It's been two days since that night. I haven't talked to her since. Yes, I run into her from time to time. After all, we are neighbors. It was unavoidable. But I don't talk to her. But then again, that wasn't weird of me.

The weird thing was that she doesn't talk to me. Not even a hi, or a hello. When she sees me, she just looks at me then nods at my direction as if to acknowledge my presence. Nothing more, nothing less.

Not that I cared. I mean, I was the one who announced that I didn't want to have anything to do with her anymore. In fact, I should be rejoicing. Wasn't that what I wanted from the start? After all my attempts to shoo her away, this time, it worked. I should be happy. Only that I wasn't. I wasn't happy at all.

"Grandpa wants us to have dinner with him tonight," Chaerin informed me on the other line.

"Yeah, okay," was all I said. She said the details of the dinner, the time and the venue but I wasn't paying attention. All I heard was that she was going to pick me up at 8 in the evening. Thankfully, she said no more then hung up.

I watched Daesung pull out a tray from the oven as I sat across him. In it was a dozen of chocolate in different shapes. There was a flower, a book, a ball, a guitar, etc. But my eyes narrowed at one particular chocolate. It was in the form of a letter D. At the corner of my eye, I saw Daesung smirk as if he meant for me to see it. I ignored him. The chocolate reminded me of the necklace and the bracelet sitting in my bedroom, waiting to be given to the owner. I could give it to her easily if I wanted to. Heck, I could even leave it on her doorstep. But I wanted her to ask for it. I didn't know why. I just did. Was it because I wanted her to talk to me?

I was beginning to feel annoyed at where my thoughts were leading me.

"Go on, try it," he urged, breaking me out of my thoughts. He was referring to the chocolates.

I shook my head. "You know I hate chocolates."

"Yes, you do, but not the chocolates that I make. Anyway, just try it. I trust your opinion. Tell me if it's good or bad."

It was true that the only chocolate I eat was Daesung's. There was something in it that makes the taste different from other chocolates. Still, eating it was one thing. Lking or hating it was another.

"Why ask me? Why don't you ask your servants to try it for you? You have a lot of them around," I said matter-of-factly.

It was his turn to shake his head. "I need an honest opinion. Of course they will tell me it's good no matter how it tastes! Not that I'm not confident with my skills but what if it was bad? Do you think they would tell me 'oh, master, it '?" He tried to imitate one of the female maids.

He's got a point. "Seungri?"

He gave me a look that says, been there, done that. "He was the first person I thought of. But I called him and the poor thing couldn't even utter a word properly on the phone! He sounded awful. Turns out his cousin fed him bad food and now he can't be anywhere without being close to a bathroom." He chuckled at the thought.

I found it amusing as well but since that meant I had no choice but to eat the chocolate, I growled at Daesung quietly then reached out for a chocolate. I realized I was grabbing for the letter D. I quickly grabbed the one next to it, hoping Daesung didn't notice. But I doubt it. Nothing escapes Daesung's sight. If he did notice, he was hiding it.

I looked at my palm to see that I grabbed a heart. It was worse as the D. I let out a sigh of frustration. I was beginning to think that I was over thinking things.

I bit off half of the chocolate. The taste melted in my mouth. The sweet taste that I hate so much. But the taste was mixed with something else. I have no idea what, but it tasted delicious. I quickly ate the other half.

"It's alright," I shrugged.

Daesung smiled. He knew what I meant. If Daesung loves something as much as he loves singing, it was baking. He placed half of the chocolates on a box, including the D chocolate, then handed it to me.

I raised a brow at him.

"It's just thanks, ya know. Accept it."

I took it and muttered, "Whatever."

Daesung kept the rest on the tray. He was probably keeping it there so the maids could taste them. He sat across me.

Was that all?

"You called me here just for that?"

Daesung looked thoughtful for a moment then nodded. "I guess."

Usually, Daesung would've prepared more chocolates for me to taste. But this time, it was just one. I gave him a suspicious look. "You're lying."

He grinned then raised his hands up as if to surrender. "You got me! Gee, you're really good, Ji!" He cracked up at his own joke. "Get it? Gee and Ji?"

I shot him a glare. When he saw I wasn't laughing with him, he cleared his throat and straightened himself up.

"Well, you see, Chaerin came to me yesterday," he began.

I instantly knew what she came for. It was about the incident that night, and the day after that. I went to the soccer training the following day but I wasn't quite myself. I kept missing the ball and kicking it out of the field. Seunghyun, the captain, let me off easily since it was a first. Still, that day was one of the worst. Every little thing ticked me off. Even Chaerin was afraid to get close to me.

"She's very worried, Ji."

"I'm fine."

"Of course you are," was what Daesung said. But judging from his tone, he wasn't convinced. He was eyeing me carefully.

"What?" I hissed.

He didn't say anything at first. i was beginning to feel impatient when he finally spoke. “Are you,” he seemed to hesitate for a moment then continued, “by any chance, afraid to get hurt? Again?”

That sure hit a spot. How dare he say I’m afraid? Who’s he to tell me such? He may be my best fried but he should learn to shut up.

A part of me wanted to punch him right in the face, but the other knew that he was right. I hated it when he was right. But I won’t let him have the satisfaction of getting to me. I raised my voice at him, “What are you talking about?”

He didn’t seem fazed by the volume of my voice. “You know what I’m talking about.”

Of course I did. The past seemed to flash before my eyes. I remembered the hurt and the pain I felt before. I never want to feel any of those again. That just means that he was right. Again. I was afraid.

“I’m not going to have this conversation with you,” I growled angrily at him.

“You know,” he paused, “if you hold back your feelings just because you’re afraid of getting hurt, you still end up hurting.”

I’m not holding anything back –was what I wanted to say. But words failed me. Was it because it wasn’t the truth?

His words cut me like knives. Yes, not just a knife, but knives. He must’ve had seen the expression on my face. He knew he got to me so he didn’t stop there. “Tell me,” I could see from his face that whatever he was seeing pleased him, “why are you so protective of her? Why did you get mad at Dara about the other night?"

I winced at the mentioned of her name. I didn’t know about the being protective part, but I knew the latter was a stupid question. "Anybody would've gotten mad at her! She almost got hurt and—" I stopped. I couldn't believe what I was saying. I sounded like someone concerned and worried.

What the? Was I?

As if he heard my realization, Daesung smirked. He got up from his chair and walked towards me. He patted me on the shoulder as if saying, Good. Now do what you must.

I couldn't even utter a thing. A lot of things were going inside my head. That couldn't be! Why would I be worried about someone like her? Besides, I already said I had nothing to do with her anymore.

"You do know that VVIP's concert's tonight, right? At 7."

It was only then that I noticed that Daesung was already in the kitchen door, his back facing me. But why was he telling me that? I don't plan on going to Seungri's favorite singer's concert.

"Ah, it seems like it's going to rain," he added. I looked at the window to see very dark clouds. It really did seem like it was going to rain. Very hard.

"I'll tell Chaerin to pick you up here instead, okay?" And then he left.

He left me in the kitchen dumbfounded about everything. It was as if he purposely left me there to think things through. I was confused. I looked at the chocolates Daesung gave me and wondered if it will help me think of something or anything. I grabbed one and shoved it in my mouth.

“If you hold back your feelings just because you’re afraid of getting hurt, you still end up hurting.”

Those words kept ringing over and over. I tried to ignore them but to no avail. It was starting to drive me nuts.

“What the heck did he mean by that?” I asked to no one in particular.

I grabbed another one of his chocolates from the box.

--

The rain was pouring hard onto the car’s windshield. The rain was quite a surprise since the sun was so high up yesterday and just this afternoon. Who would've thought it was going to rain?

Chaerin picked me up right on time despite the traffic. It must be because of the rain. Chaerin was telling me that grandpa told her to go on ahead and that he’ll follow since he was still in a meeting.

“What’s that?” she asked. She was referring to the box on my lap.

“Chocolates from Daesung,” I simply said.

“Oh. Too bad I don’t eat chocolates. But don’t you hate chocolates, too?” she stared at me in wonder. Hating chocolates must be in our blood.

Before I could answer her question, my phone rang. I reached for the phone in my pocket. It was Seungri. What was he calling me for? Wasn’t he supposed to be in the concert right now? I doubt the concert will be cancelled due to the weather since the venue was indoor. Just then, I remembered what Daesung said about Seungri. He said that he was sick. His exact words about him were, “he can't be anywhere without being close to a bathroom”. That only meant one thing –he couldn’t possible attend the concert in such condition. What about Park, then?

“If you hold back your feelings just because you’re afraid of getting hurt, you still end up hurting.”

There it was again.

I heard Chaerin ask, “Aren’t you going to answer that?”

I blinked at her then clicked the answer button on my phone. “This better be good, Seungri.”

“Jiyong…”

He did sound awful just as Daesung described. I looked out the window. The rain was pouring hard and it didn’t look like it will stop anytime soon. I just hoped Seungri wasn’t calling for what I think he was calling for.

Apparently, he was.

“I kept trying to contact her since this afternoon! She wasn’t answering! Not even my messages. Then, I was able to talk to Joohyun,” he said every word with such effort. “She told me she bumped into her this morning and Dara explained to her that she left her phone in her apartment and asked her to tell me that she’ll be waiting for me at the concert venue at 7! But of course, I didn’t tell Joohyun that I couldn’t go because she will kill me!”

He was worried that she’ll kill him? What about me? Wasn’t he worried that I would kill him?

“And also I thought if I stayed in bed all day, I’ll feel better but I feel just as worse! I’m so worried! Do you think she’ll still be there? It’s raining so hard. I doubt she even brought an u—”

The sun was so high up yesterday and just this afternoon. Who would've thought it was going to rain?

I immediately hung up on Seungri then turned to Chaerin, who had a look of confusion on her face, and said to her, “I have to go.”

Before she could reply, I handed her my phone and the box then ran out.

I haven’t really thought of what I was going to do. I don't even have aything with me. It was a good thing there was a traffic jam so I didn’t have to tell the driver to drop me off somewhere. I was already soaking wet but I didn’t care. I looked at my watch to see that it was already 8:15. The concert must’ve already begun. Would she still be there? I wondered. Knowing her, she would be. She knows how long Seungri has waited for the concert. She wouldn’t just leave. She must be thinking that he was only running late. Reasons would be flooding her mind like because of traffic due to the unexpected rain, or because a black cat crossed his path while he was on his way. I really didn’t know. All I know was that she wouldn’t leave until she hears from Seungri himself. What if guys found interest in her again? What if she tries to fight them on her own? She was crazy like that.

“If you hold back your feelings just because you’re afraid of getting hurt, you still end up hurting.”

I was beginning to understand Daesung’s words now. I could feel myself stop holding whatever back. I ran faster. I kept running and running. My legs seemed to know where to take me.

There. I found her. She was inside a convenience store, looking outside. She looked scared and worried. She was looking for Seungri, I thought. I saw that she was wet but at least she wasn’t soaking, unlike me. I let out a sigh of relief. She was safe. I ran to the store.

Once I was inside, Park clasped a hand over with a quick gasp at the sight of me. “Jiyong!”

What happened next was something I didn’t expect. I don’t know what has gotten into me. Even I, myself, was shocked.

I just walked up to her and wrapped my arms around her without saying a word. I could feel her body tense. I expected her to push me away but she didn’t. Even if she did, I didn’t care. I was just glad… glad to see her that she was safe. Things were starting to be clear to me now. The things Daesung were trying to tell me were starting to make sense. Also the first time I saved her, the fire incident, and the other night… why I got so mad at her, and why I seemed to be, in Daesung’s term, protective of her.

I, then, felt her relax. She was letting me hug her. That, alone, made me very happy. I felt her heart race against mine.

“I… I’m sorry…”  I breathed. I didn’t know how tired I was until then. I realized I was panting. It was probably because of all the running. Probably, I thought sarcastically.

I was sure she knew what I was apologizing for. I heard her sigh. But it was a positive sigh. I could tell. It was as if she was saying that she was glad.

Then I heard her say in the sweet voice I’m most familiar of, “Don’t be.”

I was caught off guard when I felt her arms wrap around me. It was my turn to feel my body tense. It was only then that I realized that she was hugging me back. I relaxed. Surely she was wet, and yet she felt so warm. How did she do that?

I was sure it was a feeling I didn’t hate. I was very sure of it.

“If you hold back your feelings just because you’re afraid of getting hurt, you still end up hurting.”

I let a small smile form on my lips. It was a first in a very long time.

I wanted time to stop right then and there. I didn’t want to let go of her. Ever.