Taek-woon couldn't believe it, sometimes didn't want to believe it. With each passing day the light in Hak-yeon's eyes returned, the warmth behind his smile reappearing. He knew the price for his recovery, knew that the only way for his friend to fully return would be to allow him to continue visiting Saet-byul. He was afraid every time he left the two alone, Saet-byul never wanting Taek-woon there, Joon-myeon's words echoing in his head. She was supposedly dangerous, could possibly hurt him...but when he would hear Hak-yeon's laugh or see his smile...he found himself agreeing again and again. And despite that, despite everything, there was something Taek-woon knew and held onto with relish.  

Hak-yeon was getting better.  

Today was one of his better days; he was laughing at something Hong-bin said as he folded laundry, patiently teaching Hong-bin how to fold one of his shirts. 

"Not like that, little Binnie," he chuckled, reaching over and shaking the clothing out, ignoring Hong-bin's devastated look. "You have to fold it like this." Hong-bin, determined to do well for Hak-yeon, furrowed his brow in concentration as he tried his best to copy the other's movements. His face lit up when he finished, Hak-yeon's string of praises causing him to beam proudly.  

"Look at you," Hak-yeon teased, hugging him close as he ruffled his hair. "Keep that up and you'll be folding all the laundry."  

"With Hak-yeon hyung?" Hong-bin asked tentatively. 

"Of course, where would I be without my little Binnie?" Hong-bin looked pleased with his answer, happily reaching out to try and fold one of Hak-yeon's shirts. Taek-woon was so engrossed in watching Hong-bin that he didn't notice Hak-yeon shift, blinking in surprise when he looked up to see Hak-yeon staring at him. The latter smiled, waving him over brightly. "What are you doing over there all by yourself Taek-woonie? You should help too!" 

"Help!" Hong-bin added, eyes still focused on folding.  

A small smile grew on Taek-woon's lips as he quietly got up from the couch, making sure not to make a sound as he made his way over. Very carefully, he settled next to Hak-yeon, hesitating for a second before deciding to sit just a little closer, letting their thighs touch. He watched the other carefully, holding his breath, waiting for Hak-yeon to scream and scramble away. Hak-yeon paused, his eyes looking down at their close proximity before he grinned again, reaching out and cupping Taek-woon's cheeks the way he always did to Hong-bin.  

"And how are you today hmm, Taek-woonie?" he asked, shaking his face and squishing his cheeks playfully. Taek-woon swallowed. He hated close skinship like this, would have abhorred anyone touching his face let alone squishing it; but this was Hak-yeon. Hak-yeon could do whatever he wanted and he would just be thankful to see it.  

He never answered, Hong-bin tugging on his sleeve and distracting him, allowing Taek-woon a chance to finally let out the breath he had been holding. He glanced over, taking this rare chance to get a look at Hak-yeon from up close. His skin was glowing; the other had been cleaning himself more and was more willing to eat. He was so thankful to see the shining tanned skin again, having gotten used to the greyed hue that had long taken over his friend. He was still thin, his cheekbones gaunt and his hands bony, but there was such a radiance around him that it was as if those were nonexistent.  

He looked good. 

"...wants to see you." He flinched to see both of them staring at him, realizing belatedly that Hak-yeon had been talking to him the entire time. He flushed, opening his mouth to say something when Hak-yeon tousled his hair, laughing. "Are you sleepy Taek-woonie? I was just saying that Saet-byul wanted to see you sometime, and wanted to invite you next time. But if you're sleepy I'll tell you later."  

God, he had forgotten how touchy Hak-yeon had been.  

He loved it.

"When does she want to see you next?" he asked, his stomach fluttering when Hak-yeon starting petting his head in thought.  

"Hmm, sometime next week? I'm sure she'll call and let me know." He pinched his cheek, giving him a pat before going back to Hong-bin and the laundry. Slowly, his stomach still in knots, he reached up where Hak-yeon had pat his head, swallowing heavily. Hak-yeon...he... 

Both Hak-yeon and Hong-bin's head snapped up at the sound of loud voices outside his apartment, no doubt some partying students from his university walking by. They weren't usually too bad, only noisy on certain weekends, but- He turned to see Hak-yeon's eyes wide, the brightness faded as they were replaced with fear, his arms wrapped protectively around Hong-bin's shoulders. "Hak-yeon-" Taek-woon tried to reassure, one of the voices outside laughing right outside the door, and Hak-yeon flinched away, scrambling to take Hong-bin with him.  

"Hak-yeon, it's okay," he tried again, though Hak-yeon was beyond understanding, shooting out of the room and running into the bathroom. There were a couple crashes inside before everything grew silent. Taek-woon let out a haggard sigh, looking down to the piles of folded clothes that Hak-yeon had kicked away when he ran.  

Of course with every step forward, there were so many steps back; with every good day there was one just as bad. But there was no point dwelling on that, it best to focus on the good. 

Tentatively, Taek-woon reached up to his head again, imagining Hak-yeon's hand there along with his bright smile.  

What he would do just to see him smile like that forever. 

--

Sang-hyuk wasn't sure he was fully okay with his situation with Saet-byul, his teeth digging into his bottom lip as he felt his mind swirling on his way home from class. He wouldn't deny that he loved every second she willingly rested her head on his shoulder, how she would purposefully hold his hand and smile at him when he would look at her. He just didn't like the idea that she was forcing herself to do this because he had confessed, that she felt bad for his unrequited feelings and was doing this for him. That, and he didn't like the fact she was doing this when he knew that deep down, she was probably still thinking of Hak-yeon.  

But there were days like today when he liked to pretend that she really did it because of him, not for him. 

He was snapped out of his reverie when he felt a hand on his shoulder, and he whirled around in surprise to find Jung Taek-woon staring down at him. He stared in shock for so long that Taek-woon seemed to get embarrassed, letting him go and stuffing his hands in his pockets. "Sang-hyuk," he muttered quietly, and that was enough to calm Sang-hyuk's hammering heart.  

"H-hello," he mumbled back, finally standing up straight to match him in height. Taek-woon seemed momentarily taken aback at him being taller, which Sang-hyuk would admit filled him with immense satisfaction.  

"How are you?"  

Sang-hyuk blinked at the question, wondering if he was missing something. He and Taek-woon weren't close, hadn't seen each for years until the day he brought Hong-bin with him to see Saet-byul. Hell, even when they did know each other they didn't talk much, their only connection having been Saet-byul. Along with Taek-woon being attached to Hak-yeon and he Saet-byul, he couldn't imagine why the other would want to willingly come up and speak with him. He floundered for an answer, "I'm alright, I guess. But why...?" 

"You were very angry when we met last time," Taek-woon said without ever taking his eyes off him, his gaze slightly unnerving. "I wanted to make sure you weren't still upset." 

"Yeah, well, I'm still upset," he bit back, refusing to look him in the eye. "But I realize I was an . Saet-byul told me there was a 'reason' Hak-yeon left, so I guess I can't be too mad at him." 

Now it was Taek-woon's turn to be confused, his brow creased. "Saet-byul told you?" 

"She wouldn't tell me the reason, just said there was one." 

Taek-woon seemed to relax considerably at that, his face smoothing out until it was expressionless again. Sang-hyuk felt slightly weirded out by that. "So that's all she told you..." 

He felt his temper flare, his fists shaking as he tried to school his expression the best he could. "Wait, she told you? She kept this big secret that nearly killed her, but she went and told you?" He couldn't place the exact reason he was upset; in normal instances he would have been happy for her to have told anyone the things that ate away at her. But he couldn't help that he was pissed that it was Taek-woon that she had told first.  

Taek-woon didn't react to his shout, only shaking his head. "I only know by accident. I was never meant to know." His face softened, a small frown on his lips. "But it is not something you will want to know Sang-hyuk. If you truly love Saet-byul, you will not ask her." 

Sang-hyuk felt himself deflate, surprisingly not a bit upset at the condescending sounding words coming from the elder, able to feel the warning in the other's voice. There had always been the possibility that whatever it was she was hiding was something much bigger than he could imagine, remembering the way she had looked the day she stepped out of the hospital all those years ago. She had looked so small, so lost; yet she would not tell him what happened. When asked about Hak-yeon, she would only say that he was gone. He couldn't do anything for her, and had focused all that helplessness he felt towards her into anger towards Hak-yeon, anger at how he had left her so quickly. He had never once considered that there could actually be a legitimate reason as to his sudden departure. He swallowed, suddenly empty of the anger-filled adrenaline that had been coursing through him only seconds ago. "Is it...is it really that bad? Saet-byul had mentioned he wasn't well."  

Taek-woon sighed, his eyes finally leaving him as they looked down to the ground. "He has been getting better recently. But no...he is not well." 

Sang-hyuk felt his mouth dry. "Was that why he couldn't see her?" 

Taek-woon's eyes flashed before glaring at him, his next words harsh. "Do not talk lightly about this, Sang-hyuk. Hak-yeon has been suffering just as much as Saet-byul has." 

"I..." he stuttered, lost for words, "I didn't mean it like that." Taek-woon didn't reply, his face still contorted in what he could guess was anger; Sang-hyuk  his lips. "I never knew he was sick. Saet-byul never said anything." 

"Saet-byul didn't know either." 

"Why-" 

"Hak-yeon didn't want anyone knowing." Taek-woon's face slipped back into the passive expression he always held, looking up to the sky. It was then that Sang-hyuk was able to see how tired the other looked, everything about him seeming exhausted. It made him seem more human. "Hak-yeon didn't want anyone to see him the way he was." 

He felt sick. "What...what happened to him?" 

Taek-woon shook his head. "It is not my place to tell you. Maybe one day, Hak-yeon will be comfortable enough to speak of it. But for now you will have to wait." 

"Then..." he his lips again, feeling his mouth go dry with every passing second. "Would you tell him I'm sorry? I didn't...I didn't know..." 

Taek-woon smiled, reaching out and putting a hand on his shoulder. "He wouldn't be angry with you. If anything, he would probably be ecstatic to hear how much you did to help Saet-byul." Sang-hyuk flushed, remembering Saet-byul telling him of all the times Hak-yeon had about him, and how much he had supported the idea of their relationship. He wished he knew all this earlier, so he wouldn't have this overwhelming feeling that he was an hanging over his head. It made him feel terrible.  

Taek-woon seemed to note his mood, switching topics. "Are you already in university?" 

Sang-hyuk grinned, more than happy to be away from that topic. "Just started this year." 

"You must be very smart-" Taek-woon was cut off by a ring from his pocket that had him scrambling in worry, and Sang-hyuk wondered who could be calling that would have someone as composed as Taek-woon panicking like this. He watched as Taek-woon put the phone to his ear without checking, his normally quiet voice sharp with concern. "Hak-yeon? What's wrong?" 

Sang-hyuk felt his body stiffen as the name rolled off Taek-woon's tongue, only hearing bits and pieces of a muffled voice on the other end. "What happened? Where are you now?" Whatever was said was enough to get Taek-woon to turn around right then and there without giving Sang-hyuk even a goodbye, nearly running down the street. Sang-hyuk was not far behind him; he still had guilt coursing through him with the revelations that Hak-yeon had been sick, and if something had happened to him, he wanted to make sure he was okay.  

It was the least he could do. 

"Is Hong-bin with you?" Taek-woon continued to ask into the phone, sending Sang-hyuk a quick glance but too preoccupied to do anything about. "Okay, don't move. I'll be there as soon as I can. Be careful, okay?" 

There was silence on the other end for a while before Taek-woon nodded his head, his eyes so gentle as he spoke. Sang-hyuk noticed that he'd only ever seen any emotion on Taek-woon's face when he spoke of Hak-yeon. "Alright, I won't hang up. I'll be right here."  

Taek-woon glanced at him, his mouth a firm line. "Sang-hyuk is with me. Do you want to see him?" Sang-hyuk blinked, startled that he would even mention him when only just a little while ago he had been talking about how much he hated him. But it seemed to do the trick, Taek-woon repeating Sang-hyuk's name multiple times and promising him that he will be there. He felt his stomach sink at the way Taek-woon spoke into the phone, as if talking to a child, and he wondered how bad the other could possibly be.  

His question was answered after almost a half hour of half running, half jogging down the side of the street, a large apartment complex coming into view. Taek-woon didn't wait to give him any instructions before running to the front door, moving around the front steps to where a bunch of brush had been planted for decoration. Pushing aside blossoming branches, Taek-woon knelt down to where two people were hunched over in a pile of melting snow. At the sound of Taek-woon's gentle prodding, the two looked up and Sang-hyuk felt his breath get caught in his throat, a cold sweat breaking over his skin. 

There was Hak-yeon, clinging onto Hong-bin with his face buried into his shoulder, tears in his eyes as he jumped onto Taek-woon the moment the other whispered his name. There was Hak-yeon, shaking and shuddering in Taek-woon's embrace as he cried, his cries a string of unintelligible words.  

"I can't Taek-woon," Hak-yeon cried after a few minutes, his words finally starting to make sense. "It's all my fault. I took him away from him. I took him away." 

Taek-woon shushed him, pulling his face away and wiping his tears. "It's not your fault. You didn't know." Hak-yeon hiccupped, shaking his head slightly when Taek-woon's eyes narrowed, the two engaged in a silent conversation. It was in that instance that Sang-hyuk felt like such an outsider, feeling almost like a voyeur at watching something that was clearly meant to be between the two of them alone.  

Whatever they said to each other worked, Hak-yeon finally calming down as his breathing slowed, and it was then that he finally noticed Sang-hyuk. His eyes lit up, breaking away from Taek-woon as he made his way over.  

Sang-hyuk trembled under Hak-yeon's gaze; he was too thin, his eyes so clouded. Hak-yeon put his hands on his shoulders and Sang-hyuk was acutely aware of how each bone jutted out under his skin, his skin looking almost paper thin as it stretched painfully over every muscle. He looked so sick. Didn't...didn't Taek-woon say he was getting better? 

"Look at you, little Hyukkie," Hak-yeon whispered, his cold hands running over Sang-hyuk's face and through his hair. "You have gotten taller." 

"I-I...yeah..." 

Hak-yeon didn't seem to notice his stutter, a wide smile growing on his lips. "You've gotten so handsome. I'm proud of you." 

And then he was gone, going back to Hong-bin and hugging the other who looked so happy to be back in his embrace. Taek-woon sent him a knowing look when the two weren't looking, and Sang-hyuk swallowed.  

He didn't know what happened, had unfairly blamed Hak-yeon this entire time. Saet-byul had said she wanted to help him get better, and as he watched Taek-woon quietly herd the two back inside, he decided. He would help too- he would help his hyung get better.