in the head, her son wincing and falling backwards, and her husband growled angrily as he slapped Hak-yeon hard in the face.  

"Don't hit him!" she cried out as she knelt down to tend to Taek-woon, the other sitting motionlessly as he cupped his cheek.  

But it did the trick, Hak-yeon stilling as only little sobs escaped his lips, and her husband finally let him go. Everyone was absolutely still as they watched him, just waiting for him to do something. Hong-bin shifted, everyone's eyes turning to him, and they watched as he slowly crawled over to Hak-yeon's side, leaning forward as he hugged him. Hak-yeon let out a shaky breath before turning his head into the crook of Hong-bin's neck, shoulder's trembling.  

Eventually Hak-yeon calmed down enough, lifting his head enough to see Taek-woon in her arms, her son's hand still holding the cheek where the remote hit him. Hak-yeon's eyes widened, pulling away from Hong-bin. 

"Taek-woonie," he called out, his voice hoarse. "Taek-woonie, did I...did I hurt you?"  

Taek-woon flinched in her arms, still unsure of what to do. Her husband's eyes narrowed, hurriedly motioning at her. "Get him out of here." She normally didn't like to be ordered like that, but she couldn't argue as she gathered Taek-woon up and pulled him away before he saw anymore, ignoring Hak-yeon crying out Taek-woon's name.  

Hurting Taek-woon was the straw that broke the camel's back, and she watched as Hak-yeon withdrew into himself completely. He seemed to give up entirely; no matter what she or anyone attempted they were unable to get even a reaction out of him. The only one who was able to even get him to move was Hong-bin, and even then they would only cuddle. It got worse when they developed the habit of hiding, squeezing themselves into corners and closets to hide away from them. They reacted violently when found, so the family learned not to disturb them.  

There were rare days when he would speak or act normally, appearing almost normal. There were traces of his listlessness; it took him longer to respond, longer to understand- they had to repeat things multiple times for him to comprehend.  

One night, she could hear Hak-yeon and Hong-bin talking in their room, Hak-yeon's surprisingly clear voice what stopped her.  

"Binnie," he said gently, Hong-bin in his lap, "can you promise hyung something?" 

"Promise?" Hong-bin muttered, eyes fluttering as if falling asleep.  

"Promise hyung...promise hyung that you won't let Taek-woon find out about me. Don't let him find about the dolls." 

Hong-bin blinked awake, tilting his head up to get a look at Hak-yeon's face, swallowing. "Lie?" 

"If you have to. Taek-woon...he can never find out. I can never let him know. You'll help hyung, won't you?" 

"Okay," Hong-bin promised quickly, picking gently at Hak-yeon's fingers wrapped around his waist. "I promise, Hak-yeon hyung." 

"Good Binnie," Hak-yeon purred, kissing Hong-bin's head.  

She sighed to herself at the sight, wishing they would be more open, to realize that no matter what happened they would always be accepting. She was just about to turn away when she saw the door to Taek-woon's room close quietly, and she realized that Taek-woon had heard. She quickly ran to his room, opening the door in time to see him fling the blankets over himself and pull into a small ball. She fought to put a smile on her face as she went over and sat at the edge of his bed, placing a tentative hand on his shoulder.  

"Taek-woon ah," she started, but he cut her off.  

"I don't understand...why did Hak-yeon leave me? He doesn't tell me anything anymore..." 

"You know there's a lot bothering him, it will take time for him to adjust. And you know he and Hong-bin share a connection because they went through the same thing. You have to accept that." 

"But I want to be that person for Hak-yeon. I want to show that I can be understanding, but he doesn't believe me." 

"Start slowly. You need to show him that you can be someone he can depend on. You have to be strong." 

She jumped when Taek-woon suddenly sat up, his hair flying up and looking slightly ridiculous compared to the serious expression he gave her. "I've been thinking," he said. "They aren't doing well here. I've been thinking of moving out to be closer to my university, and I was thinking of taking them with me." 

"What?" she nearly cried, pulling her hand away. 

His expression didn't change. "If I take care of them by myself, Hak-yeon will see that he can depend on me. He'll get better. I...I want him to get better.” 

“It's not a good idea. Taking care of them is a huge responsibility, and it'll be difficult, knowing how they are. Leave them home, Mom will take care of them-" 

"You know Dad doesn't like them, he only tolerates them because I'm here. If I leave, he'll make you send them away." She hesitated, knowing he was right. "I can get a big enough apartment that all three of us can live there. I'll find a job, something, to support us. It'll be okay." 

"Taek-woon, it's crazy. Don't worry about your father, I'll make sure-" 

"No," he said fiercely. "I won't let you take them from me. I won't let them leave me like you did." She bit her lip, guilt coursing through her as she reached out and held his hand. He pulled away, keeping himself a safe distance. 

"Taek-woon ah..." 

"Hak-yeon will stay with me. He'll always stay with me. I know he will." 

She stared at him for the longest time, staring sadly at how grown up her son looked, wondering where all the time went. She still remembered the small boy who smiled despite his inherent aloofness, who was kind and caring and loved her deeply. That boy disappeared a long time ago, and her heart ached. With a bitter smile she nodded her head.  

"Alright...you can go. Just know your father and I are here to help. If you need anything-" 

"I won't," he said abruptly, turning his eyes away.  

"W-well, just know we'll be here. If anything happens to the two, call me right away." 

"Alright," he agreed, still looking away. She sighed as she leaned forward and pulled him into a tight hug, squeezing this man that was her son but seemed so far away at that moment. He didn't hug her back, but when she thinks back, she likes to pretend he did.  

And true to his word, Taek-woon moved out a month later, Hak-yeon and Hong-bin clinging to the back of his jacket as they stepped out of the house. Her husband had went to work, so it was only her that came to see them off. She kissed them all goodbye, she had to wrestle Hong-bin in order to kiss him on the cheek, and made sure to tell them to give her a call when they arrived at the apartment. She never did receive a call, but the text from Taek-woon that read a small 'I love you' was enough for her.  

So no, she never regretted bringing Hak-yeon and Hong-bin into their home. She just wished they didn't take Taek-woon with them when they did.  

Hello!

Sorry, no advancing in plot this week, though we got to see what happened between the end of My Special Doll and the beginning of this one. But like promised, next chapter is the start of Hak-yeon (and Hong-bin) getting better, so please look forward to it!

Thanks again for reading!