My Heart Will Be Forever Yours
Broken Promises
Kikwang walked over to Jessica, his face grim when she looked up.
“Oppa” Jessica started but Kikwang cut her off.
“What do you want?” he asked his voice hard. He can’t even stand to look at her.
“Oppa. I'm really sorry, I...I can’t do anything right...I can’t...I feel...” Jessica tried to get the words out but it seemed to trip over each other and came out as a bunch of disarranged words.
“I don’t want to hear it, I just came back from her funeral...Jessica...her funeral...you should be happy shes died, after all, you tried to kill her more than one time” Kikwang spat. Jessica took a step back as if it was physical blow.
“Oppa, I swear, I felt horrible, and I feel like I got blood on my hands...I felt like I killed her myself...and...It’s a horrible feeling...” Jessica looked up as she tried to contain her tears. Her hands shook but she grabbed it tight.
“I’m going to America...just for a while...give you some time...I understand if you don’t want to see me...I’m so sorry...I don’t think I can live with myself if I didn’t come to you...” Jessica wiped her tears away with shaky hands.
“I’ll get going now” Jessica gave Kikwang a small smile, a wobbly one before walking away. As she started to walk away, Kikwang started to speak.
“I forgive you...for everything. We have nothing against each other now” he turned around to face her but she didn’t turn around.
“Thank you” she whispered softly before continuing down the steps.
The other members eyed her as they walked past each other, Jessica kept her head down.
“Dude, you just going to forgive her...just like that?” Yoseob asked, Kikwang just nodded.
“You can’t hold a grudge forever, she knows she wrong and that’s all that matters”
10 years later
“Appa!!” Kikwang looked up from his newspaper and saw his two little girls running up to him with bows in their hairs and dressed in their pink little outfits.
“Darlings, keep your voice down please” Kikwang said as he lifted the girls up and settle them on his knees.
“Why are we going anyway?” the girl sitting on his left knee asked. Miyoung, her name was and the one on his right knee is Tiffany. Kikwang was fortunate enough to have twin girls but they could become handfuls sometimes.
It’s been 7 years since BEAST disband and the members went on their own paths, they still meet up during public holidays and birthdays, which was also a blessing. Kikwang now works as a dance choreographer and vocal trainer for cube.
“We are visiting appa’s friend remember. We go there every year” Kikwang spoke slowly for his 5 year old girls. They smiled brightly and nodded.
“I’m gowing to giwe her a painting I painted at scwool” Tiffany said, holding up a small piece of A4 paper.
“well, I’m gowing to giwe her my pwant cactus, it’s cawed spawky” Miyoung smiled up at Kikwang.
“that's lovely” he planted a kiss on both their heads and hugged them tight.
“I’m ready! Let’s get going” Jessica came in the room and smiled at them.
Kikwang never thought he could fall for the person who tried to kill Tiffany, the person who has been nasty to her but that person died along with tiffany. Kikwang was dumbfounded when he saw Jessica again, she was totally different. it made her more attractive. She doesn’t throw herself on him, she’s respectful and all that. Kikwang could feel her hesitation when she met him again at first.
They scored a drama together and it seemed like Jessica didn’t know he was her co-star. At the start, she would go straight to her trailer after each scene and apologise to him at the simplest things. Kikwang could feel the guilt of tiffany’s death stuck to her like super glue...hell, she doesn’t even look him in the eye when she talks to him.
Kikwang wanted to get to know the new Jessica. He gathered the courage to ask her out after 5 months of working together, she as shocked and astonished he asked her but she did accept anyways.
At the date, she started to apologised again and again about tiffany and Kikwang told her over and over again that he forgave her and he’s trying to move on and that she should too. Jessica seemed to ease off a little and told him about her trip to America. Kikwang couldn’t help but laugh at all the things she got up to.
After the date, Kikwang felt something he thought he could never feel again. The butterflies in his stomach and the accelerated heartbeat and the sweating but he did and he was sure as hell surprised.
He surprised himself when he kissed Jessica good night, she was caught off guard too but she went along with it.
After a year of dating, Kikwang was happier than he thought he could be. He was in love with Jessica but there was always that spot in his heart that Tiffany would always occupy and he’s not going to fix that, tiffany will always be in his heart.
“are you dating me just from sympathy?” Jessica asked him one time while they were strolling on the beach.
Kikwang stopped and looked at her, she wasn’t meeting his eyes, instead, she looked at the setting sun like it’s the most fascinating thing in the world.
“no, why would you think that?” Kikwang tilted her chin so she was looking at him.
“I wanted to kill her Kikwang...I feel like this is a revenge or something...you make me fall for you...then you go and break my heart...”
Kikwang was gobsmacked, he was left speechless as he looked down at Jessica, a small part of him was asking the same thing...was he just doing this for revenge?
“why would you think that? I swear nothing is fake. I never thought in a million years I would fall in love again but...when you changed...I can’t help myself...”
Jessica nodded but he could see in her eyes that she’s not convinced and shes just going along with whatever he’s saying...but he really does like her...love her and he needs her to know that...or this relationship would be over and that's the last thing he needed.
“I’m not going to lie that I don’t think of tiffany anymore, because I still do but that feeling is like a memory. She was the love of my life but now I have you...she’ll always be in my head and that corner of my heart forever but you are the one thing I care about now. She’s my past and my most cherish memory but you are my present and hopefully my future”
Kikwang bend down and planted a solid kiss on Jessica’s soft lips to seal the promise.
“Yeobo, we’re going to be late” Jessica said as she grabs a bouquet of Tiffany’s flower in one hand and the girl’s change bag in another. Kikwang was thankful and content that Jessica wasn’t jealous or annoyed that they still visit Tiffany’s grave every year on her birthday; instead, she encouraged him and always assuring him that she’s not mad.
“alright. Come on girls”
~*~**~~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Kikwang agreed with Bruce that they were going let Tiffany’s ash fly into the sea and set her free, Bruce went all out and bought a small cove just for Tiffany. He made a great big grave stone with Tiffany’s smiling face on it near the sea where she was set free so anyone who wanted to pay her respect can come over to the beach.
Kikwang would come here at night or early in the morning just to sit on the sand and watch the sun rise or set. He would sometime talk out loud and feel like a crazy person, but knowing no one was going to hear him, he says it anyway.
He brought Jessica here after 3 years of dating and as he expected it, Jessica was overwhelmed and cried, sobbing nonsense that sounded like a whole bunch of sorry.
“just take a deep breath and say everything out loud. I’m sure she’ll forgive you” Kikwang said as he wiped away Jessica’s tears. They spend 3 hrs there that days, Jessica saying sorry about every took up most of the time but after they left, he could see a whole lot of weight left her shoulders.
Kikwang help his two girls down the steep steps that lead down towards the private cove. As soon as they landed, Miyoung and Tiffany rushed towards the headstone and carefully place the painting and the cactus plant in the sand.
“here” Jessica handed Kikwang the flowers. Kikwang smiled at her before walking over slowly and place the flowers on the ground and gave Tiffany’s headstone a kiss. Jessica looked at them with teary eyes but she wiped them away before Kikwang could see.
Kikwang gathered both of his girls in his arms and introduced them to tiffany as if she was a real person.
“hey, she copied my name” Tiffany said as she giggled.
“she’s also called Miyoung” Kikwang smiled at Miyoung as she frowned.
“she copied my name” Kikwang kissed Miyoung’s forehead and the frowned disappeared.
“umma, come hewe and meet aunty Tiffany” Tiffany said as she waved her mother over. Jessica sat down set to them and placed her hand on Tiffany’s headstone.
“come here with me” Kikwang said as he let go of his girls and took Jessica’s hand in his. They left the girls to play around near the headstone as they walked down to the water.
“I love her...but you should know I will always love you...until the day I die” Kikwang said to Jessica. She smiled up at him.
“I know” Kikwang bend down and kissed Jessica, hugging her to him, they broke apart when they heard their girls giggling.
“umma and Appa awe kissing” Miyoung said.
“EWWWW” Tiffany commented.
Jessica and Kikwang looked at each other as they shared a private joke.
“come here to umma you two” Jessica said as she crouch down and opened her arms, the two girls ran to them while laughing and giggling.
Kikwang crouch down as well and hugged both his kids and his wife. Life may not always turn out as we imagine it but sometimes, it could turn out different...perhaps for the better.
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Tiffany sat next to Kikwang after the girls fell asleep and are now in the car with Jessica. Even though he couldn’t see her, she still felt happy that she could watch over him and still see him live his life. Who would’ve known he would become a trainer, tiffany always thought he could become a solo artist like Yoseob or something or an actor like Doojoon.
Tiffany was always there with him, at the wedding where he looked like the happiest person in the world or at the big concert before beast disbands. She didn’t want to visit him during the honeymoon or the baby delivery...because that would be weird...she was there with him when Jessica had twins and Tiffany was thrilled that the girls were named after her.
So basically speaking...Tiffany has not moved on yet. Her mother and father was waiting for her on the land of the dead while tiffany still wanted to see what Kikwang got up to in life.
But now...she feels like it’s time to move on. Kikwang seem to have everything under control and Tiffany felt at peace to leave him with his lover. Tiffany felt a tinge of jealousy but she totally understands. She can’t have him mourned over her forever that would make her even more sad, knowing that he has someone that cares for him as much as she does satisfy her.
“it’s time for me to go” she said to Kikwang, she smiled when Kikwang tilted his head towards her direction as if he could hear her for real.
“you stupid head oppa” Tiffany whispered in his ear and she laughed when Kikwang shivered.
“I'm going to miss you...see you on the other side” tiffany said as she kissed his cheek. Kikwang stilled and raised his hand to touch his face where tiffany has kissed it. He then smiled when he had a feeling Tiffany was there.
“I love you oppa” tiffany said as she placed her invisible hand on his.
“I love you Tiffany” Kikwang whispered, a smile playing on his lips.
Tiffany smile at him one last time before she disappears, still touching Kikwang’s hand.
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I know you all hate me right now for making Jessica and Kikwang end up together but LET me explain.
I guess the whole time, the whole story, I was trying to send a message. Never hold grudge and always forgive, cliche...I know.
It’s a moral that everyone should follow by, if you don’t let go then it’ll just hurt you, not forgiving someone never benefit anyone. Kikwang forgave Cherry, Tiffany forgave Kikwang, Tiffany forgave Jessica , Kikwang forgave Jiyong, and Kikwang forgave Jessica. See where I'm going with this? :)
It’s like this saying I like “Never forgiving someone is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to suffer”
Even though the ending is not what anyone expected, I’m still happy with it. It has meaning that lurks underneath the story, not just a cheesy happily ever after.
I wouldn’t feel right to make everyone hate Jessica forever because...really, she’s not in her right mind and all she wanted was for Kikwang to notice her...she just went about it the wrong way.
THANK YOU ALL FOR ALL THE SUPPORT OF READING THIS STORY.
I ALWAYS ENJOYED READING YOUR COMMENTS, SOME JUST BRING A SMILE ON MY FACE :3
I LOVE YOU ALL FOR CONTINUEING TO READ MY STORY, EVEN AT THE STAGE WHERE I UPDATED IRREGULARLY.
PLEASE CONTINUE TO SUPPORT ME ON MY UPCOMING FANFICS ABOUT TIFFANY (since I’m so in love with her) AND SUGGEST WHO SHE SHOULD BE PAIRED WITH.
Comment on what you think of the story as a whole and subscribe? ;)
MY FIRST FANFIC FINISHED!!!!!<3<3
ITS LIKE A WHOLE LOT OF WEIGHT LIFTED OFF MY CHEST!
starting new fanfic ALREADY!! FLOODED WITH IDEAS!!!
CHECK IT OUT!
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